My 1 year old has not yet slept through the night. He wakes up atleast once in the middle of the night crying frantically(sometimes twice). He is very sleepy but is uncomfortable. Even when I pick him up to sooth him, he still cries, stiffens his body, throws his head back as if he is in pain. He does pass gas and sometimes even burps. It usually takes 1.5 to up to 3 hours of rocking him, singing to him, walking to a different room to put back to sleep.
Tried a lot of things - gripe water, gas drops, bath before bedtime, tylenol, orajel, massage his tummy, burping him after his last feed. Sometimes I offer to feed him in the middle of the night just cause I am tired of him crying (nothing helps) . . .sometimes he takes it but still cries and sometimes he is not interested.
Pediatrician has checked his ears - always fine (just fluid but never an infection). Started 100% organic milk, but that probably made it worse (not sure). Now trying Soy milk along with Biogaia drops every day. I breast feed him at around 9:30-10pm and then in the morning around 5:30am . . feed time varies.(He does not really take a bottle from me.
He wakes up crying, every night.
I really do not want to do the Cry it Out method as I feel that something is really wrong. He does not throw up or anything.
Please Help!!
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Thanks so much for responding with solutions.
Some clarifications . . . when I say "Cry it out" method, I mean to just leave him to cry and not go at all till he stops crying. I have tried the 10 min wait for few nights in a row but to no avail.
I co sleep with him, just hoping that he would be near me and not wake up. But he still wakes up crying really bad every night.
When he cries, he does open his eyes after a bit.
Night terrors. My son had them at 13 months. Might just have to change his bedtime a bit. That's all it took for me
Hello. It could be lots of different things, but it sounds like you have tried lots of different things to fix the problem.
I second what WildWoman said about 5 minutes. This is NOT crying it out... Many parents do not realize that most children WILL cry between sleep cycles. It is actually normal for small children to cry between sleep cycles. That doesn't mean that every child will, but it is quite common. Some children naturally transition between sleep cycles, some quietly whimper between cycles, others will all out cry between cycles.
***The problem is that too many parents run right in the room the moment the child cries, and it actually WAKES the child up. That starts a whole painful cycle of the child being awake, confused, then having to try to settle the child back down, etc. Imagine when you are in a deep sleep and something happens to startle you awake. You're probably a little disoriented, your heart is racing, and you've got to settle yourself back down. Now imagine this happening to your small child who doesn't yet have strong sleep patterns established.
I strongly encourage you to make the commitment for 1 week to go with the 5 minute rule. Make sure you get your husband on board with this. When baby starts crying in the middle of the night, LOOK at the clock. Force yourself to lay there for 5 full minutes and see what happens. There is something about time in the middle of the night where it feels like forever...but there is a pretty good chance that your child will be back to sleep before the five minutes are up. If he isn't, then after the five minutes go into his room, calmly pat his back or tummy for a few minutes then leave again. Do not talk. Do not turn on the light.
I know that this is a really hard thing to do...I remember feeling much the same way as your question indicates you feel with our first child. Imagine my and my husband's shock when our baby was falling back asleep before the five minute mark....we couldn't believe it!
One last comment...this is where I politely disagree with some other views...we all have different REM cycles for a reason. It is just as important for baby to reach the deep levels of sleep as it is for an adult. I would try not to interrupt those sleep cycles if at all possible.
He should be sleeping the night through.
If he has pain - find out what is causing it. Fluid in the ears? Ask if they will consider tubes in his ears to help get the fluid out.
It sounds like you are changing things every day and not giving anything a chance to work. Instead of MASKING the problem - find out what the problem is.
Have you tried letting him cry or self-soothe for 5 minutes instead of jumping up and taking care of him? that's NOT cry it out - that's letting him see if HE can figure it out on his own...
Is his room cool enough? Is it too hot? Is he sweating when he wakes up?
does he have anything in his crib to help with soothing him?
Talk with your pediatrician. Find out what is causing his pain. Does he have food allergies that are causing the pain in his intestines? Does he have a gluten allergy? keep a log on his food intake and his behavior. Then go to the pediatrician with your timeline. It will help them help him.
Good luck
ETA - Just want to mention to the poster who is concerned about the REM sleep remark - this is ONLY about dealing with night terrors. (Maybe I wasn't clear.) If you can prevent a night terror by interrupting a sleep cycle, it is of value. I wouldn't interrupt it just because he's waking in the middle of the night. If this isn't a night terror issue, it won't work anyway.
Original:
Sounds like night terrors. Don't pick him up. It doesn't help anyway. Just sit there and pat him. Don't feed him in the middle of the night. Don't talk to him. Just be there.
Many women on this site have offered this advice for toddlers or older children, and you might consider this. Start nursing him earlier and putting him to bed a little earlier (9:00). (Not the 9:30 to 10:00 timeframe.) Then right before you go to bed, like around 11:00, wake him a little bit so that you break his REM sleep. Let him fuss a little, but don't pick him up. Just "disturb" him a little. Then go out of his room and go to bed. Disturbing the REM sleep may prevent a night terror. Some moms take their groggy and sleepy toddlers to the potty like this in order to break their sleep. Your child is too young for that, but the same idea applies.
However, it is a HABIT to wake up and then have someone fussing over them, holding them and all that. You need to take all of that out of the equation.
Good luck!
Hmm.
He's burping and has gas (only at night?).
It's possible he's got a food sensitivity and he might be getting exposed to it through your breast milk.
It would be worth it to see an allergist and have him checked out.
If he is sensitive to something, you have to eliminate that from your diet if you want to keep breastfeeding.
http://www.babymed.com/breastfeeding/breastfeeding-and-fo...
Does he open his eyes when he's crying or do they stay shut? If closed it may be night terrors. They can start about 9 months of age. My husband had them when he was younger so we expected one of our kids would. Our son did and it looked like how you describe your son's reactions: crying, stiff body, throw head back, takes time to calm down. My MIL said that for both of her sons, she had to be patient and reassure them, "Mommy's here, you're okay. I've got you. You're safe, I'll protect you. Nothing is going to get you." I talk in a soothing voice and brush my fingers through his hair. Eventually he relaxes and is sleeping again. It's frustrating and can be scary the first few times, but they do grow out of it. My son is almost 2 1/2 now and hasn't had a night terror in at least 8 months.
*Side note: when I talked to his doctor about night terrors, she told me he was too young, but the check-up papers I got that day had info about what to expect now that he was 9 months and right there in print was "night terrors".
So you have asked what is two plus two, and whole lot of us swear by 4. But you say "don't tell me 4"?
Ok - then what you need to do is co-sleep. He can only be comforted by being next to you constantly.
Or you can give him the lesson of learning to self soothe - but there I go again with my 4.
That sounds like what was going on with my oldest daughter. Turns out she was getting leg cramps due to restless leg syndrome, but at such a young age couldn't TELL me what was wrong. She would just scream and writhe in pain. Make sure he gets PLENTY of fluids throughout the day. You don't have to worry about nighttime dryness for a while, so really load him up on water. Dehydration was the root cause for us. You can also try giving him extra magnesium; but check with your doctor first.
This actually worked for me but no guarantees...if your baby is sleeping WAKE him up! Yes I said that right. Several nights in a row. If it is a security problem he will become used to YOU waking him up and he will continue to sleep. I know, I know sounds crazy, but it actually worked for me. After about a week and a half it didn't happen much more.
Yes to everything Amber C said. She is absolutely correct.
At that age, one of my girls took to sleeping on her stomach, and that reduced a lot of her tummy troubles for whatever reason. So... that's something to think about.
We use3d Ferber, it worked for us.
But we also experienced night terrors. At around 7 months, our kid would scream blood curling screams, and couldn't be soothed. We worked out that he wasn't taking to being soothed because he wasn't actually awake, because once he actually woke, he was soothed pretty quickly and back to sleep.
We just had to ride it out. Thankfully, it didn't last long for us.
Good luck to you and yours,
F. B.
