I have 10 month old twin boys. One has been able to pick up food and feed himself for a few months now. He also can hold his bottle. But my other boy relies on me to feed him... he'll pick up the food but then just hold it in his hand. He's the same way with a sippy cup and bottle...relies on me to hold it. I don't expect them to do things the same, but I think he's old enough to do these things.
So if anyone has any ideas that might help me, that would be great!
Thank you everyone for your input!!! It is always nice to hear what others have to say. My boys are individuals and I have treated them like that from the beinning and I always will. Majority of the advice I had gotten said he just wanted to be cuddled longer... Which I love doing! I have figured out that if i give him something bigger (that he can't break chunks off of and chock on) he will feed himself! And now he's started putting the smaller things (cereal/puffs) in his mouth now. Yah!!! Developmentaly both of my boys are right on track! And I'm not worried about then at all, it's just neat to hear what other parents have done or are doing!
Thanks again!
Congrats on the twins. I also have twins, they are 2 1/2 years old. Yes, I agree that he should be starting to hold his own cup and feed himself, but don't be too hard on him. Just keep helping him, but also leave him alone more to try on his own. Good luck and enjoy those twins.!!
I would take your son to his pediatrician and ask for a developmental assessment. If there are documented delays, a referral to your local Birth to Three program can help catch him up.
My daughter is 10 months and just started holding her bottle in the last few weeks. I felt the same way - that she should be doing it on her own, but also enjoyed the cuddle time. So I started holding her bottle in front of her to make her grab it and bring it to her mouth. She eventually started holding it longer and longer. I still hold her for her bottles, but she holds the bottle now. We have just started sippy cups, but I still hold her like I do when I give her a bottle.
Otherwise all I can say is just be patient. You already know that the twins are going to develop at different rates...enjoy the cuddle time while you have it!
good luck
Being a twin and having twins in the family I have a answer.
Your child wants his own attention and to be loved as a single birth child would.
Each child grows at their own pace.
A ten month old expectly needs love and attention.
ENjoy this time.
All babies grow differently and need love.
So hold him and reassure him you love him and he will grow happy.
If you do not give him his own attention you will have a battle for life from each child.
And twin battles for attention is no fun.
Besides ten months is to young to wean a child usually from a sippy cup now days.
I, too, have 10-month old twins (mine are girls though). Neither of them is feeding herself. In fact, they don't seem to like foods with much texture. I read that giving them foods that they really like is the best way to go about getting them started with feeding themselves. So I've tried with chunks of banana and green beans--we're starting with that. They don't put the food in their mouths though, they just play and I end up feeding it to them. They typically take a few bites and then sort of gag on the food--like they just realized they need to chew. It's been slow going.
As for the bottle, I've started feeding them their bottles while they sit in their highchairs. (It was my husband's idea!) That way it's becoming more about eating than about cuddling. They're starting to put their hands on the bottle and, usually, when they're finished, they like to play with the bottle--examine it, turn it up-side down, get it all checked out.
And as a side note, I think it's totally normal to compare the twins--I know we shouldn't, but it's natural. Just like moms of single babies compare their kids to their friends' kids. We just have them in the same house :)
My 10 month old daughter is the exact same way. I think it has more to do with personality than with development though. As long as your son doesn't show any obvious signs of being delayed, it really isn't something to worry about. I know it can be frustrating to have to sit down with the baby to feed him each time, but it also provides time for you to cuddle and bond with him. There are a few things you can do to encourage him to hold the bottle for himself, but make sure you make the transition gradually to make it easier on him. One thing that I've been doing with my daughter is waiting for her to grab the bottle before putting it in her mouth. Once she got that down, I started gently covering her hands with mine as she held the bottle. We've gotten to a point now where she'll hold the bottle for most of the feeding as long as she's still in my lap. It may take a little time to get him to start feeding himself, but be patient and it will happen. Just give him time to experiment with finger foods and gently show him how to hold the bottle himself.
If you didn't have the other son to compare him to, you might think this was normal. What you have here is not two different 'development' ages but to 'emotional' ages. This baby is more of a cuddler and momma's boy. Many of us have had these babies - only one at a time.
Food: I would like to suggest that you leave the room when he is eating so that you don't have the option to feed him. Start by putting something he REALLY likes on his tray and leave for a few seconds (you can watch from around the corner). If he doesn't wind up feeding himself without you around, he is not ready to eat solid food. Let go - he'll eat it when he's good and hungry.
The bottle thing: that's about cuddling. Hold him and hold his bottle until he is ready to do it on his own. He just wants to be held and this is the best time to get held. Let go of what his brother is doing - they are just emotionally different people and always will be.
If you just had one - this one would probably satisfy your need to cuddle a baby more. Why not give in to it? Resist the temptation to compare them and decide which is "better". They are both going to grow their own way.
Read books about twins.
I don't think there is any reason to think that anything is wrong. If all of his other developmental milestones are being met it could easily be he is not ready. I have 4 kids all of which are different, currently my 20 mo. old will not drink anything but water from a cup. She likes her "baba" and I have never been one to worry about whether or not they are holding a bottle at this age I feel is more for the parents benefit than the child. I encourage my children to do all that they can and be independent but they will do it when they are ready not because I am pushing them. They will have enough time in life to worry about people pushing them to hard or just competing with themselves in general.
Welcome to parenthood! All children develope at different rates and it is all OK. You really get to see it first hand having twin. Maybe your kids have two different personalities one might end of more independent and other like to have more one on one interaction with you. My doc always said a when a child was ready they would just do it. Sorry no specific answers, but hope it makes you feel better.
My son was "late" in feeding himself too; I just figured he'd do it when he was ready, until our doctor said it was time (9 months). We figure he was just fine with having us do everything for him and saw no need to change.
To get him to feed himself, we'd put the food (cheerio, etc.) into his hand and move his hand to his mouth. We resisted the temptation to just put it in for him when he complained, so the only way he got finger food was with his own hand. He caught on very quickly and was eating like a champ in no time. Same with the sippy cup, though he never did take to holding his own bottle. I enjoy cuddling with him for that, so it really doesn't bother me (and now that he's 1, he won't be using a bottle for much longer anyway).
Now on to utensils!
It is so good that you are recognizing that babies develop differently!! If his pediatrition says his health is good I would let him decide when he is hungry. Putting out the finger foods on the tray or in a colorful bowl may intice him to "get his own food". It will build his self confidence. He may need more TLC from you and really like that closeness when you give him that bottle. My first two weren't twins but they were 10 months and 3 weeks apart and they, too, were like night and day. The first one needed the extra nurturing, the second one was "Miss Independent" and wanted to "get her own green food". I have 14 kiddos, with 4 still at home. I love to share with others what has worked for me just as suggestions. I also teach children with behavior disorders. Let us know how he progresses.
