10 Month Old Still Wakes up 3 Times a Night to Breastfeed

S.,

It is a little late in the game, but I was given a series of books called "Baby Wise" I started reading them when my daughter was about a month old, and they really helped me to get her to sleep through the night. When it comes down to it, everything they say, just makes sense.

S.,

I feel your pain. My two boys were (are) the same way. My older son rarely slept much more than 6 hours until I weaned him at 15-16 months. My second son is now 14 months and still will regularly wake at night and I usually just let him nurse because it is the fastest, easiest way for everyone to go back to sleep.

That said, what did work well for me when I was trying to my first son to sleep better was this (and I did start it around 10 months with my older son).

1. Let him nurse if he wakes earlier in the evening. My son always woke around 9:30 or 10. I let him nurse then.

2. Cut off the night nursing between the 10:00 p.m. and 5:00 a.m. hours. Try dropping one nursing at a time. I know that this is easy to advise, and I am not going to lie and say it was easy, it was actually REALLY HARD to do. My husband travels a lot for work, so I almost always got up with my son (and still do), so I would just take him to a different room (otherwise he would point at the chair that we nurse in and say "rock rock" and want to nurse) and put him in the baby sling and just walk with him until he finally went back to sleep. This sometimes took an hour or more. BUT, once we went a few nights where he went back to sleep and stayed asleep for a few hours, he did start sleeping between 9:30 or 10:30 and around 4:30 or 5:00 a.m. I would then nurse him when he woke and he would sleep till around 7:30.

3. Start pushing that early morning nursing later if you can. I think the latest we ever made it was around 5:30 or 6:00, but he always went back to sleep then and I could go back to bed.

4. NAP when he does until he starts sleeping better. Let the other house projects go and rest so that you have the resolve to help him get through the night without nursing. It will be hard on everyone, but you can do it.

Good luck! Hopefully he will get to be like my little guy now, who USUALLY just wakes once to nurse... and I let him, because it works for us.

J.

The only thing I have for you is that he might grow out of it soon. My DD woke up 6-12 times a night until she was a year old. We tried EVERTHING to get her to sleep! We had our pediatrician trying to figure it out, we did chiropractics, massage, crying it out, praying(oh, how we prayed!!!) begging, crying(lots of it), I guess you get the picture. One day she just slept. I could hardly believe it! I hope it happens soon for you!

I understand. My son woke up many times during the night while breastfeeding. He did not stop this until I stopped nursing. Have you tried rice cereal at night? We started that when I started to stop nursing. That's how we cut out the before bed nursing. I started to wean him at about 10 1/2 months and he was completely done nursing by the time he was a year. The middle of the night ones where the last to go. Once we got those out he started sleeping through the night. Good luck I hope you can get some sleep soon! :)

Hi S.
By ten months your son should not need to eat in the middle of the night unless he is under weight or has a medical condition that would warrant this. So my question is. Is he falling a sleep himself or does he fall a sleep with the bottle and in your arms. If he falls a sleep on you. he is probably waking up scared and cries for you. I highly recommend the No Cry Sleep Solution Book. In the book she gives a example of if you feel a sleep in your warm cozy bed and woke up on the cold hard kitchen floor you would be scared and wonder how you got there same is true for our little ones. Sorry it was so long. I hope this helps. Good Luck :)T.

I had really great success with the 3-day sleep solution. I found it on-line and bought it in the middle of the night and got access to the electronic copy immediately (the dvd's and pretty packet come a few days later after I didn't need it anymore because she was already sleeping through the night!). It is expensive, $50, but I was desperate and so so so sleep deprived. It laid out an 8-step plan to follow and we did it almost to the letter (I still nurse her before sleep because I want to make sure she still gets lots of that super-human-baby-food at every opportunity - while this did not disrupt or interfere with our process/program it might for someone else) and it worked like a wonderful beautiful charm! The basic premise is that it takes a child about 3 days to break old habits and to adopt new healthier sleep habits - of which they will carry through their entire lives! I really loved the program, it really saved my life! It is clear, concise, and very much made sense right off the bat and it is not a long lengthy book that takes another week to read. I got it that night, and started the next day. My daughter is now a fabulous FABULOUS sleeper :) She might not sleep through the night every single night - but 9 times out of 10 she sleeps from 6 pm - 6 am, plus 2 naps of 1-2 hours! She is now 9 months old. We started when she was 4 months old when she wouldn't sleep more than about a half hour or 40 minutes at a stretch ever. She was completely dependent on me for sleeping, and I knew it. I know it is easier to start it when they are a little younger, but this would still absolutly apply to a 10 mo old, in fact there is additional info in the packet to help older children than that after poor sleeping habits are thoroughly ingrained. Good luck - you'll find something that works!!

I am sorry I have no advice for because my 10 month old still wakes up to nurse at night as well. He slept well til about 6 months old and then he started waking. I know how frusterating it is and I have not clue either on how to help him sleep. I would (as someone else said) not use formula before bed. Your milk is better. I do baby food and cereal and breastmilk daily and he still is up. My lactation consultant suggested that he missed me during they day as I am not home. So he catches up at night, however I see your and at home mom so that is most likely not the case. I am interested in reading what others have to offer. Good Luck

we have the same problem with our 6.5 month old. we've been using ferber's book "solve your child's sleep problems" the last couple weeks. there's a chapter on spacing out night feedings. each night you make them wait a bit longer for the next feeding. you let them cry it out if they wake up sooner, but it's really progressive-waiting not true CIO. so far, we're up to 3-3.5 hours between feedings.

I completely feel your pain...my son is also 10 months and is waking up several times a night to breastfeed. A big switch for me because my daughter was also exclusively breastfed and was a great sleeper. The formula won't make a difference, as you've figured out. And I have never had much luck with the cry it out method. Have you considered cosleeping? I finally just decided that if the only way I can sleep is to have him there with me, than that is just my life for now. I put him to bed after he nurses to sleep at 8 or so, on a good night when he wakes up sometime between 12 and 2 I can usually just nurse him and put him back in his crib. He usually is up within 2 hours again, and that's when he comes into bed with me, if not earlier.

I am a big parenting book reader...and a couple things I read were: I "The Breastfeeding Mother's Companion" there is a section on night waking. It basically says that some babies are waking up for no reason other than a snack and a cuddle.
I think the "no cry sleep solution" has some good advice, but it never worked for my daughter, who nursed to sleep every night until 14 months, and then had a sippy cup of milk or water after that until she was probably 2 1/2 and old enough to rationalize a little bit. Now she is an awesome sleeper. Dr. Sears has a great book, Nightime Parenting.

I guess my point is I wouldn't worry about falling into a routine, and I would try to ignore what everyone tells you about sleeping through the night. I'm sure you've heard that it's strange he's not, and that there is no biological reason for him to be waking, he doesn't NEED to eat. Right? If you had your choice to sleep in a cold cage, or be snuggled all night long, what would you choose? He'll grow out of it, and you will survive!!!

One more thing....do you use any blankets or sleep sacks or anything with him? I have noticed that the nights it's really cold my son wakes up way more, because he gets colder. Try a blanket or sleep sack and see if that helps.

Don't fret! My sons nursed the same way. My oldest till 16 mos through the night and my younger through 12 mos. We tried the cry it out thing at 12 mos with my younger son and it was hard a few nights but he started sleeping then. My husband HAD to be the one to go and put his nuk in though cause if he saw me he would go ballistic. it was a neat way for my hubby to be involved in his nights because up to that time it was always me and my breasts! haha

Hi S.,

I know it's very hard but all of my kids were not very good sleepers at night and nursed a lot during the night until they were one. Funny thing is that my boys were worse at night and they still don't seem to need much sleep and my daughter was better and she is the one who needs her sleep. I just decided that I needed to do what I could to get sleep so they nursed until they weaned themselves of the night feedings. Good luck and definitely nap during the day when they do. You need it!!!!

S.,
I had the same problem with my son. (our first child) so I know exactly what you are going through. He would nurse for only 5 minutes then go back to sleep. I always wondered if it was separation anxiety. Our son didn't sleep through the night until I stopped nursing at 15 months (found out I was expecting) I really don't have a solution for ya except hang in there. I'm a SAHM of 2 adorable children 23 month old son and 4 week old daughter.

Before he goes to bed for the night make sure he has a snack along with the breastfeeding so that he doesn't go to bed hungry. Then when he's breatfeeding don't let him fall asleep while eating for a single moment. Make sure he is awake through the entire feeding. Because if you lay him down in his crib sleeping or halfway sleeping or even in a gragy (sorry can't spell. hehe) state then he won't remember being put in his crib and he won't remember you leaving the room either. Because I bet that once he learns how to go from being completely awake to putting himself to sleep this whole problem with go away. Another thing I would suggest is putting a stuffed animal in the crib with him. Preferably one that plays some music. I have a little horsey that plays music and I have played that stuffed animal for my son every night. And that might sooth and calm your little boy to sleep.

A bottle of formula isn't going to make a difference. Your milk is higher in fat nad will satisfy him just fine. I wouldn't even bother with formula.

Each child is different. my oldest slept 7hrs straight from 5wks old. My youngest woke twice at night to nurse until 10 months old! We never did cry it out, but at 10 months my husband would go in when he woke at 3am and pat his back, give him his blankie, and 'shhhh' him for a bit. He was ok after a day or two, and shortly after gave up the 5am nursing too and started sleeping until 7am.

Also, I nursed both my boys to sleep from birth until we weaned close to 2, and neither had a problem sleeping by themselves, so if you are nursing him to sleep, don't worry about that. It never ever affected either of thier sleeping habits to nurse to sleep.

But have dad go in at night and soothe him. Have him give him a blankie, his lovey, a pacifier, whatever he uses as a lovey. Have him pat his back or rub his tummy and soothe him, shhhh him. Keep the lights off, keep it calm and mellow. My youngest was (and still is) infatuated with this Glo E Bear. Its white, can get a small one at Target for $12. It lights up in different colors, awesome. He would go in, turn that on, and my son would stare at it and drift right back to sleep. IT turns off automatically after 15 mins. Its a neat little thing.

But having your husband go in will make the difference. Give him a few minutes, then send dad in to soothe, then wait a few more minutes, then send dad in again. HE'll get it, it'll take a fw days but it will work. :)
Congratulationso n the breastfeeding. :)

Some babies are just not sleepers. My first child never slept through the night until he was about 3. My second was much better. I now have a 6 month old who still wakes up 2-3 times a night to eat (the one bummer about breastfeeding). Sometimes she is up as many as 5 times. She is on cereal and fruits/veggies and should be sleeping through but she isn't. Just went to the doc yesterday for her checkup and the pediatrician said the same thing. Usually by 6 months babies should be sleeping through the night (which, by the way is defined as 5-6 hours). I'd still discuss it w/ your pediatrician to rule out anything unusual, but as long as he is normal in every other way I would guess he is just not a sleeper. Hope this helps.
On the flip side, my 6 month old is totally good natured and hardly fusses or cries and I will take a non-sleeper to a colicky or cranky baby any day of the week.