11 Month Old Son Suddenly Super Clingy to Mom

Updated on November 05, 2008
D.H. asks from Virden, IL
4 answers

I thought my two girls were as attached to me as any children could be, but I think I am being proved wrong. My son will be 1 in less than 2 weeks and has suddenly developed this need to be with in sight of me, if not in my arms, ALL the time. He will only play if I stay in the same room with him, he follows me from room to room fusing and clinging to my pants. And I spend a LOT of time with him. I'm not big on the whole crying it out method and my husband & I tend to practice the attachment parenting styles, but his need to be with me is so intense. He was the best sleeper of my three until recently. I can not get him to stay in his crib for more than an hour, maybe two. He wakes up (most of the time screaming)and wants to nurse, only I know it is just to be pacified. He has 8 teeth. I know he is working on his teeth, but they don't seem to be too swollen or sore when he is awake. We have been battling some form of a rash on his face. The doctor thinks he is allergic to something, but didn't give me any suggestions on what it could be or where to start. We thought there might have been a connection to chocolate, but that doesn't seem to be it. He has started drinking milk out of sippy cups and I've taken that away too. It has cleared up some, so we are going to see if we change his formula (used only when I am at work) and see if that helps. I know boys are more tied to their moms than girls, but any suggestions for help would be great because I don't feel like I can move without having him glued to me! The other lovely fact is he doesn't do any of these things for my husband during the mornings, he only starts in when I walk in after lunch and continues until I leave for work the next morning. Is it just a phase? And if so, does anyone have any idea how long it will last? If I know there is an end coming, I'm sure I'll handle it better!

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J.P.

answers from Chicago on

It sounds like separation anxiety. My first son got it around 10 months of age and it was a phase that lasted just a few months. I found this article that may help.

http://www.drgreene.com/21_1183.html

I also am more of an attachment parent and I just helped him cope better. I would explain that I was going somewhere and that I would be right back. When he started to cry I would keep talking to him as I walked down the hall etc. I also just let him come with me to the bathroom etc. It is a phase and if you cater to it that isn't a bad thing (your not spoiling him). He needs the reassurance that you will return. It is a very healthy phase that all children go through at differing degrees. You may also want to introduce an item for him to comfort himself, i.e. a lovey. My some is attached to an eoyre doll some kids like blankies etc. Good luck and I know it is tough but IT WILL go away.

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M.R.

answers from Chicago on

I call it, velcro baby or if they're nursing, boob charm.

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J.W.

answers from Chicago on

I just ended the "super clingy" phase with my son. He was older though. For us, it lasted about 2 months. Then suddenly last week, he was back to normal. He might be clinging to you because he doesn't feel well, could be due to the allergy. Dairy is a very common allergy. If you are nursing, try cutting dairy out of your diet too. Maybe ask your pediatrician if Benadryl would be appropriate to give him at night, and what dosage he should receive. Also, he could be getting his molars in. Those take forever to break through and could be bothering him also. There are just so many things that could be causing his behavior. I hope some of this helps. Good luck!

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J.W.

answers from Chicago on

One thing I've done when the "clingy" times come, is to use a backpack carrier. I toss the little guy in there (he just turned 1), and move along.
It works for some general housework/chores - as long as I'm not bending down much - and it's great for cooking/meal times - it frees me (to an extent) and he is with me and able to watch everything going on.
Quite often it seems that after he's spent sometime in there and been "with" me that he is then able to be separate a bit.

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