11Yr Old Ready to Shave?

Don't worry to much. I satarted shaving early as well, I brought it up with my mom first and it was my arm pits first and then my legs. If she is getting hairy and it bathers her then maybe it is time to start shaving. That is why I started shaving. I was ashamed to wear a tank top because of it. So that is when we together thought it would be a good time. I was wearing a size b bra in the third grade to give you an Idea of how fast I hit puperty. Its hard but if the hair bathers her maybe it is time

P.,
First THANK YOU for job you do everyday. My oldest daughter
was the same way, breast and pubic hair by 11. She is now almost 22, this is a great chance for you both to talk about what all of what will come. Be open and very frank, and she will listen, if mom's talk they don't listen to friends.
Best of luck.....M.

My daughter will be turning 12 this year she is a blonde but at 8 she started getting teased even though her hair was really blonde the other girls did notice it. I started out helping her shave at 8 once a week making sure she understood how to do it. I was not very comfortable with her having a razor so we switched to veet it is a hair removal with a fake razor we tested a small spot on her ankle first to make sure she was not allergic then she started shaving like that but she found she liked the razor better after the first can of veet. She has been using a razor since she was 8. there is also several lotions on the market to slow hair growth after shaving. I think in todays society the little girls are growing up quickly and if she is 11 there are already girls wearing a full face of makeup and most of her friends have been shaving for years. OH the razors she likes the best are the once intuition they have the soap around the blades already which saves on cheap flimsy razors and shaving creams.

I don't know that there can be a "wrong reason" to want to shave, altho worrying about safety is a concern. My daughter just turned 13 and about a year earlier told me someone made fun of her hairy legs. It can take just 1 comment from someone to really affect their self esteem in these years, as you can probably remember when you were 11 or 12. I got my daughter an electric one, it's harder to cut yourself with them and the new ones can be used in the shower or dry. She started with her armpits and then graduated to her legs when school started again. I think the right age is when they start to feel self-conscious about it and want to. I had wanted mine to wait till 13 for no good reason but realized that didn't make sense and let her start earlier. She only shaves the lower leg and armpits.
K.

Dear P.,

You need to step up and walk right beside her, if she thinks that she has hair on her legs and wants to shave them, then get her a very nice electric razor - pink. You need to take this hint that you have an independent little lady on your hands and it is better to be on her side than against her. Eleven nowadays is farrrrr more mature than we were, especially in my time - I am a gr grandmother now. You want to stay close and so what if she shaves her legs.

What is it they say now? Don't sweat the small stuff, this is just the beginning, and you don't want to scare her from confiding in you. O.K.?

Come on Dad, you too. Sincerely, C. N.

I really dont think your daughter is to young to be shaving her legs. Girls are growing up much faster these days. You said she is 11 most 11 yr olds are in 6th grade? Thats when most girls shave. It is embarrassing to have hairy legs when all your friends have hairless legs. I know I was in that position when I was younger I couldnt shave till I was 13. I did it anyway and yes got in trouble. If you think she is doing it for the wrong reason talk to her about it. I think if you tried to stop her she will find a way to shave anyway. Life at this age is so crazy for them. What they need is for their parents to talk to them. There is enough you are going to get upset about and have fights about. Shaving shouldnt be one of them. Good Luck.

If you can barley see the hair on her legs, she doesn't need to shave. It's a different world out thier for our young girls. Peer pressure is a nightmare. She may be getting teased or her friends may be shaving.

Yes, you should have the lil woman talk with her. She may have hair in othe places. As females our bodies go through so much.
AND....her peers may already be discussing things that you would never think of. My daughter is now 14 and telling all kinds of garbage her friends talk about and has talked abput since the 4th grade. Are children are often exposed to things at school before we are ready. So, YES....talk, listen, ask and discuss everything. Even if it hurts to hear it.
Good luck
S.... I have a 14 yo. and I hope she tells me everything.(wishful thinking?)

Rather than give advice, I have a GREAT book recommendation for your daughter, it is The Big Book of Girl Stuff, by Bart King and his five sisters. My daughter has read it cover to cover more than once.(Cute cover even, it reverses to look like a text book.) Very practical, while still treating the girls as GIRLS- not small teens. Pg. 210 and 211 cover shaving, the how to's and even why we shave in our culture. Other chapters discuss body image and self image.
With school starting, you may want to ask your daughter if someone teased her about her body hair. I taught 6Th grade before kids, and I know at this age the girls are very aware of each other's changing bodies and some can be unbelievably harsh with their comments.

Just because you don't notice it doesn't mean her friends don't. I remember when I was that age and my friends made fun of me because I wasn't allowed to shave my legs. My mom made me wait till I was 12. Sit down and talk to her. Ask her why she wants to shave her legs. Don't tell her when you started shaving your legs cause she probably won't care. You could try nair or something like that if you don't feel comfortable with her shaving.

I know it's hard when these things start to happen, but it's going to be o.k.. My daughter, who is now 18, started shaving at 11 also. She started puberty early as well and even though you could not see much hair it was very "prickly". What I mean is it grew straight out and it was course. If your daughter is that far advanced I would say let her shave. I would suggest a Venus Razor, they are a bit expensive but not disposable, you just change the head. Or they have some now that have the shaving cream right in the razor, those are great too. If you just don't make it a big deal it will be fine. I know it's hard, but if you do this together it will be wonderful.

Hope I was of some help,
Kathy Alvis

I would say it's no big deal. But you should talk to her about puberty now, and also about vanity. I mean if you fear it is for the wrong reasons, then let her know she's beautiful regardless of hair or not. But 11 is prime time for a talk and buying razors and deodorant for her. And she'd probably like a training bra too, but might be afraid to ask. I started showing signs of puberty at 10 and needed a bra but didn't ask for one until I was about to start junior high. This is also a great opportunity for mother/daughter bonding. Do all this for her now, and with her, and she might be more willing to share with you when she gets older as a teen.

It's not unusual for young girls to start thinking about these things, especially with all the advertising they are exposed to. you absolutely should talk to your daughter about what to expect as a woman and what changes her body will be going through. Puberty happens earlier and earlier and at 11, she may start her period pretty soon and hair growth will soon follow.

Ask her if she has tried to shave (don't be angry with her) and then talk to her about why she thinks she needs to. A friend may have said something about shaving, someone may have teased her about hair, you never know and should get to the root of the concern first. If she is getting hair and wants to learn to shave, let her know you are willing to help her and teach her and get her razor of her own. I told my daughter at this age that it's best not to start too soon as the hair grows back in heavier and coarser and it may be best to wait until it starts getting heavier and darker on its own. I bought her a feminine razor (Gillette Venus) in a color she liked and some pretty scented shave cream and taught her how to shave and talked to her about being careful holding the blade properly so as not to cut herself. My daughter was almost 14 when she started shaving, but had friends who started earlier. I think it depends on the girls hair coloring and just her body in general. Each girl is different. Most importantly let her know you are willing to help her if she has questions about anything and that you are the best resource. Be supportive and understanding, but let her know that peers and advertisers don't always give the best advice!

Happy Shaving!
P. A

Dear P.,
Or perhaps, dear 32 year old mom with lots of energy...who is a very active role model for her eleven year old daughter... You must have been a precocious young woman yourself. With all of the things that you are engaged in it is not surprising that your daughter has a bigger picture of the world and is exploring it.

Sometimes things like shaving represent a heightened awareness of self. Not a bad thing. Children are so unique in the latency stages of life and they come to some interesting conclusions about life. I still carry a scar on my right leg from the exploration of shaving (ouch)at her age. You might ask her how her vision of the world is shaping up these days and who she sees herself in it.

My grandson is turning eleven this month. He is 5'2" and 115 pounds. His body is bigger than his mind can grasp. He is a football player and inside a gentle and engaging boy. He is struggling with all of the changes and bumps into lots of things. He at times gets angry and out of sorts. Talking to him about how it feels to grow so fast and looking at other creatures who are "large within the system" gives him some perspective. Then we can laugh at some of the oops moments.

This is a rapid, disconnected and stressful world. Kids are finding many ways to embrace it that might look odd or advanced to us. How we stay aware and in touch with them while they explore their inner process can make the journey more meaningful and less confusing.

Shaving has always been a very refreshing and renewing tradition for me. The smoothness is calming and I feel good afterward. Eleven is an aware and amazing time for some kids. She might be on that road. You might want to shave together and hang out on the edge of the tub and have some "girl talk" time.

Peace, C.

I think when to start shaving depends on several things. If she is hairy or her hair is dark. Then I would say let her shave. If she has light hair I would say no. My daughter is only 6. I have noticed that her legs are getting hairy and changing from blonde to black/brown. I am sure she will be shaving by 11. I am not hairy and have light colored leg hair so I didn't shave at 11. My son is 14 and started shaving at 11. My kids are western European with native american. So my 14 yr old has light skin w/black hair. I felt the same as you, I thought it was a little young. Kids mature at different rates. but we went to visit my parents out of state and they were like "It's time" We went out and bought him and electric shaver. He's been shaving ever since. There were kids in my sons 8th grade last year that hadn't had to start shaving yet. Then there's others who need to start at 11.
I feel for you!
K.

I have fair skin and dark hair and shaved my legs around this age. I had a friend who's mother made her wait until 14 or 15 for some horrible reason and she was incredibly hairy. She was teased endlessly in school, and her life was pretty miserable because of it.

I agree w/Kristie,it depends on the situation.I started shaving in sixth grade (11) because I simply could not stand the feel of hair rubbing in my jeans,still cant!My little cousin (13) started at 11 also,we bought her an electric shaver.Remember peer presure at this age is very strong,talk to her and ask why shes ready.Its a tough decision to let your little girl grow up and with my cousin living with me it only gets harder!Make-up is next!good luck.I worked in a teen retail store for 3 yrs,11 is not what it used to be.....

yes let her shave i growing up began my developement very early also(about third grade) my mom explaned everthing to me about changes. i got boobs in the third grade and armpit hair. i got made fun of horrible by the other children about my hairy pits and legs. that when my moth sat me down and explained. she taught me how to shave and no one had a reson to make fun of me anymore but when my boobs came in more that is a whole differnt story

Dear mom, My mother did not tell me things about growing up either and I think it is harder on the child. Please, Please talk to your daughter..even if she doesn't have hair on her yet she will know that she is becoming a young lady. While you are talking about shaving I would sit down with her and ask her if she wants to know anything about becoming a woman. Hope I have helped you. D.