I'll be honest and give you my very strong opinion on this matter. The talk needs to happen. My son is 10 and has asked questions. I am very open with him, and though I don't go into detail about everything, he knows the basics, and he also knows alot of the risks. THe way I see it, if they're old enough to ask, they're old enough to know. But you are the one who can judge on what to elaborate on. I wasn't taught anything, I never had the talk, even though my mom thought I did. Her talk to me was "DON'T do it!" And that was it. I was pregnant at 14. I didnt' know anything about anything and was told "don't", so as a teenager, I rebelled and found out for myself, the hard way. So I am very open with my kids and because of that, my son is very open with me and comes to me with any questions he may have about anything at all. As he gets older, he'll want to more details of coarse and I'll try to be as decent as I can but I'd prefer him finding out all the truths from me, and my husband than from learning on his own. Your son is 12 and is in that very curious stage, so I suggest getting a couple books, I have a few, and reading thru them and then sitting down and asking him what thinks about it all and let him ask you a bunch of questions. And you shouldn't feel uncomfortable about it, you want him to be comfortable talking with you too. It's natural for boys to be curious at that age, we just have to learn as parent how to guide them. Tricky stuff, lol. I wish you all the best luck. I must say, this sounds very similar to what's going on with my 14 year old brother and my cousin's 15 year old son. They also sneak on the computers too. But my mom doesn't talk to my brother the same way she didn't talk to me. Ya can't tell her anything, I swear.