15 Month Old Not Sleeping Through the Night.

I believe in attachment parenting, but due to my busy work life I haven't been able to adapt the model completely, so I "hybridized" it to suit the family lifestyle. I have never bought into the CIO philosophy for any reason. There is no study proving this, but I fear it may create or foster anxiety in children. I wonder if they are thinking "why isn't my mom coming for me even when I am crying for her?" I just don't like it. Despite all of the advice I was given I allowed my son to sleep in our bed (or in a co-sleeper) almost all his life. For a while, I buckled under peer pressure and tried to break the habit, but nothing worked. At one point I wondered "why am I doing this? Did I really NEED to break this habit?" I eventually concluded that I would allow myself some discomfort if it made my little guy happier. Finally, I just stopped trying to break the sleep-with-mommy habit and allowed him to sleep wherever he wanted, and oddly, THAT worked! At one point, I tried letting him fall asleep in our bed and moving him after he was fast asleep. He never noticed the move and would not wake up scared or anything. He seemed OK with it. Now, I rock him to sleep in my arms in a chair in his room and then transition him to the crib. He is still OK with this - only at times crying when something is bothering him (like a soaked diaper that he wants changed right away). Otherwise, even after he wakes up he plays peacefully in his crib until I get him. What I learned is that the less anxiety I create about sleeptime, the more amenable he was to sleeping alone. And if I don't have to go to work the next day, I just let him sleep in our bed for the night. It does not work for every family, but it works for ours. Good luck.

Hi J.,
If he's in the habit of coming into your bed, then you've created that habit by allowing him there. I have no issues against family bed, we certainly had the kids in our bed at times when they were young. Rather than a CIO method, I would look to teach him some self soothing. If he takes a binky, leave them in the crib, leave him a stuffed toy that makes music, rather than bringing him into your bed, just speak quietly to him, pat him a bit. If mom always goes in to him, send dad - the break in routine might help him to change his pattern.
Good luck

Hi J.,

We just went through the same thing. Our son started sleeping in our bed when he was about 7 months. He was cuddly at 1st and we loved having him in there with us...but after he turned one he started to kick and slap and we weren't getting any sleep.

It killed us to let him CIO. It took us less than a week to have him stay in his crib by doing this:
I'm always the one to go in when he cries so the first time I tried to put in him his crib instead of taking him to our bed there was no way that he was going down if he saw me so my husband went in.

There was a lot of crying but my husband sat in the room with him so we didn't feel like we were abandoning him. I watched on the monitor. Every time he stood up in his crib, my husband would lay him on his belly with his pacifier and say go to sleep Michael and pat his back until he stopped crying. (without picking him up unless he was hyper ventilating) This went on the 1st night for about an hour or 2.

The next night I went in and did the same exact thing. I broke and rocked him to sleep 2 times that night. The crying was less.

The 3rd night I did not pick him up this time got a blanket and layed on the floor by his crib and put my hand in between the bars and held his hand.

The 4th night I got the blanket layed down by the crib while he was standing up. Tapped my hand on the mattress and said put your head down. I kept tapping my hand and he just layed his head on my hand and slept on it. I had to wait a while before I could leave the room without him hearing me.

For the next week I did the same thing...until I felt like my hip was broken from sleeping on the floor. After 2 or 3 weeks. i would still have to lay by his crib every now and again but I could lay for 10 minutes and go.

We started the routine the Tuesday after Labor Day and by Sept. 26 I just had to go in once a night and tap my hand on the mattress. Not much crying at that point.if any at all. By Oct 1, he was sleeping through most nights. He just turned 18 mo. on 10/18/09 and he's sleeping very comfortably in his own crib and we were sleeping too.

YOU CAN DO IT! I thought I would never get him in his crib. good luck!

also, search this phrase on mamasource. It was the question that has some good advice too.

"Help with baby sleeping in own crib"

Read what some sleep experts have to say:

http://bit.ly/2qtCr

On a weekend or whenever you dont have to get up early, tell him he has to sleep in his bed, not yours. Then when he cries just lay him down and pat his back till he relaxes and do not talk to him. Those night lights that spin different colors or shapes are very soothing and soft music or 'white noise' also helps.I am not a fan of CIO, since bedtime should be a pleasurable experience, not a battle of wills, for infants and toddlers. 3 or 4 year olds are playing power games and need to CIO. Above all if you no longer want him in your bed, do not let him, ever. Even for naps or snuggle time. Make your room and bed off limits, for a year or 2 until he very used to sleeping alone.

what about setting up a sleeping bag on the floor.. my daughter did this for a while.. i would show her how to get in on the floor.. after about 2 weeks.. i slowly moved the sleeping bag away from our bed.. another week i moved it further ... until it was in the hall way.. then finally in her room.. guess what.. she is 11 and still sleeps on the floor.. i guess its not the worse thing.. she loves sleeping on the floor.. not sure what will happen when she gets married someday... she literally doesn't sleep in her bed at all.. it's probably been about 6 years since she slept in any type of bed... hopefully she will have a great back form sleeeping on the floor.. she loves it..