17 Month Old Biting

Hi T.,

I worked in a daycare right out of college. I cared for two-year-olds for 1 1/2 years. The director of the day care would put the child in a high chair and give him/her a washcloth he/she was supposed to chew on.

My mom did what April L did. I never bit anyone ever again - according to Mom.

I like what Kris S said about finding what the triggers are. Is it for attention, is it sensory overload, is he just learning appropriate social behavior. I like all of what Kris S said.

If it is just for attention or learning social behavior try the high chair and wash cloth along with what you are saying. I like saying what you want him to do instead, also. Have the day care do the same thing you are doing. We were always happy to do what the parents wanted (with in reason). I would also find out what they are doing with the other kids who bite. If they don't follow through I would find another day care. Maybe a home daycare with fewer kids.

Good luck!

Our first son was a biter and we used vinegar on his tongue when he bit. We would just touch our finger in the bottle and then touch it on his tongue and say "no bite." It nipped it in the bud very quickly. Some people use listerine too but our son wasn't fazed by it. Good luck!

I guess I would wonder what they are doing at daycare to nip it in the bud there. At home, I gave time outs for biting and that helped.

Hi T.,

I read your other post, and know that a lot of parents do use vinegar for disciplinary problems these days, and it does seem to help...the only problem I see with it is there are times that they know you don't have it with you, and children are so smart. BUT if you nip it in the bud, right at first, this shouldn't be a problem. I would also make sure that the daycare is really taking some disciplinary action. It's not going to help your child if they are just saying, "oh, well".

C.

I have a different take on this. At 17 months a child is trying to figure out how to communicate his wishes and feelings. In the barely controlled chaos that is most daycare toddler rooms it can be tough to help each child develop the skills they need (takes a LOT of repetition). You have the right idea with saying "No bite!" but then add something that is okay for the child to do. For my son biting us was usually a call for attention so we would say "No bite, biting hurts mommy. I like kisses instead."

The other time my son bit was when he was overstimulated by the environment (leading cause when he was at daycare). Unfortunately his day care workers didn't figure this out. They just created more stress for him by making him do time outs in a punitive way rather than addressing the situation of kids bumping him, grabbing his stuff or the general noise level. They ended up just adding to his stress levels rather than helping him calm down. I eventually had to pull him out of there and then the next year we figured out that he had sensory processing disorder and through OT developed some strategies that really helped him. If I had put vinegar on his tongue it would have just added to his sensory overload.

As a parent, you need to take a hard look at the triggers and then work toward positive remedies that support him emotionally and help him communicate and understand his own needs better.

I hope you get some more advice from people! My 17 month old son is a biter and I am very upset by it. So far he has only bit me and his 4 year old brother, but he'll be going to a nursery class at church soon and I am so afraid of him biting the other kids! So far I have tried telling him "no biting! Biting gives owies!" and I tell him to give me high fives instead. I noticed my son bites when he is bored, mad, or frustrated. I can't carry him in a back carrier anymore because he bites me on the shoulder or back because he gets too bored. Good luck! I know that biting is a serious problem and I'm trying to stop it before it gets worse.

to be honest, it's probably another phase. My son, 17 mos, has been bit, and bitten. Daycare has told me it is not uncommon at this age as they learn how to deal with their emotions. We usually do the "ow that hurts, that's not nice" and redirect his attention to something else to help him get his energy out. It is rare if he does it now, and again, only if he gets really wound up.