1St Grader Struggling with School.

Updated on September 26, 2009
S.M. asks from Poplar Grove, IL
9 answers

Hi moms! I have a friend who's first grader is already struggling with school, and Mom is afraid he may not pass the year. My own oldest son struggled with school when he as little, and I hate to see her and her son go through this. Is the school obligated to provide a tutor to kids who need extra help? I am trying to remember how this all works. Should she consider having the school "test" him already? There may be some attention issues as well, but her main concern is that he is not doing well on any of his work, and she is having a hard time getting him to go over it with her at the end of each day. What help is the school obligated to offer?

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D.N.

answers from Chicago on

I agree. Talk to the teacher first. My daughter had a bit of a rough time when she transferred from Catholic school to public school. I met with the teachers and the school social worker. There were things we changed at home and the teacher made some changes as well. It helped tremendously. We never did go through testing. My daughter has a little trouble staying focused but gets As and Bs.

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L.A.

answers from Chicago on

I would check with the teacher. Some kids need the extra help in which case an IEP ( Individual Education Plan) can be set up for the child. If it is just needing extra help in reading our school has teachers that help kids with that.

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K.N.

answers from Chicago on

Stephanie,
I am a special education teacher. I specialize in the areas of k-2nd grade although I work with students through 8th grade, I also teach grad school. I want to clarify things for you. First the school isn't obligated to provide a tutor. The school should also have a Response to Intervetion program also known as RtI. That is where teachers provide differentiated instruction to their entire class based on the needs of students. As a parent you can at anytime request an evaluation, however, without data supporting interventions that the teachers involved with your child has provided, if none has been attempted, then intervention will probably be put into place before any sort of testing takes place. Even if your child is evaluated for services, doesn't mean he will qualify. Basically there need to be a discrpency between ability (IQ) and performance in order to prove there is a learning disabilty. Even though this isn't your child, it is important for parents to be schooled themselves on what the schools obligations are as well as how the special education process works.If you would like anymore specific information, feel free to email me.
Good luck,
K.

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A.M.

answers from Chicago on

I'm a teacher and when kids aren't progressing , the first person I look at is myself. Many teachers have a one size fits all mentality. He may have a different learning style than his classmates. I wouldn't get him tested yet because it's still early in the year. Many children develop at a slower rate than their peers.

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D.K.

answers from Chicago on

Hi Stephanie.

Boy have I been there! I have found most kids struggle with organizational skills, and a lot have attention issues stemming from food allergies & lagging nutrition. I don't mean that as any slight on your friend, just sharing what I've learned raising an ADHD boy who was only on meds 3 years of his school career.

I would honestly suggest having his allergies tested if attention is an issue. My son is allergic to cornstarch, which is in EVERYTHING processed. I had to start feeding him old-school oatmeal, which we dressed up in fun ways starting with chocolate chips & peanut butter. For lunch I had to do a lot of homework on breads then treats, etc. Thank God he only ever wanted a pb&j! That was easy. Then dinner I had to do a lot more cooking and less opening. I had to grow up and cook, mind I was a very young mom and had married a single dad so at 21 I had to figure this all out, which is why I said grow up and cool. :)

I would definitely tell the mom to check out Flylady.net. That is a great, FREE, organization mentor. She helped me tons & tons. She also has student planners you can download. But the thing with ADD is that they need organization & lists. This group helps with that. There are tons of testimonials about how this group has helped with kids' add.

Also, making sure the kids sit down right after school, with a snack, to do their homework really really helps. They come home with the stuff in their head. If they do the work while it's fresh, there is less of an issue of forgetting how to do things. If they put it off until 6 or 7 then they're struggling to remember what the math formula was and how to do it. I know this child is in 1st Grade but that's his future, too.

That said, the school will have resources to help as well, I just wanted to address the home stuff. And maybe it would help if she did have him tested for add, but I really have come to believe that ADD is a symptom of something else. I'd check allergies & home habits first. My guy wouldn't grow or gain any weight on his meds. He was in 5th grade & still weighed 60 lbs, which he'd weighed for THREE YEARS!! I was so freaked out by this, plus when he "came down" from the medicine he was scary with huge pupils, and really spacey expressions. I hated that! But he decided on his own to not take the medicine. I overhauled our nutrition, etc. And he did a lot better. He was no academic, but he did graduate. Also, I have found people with ADHD just do better in vocations rather than sitting in a classroom. My boy is now 19 and serving in the Air Force. He graduated in the top 5 in his class for fire safety. He loved classes because they were hands-on & fast. Part of add is that the kids are super bright & get bored in normal classrooms! My husband was the same, gave up on school early because he was always bored & when he did do classwork they thought he had cheated. So there are many variables. I hope all this has helped in some way.

D.

J.S.

answers from Chicago on

If he's struggling with reading, he should be enrolled in the school's Title 1 program. It's a part of No Child Left Behind. That program helped my girls become excellent readers quickly.

Your friend should schedule a conference with his teacher to address her concerns and work out some type of plan.

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L.N.

answers from Chicago on

I agree with the other mommie contributors. Do gather all the data necessary and definitely speak to the teacher first. The earlier you are able to help your child the greater the chance for future success.

Keep in mind, however, the chidren go through different stages and that our assesment if naturally biased. I thought my child needed was not at level and wanted to provide more help. Instead I ended up frustrating him before speaking with his teacher. When I spoke with his teacher she told me that he was a very bright boy and he was above level. The problem that she was that he was a chatterbox. She recommended lots of positive reinforcement to get him to focus on completing his homework assignmets (giving him a ticket to play video games, a sticker, computer time, etc. after completing his work).

Good luck!

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M.R.

answers from Chicago on

The very first thing she should do is set up an appointment to meet with the teacher face-to-face. After all, the teacher is the person who is with the student day in and day out, not to mention they have the connections within the school and likely know the procedure for referral.

There really is no need, at this point, to investigate outside options UNTIL the mom has had a chance to speak with the teacher. She might find that the teacher has several helpful and viable options. If, however, the parent is dissatisfied, then she may wish to pursue other options.

Go through the teacher first. A vast majority of teachers really are the child's second-best advocates (after the parents) and can do a great job of building a support team around the student.

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J.C.

answers from Chicago on

She should talk to the teacher, and find out from the principal if the school has a Response to Intervention program. That's a program that gives help to kids who don't have an IEP.

An IEP can be great, BUT your friend should learn as much as she can about how the process works in her school and district (see if there's a local special ed association or group - they will be very familiar), and as much as she can about her son's learning issues, before she pursues that (unless the school recommends - they won't, unless they expect that a learning disability may be an issue.) The school does have to initiate the IEP process, including testing, if the parent requests it and there's any reason it might be indicated.

But, the IEP testing can only be repeated every 3 (I think) years. So you don't want to start the process unless you have a pretty good idea what you want to get out of it. I personally wouldn't expect the tests they do to answer all of the mom's questions and if I were her, I would, if at all possible, look to private testing first to gather information.

Also, the school may find issues, but unless they're technically "learning disabilities," or there is a known disability (ADHD may or may not count), they don't have to provide IEP services.

For more information on the details of the federal law (IDEA), wrightslaw.com is an excellent resource.

Response to Intervention info: http://www.isbe.state.il.us/pdf/rti_state_plan.pdf

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