2 1/2Yo Waking up for up to 3 Hrs in Middle the Night!

Hi P., Children go thoug different sleep paterns. The reason mommy no one is sleeping is because, the first time you went to him when he woke up for him was enough to create a habit, he will continue to wake up and cry, because he knows somone will be coming into him, and now he expects it. At 2 1/2 i would take him out of the crib, I was wondering what he does if he has to go potty at night? I started my tot's on their crib mattress on the floor, when they first came out of the crib, this was at the age of 19 20 months old, so they could go potty at night if they had to. The waking up I would not worry about, but I would stop going in to him. Hope this helps. J.

Your little guy is in a stage of disequilibrium - he is off-kilter because his mind and body are focused on mastering new tasks. What he is feeling is not dissimilar to the anxiety an adult feels when starting a new job.

Make sure his routine is very predictable, frontload (tell him what is going to happen before each outing/activity); acknowledge his frustration when expressed; start the bedtime routine at 6:30pm and have him in bed by 7pm. I suspect he is waking because his mind is working so hard and he is so tired that he cannot calm himself.

Good luck,
C.

Dear P.,
I am afraid it is the naps during the day. A short nap will do. Not all children keep taking long naps as they start to mature. If he sleeps that long during the day, he definitely will not sleep through the night. His sleep pattern has gotten off a bit. Put him to bed at the same time every night if possible and get him up from his naps, even if he wants to sleep longer. His sleeping pattern at night will improve. I am speaking from experience. It is hard to give up that nap time, but you will all sleep better at night. Hope this helps some.

E.:)

Hi P.,

I saw a lot of great responses out there, but I just wanted to check and see if maybe your son might have any health issues going on that you can tell? It seems like after 2 weeks something obvious would pop up, so perhaps not. I just wanted to throw the idea out there just in case. Most of the time if my son (he turned two in early Feb) is having waking issues at night, or a hard time falling asleep, he is dealing with something that's making him uncomfortable. For example, we've had problems for the last week and 1/2 with his sleep and yesterday I just noticed that one of his back molars is cutting through. He also just developed a cold so he's been having trouble breathing.

But on the other hand, if there doesn't seem like anything physical is going on, like some other moms have said, it could be a transitioning thing with his naps. My son started losing his nap around 2 (and I'm still in denial about it). His doctor said it was just a phase, but it's been a couple of months of almost no naps (I still put him down for one, but he just plays and uses the time to poop instead of sleep). Maybe on a day when he doesn't nap much you could try putting him down early again and see what happens? I can often still get 12-13 hours of sleep out of my son if I put him down before 7. But, he won't nap. Just quiet time. I've debated putting him down later to get less sleep and maybe I'll be able to get naps back, but I've been scared to do that because I'm afraid he'll just get overtired and still not nap. I figure as long as he's still taking quiet time without much fuss, at least I'm still getting a break, and him going to bed early gives me a break at night, too, before I have to go to bed.

Whatever happens, remember that this too shall pass and we're all sending positive thoughts your way for more sleep for everyone!

I think maybe he could use some more time outside getting exercise, later in the day after naptime.

My son is also 2 1/2 and doing some of the same things your little boy is doing. Sometimes at night he'll be awake until 10pm. Then he wakes at his normal time and is getting 2 hours less sleep than normal. I found that my son was getting his 2 year molars. They take a long time to grow in so they seem to affect him at different times. I still think my son needs a nap as well. He sleeps anywhere from 1 1/2 to 3 hours. I would say it's a phase and he'll grow out of it. My son did this for a few weeks and now he's pretty much back to his normal schedule. Actually he's been sleeping in until 8 some days. His usual wake time is 7 sometimes 6:45. Things change so often. If your boy is healthy, which it sounds like he is, then all is good.
A.

Have you thought about getting rid of the crib? My 2.5 year old started having weird moments where she woke up upset, didn't want to sleep and tried to climb out of her crib. I saw a posting on Mamasource and many moms recommended getting rid of the crib. As soon as we turned it into a toddler bed, everything was great. She can now get up at night if she gets scared, but rarely does. It worked for us!

is it possible he is outgrowing his nap? my kids after 2 1/2 wouldn't go to sleep until very late if they had a nap and would be cranky the next day. i stopped the nap and gave them earlier bedtimes (7pm). worked like a charm. good luck!

Ditto Carolyn G.
At this age, many times, a child gets hiccups in their sleep. It's all developmental based.
At each age juncture, this can happen.
Both my kids went through this too, at about the same age and at about 1 years old as well.

It is a phase and will pass. BUT keep to your regular routines of nap and bedtime, and your SAME pre-nap and pre-bedtime routines. Consistency is important.

When he wakes in the middle of the night.... just keep things "boring"...ie: don't turn on any lights, don't "wake" fully... just repetitiously say "sleep..." just let him be unless he is crying or distraught, keep things mellow and quiet.

Its "growing pains" which is not easy for them either, and not easy for us either. But, "sleep" is NOT static in kids anyway... and for various developmental phases, it does change, even if temporarily.

Next, there will be wakings due to night-mares, teething, separation anxiety (which still does occur), and them just being lonely at night and wanting to be near you.

He DOES still need a nap... but "over-tired" kids actually have a harder time sleeping and wake more. He's "cranky" because he is actually tired. But kids don't have the ability to think ahead at this age, and so they won't "know" that they NEED a nap.

Also as they hit "milestones" they often get tweaked in their sleep too.

My son, is 2.5 years old too, and he still naps sometimes twice a day... but at night, he NEEDS to "un-wind" before bed... and he has a routine to un-wind which can take at least 1/2 hour. We just make things quiet and dark, turning off the lights, and keeping things mellow.... and then he likes to turn off the lights himself, and have his own flashlight... and then he plays with it and tosses and turns...then he falls asleep. If need be, then I also lay with him.

No, he is not ready to give up his naps. This is just a phase. For naps, you need to go day by day... I don't believe in taking it away COMPLETELY... yet. At this age, they still need it. So you have to gauge him and observe his cues. A toddler isn't just going to tell us "Mommy I'm going to nap now..." and then do so. At least try and get him to nap one time during the day, even if the timing of it may vary from your normal nap time.

My son, will not last or be "happy" if he does not nap. And he actually gets more "hyper" without proper sleep or naps. "Over-tired" kids sometimes actually do get more hyper the more tired they are. So, I still put him down for naps and sleep as consistently as possible.

It just takes time. He's normal. BUT, I would not turn it into a "battle." It can be repetitive, but it will pass.

All the best,
Susan

My son has had some difficulty getting to sleep and sometimes sleeping through the night. We cut out his afternoon nap and he has not had a problem. Sometimes he does need a short afternoon nap, though. But, 1.5 hrs may be more than your little guy needs.

he could be in a grow spurt. that always makes my daughters sleep off. actually thinking about it shes also waking up some nights. just last night she woke up for about an hour at 3a. i only go in her room if she crys. this is normal and it will pass. good luck!

Hi, P.!
I have all boys, now 8, 12 and 19.
When I went through what you are now going through, here's what helped me. I limited the naps to only 2 hours. I went in and turned on lights, scooped him out of bed and sat in my rocker with him for a few minutes, reassuring him that it was time to wake up now, etc. Then, it was time to move to a brighter room like the kitchen for snack and an activity. After nap, we usually had to get ready to go pick up brother(s) at school, etc. Limiting the naptime really helped regulate nighttime sleeping! Programming for success, etc.
Best,
C.

Put him down for his nap earlier, like 1130am. He should wake up a bit early. I had to adjust my oldest's routine because of this kind of thing. He now naps around 1115am actually and wakes up anywhere between 1 and 2, normally around 130pm. That way he has a nice long stretch in the afternoon. I feed him lunch before his nap. It's early at 11am but it works. He wakes up at 6 to 630 in the morning so he eats an early breakfast. I also make sure to take him outside in the morning around 8 or 9 for at least an hour if I can. He goes down between 730 and 8 at night, depending on how tired he is. If putting you little one down earlier works then do it regularly. He's overtired right now. Get his bedtime routine started early and have him in bed by 730. He should not wake up at 4am. If he does remind him that it's still dark outside and that he can call you when it's light and to lay down until then. He may fall back asleep, he may not, but he has to now that 4am is not ok. I would give in at 5am (hell but I would) but 4am is still the middle of the night