20 Month Old Will Not Drink Milk

Updated on October 20, 2008
D.H. asks from Saint Clair, MO
25 answers

My 20 month old daughter will not drink milk. I have tried adding chocolate and strawberry flavoring. I have also tried not offering other drinks. Please help.

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V.M.

answers from Kansas City on

AHHH, then she must know something most people don't...you don't need milk! I know we've all grown up with the deception that we can only get calcium through dairy. She may be a bit young to enjoy tofu, salmon, bok choy or collard greens, BUT does she like brocolli, peas, spinach or baked beans? Also, try 1 cup of Orange Juice calcium fortified. Not too much juice because of all the sugar. All are rich in calcium. I also supplement my kids with a great Calcium Plus product. It tastes great and I mix it with their regular kids vitamins. The products are powder, mix with water and drink. You can read more information on Calcium Plus at www.marketamerica.com/2bewell
Take care,
V.

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C.F.

answers from Kansas City on

My 20 month old girl will only drink milk with Vanilla Carnation Instant Breakfast. That way she gets some extra protein and vitamins too. I have started phasing it out of her milk by not adding as much to her cup.

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C.M.

answers from Kansas City on

My 20 month old has only resently started drinking milk. I agree that you shouldn't push it. As long as she is eating other dairy products (cheese, yogurt, etc.) she is getting the nutrients she needs. My daughter started drinking milk out of my cup. I drink A LOT of milk (can't drink much else when I am pregnant) and she would ask for drinks from my cup when she was learning how to drink from a cup. She didn't care that it was milk because it was what Mommy was drinking. She also saw me drinking the milk out of my bowl when I was finished with my cereal in the morning and started doing that too. Now, she drinks it without any problems. It is not her favorite beverage but she will drink it.

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J.S.

answers from St. Louis on

I had this problem when I was weaning my 1 year old. He is 15 months now and does drink it now (with a little chocolate that I am gradually taking out). But when I talked to my peditrician about it she said kids need the calcium and as long as he was getting that from yogurt, cheese, etc. then he was fine. She told me 3-4 servings per day. I would ask your peditrician if you think she is not getting enough calcium. Good luck!

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B.A.

answers from Kansas City on

This sounds very familiar, only my son did like the strawberry flavoring (finally!). While we were trying to find something he liked, we fed him lots of yogurt, pudding, and cheese. Whatever we could find that had calcium in it, we tried. Good luck! Kids sure can be stubborn when they don't like something.

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T.M.

answers from Kansas City on

I know this will probably sound wrong to some, but I'm not sure I would make her drink milk if she doesn't want it. I found that I was allergic when I was in my 30's and now its hard to avoid milk. I used to love milk, but after not drinking it I don't like it so well. My daughter got a stomach ache at school every day at lunch time (we had her stop milk in the morning and things went back to normal).
I worked at a day care where a little boy was falling asleep all the time, his mother found him asleep in the driveway one day, and the doctor found that he was sensitive to milk and took him off it and he was a different child! Another mom heard her story and experimented by taking her child off milk and he changed dramatically too.
So my final thought is to not push, maybe she is sensitive to milk and her body is telling her to avoid it. I've heard that almond milk is a good alternative, but I haven't been able to find it yet.

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J.M.

answers from St. Louis on

Maybe she just doesn't like the taste of milk. I know I don't. If you are concerned about calcium, there are other choices such as cheese, yogurt, etc. I certainly would not try to force milk by not allowing her to have any other drink options. I wouldn't substitute colas or sweet drinks such as kool-aid, though. Water is a wonderful drink, and it starts good habits early. Juice is fine, too, but there again, moderation is the key.

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T.S.

answers from Kansas City on

Have you tried Goat's Milk? It is more like human milk... you can find it at Whole Foods.

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A.R.

answers from Springfield on

My daughter was/is severely allergic to milk.

You don't have to have cow's milk to be healthy...just make sure your daughter is getting her calcium from other sources. Try Rice Milk, Soy Milk, or calcium added orange juice.

At one time I had to resort to liquid calcium added to juice...then she quit drinking juice and refused everything but water.

Then we tried calcium suppliments.

Which I later found stuck down in the dirt of a houseplant when I repotted it. (the fact they weren't dissolving in the watered plant should have clued me in they wouldn't have helped her anyway)

Crafy little buggers these kids can be!

So then I went to a chewable calcium suppliment that looked/tasted like Gummi Bears.

And made her eat them in front of me. Complete with sticking out her tongue. The only way this was accomplished was to make it clear she either ate the Bear, or we took a dose of liquid vitamins that tasted somewhat like a mixture of crude oil and sweaty socks from the Dallas Cowboys football team.

Just sitting the bottle on the table with a spoon was usually enough to get the Bears down the hatch.

A mother's work is never done.

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K.C.

answers from Wichita on

You can find Almond milk at health food stores or even Wal-Mart!
I am not sensitive to milk, but when I was pregnant with my daughter I could not drink cow's milk (it made me gag). Almond milk was a good alternative.
Keep trying to feed her other sources of Calcium & vitamin D (vitamin D helps the body absorb calcium).

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M.S.

answers from Kansas City on

Have you tried Ovaltine. My daughter was premature and she is still 2 1/2 and they still have her on whole milk. Ovaltine has the vitamins, etc. in it as well - comes in a variety of flavors. It is worth a try.....

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L.B.

answers from St. Joseph on

Had this same problem myself...first, don't worry about it...if you can get some dairy into her (ice cream, yogurt, cheese, etc...then you are doing fine). 2nd have patience...I had to back door my son into drinking milk via Yahoo...yes, I know it doesn't have any milk in it...but the point was that it was premixed and tasted like milk...he thought it was chocolate milk! We kept on that about 2-4 weeks and he was breezing through them...so I just started bringing home the premixed chocolate milk from the refrigerated section. Yes, it may cost more then plain milk but if she drinks it, is not your mission accomplished?

I found that no matter Nestle, Hershey's, Ovaltine, etc. he would not drink the milk...he didn't like the grainey taste of the powders and the syrup just didn't taste as good as the premixes...

You also might want to consider getting her tested for allergies...my hubby has a milk allergy so that all dairy tastes sour to him...my son used to make a face when he drank white milk (like it was sour) but if he drinks Chocolate we don't have any problems...I can't get him to drink it every day and he'll go through spurts, but at least I can get him to occasionally drink it...hope this helps.

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J.P.

answers from Kansas City on

There is nothing that says kids HAVE to drink milk. Milk has vitamin D, calcium, and protein - but it is not the only source. She can eat other dairy (cheese, yogurt) or you can try soy or rice milk. Make sure she gets a daily vitamin, sunshine, and you can add calcium enriched juice, bread, etc. This isn't a sword you need to fall on. Good luck!

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V.Y.

answers from Wichita on

have you ever thought that she might be allergic? I hate milk because I was allergic and my mother didn't believe me. I would try to drink it and throw up. Maybe there is a substitute for calcium for her if that is your concern.

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J.J.

answers from St. Louis on

She doesn't need to drink milk. Give her 3 servings of dairy per day. Milk does not have to be one of them. Try cheese, yogurt, cottage cheese, smoothies, the drinkable yogurts, ect.

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S.M.

answers from Kansas City on

Try Danimals. They are a yogurt drink with twice the calcium as milk.

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B.S.

answers from Joplin on

Don't worry about it.
Instead, get her some calcium fortified orange juice, and feed her lots of dark green veggies, yogurt, cheese, ice cream, etc.
You might try soy milk. Especially the vanilla flavored ones. They taste a lot like baby formula (sweet) and tots seem to like it for that reason.
My daughter has had a severe milk allergy since babyhood, and has done fine without the milk. Since your child has no such allergy, it will be easier for you to get the calcium and vitamin D into her from other milk related sources. You could even give her a calcium suppliment and/or vitamins.
Our pediatrician once told us that he preferred no human drank cow's milk after age 2 or 3 anyway because at that point the risks (of heart disease, etc) outweigh the benefits. I don't think I would go THAT far (I get my milk straight from the cow, and if you google it and check into it, the health benefits of "raw milk" are amazing)but apparently we can do just fine without it.

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A.M.

answers from Springfield on

I had this problem with my oldest. the only way it worked for me was not offering other drinks only that one. she may wine for awhile but she will get thirsty.

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L.C.

answers from Kansas City on

I have not read all the responses yet, but I will give you the advice that worked for us. My son refused cows milk as well. He hated soy and goats milk; plus I could not afford it either. His Dr told us to only give him milk and no food, water nothing but milk until he drank it. It became a control thing and all we did was give him his milk in his sippy cup. The Dr assured me once he got hungry or thirsty he would drink it. It worked like a charm. It took less than 24 hrs and he gave in and drank the whole glass. Now all my son will drink is milk or water. Our Dr now said it seems he is drinking too much milk!

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C.W.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi D.,
My son is 4 and still does not drink much milk at all. He never did like it. The one time that I did get him to drink it was through those cereal straws that they have out and since he thought it was fun he drank it. He ended up having a lot of loose stools. He gets a kids multi-vitamin everyday, Centrum has a good kids vitamin but for your little girl you will need to cut them in half. My son also loves those go- gurt thing, it is yogurt in a tube. You can just substitute yogurt, cheese etc. Be sure to check with your daughters doc to make sure she is taking enough calcium and vitamin D but I would not force the milk. My son didn't like it and I found out the hard way why. Like I said he is 4 and still only drinks a little it here and there but he gets enough dairy in his diet. Best of luck to you! I am sure your daughter will be just great.

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P.M.

answers from Kansas City on

D.,

Check out www.notmilk.com and be glad that your daughter is
sending you down a new nutrition education path. I believe that
Mom's have to be the "Nutritionist of our families" so we owe it to our families to do the research and search out the truth and find alternatives to commercial dairy products.

One of my good friends will be doing a free nutrition and wellness lecture on Family Nutrition 101 in a few weeks. Let me
know if you would like the details. She is wonderful! And offers so many practical tips that we can apply now. We are on a journey to improve the health and nutrition of our families and prevent the diseases promoted by the Standard American Diet! Let me know if you'd like more information. Good Luck!

P.

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T.A.

answers from St. Louis on

D.-
My daughter went through this to at a time when we took her bottle away. She drinks everything else out of her cup, water bottles, etc... but no milk. She is now 2 1/2 and still no milk, she does love other milk products like cheese and yogurt and after talking with the pediatrition and her taking her vitamins we were told that this is sometimes normal.
T.

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K.C.

answers from St. Louis on

Once upon a time when I was a very little girl, I LOVED milk! Loved, loved, LOVED it! 2 Things happened while I was still very young that changed all of that. 1. On our farm, we drank milk cold that we collected from the tank. There is nothing more WHOLE than that. My grandparents and my family lived on the same farm. I would be playing outside and decide to run over to my granparents house to say hi. One of them would get me a glass of milk and put it in one of those metal glasses. The cold milk tasted so good in that glass. I still can remember that to this day, 30 + years later. I never drank all of it, so they would put my glass in the refrigerater, as they knew that I would be back in, a little while later to finish it. Well, this one particular day, my grandma also had a glass of cream that she had skimmed from the milk pitcher. She put it in the same type of glass and I grabbed the wrong glass and chugg-a-lugged it. Not a good thing. It made me sick. 2. Within a year, one day at school the cooler, where all of the milk was stored, broke down. No one realized it. The milk had gotten warm and started to sour. During our Milk Break, I took a big ole swig of milk from one of the cartons that had soured and promptly threw up. From then on I refused to drink milk. I will drink heated milk (hot chocolate or when making milk and noodles) on occassion, but not very much of it. My mom was concerned and my doctor said that as long as I ate other foods that that provided that same vitamins as milk does I would be fine. As I get older I have tried to take vitamins that have extra calcium, just in case, which he also mentioned that I would eventually have to do.

You may not feel comfortable with this option and some parents don't, I know. I have friends parents that would try to make me drink milk while I was visiting. It didn't matter what my doctor had said. So I started telling people that I was allergic to it. Here are a couple of suggestions: Try soy milk or organic milk. They come in various flavors, as well. My daughter loves milk and drinks any of the above. Her favorite however is organic. Not sure why. I know that it has a somewhat different taste. Or you could try Lactaid, which is for people who are lactose intolerant. My siser drinks skim because she is lactose intolerant and that works for her. I would suggest that as an option as well. Maybe your daughter Just doesn't feel quite right after she drinks regular milk and that is why she won't drink it. Just a couple of suggestions to think about.

Good Luck!

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D.M.

answers from Kansas City on

Try chocolate soy milk. It is almost as good but doesnt have the same texture as regular milk. It is lighter and more like a drink than milk is.

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S.T.

answers from St. Louis on

My son, who is almost 12 months and I are both vegetarians. We still consume dairy at this time, but we are slowly becoming vegan. Humans do not NEED any dairy. The fats and calcium that you are probably wanting your daughter to have are readily available in many other sources. Have you tried soy milk, rice milk, or almond milk? These are tasty alternatives and they come in different flavors. Chocolate almond milk is like drinking ice cream. It is absolutely delicious. My son drinks soy milk, and he will never even taste cow's milk. I wouldn't stress about it, she will get her calcium from other foods she eats. If anything, try to find a vitamin made for toddlers. Good luck!

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