21 Month Old Does NOT like to Sleep

Updated on March 08, 2011
J.R. asks from Tolley, ND
6 answers

Does anyone have any tricks for getting a child to sleep?? I will explain....My daughter has always been an early riser, when she was around 6 months to 9 months she would get up for the day at 3am. Of course then she would still take naps. As she got older she learned to sleep until 5am or even 6 am. That was great for a while.....in the last couple months she has kind of decided that she doesn't want to sleep. It used to be like clockwork for her, bedtime at 8, possibly wake a few times in the night but would go back to sleep. Then up around 6am then nap at noon for 2 to 3 hours. Well all of a sudden she wouldn't go to bed at night so we shortened the nap to 1 1/2 hours during the day, that worked and now I am lucky to get her to sleep by 1030 and that is with at least 2 hours of bickering time to go to sleep, night night, love you, close your eyes lol etc. Well she gets up anywhere from 630am to 730am and is only sleeping 1 1/2 hours during the day if I can get her down. Sometimes she goes to sleep and wakes up within a half hour and refuses to go back to sleep. Please give me any advice you think will be helpful! Thanks! (Sorry it's so long!)No, she is not in a crib anymore. She was climbing out and falling, it was just too dangerous to leave her in her crib. We converted her crib to a toddler bed about a month ago. I try to keep to a routine, She has dinner about 530-6, when she is done eating we do a bath then play/read books then settle down and watch a movie usually. I either rock her or lay with her and she knows that its bed time. She will lay still for 2 hours but will not go to sleep. Most nights I shut all the lights off in the house then she cries for a while but will give in and lay down either with me or by herself and go to sleep. I can not get her to go to sleep in her bed. She will constantly get out or be jumping up and down on the bed. Once she is asleep I put her in her bed and she will sleep there most of the night. Some nights she will wake about 11 but most nights it is 2 or 3 in the morning when she wakes and I just take her to bed with me otherwise she will wake all the way up and we will start all over. I know I probably shouldn't take her to bed with me but I didn't figure it was affecting me or her in any way. She doesn't seem to want to sleep with me all the time or anything. When she naps she sleeps in her bed the whole time. Thanks for the suggestions!!!you guys are great! I'm new so I don't really know how to add to this---I have recently checked her teeth and I don't see any molars back there other than the 1 year molars. I did "try" the medicine before bed approach, I thought maybe she had some teeth pain that I just couldn't see but I couldn't bring myself to make a habit of that. It wasn't making a difference so I didn't see the need for it and didn't think it was good for her. I tried like 2 nights of it and that was all. I also have to wake my daughter at 7am for daycare/work. That is the hardest part when she doesn't go to sleep the night before. She seems so tired but refuses to sleep. By 730 or 8 at night she is whining about the littlest thing and I can tell that she is really tired. Why do kids make it so hard on themselves and not just go to sleep! Along with her being tired...that makes me tired because neither one of us is really getting the sleep we need. On the side car crib thing---my room is not large enough to fit her crib in there and it's only 5 steps away to her room so it really isn't a big deal that I get up to get her. I jump right away though because of the toddler bed, it is open in the middle and she tends to roll out in the middle of the night or when she tries to get out she falls. She is a really restless sleeper, constantly moving. I figured the toddler bed was a shorter fall than a fall from trying to get out of her crib. Okay, that's all I can think of for now. lol Trying to give all possible info so I can get the most help!! :)

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So What Happened?

ok updating --- I know that she is over tired....I have tried and tried to get her to bed at 7 or 730. Just seems impossible with her. Her bedtime was 7 for a long time then moved to 730 because at 730 there wasn't a fight anymore she would just go to sleep. Also if she wakes up at 6, I can't just leave her there, she will get out of bed and start wandering around. When she wakes up she is sitting up laughing or talking and trying to get out of bed yelling mom, mom, mom. lol I am having daycare let her sleep as long as she wants to this week during her nap time with the exception of going over 3 hours. then going to work on keeping consistent on a bedtime ritual and bed TIME. Hopefully I come to some sort of solution this week!

More Answers

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C.L.

answers from Minneapolis on

She's probably overly tired. It seems counter-intuitive, but overly tired kids have trouble sleeping. I always recommend Mary Sheedy Kurcinka's book, "Sleepless in America," for all sleep issues. She was very helpful to me and my boys when they were younger. I haven't checked it out lately, but she also used to have a website, www.parentchildhelp.com. I had to transition my youngest to a toddler bed at about that age for the same reason. He was actually even a little younger. That can be a big adjustment. Mary's book will probably have some tips for you.

2 moms found this helpful
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L.P.

answers from Pittsfield on

Have you ever heard of weighted blankets? I learned about them from a friend of mine who is a speech therapist familiar with sensory issues. She highly recommends them for anyone with sleep problems. The Deep Pressure Touch Stimulation they provide has a naturally calming effect. It may help her stay asleep once she falls asleep. Here's a website where you can learn more. This website has ones that are safe for children under 3. There may be other websites too. Hope it helps :)
http://www.weightedblanket.net/faq.htm
PS- check out the testimonials

1 mom found this helpful
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E.N.

answers from Minneapolis on

I totally agree that she is way over-tired. She needs to go to bed by 7 at the latest, and she needs to sleep until 6am. Don't go to her before 6am so that her body is trained to know to keep sleeping until then.

Read the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child," by Weissbluth. It is fantastic. It has great, practical, awesome tips/guide to follow. And, it totally works.

Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
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J.J.

answers from Appleton on

It's fine to take her to bed with you. Do not feel guilty about that. Kids need some night-time parenting! You could even side-car the crib to your bed to give her her own sleeping space then you don't have to get up at night to go get her. It's just a little suggestion and you might want to google side-carring to make sure you get some tips on how to do it right.

Around 24 months my son started to not fall asleep like clockwork either. Bedtime was a battle with him standing up in the crib not wanting to sleep. Since he usually does sleep when he's tired I took it as a cue that maybe he's just not tired at that time. So for a few weeks he found his own schedule. When he napped I let him go as long as he needed. At night I waited until he showed signs of being tired (rubbing eyes, squirming as we read books) until I went in to lay down with him. If he still protested, but I was really certain at this point that he was tired then I would just be firm. Usually he would accept sleep. He's 27 months now and falling asleep at 9pm, waking around 7am, and napping from 1-2:30/3:00.

We also went through a phase of 45 minute naps just recently. I thought he was dropping his nap, but it passed in about 2-3 weeks. I found find that if he slept for 12 hours overnight he seemed to not be able to take a long nap the next day. So even if he had a short nap I stuck to the same bedtime or maybe only slightly earlier. Then he was tired enough the next day to take a longer nap.

Teething...could she have molars coming in that might make settling down difficult? Sometimes the pain isn't really noticable to the child until she's calm and just laying there. Maybe a little medicine before bed would help.

I don't know if that's helpful, but I tried! Take care and good luck!

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A.H.

answers from Canton on

I don't have an answer for you but I have a 2 1/2yr old that is the same way and has really never been a good sleeper. Her latest routine is bed between 10-12 and we have to get her up at 7:00 so we can take her to daycare and then off to work. We've asked them to cut down her nap at daycare and that seems to help a little but not much. I'm interested to read your answers to see if there's anything that might help us. Hopefully someone will suggest something that will work for you.

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

If it takes 2 hours to get her to sleep, start earlier so she's sleeping by 8.
Is she still in a crib?
Have you tried some white noise in her room at night? Or soft music.
It does sound like she's over tired.
They never sleep well when they are too tired.
Let her nap longer and still put her to bed at normal time (8) even if she doesn't "seem" tired.
Do you do bath, snack, books, prayers, bed type of routine? That gives them "cues" to get ready for sleep and allows them to settle down...
Good luck!

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