2Nd Marriage Opinions

We went to two destination weddings that were very nice, but simple. They both had receptions back at home afterward for those who couldn't make it to the wedding. I thought it was a great idea. We've even been to a reception in a park that was pot-luck. It's whatever You want to do. There is no right or wrong way to do it.

If I were you, regardless of how your 1st marriages were performed it is both the second time around for you. I would keep it simple yet meaningful and save your money to fix up the house. You don't want to start of this marriage with wedding debt or be short on fixing up your house. If you dont' want to do a destination wedding I would seriously discuss the guest list on who really should come and go with that. Otherwise, have your destination wedding/honeymoon come back and still keep the reception small but do a nice one within your budget.

When I got married (my second, his first) neither of us wanted a big deal. We went away and got married, then had a small recepetion about a few weeks later. That made the parents happy! :)
Just remember--YOUR wedding, YOUR way.

What we did (my first wedding and his 2nd, but he had a fairly big wedding the first time) was to have an immediate family only ceremony, honeymoon and informal "un-reception" after our trip with everyone else.

I think you could still have a big wedding if that suits you, but consider other options. For example, I rented a popular venue on a weekday and got it for "conference room" rates. I mainly needed the indoor space for food and bad weather contingency. I used a photographer that did calendars and other work and was looking to get into weddings. He did a good job, we got a beautiful album and all our negatives, for $400. That sort of thing. Spend more on what's most important. If the personalized napkins aren't important to you, go to Party City and buy the plain ones in your colors. I found that any time I could avoid the word "wedding" it was less expensive. You can also check out community parks and buildings. In our area, many historic buildings are for rent, for less than at a big hotel or traditional "wedding venue". Or hey, just have the reception in the social hall of the church.

I'd also weigh how important it would be for Aunt Edna to attend. Maybe in the name of family peace you compromise somewhere to have a bigger guest list, especially if they all missed out the first time.

Hope that helps. We paid for everything ourselves, too.

I once had a book named "How to have a great wedding for under $5,000". One suggestion was to ask certain friends and relatives to each bring a pot luck dish. You could have it at home or reserve a table in a park and have a picnic. You should also ask people to help with the organizing. My own idea was to have each of 3 or 4 people bake a layer of a cake and the day before have them come over to stack and ice it. Each layer could be a surprise flavor. You could go to the cake decorating store and get different size pans to give out to your favorite bakers. I'm sure your friends and relatives will cut you some slack since you are trying to fix up your house - and the economy stinks! Good luck with your new life together.

We found a small cute chapel and invited just a few very close friends.
Made my own bouquet. It was very nice. Not alot of stress and much more intimate.
Congrats,
C.

My mom planned my first wedding and I planned my second and it was great fun. I had the long train and the big church wedding. Plan what YOU want and have a blast.

Set a budget and then set your priorities. If you have $1000 to spend and you really want to be married in your church, find out the cost and then go from there. If you have $5000 and really want the whole family there- get a quote for a catered dinner at your home and work from there.

Remember that you don't need to wear a wedding gown, but you want to wear something special. You can purchase a bridesmaid gown or mother-of-the-bride gown for much less and still look beautiful! You can have a catered dinner without the "servers" and use paper goods and still have an awesome party.

When we got married, we did our rehearsal at our home. We had about 60 people, rented a tent/tables/chairs, hired a caterer, paper goods and beer/wine/soda for under $3000. We wanted something relaxed and fun with all of our family there rather than a sit-down dinner with just the bridal party- it's really up to you!

I did a small wedding at a local chapel, then a back yard reception. The chape held like 80 people, and we have a huge back yard. You might consider them same. As for cost, I got simple invitations, my husband wore his kilt and we just rented the jacket, and I spent a whole 100 dollars on my dress on Ebay. Add in the cake, some refreshments and stuff, and we spent less than $1000.

Just a word of advice (and I hope this doesn't come across as condescending) but spend more time planning your marriage than you do your wedding. A wedding is one party on one day....a marriage is supposed to be a lifetime. I know it is fun to get caught up in the planning of an event, but it just seems prudent to me to worry more about the bigger picture instead of one day.

Seems like as the average price of a wedding has gone up, so has the divorce rate...

My fiance and I are getting married in 3 weeks. This is both of our 2nd weddings and we each have children. It was very important to us to have our VERY close family and VERY close friends celebrate this day with us. We are actually having a friend (who is a minister) perform the ceremony for us. We are having the ceremony at a historical Mansion and then off to a resturaunt for dinner. We were also on a strict budget and had to make it very clear to everyone that though we would love them to be there, we could not invite everyone. Our wedding (including us) is a total of 50 guests. ((side note, we originally said 25 people...ha ha, that didn't work out too well)) By not having a "typical" wedding with a reception hall etc, really cut down our cost big time. I made my own Brooch bouquet (you can find instructions online at www.fancypantsweddings.com) it is made from artificial hydrangias (sp?) and all of my moms, grandma and great grandma's old brooches. It is going to be something very special that I carry (and VERY sparkley too) ;) Anyway, you will find the ways to cut corners as it works for the two of you. You need to first decide how big you want to go. It is VERY tough to not invite everyone but you have to remember what is most important to the two of you that day...which is eachother. Best of luck to the two of you!

I had my second wedding 10/09. I had a big first wedding, he went to the courthouse. So he wanted to have a "real" wedding, I wanted to elope! So we did something in the middle that was fun and worked for us. We live in Gilbert but have family in CA and the Vegas area. So we got married in Laughlin on the riverboat. The wedding weekend was Thurs - Sun for anyone that wanted to go. We got discounted rooms because we had a "group". We had a lot of fun. I wore a full wedding dress, him a tux that he already had. Our girls (14/11) wore matching dresses and our son (8) dressed up too. The whole 4 day weekend cost about $2500 for everything. Congrats and have fun!!!

Have the wedding you want (here or elsewhere). If having it here, you will will have more for the reception. If elsewhere, send out wedding ANNOUNCEMENTS and skip the party.