3 Month Old Nap/feeding Schedule?

Updated on August 27, 2010
K.A. asks from Costa Mesa, CA
11 answers

Hello! I know 3 months is a bit young to be on a "schedule" so I'm just following my son's cues right now for hunger and tiredness. The books I've read say to do "eat play sleep" which I'm doing, and they also say he should be able to stay awake no more than about 2 hours during the day, which is true for him. My question is that he will take a nap after every 2 hours, but then will only sleep for 45 minutes for the most part (sometimes I can soothe him back to sleep a bit longer) - should I always feed him immediately upon waking, which would put him on a 2:45 feeding schedule (approximately) or should I wait for him to appear hungry after waking? If I wait for his hunger cue, might this sway the eat play sleep schedule to become eat, play, sleep, play, etc. until eventually he would need to sleep right after eating? Am I freaking out too much? :) Will this all work itself out or is there more I should be doing right now? The reason I'm a bit concerned is I'm going back to work next week and the grandmas are taking care of him - I want to give them as much guidance as possible. Thank you!

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A.B.

answers from San Diego on

I think that you need to calm down and not freak out. No matter what you ell the grandmas they are going to do what they want to do - especially if he's fussy. You need to let go, because they will be his primary caregivers - you are going to end up following the schedule they set him on mom - just relax and don't fret. Whatever happens - if he's eating, sleeping and playing - he'll be a happy boy.

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T.K.

answers from Honolulu on

I also have a 3 month old (girl). I/we don't really have any type of schedule going on with her- we kinda just follow her lead. She's up more during the day. So if I had to put it in order sometimes it's eat play eat sleep. But it really depends on her
Good luck

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P.C.

answers from San Francisco on

All babies are different. No offense, but no book can tell you how to mother your baby, it comes natrually! If you feel that when your baby cries you should feed him/her than that's what you do, or maybe your baby just wants to be held. Just relax!! At your baby's age all they're going to do is eat and sleep, that's how they grow. Grandmas' know how to take care of babies' so don't worry too much. I also went back to work when my baby was 3 months and he got adjusted to my schedule, he is 4 years now and we have the same schedule and he is so good about it.

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H.J.

answers from Minneapolis on

my 3.5 mo old usually sleeps, plays, eats and then sometimes sleep right after or plays then sleeps. She doesn't last much more then 2 hours at a time if that. But she also doesn't take huge naps during the day but the compromize is she usually sleeps 8-11 hrs straight at night so the cat naps are o.k. with us.

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S.A.

answers from San Diego on

I have been doing the eat play sleep cycles with my baby since she was about 5 weeks old (she is now 8 months). It worked very well for my baby. All babies are definitely different, but there was a period of time that my daughter would wake after only 45 minutes of napping and that was usually due to me keeping her up for too long. When babies nap they go through cycles of deep sleep. Their first cycle is usually done somewhere between 30-45 minutes and many babies wake up after the first cycle is over and can't go back to sleep. Sometimes it might be because their wake time was too long. 2 hours might be a bit long for your 3 month old to be awake. You can try decreasing his wake time by about 15 minutes and see if that helps him sleep longer.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

relax.

Feed a baby on-demand. Yes, and before sleep and after waking.
Do not feed according to a 'schedule' because scheduling feedings do NOT take into consideration that a baby's appetite varies and does not take into consideration their growth-spurts and that each baby even 'cluster feeds' which means they even feed every single hour.... and this is all normal.
Feed on-demand.
I breastfed both my kids, they would need feedings every 3 hour so less. This was for the 1st year. It was feedings on-demand 24/7, day and night.

NOT all babies, display 'hunger' cues.... blatantly. So you need to know your baby.

And MANY babies do fall asleep after feedings... normal.

A baby does get tired after about 2 hours after waking. Then they feed. Personally, a more sane guideline is:
baby wakes
feed/nurse
baby is awake
2 hours later or so, baby gets tired.
Feed before nap or sleep
baby sleeps
baby wakes after nap/sleep
feed baby
baby is awake
2 hours or so later, baby gets tired
Feed before nap or sleep
baby sleeps/naps
baby wakes after nap/sleep
feed baby
etc.

"Playing" before sleep... in an infant... or child, typically gets them more stimulated... OR "over-tired, and thus, they cannot sleep/nap well.

A more sane thing is:
after baby wakes, feed/nurse him.
then baby is awake
then baby gets tired... then nurse/feed him again.

"Playing" does not mean he has to do all sorts of 'activities." At this age, even a bath is a major activity for a baby and they get tired. Even just hanging out, is busy for an infant.
Babies this age, get easily over-stimulated as well. Being over-stimulated then causes over-tiredness. Over-tiredness actually makes a baby/child unable to sleep well and to fall asleep well and to stay asleep well.

next, when your baby 'wakes' from a nap after 45 minutes... is it really him 'waking' or you going in and waking him just because he makes noises or stirs while sleeping? There is a difference. For example: if he is just stirring/making noises (but is not crying), then try and let him be.... he may go back to sleep. But if you interrupt this process... then he WILL wake wake up. That is how my son was. He'd stir/make noises while napping... but if I let him be and let his rhythms of sleep just be... he would on his own fall back asleep. So I didn't "wake" him just because I heard him stir. BUT, If I WOKE him up just because he stirred or made noises... then he did NOT get a full nap.... and he was actually still tired.
So know... your baby's rhythms... and cues....
Of course if your baby is waking up crying.. then go get him, comfort him etc., but, he may go back to sleep. Unless you then interact with him immediately and get all active with him.

I always nursed my kids as babies when they woke up, on demand throughout the day and night and before any nap/sleep.
My kids as babies, often got tired before 2 hours. So... the bottom line is... that is how it is sometimes. Everyday is different.
As a baby/infant... the whole day is spent on feedings and their naps.

all the best,
Susan

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C.W.

answers from Austin on

My 4 month DD did the same thing. I tried to stick to the "schedule" but she wouldn't cooperate.. so I started going more by her cues. I will try to feed her when she wakes up, but if she doesn't seem to want it I will leave it till a bit later. She actually started napping less lately, so it's more like sleep, play, eat, play sleep OR sleep, eat, play, eat, sleep. lol. During this last month she has gone from napping every 2 hours or so to only taking 3 naps a day, and obviously she needs to eat more than that! lol. The only time she wants to sleep right after eating is at night (when that's what I want anyway! lol)

~Also, every baby is different. My DD was only sleeping for about 20-40 minutes during her naps when she was going every 2 hours, and now with her 3 naps thing she has 2 naps that last 30 minutes, and one that usually goes for 1-1 1/2 hr. She WON'T sleep more than that... bu she makes up for it during the night (which is AWESOME! lol)

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J.H.

answers from Phoenix on

Hi Karen- my kids are now 3 1/2 and 2 1/2 but I very well remember how you are feeling right now. If you are a schedule oriented person, trying to get your baby on a schedule is an important priority for you. I am very type A and wanted my baby to fall into line with that. As we all know, babies have a mind of their own and may not want to fit into our mold. However, I believe they will naturally fall into their own schedule as long as they get some structured guidance from parents/guardians. Just be prepared for changes in the schedule almost every 4 weeks as they develop!

One of my daughters schedules at 3 months was the following: She ate at 7am, 10am, 1pm, 4pm, 7pm, 10:30pm, and usually had 1 feeding in the middle of the night but the time changed frequently. During the day she usually naped for 45 minutes to an hour in her crib, but she would sleep 2-3 hours straight in her swing. At night, she slept from 7:30pm-2/3/or 4 am (that is anywhere from 6-8 hours straight). I gave her a dream feed at 10:30pm which is where she drank her milk in her sleep (in her crib or in my arms) but never woke up! By the end of the month we changed her schedule and she ate every 4 hours (7am, 11am, 3pm, 615pm) and her bed time was 6:30pm. She still woke for at least one feeding in the middle of the night.

I don't have a crazy photographic memory, I am just obsessive and wrote everything down :) I kept a website on my kids which you are more than welcome to check out. I know I loved reading about other moms' schedules and what they experienced with their kids. www.harrisfamilyfun.com My blogs from the girls infant days are under the link "all about Brynn" and "all about hannah". Brynn's probably has more useful schedule info as she was my first.

Good luck!

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M.C.

answers from Honolulu on

I had both my kids on a 3 hour schedule from birth, so I am not in the camp that says to wait for hunger cues. Early on, this would involve waking them to eat or holding them off for another 10 minutes while they cried, and often waking them up after the first side so they could "finish" eating a full meal. This would ensure that they could wait 3 hours and not get hungry again after 2 hours. Seems cruel, but I, too had to go to work and needed to have a little bit of control on the feeding issue. I thought it worked great. My kids slept well at night and I could control my day without having to whip it out in the grocery store! I say go for a 2:45 schedule (which, is pretty hard to keep track of, so maybe you can hold him off for a 3 hour schedule??) Good luck with going back to work!

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J.P.

answers from Boise on

2.45 schedule is fine, but 2 hours seems like a lot to be awake. You may try to put him down a bit earlier. My daughter is 3.5 months and is awake for about an hour (including feeding), and then down for 1.5-2.5 hours.

Oh, and unless he is waking up early and you want to prolong him, feeding him upon waking is fine.

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C.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi Karin,
I did the same schedule and I had my guy awake for 1.5 hours and asleep for 2. Your guy may be getting too much awake time, especially if he is newly three months old. At this age babies can be overly stimulated which can make it harder for them to go to sleep.
I would not go to demand feeding. Learning how to care for an infant is exhausting and sometimes confusing to know what their needs are. Keeping to a schedule allows you to know his needs without a lot of guess work. You may want to check to be sure he is getting a full meal with each feeding. If your guy is snacking that may be part of the issue. This means that he may need to eat a minimum of 15 minutes if he is a fast eater and 30 if he's slow. It does work out eventually. Their little bodies just need to adjust to the routine.

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