3 Y/o Meltdowns

He was tired, in a new environment, with LOTS of people and activity around him, over-stimulation etc.
Also at his age, they do NOT have "coping-skills' for dealing with difficulty.
Having coping-skills, is NOT an inherent ability for this age or many adults for that matter.
It has to be taught, to a child.
Also, how to express himself, and knowing that he can go to you for help or when he is not feeling happy or irritated etc.

It was the situation.
Do NOT let others, make you feel something is 'wrong' with your son.
People generally 'remember' childhood as being either all good or all bad. In hindsight.

This is also not an easy age, developmentally.
Their 'emotions' are not even fully developed, NOR do they have automatic ability, to master each and every emotion or upset. It has to be taught to them about how they can express themselves AND seek their parents help, to guide them.

Kids HAVE tantrums. NO kid is perfect nor 100% cognizant about their emotions nor about coping skills.
ALL kids, even the most ideal kid, Tantrums.
Also at this age, "impulse control" is not 100% developed, at-will.

Every kid, will err.
But you teach him... how to manage. So that he gets more articulate about handling... his upsets.

all the best,
Susan

Sometimes when kids get over-stimulated they have tantrums. My now 4 year old had them at the craziest times over practically nothing, and especially when he was over-tired, hungry, etc. The littlest things set them off and there is really no "normal", since all kids are different. If you think you handled things properly who cares what others think, they will always have their opinions and you will always be the parents who have to deal with your children every day. He'll grow out of them and the next time maybe your family will get to see how much he has matured and grown. Don't be too hard on yourself!

Don't worry, he is fine! My son who is 3.5 has tantrums 20 times more often when we have family visit us. They come and stay for a few days to a few weeks since they don't live close. Every time they come I can 110% guarantee he is going to meltdown multiple times a day. For him he is showing off and getting attention from people he doesn't normally see. It is soooooo frustrating on my part becuase I say he isn't usually like this, but feel like my parenting skills are being evaluated by the minute.

Hang in there!

Tantrums will happen no matter what the circumstance (sure, more in crowds when tired or hungry whatever) if they're allowed, so I don't know why people were acting like there may have been "too many". Some parents allow them, some don't. Some kids have a lot, some have some, some have none.

Mine have none, but when we were teaching them not to haven them with firm discipline, they were trying a few times a day. (but not for more than one day-they learned quick-except my 3rd rager, she took a bit longer...maybe a few days spread out over time to see if I would forget she wasn't allowed)

If they're not allowed, the circumstances won't matter, they won't have them, and you'll know the rare times the child really is just melting down from honest fatigue and hunger-which of course you don't discipline.

If you want the tantrums to stop (they won't if he's 3 unless you stop them-he's probably just getting geared up to increase them), discipline will stop them. Otherwise, just let him have them, and it's no one else's business. It's totally acceptable to most parents today.

Don't let anyone tell you they CAN'T control it. That's a myth perpetuated by the contemporary psych authors despite generations (still living hello) and cultures who have proved otherwise. It's a philosophical discipline choice. Whatever you choose is right for you. If you want them to stop:
www.backtobasicsdiscipline.com

My son is 3 yrs 4 months and he is really testing us these days. And it does get worse when there is an "audience." We were at a birthday party on Sunday for a 4 yr old, so kids between 3 and 4.5, and there was a lot of parental discussion about what a tough age this is. People talk about the terrible twos, but we all agreed 3 is much harder. I also was recently at the home of my husband's childless aunt, and her husband was very contemptuous of us for our parenting skills because our 3 yr old (with a slight fever) was whining and didn't want to eat. I felt like you do, but then let it go. We all have good days and bad days, and no one else knows your child as well as you do.