Our son had the ear tubes (both ears) when he was little. Our doctor's advice was to see if one of us could go to part-time work to help him not be in childcare so much. Between the tubes and me going part-time, that helped immensely with his issues. I know that's not an option for everyone, but it's something to consider. (Talk about Mommy guilt! Sometimes I think our doctor's advice was old-fashioned, but it really did help!)
I agree that coming out of anaesthesia is the hardest, regardless of the procedure, single or multiple. But that may be when your child may be most compliant, too, for the next day or two.
Create some quiet, soothing times with your daughter. I have a very active son (now 11) who has always loved books, movies, fireplace fires, etc. Whatever she likes that soothes her might be a good bet during the recovery time. And draw from your special reserves of patience and warmth during this time. You may need it!
One question...I guess I'm a little surprised to hear of several kids getting all of these procedures done at such a young age. Has the conventional wisdom changed since I was a kid? (Okay, I'm 48, so that was a while ago!) But I thought doctors refrained from removing tonsils and adenoids as long as possible because they served a purpose of battling the "bad guys" in our systems.
I had my tonsils out when I was 12-13. My 19-year-old sister got them out around the same time and she had a much harder time with the recovery. I just remember not wanting to touch the ice cream that everyone said I'd want after the surgery. I've been told it's easier the younger you are, because the roots are not as deep. But 3 seems so young!
I'm not sure I'm providing much advice but I certain will offer lots of encouragement during this time. The ear tubes were a godsend! They made a HUGE difference! And don't forget the earplugs for baths and swimming. (We were just watching some old family movies and was reminded of the earplugs after baths. : )