35 Month Old Won't Use the Bathroom at Home

For my older son, potty training was along process. It is normal to regress some. I wouldn't worry about it. Just keep working at it.

I had the same issue with my daughter around the same age. I just looked for signs that she needed to go potty and said "looks like you need to go potty. Come on, lets go". It made it much easier when I would go with her. But she would usually fight it because she didn't want to stop playing. I would take away whatever she was playing with and physically direct her to the bathroom. Sometimes she would fight and scream, but I would just calmly get her in there (no reaction to her fit) and then take her pants down for her and sit her on the potty. Then she was fine and would go. She really hated it when I would do this so it only took a few times. Now she will go by herself when I first remind her she needs to go. She doesn't have to have me lead her there anymore, I just set the toy aside and point the way.

Also, with my other daughter, I just gave her a choice. I put up both my hands and each hand represented a choice. The first was "You be a big girl and go potty right now by yourself". The second choice was "you can be a little girl and have mommy help you". She loved being able to choose and would alway choose the big girl option. As soon as she chose a hand (I only gave her 10 seconds to choose before I made the choice for her) she would follow right away. It worked great. Actually it still works great for getting her to brush her teeth, go to bed, etc, and she is 5 now.

Good luck!

You've gotten a lot of good responses already. I just wanted to add that I worked in a daycare center for many years, and we had lots of kids that age go through the same thing, and they all grew out of it. The thing that seemed to help was to put the activity they were involved in on hold--if they were playing with a specific toy or game, I would make sure it was put up on a high shelf so no other kids would take it. The child who needed to use the bathroom felt more comfortable about going, because they knew their toy would be there for them when they returned. Otherwise, they didn't want to leave, because they thought someone would take what they were playing with while they were gone.

I did the potty training thing with M&M's. I thought she would get bored with them, but it worked for a very long time, even after the newness of using the potty wore off. Some people may not like to give candy to their kids, but it sure did the trick in my house!

Good luck to you

A.

My 5 year old has this problem. She doesn't want to stop life for fear of missing out on something fun! I took her to the doctor for her 5 year appt. and I talked to the doctor about this problem. He told her she must go when she feels the urge to go. This has helped, coming from a doctor rather than her mother constantly nagging her. So maybe if she hears it from someone else that she holds in high regard, things might change. Hope this helps!

I don't have any great suggestions that haven't already been mentioned. I just remember that when my oldest (the only one potty trained so far) was potty training, we considered her "trained" and then after about the same amount of time you're suggesting, she was doing the same thing yours is doing. It's like she was very motivated and proud for the first while, then got bored with it or something. Like she didn't have time to do it right now because it wasn't that important to her. That phase lasted only a short while, though on the bright side. We would make her clean up the mess, put her wet clothes in the laundry, not give stickers or whatever. She eventually got the hang of it. I think she just lost interest for a bit. Good luck.

Set a timer for every hour and a half at home, when it goes off tell her it is time to stop and try and go potty. Tell her she doesn't have to go but needs to try.
Reminding their bladder that it is time to stop and go and train her to just get into that habit will help.
At school I would ask how often they do potty breaks, that maybe if the teacher isn't bogged down to just ask the class several times if they have to go.
99% of the time if you ask a child if they have to go they will say NO if they are playing.
Just teaching her hardwiring again to stop and take the time out to go with a timer will help, or at least it did with us.
It is all about focus really and reminding her that she is a big girl and HAS to stop and go potty in the potty, that her fun will be there when she gets back.
Good luck, I had bumps with mine at that age too! :)

I have my daughter "just sit" on the potty. She gets mad if I ask her to go before school or ballet, so I tell her she doesn't have to go, she just has to sit. Sometimes she really doesn't have to go, others she unleashes a waterfall! I usually turn the water on in the sink to help. You could also try putting her feet on a bowl of warm water to make her go. I used that one a lot for awhile when I couldn't get her to go on the potty. Good luck!

Hi R.,
Maybe for a while you could take the choice away from her. You said she is hard to "convince" to go to the bathroom. So my suggestion is to stop trying to convince her and just tell her, every 40-60 minutes or so, that it is time to go. Make her go and sit on the toilet and at least try. Just tell her that she has to do that for a while until she can remember to go on her own. Stay very positive about it with her, no negative talk. I would do that for at least a few weeks and get her back in the habit. But, as the other Mom said, toilet training is a process that progresses and regresses for the first few years.
Take care,
B.

When you're ready to follow through, I recommend turning pottying over completely to her. That means whenever she messes, she has to clean up the entire thing. DON'T make it a negative thing, just a natural consequence for times she doesn't make it to the potty. She must change her clothes, wash her underwear in the sink (I know some who even must stay in the bathroom while they wait for their underwear to dry - 'cause they only get one panty per day), clean up the mess where they were if there is one. It can take a week or so, and I recommend having lots of babywipes on hand to help them clean themselves, but eventually they tire of having to clean up after themselves and decide to be more attentive to when they have to go! (still, it is more work for mom making sure they do it, so when YOU'RE ready)

My dream: children come potty trained, and that pregnancies were only 7 months...

Try getting her something very special that she will love. For my daughter we used princess jewlry, a princes costume and ruby red slippers. We put the jewlry and slippers in a glass cake stand on the counter so she can see it every day. I then remind her every hour to go pottey. She ALWAYS says shed does not need to, however I tell her we are going to sit on the pottey and if she goes she can wear her jewlry and slippers. IF she has a BM she gets to wear the outfit or if she goes with no protests. Pottey treats help as well, but the jewlry and slippers work the best. Good luck!