S.H.
I too have twins (almost 3), one that takes a nap very willingly and one that is impossible to put down for a nap. The one that sleeps easily gets to nap in the bed with Daddy, but the one that won't sleep has to stay in her room for one hour (I put the gate up) and find some quiet activity to do. Mostly she reads her Tag Jr. books, but sometimes the activities are not so quiet, like jumping off the bed. I just let her go, unless I think she may be endangering herself. If I put them in the same room at naptime, they would never sleep! At bedtime, it's a different story. They both go to bed fairly easily in the same room, although there's always exceptions. We do the calming down routine--change into PJ's, brush teeth, read a book, go potty, cuddle and sing songs, then it's off to bed. You could try separating them at naptime by putting the less rambunctious one in bed with you, then let her sleep by herself while you have some "me" time. Also, I would let them sleep as long as they can, instead of waking them up at 4 PM. I only start to panic when they sleep past 6 PM. Good luck to you--I couldn't imagine trying to do it by myself!