4 Year Who Has Been Potty Trained for 1 1/2 Years Wetting Himself

I myself have a 12 year old boy who only recently stopped wetting himself and the bed. There could be something else wrong, so it is always best to speak to a doctor. It could be a bladder problem or a psychological problem and it's quite embarrassing for any child to go through. My son ended up taking a pill for a couple of months and he is doing great! The best advise I have is to speak with a doctor. Good luck!

I would highly suggest seeing a dr. It sounds like he has a bladder problem. It runs in my family. I was put on steroids as a small child because my brain did not tell my bladder to hold it in while I was sleeping. It can be something minor and easily treatable.

Have you ruled out bladder infection or UTI? Or do yuo think it really behavior? Just a thought.

If it's behavior, make him change and clean up the mess by himself. Not as punishment, just as part of being responsible for himself. Maybe when he has to do that he'll make more of an effort.

My daughter is 4 and we have been making a big deal about her going to PreK in Sept. She started having accidents. While in a resturant, us girls went to the bathroom. I asked her if she was worried about something. She told me that she was afraid that she would not know where the bathrooms were at school. I reassured her that her teacher will show her. Then we asked big brother(7 yrs) to tell her about the bathrooms at school. We talk about the bathrooms at school at least once a day now. She hasn't wet her pants in 3 days now. So far so good.
If she starts up again, though, I will take her in for tests at the Doctors office. I didn't even think about a medical condition. Thanks for the advice from the others here.

I am a SAHM with 3 kids. Boy (7yrs), girl (4.5 yrs), boy (3 yrs). Married for 9 yrs, to a wonderful man.

Perhaps you should go to the doctor. My nephew had that problem and it turns out he had a bladder infectino and really could not hold it in or tell when he had to go.

I would get him in to the doctor. We just went through this with my 4 year daughter. She started wetting the bed at night. We thought she was in a growth spurt but then started complaining on Friday night about needing to throw up! Saturday morning she was feeling the same (and still wetting). My mom was up visiting and mentioned maybe a UTI. We got her in Saturday morning and sure enough it was UTI. By the time she got to the office she was vomiting and had 103.7 fever! No fever at 8am then 103.7!! She has been on an antiobiotic since Sat and the whole wetting issue is gone:) We felt soooo bad for her. Good luck.

Same advice. My daughter was having some accidents and I was so frustrated. I took her in and the initial urinalysis came back negative. They did a culture and she was positive. Make sure they culture. An antibiotic did wonders.
C.

As a nurse and a mother who had a daughter that had urinary reflux it is very important to seek medical help. She was fully potty trained but had accidents at night, we had her checked and they found that she had urinary reflux on the right side. This is when the urine backs up into the kidney. Although, hers was not bad enough to warrant corrective surgery it needs to be evaluated. If left untreated and they get a kidney infection you can be left with kidney disease and failure. I would definately suggest getting a medical opinion!!

My daughter was the same way. Completely trained for a year and all of the sudden accidents started happening. Take your child to the doctor. Rule out any bladder conditions. My daughter was diagnosed with overactive bladder and bladder spasms. Once I realized it was a medical condition and she did not even realize she was doing it, I felt really bad for disciplining her in the beginning. My daughter would be standing there, talking with me, pee her pants, all over the floor and just keep talking like nothing happened. It all started about the same time as her brother was born so they assumed that was the problem. They were wrong. I would request that tests be done to rule out any medical problem before you discipline your child any further. He may not know that it is happening. IF you want further details feel free to contact me. Good Luck, it is very fresterating, my daughter is 10 now, and still struggling.

Hi C., I have seen this happen before, and the advice of ruling our physical issues is good advice. However, if there are no physical issues, start talking with him about paying attention to his body's signals. At our center we have also had great results with using timers- every time the child hears the timer go off, they are to go to the bathroom. One child we have at our center with that problem started wearing a watch that had an alarm. Then it was his responsibility to go to the bathroom each time his alarm went off. Personally, I haven't ever seen negative reinforcement work, its more a matter teaching them to pay attention to their body.
Good Luck!
E.

I've btdt, so I know how frustrating it can be. Like the others said, go to the doc and rule out any urinary tract issues. My 4.5 yr old went through this about a year ago. We never found the cause, and it just stopped on it's own. I will say that we didn't help him change (or his teachers at school/daycare) the wet clothes. He was responsible for doing that and putting them in the appropriate place all on his own.

Good luck,and let us know what happens!

C.,

He is too old to be having "accidents." This is definately not a potty training issue. I would first rule out a medical condition. He may have a bladder infection or a urinary tract infection. Then rule out a major stress issue (recent move, new day care, death in the family, etc.)

If you learn he is doing it for attention or pressing limits, offering rewards will make it worse because that isn't positive reinforcement, it's bribery. He will learn that he can start misbehaving to get what he wants.

Consequences must be natural, related to the behavior, and unpleasant enough that it will stop. Once you have ruled out anything medical and you are sure he is doing it on purpose, I would sit down and calmly have a talk with him. This is his problem, not yours. So don't get upset or he wins. Tell him he gets one pair of pants per day. If he wets them, he has to wait until tomorrow to get a new pair. By the way, boys with wet pants can't sit in front of the TV or the computer or go out anywhere. And if he ruins his underwear, he will have to earn the money to buy new ones.

I saw a woman try this on Dr. Phil's recommendation and she had her kids wear a plastic bag to protect the furniture. Her son wet twice and stopped. Remember, this method is ONLY for fully potty trained children who are wetting or pooping intentionally for attention, to get out of time out, to manipulate parents, etc. It isn't appropriate for potty training accidents.

Good luck,
S.

Your 6-month is now getting attention as a cute baby because he's begun to 'do things.' Acting like a baby seeminGLy has it just rewards. The older one needs more one-on-one time I suspect and praised for grown-up behavior, I suspect. (My 4 yr old crawled for 2 days when his sister was about 6 months old.) There is always the chance of a urinary infection but the odds are he is trying to tell you something that he is not actually aware of.

V. Lansky
author of TOILET TRAINING: A GUIDE TO DAYTIME AND NIGHTTIME WETTING.

My daughter has been trained for 3 years now. And she started wetting herself. I thought maybe it was because of the new baby and we moved. But then 2 weeks ago she started complaining about her back and tummy hurting. So I took her to the doc. She ended up having a UTI. Since she has been on medicine, she has had 2 accidents. So have the doc check him out.

This is unusual, so I'd have him checked out by the doctor first.

Hey C.!
I agree with the moms, definitely get him checked out first for any medical issues. One mom said punishment doesn't work, which I agree with, but I also really liked Shelly K's response (though I don't think I could make my child go for that long without changing out of his wet clothes), I wouldn't consider that punishment as much as collecting data to make a more informed decision in the future.

Anyway, on to the reason that I decided to respond: Sometimes children that have been sexually abused will do this, it's that he's been potty trained so long that sent up a red flag (or maybe a pink one) to me. This is probably not the reason, but if nothing else makes any sense then you should know that this can happen. Like I said before, first rule out any medical issues, look for any traumas or changes in his routine that may have been upsetting to him, but know that this could also be a reason.

Good luck on your journey, I know this can be frustrating.
D.