4.5 Month Old Won't Nap on Her Own

You can sleep train her at 6 months - she's too young now.
It sounds like she doesn't like her bassinet. Try the crib - and try a white noise machine to lull her and camoflage any noises like traffic or the dishwasher, etc. My son sleeps much better with the white noise on - my hubby snores like a wounded buffalo. I wish I had white noise! ;)
Is the room dark enough? Too dark? My son was a tough napper at that age too - he slept best in the dang car or stroller as long as it kept moving. I took a lot of LONG, long walks.

Hey there! This sounds so familiar! I have a 4 and a half month old son as well and he goes through phases of sleeping well on a schedule and then not sleeping at all. I think there are a lot of different theories and options, but here's what worked for us... I've found that Dr. Weissbluth's book, "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" is working wonders for us. My neighbor had a colicky baby and passed it along right after my son was born. I had a really hard time letting him cry for an hour so one method that he recommends is to let the baby cry for 5 minutes, then go in and soothe, then increase the time to 10 before going in, then 15, etc until the baby falls asleep. It keeps me sane when he is crying, knowing that I can go in soon. The other thing that changed our life - the ocean wonders aquarium from fisher price. He falls asleep much faster with this! Once we got it, we only had to go into his room once, it keeps him relaxed enough to fall sleep. I don't mean for this to sound like one big product endorsement, but its what worked for us. Good luck!

Ask her doctor about gastric-reflux. It sounds like your baby has a hard time in the lying down position and may be having pain. In the meantime, you can try elevating her mattress at the head end (put a pillow under the head end of her mattress) but many children with this issue need medication to help them.

Good luck

A lot of factors come to mind here. If you are brest feeding she may not be getting enough milk. If she is bottle fed she could be a really gassy baby and you may ned to start shopping around for different formula and bottles. Babies have to learn how to self soothe themselves and the longer you do it for her the harder it will become, especially when you go back to work.

does she have any spitting up problems at all? could be gurd. that can be painful once laying down.

she could just not be a kid that likes naps. i know, scary. LOL but they all have their own schedule. your doing all things they suggest. she has a full belly when you lay her down? she could be teething? try teething tablets. by night she could be so exhausted that she's sleeping just fine then. evne with discomfort. if it continues, ask your pediatrician at your next visit. :)

Sounds a lot like my daughter. She seldom napped during the day and if so only for AT MOST 40 minutes. But we focused on night sleep and the day naps eventually came. She slept through the night by 11 weeks and has rarely had wakeful nights. During her first year she settled into a routine of 2 shorts naps a day (one for cleaning and one for cooking); the week she turned one, she switched to one nap only (about 90 minutes tops); now that she's three, she doesn't nap at all anymore - EVER! She's a 12 up 12 down kid. You might just have to go with that and if you're lucky your babe will sleep through the night. It's a trade-off, but most of my friends envy my amazing night time sleeper.
Good luck.
K. in EC

This can be very stressful I know. Not knowing what to do sometimes can leave us feeling helpless. Try getting the DVD or book "The Happiest Baby On The Block" by Dr. Harvey Karp. This book has been very helpful to alot of people I know for soothing babies. I am an infant massage educator & I always give this book or DVD to parents.

A.

I don't really understand - you said she fights sleep all day but then you said if you get her near her crib, she screams but then she sleeps 1 - 2 hours. If that's the case, take her by her crib a couple of times a day, let her scream and then fall asleep.

Hi J.,
I HIGHLY recommend reading Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Dr. Marc Weissbluth. He breaks his book into age groups and/or sleep problems. I have used it since 3 yr old my daughter was born and it is great. You didn't mention what your daughter's sleep schedule is. I would try putting her to bed at night no later than 7pm, but only if she is napping 2-3 times a day for at least one hour. If she isn't napping well, and you stated she isn't, start with an extra early bedtime for a week or so. Try getting her down for a nap within 2 hours of waking. The goal is to get her well rested so she is able to easily fall asleep. If she is overtired it is VERY difficult for her to fall asleep and stay asleep. Dr. Weissbluth explains the reasons in his book. We all have natural biological sleep rhythms and the trick is to time bedtime and nap time with them. Email if you want more info.
Sincerely,
L.

I know this is hard to hear, but you need to be strong and be consistent. At 4.5 months old, she prefers you to hold her and rock her to sleep. She knows you will do this to avoid her crying. Decide on the the schedule you want, and implement it. Put her down in her crib, tell her it is quiet or nap time, and walk away. As long as you know she is fed and has a dry diaper, and is safe, her crying won't hurt her. It will take a couple of days for her to adjust to the routine, but she will eventually fall asleep. At her age, she should be taking two naps, morning and afternoon and sleeping almost 10-12 hours at night. Again, it is important that you set the schedule and then you have to be consistent. This is hard to do while listening to her cry, but she will adapt. Good luck.

Babies are exhausting. It sounds like you might be trying to force her to sleep too much. You might have one of those kids who wants you to hold them 24/7. She's still really little, you may just have to hold her all the time for two to four more months. It's tough to do, but the emotional grounding she will get from having her needs met at this early stage will save you a lot of grief in her later years. And the next few months will soon be over.

In my opinion letting a baby cry it out should happen no earlier than six months, depending on the size of the baby, and if she's small maybe more like 8 months. And even then the crying it out should be only for nighttime sleeping; during the day you need to attend to a child's wants for the first couple of years.

Wow, that sounds tough. Have you tried wearing her in a baby carrier like an Ergo? That can really help some babies.

Hi there,

Sounds a lot like my daughter, usually a good nighttime sleeper but awful napper (even though she really needs those naps!). My suggestion is not to fight it. Either cary her in a baby carrier, have her nap when you're out in the stroller or car, or lay down with her in your bed for naps. We tried the cry-it-out for nap time for three weeks and it never worked. It was so upsetting for all of us and I regret trying it.

Part of it for me was thinking that she "should" be able to nap on her own because I heard that other babies did, and that's what all the books say. But there's only so much you can do to get someone to sleep, and after that it just makes everyone frustrated and upset. Not a good way to go to sleep. And if you really talk to mothers and read the posts here on Mamasource, sounds like many babies just don't nap easily.

Those are my two cents. I'm really sorry I don't have a solution. But they will be teenagers soon enough and sleeping too much, right? :) Good luck!!!

H.

What a tough time. I can relate as my son was colicky, but it mellowed by four months. He didn't become a good sleeper until 9 months and I know a lot of it has to do with my not knowing what to do and others telling me, "this will pass." Yeah, I thought I'd go crazy! Lack of sleep and being up on your feet constantly doesn't have to happen....I wish I knew then what I know now. A friend recommended Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Dr. Marc Weissbluth and Happiest Baby on the Block by Dr. Harvey Karp and these two books saved me. I cannot put into words what a huge difference the techniques and of course time made. Another thing I think helped was the use of a probiotic for my son's digestive system as he was gassy and very uncomfortable during and after nursing (a bottle didn't help). An osteopathic physician recommended it and after two weeks we noticed a huge difference. It is also available on the web through a few different places (I now order it online through Natren). Let me know if you want more info. And while everyone says you will survive, it is hard to imagine when you are in the middle of it. I vividly remember the complete exhaustion and helplessness I felt many a middle of the night. There is a light at the end of the tunnel...believe that and know it. A friend shared this: "The days are long, but the years are short." My son is 18 months old now and still sleeping and napping well, even after my late start in figuring out something that worked. You are ahead of me at 4.5 months. Let us know how things go down the road and know I'll be thinking of you. My heart breaks for you as I recall how I felt similarly. All the best to you.

Are you positive she isn't screaming because she wants more to eat? I know my grandson did some fighting sleep when he was about that age, and when I decided to give him a little more to eat, that settled him right down. I had given him what seemed to be a lot already, but it apparently just wasn't quite enough to satisfy him.