5 Week Old Wont Take a Pacifier

Updated on July 15, 2008
M.R. asks from Indianapolis, IN
56 answers

hi! my friend has a 5 week old daughter and she will absolutely not take a pacifier. i was just wondering if anyone had any tips on getting a baby to take a paci or other tips on consoling an upset baby. she thinks she might be a little colicky. my daughter is 8 and a half months and her being able to take a paci has been a lifesaver. i hope my friend can find some peace sometime soon.

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C.E.

answers from Cincinnati on

Rub behind her ears when you stick it in her mouth...this gets them to suck which is helpful when getting them to learn to breast feed.

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D.I.

answers from South Bend on

don't force her to take the pacifier because that will be all the less to worry about breaking her from when she gets older. If she has colic try switching to a soy formula because not all babies can tolerate the milk based such as enfamil. sometimes just rocking the baby and rubbing the baby's tummy will help to sooth the baby for a while.
D.
I am 31 and married for almost 12 yrs. my husband and I have 3 boys ages 10,7 and 4.

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A.S.

answers from Canton on

To be honest with you, that is a good thing that her child won't take the pacifer. Its harder to get them off then to get them started on it. I would take the baby to the doctor to see if the baby is colicy. But i wouldn't suggest that she force the pacifer.

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H.D.

answers from Cleveland on

I didn't want my older daughter (now 7) to have a pacifier, she now sucks her thumb ~ still! We decided with our other baby (now almost 14 months) that we would use one since we didn't want another thumbsucker. We bought tons & kept them every where ~ even different shapes because babies may not like the feel of a certain shape of the nipple (or what ever that thing is called that they actually suck on). Any way, she used one for a couple of weeks. She spit out every one we tried. Some babies just don't take pacifiers! Our little one was a bit fussy for a few weeks & we changed formulas, she has been fine ever since!

1 mom found this helpful
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P.M.

answers from Cleveland on

My oldest never took a pacifier and was colicky. A vibrating bouncy seat was the only thing that did the trick. We usually had to bounce it as it vibrated.

I have 3 kids and all had colick. The vibrating bouncy seat was a life saver for all. I actually had to buy a second one because we used the first one so much. It is my choice of baby shower gifts now.

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S.F.

answers from Indianapolis on

If the baby doesn't want it, no one should try to force the baby to take it.

Maybe she could get a swing and try that? It sure worked wonders with my colicky daughter when nothing else would.

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F.S.

answers from Indianapolis on

hi none of my three took pacifiers...which ended up being a mixed blessing when i watch the struggles others have getting rid of it! just rock her and hold her. it will pass. it'll seem like forever at the time, but of course my opinion, she'll end up with a baby that will console and soothe herself. maybe try music or a lighted crib thingie to help console her. when it gets to be too much, remind her it's okay to set the baby in her crib to cry and give herself (the mom) a 2 - 5 minute time out. i was a single mom with my first one and remember my mom advicing me from long distance to take a lap or two around my house.

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K.H.

answers from Mansfield on

Be glad they donn't take a pacifer, its harder to break later on. My son was colicky the first six months of his life. A lot of rocking and singing, also I have digital cable and there are radio stations on it. I would put him in his swing or bouncy seat and put on soft rock. He would eventually quiet down. Colic is hard because there is no cure or right or wrong answer, just have patience and it will pass. Also, if she spits up alot it might be gerd and she should talk to her doctor. They can elevate the head of her crib as well as change formula or if it is bad put her on a prescription.

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J.F.

answers from Columbus on

I had great success using some of the suggestions from the video "The Happiest Baby on the Block." Also gentle bouncing on an excercise ball while holding the baby securely in my arms worked like a charm.

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A.C.

answers from Dayton on

My eldest took a paci and it too was a lifesaver. It's been no easy task to get her off of it! My second would NEVER take a paci, which is a good thing. We too had to come up with other ways to console her and the one thing that helped us was jiggling her on our lap, stomach down. When reclined in a chair we would put her stomach down over our legs and either rock her back and forth or jiggle our legs. She ALWAYS falls asleep. Happiest Baby On the Block also has some great maneuvers that worked for our eldest when the paci wasn't enough!

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S.H.

answers from Cleveland on

if that baby doesn't want a pacifier- thank the lord!- its just one less thing to breack him of! my daughter NEVER took one and when she was coliky we just walked her around the house, if it is colic it should happen around the same time everyday and last for a few hours, if its at diff. times every day chances are its not colic, but something else like a reaction to formula, or the amount of iron in her/his diet.

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K.E.

answers from Lafayette on

If the baby is colicky, have her give her Gripe Water. It can be found at Walgreen's. It is a natural solution, which was a life-saver for my son. It comes in a blue box, and the brand name is Baby's Bliss. Good luck!

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H.C.

answers from Indianapolis on

Some kids just do not sooth themselves by sucking. It's not the end of the world. Trust me, they are so hard to get rid of that it might actually be better in the long run. And please do not suggest to her to dip it in anything sugary to get her to take it. You can rot your baby's teeth, yes, even before they come in!! That is a terrible suggestion and any doctor or dentist will tell you the same. Try a small silky blanket that she can rub on her cheek or run her fingers over. If she is colicky, there's not a whole lot that is going to help right now, it just takes time. Good luck.

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T.T.

answers from Indianapolis on

We used a bouncy seat that has a little vibration setting on it, I wan to say Fisher Price Aquarium. It also played soft music and had a bubbling noise. It worked sometimes. We actually watched a WHOLE movie one time when my son was a couple months old because he enjoyed his swing. It worked one time at least! LOL My boys didn't like the paci all that much either. We chucked it after awhile.

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D.R.

answers from Cincinnati on

Hi M., with my daughter I just kept buying different brands of pacis until I found one that she liked. We tried all the small ones that said they were for newborns thinking that the others would be too big, but it ended up she liked ones that were bigger(probably because she was being breastfed). My friends baby liked the same ones too! I think they were the playtex ones. They have the big nipples on them (they do have them for different age groups, but they are bigger than most of the others) and there are three different colors on one paci, and usually come with two in the package.

It is not a bad thing for babies to have a paci you just need to get them off of it by about 8 or 9 mos. of age or earlier or it is hard to get them off of them! Trust me I know, My youngest is almost 3 now and whenever she sees one she still wants hers back. She cries for it when she is sick too. But when they are little like your friends baby it is completely normal for them to want to suck a lot...this may not be the problem though...but it's worth a try!

Oh, I also wanted to tell you that I have heard that if a baby is collicky that they like what they call 'white noise' like running a vacuum or sitting them near (not on) a running washing machine...it is the noise or vibration possibly that soothes them. Or maybe she could try music, like a lullaby CD!
Good Luck, let us know how it goes okay?! Have a great day! :)

D. R.

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S.P.

answers from Cleveland on

Both of my childern didn't take pacifers either. If she doesn't take one don't force her. Might it just isn't meant for her to have one.

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H.K.

answers from Indianapolis on

My daughter (now one) wouldn't take a pacifier for the longest time. You could try to hold it in her mouth and she would push it right back out. It wasn't until about four months old that sher really took it. The good side is that she doesn't need it all the time, so I think it will be easier to break her of it. I would say just keep trying to give it to her. There are other ways to soothe, holding rocking and singing seemed to work the best. Or try a toy that can become "the comfort toy." Please don't put anything on the pacifier that can be bad for gums and teeth.

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M.S.

answers from Cincinnati on

i have two kids one one a binky boy and one would not. you just have to find what they like if they wont take it , they won't. i normally just put my non binky boy in his bed. he cried it out. if he was fed and changed and felt fine they he just fall asleep in his bed after he would cry. he does not have anything he likes.

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D.M.

answers from Cincinnati on

M.,
Be glad that your friend's baby won't take the pacifier. She will not have a struggle when this child is older to stop taking that paci! Tell her to swaddle her baby in a blanket, hold her tight, and rock her. Sometimes just holding the baby and walking around the house will help. And some babies just require more to eat, or they eat smaller amounts more frequently.

I'm a happily married Christian with three wonderful children and two grandsons. Our oldest grandson (age 2 years) would not take a pacifier at all. Our second grandson (age 4 months) takes it once in a while, but he prefers the real bottle. He is the one who eats small amounts but more frequently.

Good luck, D.

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S.D.

answers from Indianapolis on

Why is she trying to force a bad habit on her daughter who doesn't want to start it? My son's has been a thorn in our side for a long time as he accidently or purposely loses it and we ahve to go in, find it outside the crib and give it back to him in the middle of the night. I sure wish I had never given it to him!!! We didn't have trouble until he was about a year old, so I guess you haven't gone through it all yet, but everyone I know who gave a pacifier went through this at some point.

Tell her to swaddle her and holder her with her arm under her stomach to put a little pressure on it and it will help the colic. She can also get "Little Tummies" drops at the grocery store or drug store or Hylands "Colic tablets" from Wild Oats that can help.

Good Luck to her:)

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R.

answers from Indianapolis on

not all babies want or need a pacifier. Please don't suggest to your friend that something is wrong if the baby does not use one. Yes they are great if a baby wants one, but if the baby has another way of self calming then great.
If your friend would try swaddlling the baby, keeping its hands free and then even using the vacuum cleaner or some other noise in the house that she might have done while pregnant. Babies respond to the stimulus and even fnd it soothing. Colicky babies need to eat a little less and burp more often and be fed more often. She might also rub her tummy after each feeding.
Just remember the best way to take care of a new baby is to make sure you are taking care of yourself so you are relaxed and happy. Then the baby will be relaxed and happy
Tell your friend all babies are different but there isn't one you can spoil, so hold that baby and rock it until it settles done when it is fussy

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D.P.

answers from Cleveland on

My son wouldn't take a pacifier when he was a baby either (he is 10 now). When ever he would start getting fussy I would lay him on his belly across my legs an pat his back or his butt. He would stop fussing within seconds. It really helped. I also had to change his formula. He had a very sensitive stomache. I put him on Carnation Good Start. It calmed him down a lot. I ended up using the same formula for my other kids when they were born. I hope the best for your friend. Good luck to her.

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J.S.

answers from Terre Haute on

Nothing wrong with a baby not taking the pacifier. My oldest took the pacifier all the way up until she was 4 weeks. My middle child wouldn't even take a bottle or the pacifier. My youngest never touched a pacifier unless its to play with it and she's 2 now. Its just a toy to her. Try a diffrent pacifier if you like, but I wouldn't force on in a childs mouth. Because than they will become very DEPENDANT on it. Is that what you want? I think rocking the baby, singing to her and holding her and talking, reading a book something. Just a voice can sooth a child, but stay calm. I know it can become very NERVE RACKING..oh my do I ever. Sometimes a good pat on the back or rub, or even a bath will sooth a baby, stroke her hair and take the tip of your fingers and gently and lightly stroke her eyebrows and eyes and cheeks like your running water over her face, but not. If your child is colicky, gas X for babies or even a peppermint water bottle will work. Take her for a car ride or walk in the stroller (if its nice, for the stroller). We did that with my oldest when she quit taking the pacifier. I know patience wears thin, wait till they get older when You can't always keep an eye on them. My oldest is now 11 almost 12, my middle child is 10. Just think right now, it might be trying and hard, wait till they can talk and talk back and sass you and tell you what to do and how to do it and when. Or try all that. I love my girls and they now know that I won't put up with it, but they do still try it. Good Luck and I'll keep you in my prayers.

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K.B.

answers from Cincinnati on

My son never took a pacifier, and I was actually grateful! :) (one less thing to have to break lol). My neice never liked her pacifier either. My son was much happier than my niece who had some major stomache issues. They just walked her around, and did whatever they could to make her happy. And when they couldn't, and began to get frusterated they called in reinforcements, or simply put her in her cribe and ran the vaccum for a few minutes. (For those babies parents, the sound of the vaccum can be so relaxing!) Some babies just don't like to suck on things that doesn't have food coming out of it!
I'm sure she has tried, but we used bouncer seats/vibrating chairs and swings to help comfort my little one. He also loved to be on the ground or reclined on the bobby! My neice simply loved sitting in her car seat!

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M.B.

answers from Evansville on

And that's a bad thing? Neither of my children took pacifiers and I was greatful that I didn't have to try to break that habit later on. We had great success with a baby swing. Both of my children would suck on my pinky for a small amount of time just to calm themselves.

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J.N.

answers from Indianapolis on

M.,

It is not absolutely necessary for a child to suck on a pacifier. I personally believe that it is better if they don't! Children are born with natural sucking abillity. As far as colic is concerned, check with the Pediatrician to obtain proper treatment for it.

God's blessings!
Nana (J. N)

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S.E.

answers from Cleveland on

Put it in his mouth and sort of take it out. Rub on the roof of his mouth. Rub his cheek while it is in there. Don't give up right away. He has to learn about it.

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H.A.

answers from Cleveland on

Honestly my two children only took it a couple times and spit it out just as I did as a baby .....I believe it has Nothing At All to do with heridity but I believe that if a baby does not want a paci , then so be it! Swaddling yes is a great idea ...if that does not work try rocking the baby in a rocker with mother holding the child or father as well, also try soft music or sound machines ( waves /ocean/nature etc)...or warm bath...massage is tops in my books ...and using lavender scented baby oil is great !
I am not understanding though,please never force a infant to take on to something that is there and is a means of soothing ( pacifiers are to soothe infants) and I know that I have read and been told they are not for toddlers or children , after 12 mo's of age they should be weaned from the paci completely , Due to dental reasons ...again though I have not had to worry over this so - I would just kick it to the curb!
( sorry if I offend anyone with the above statements..but its true...and I am not being bias)+++
Blessings!

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S.K.

answers from Cleveland on

my son never took one either, he nurses instead. does she nurse? it comforts him everytime:)

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K.D.

answers from Toledo on

My daughter was very picky with the pacifiers she took. She was in the NICU for 3 weeks and they used the Soothie brand. After that, my daughter wouldn't take any other kind. Sometimes it isn't that the child doesn't like a paci, it just takes some trial and error as to which ones they will take. The other suggestion is to just dip the paci in some sugar water...maybe the baby will take it then. Not a medical thing to do...just a suggestion that may help. Just tell her to hang on and try as many pacis as she can. I recommend the Soothie brand though...or if the baby takes a bottle, put cotton in a nipple and have her suck on that. Hope she finds peace, colicky babies are a real challenge.

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S.K.

answers from South Bend on

My son who is now 11mo did not take a pacifer for a long time. He then did but only a certain one.. when we lost it, he went 2months without one.. and no problems then a relative found it at their house... he has it now but I let him b/c he is teething..

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L.C.

answers from Cleveland on

really..in the long run, it's is probably better that the baby not take a pacifier as then there is not need to wean. My son would never take a pacifier and the doctor told me some kids take to it, and some do not. I just remember when my brother was weaning his daughter what a pain it was....almost as bad as potty training;)

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A.B.

answers from Columbus on

There is nothing wrong with a baby not taking a pacifier! It could be that the baby is colic and it could mean that its milk is not satisfying it. A colicy baby usually has the same routine that it is fussy. A baby that isn't satisfied with its milk is fussy most of the time. There are gas drops for colic. The doctor could change its formala if it is hungary.

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A.M.

answers from Indianapolis on

Why would you ever want a baby to take a paci they didn't want? If the baby has colic you just have to wait it out till about twelve weeks. The child will learn to self soothe without a paci and then you won't need to worry about keeping the disgusting things clean and weaning! My first wouldn't take one either and I didn't push it. With my second I didn't even think to give it to her. It was one less thing to worry about and keep track of with a baby! Good luck with the colic.

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T.F.

answers from Fort Wayne on

My daughter wouldn't take a pacifier either and it is a blessing in disguise. My son took the pacifier from the get go and getting him to get rid of it is tiresome and h*** o* both him and me. If the baby is coliky, unfortunately, you have to wait that one out. Swings and other forms of distraction will be your best bet along with a lot of patience.
Good luck

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M.H.

answers from Fort Wayne on

My youngest daughter was colicky, and she would not take a pacifier either. I think for one I breast fed her and she wanted nothing to do with a plastic thing in her mouth. Our Dr suggested the baby gas-x and it helped a lot. But mostly you just have to suffer through it, it will go away. I wouldn't push the pacifier on her, if she dont want it. They are not good for their teeth development. I always would lay my daughter on a heating pad, or we had what we called a bed buddy. (you can make it with a pair of new tube socks and a big bag of rice, just take one sock and fill it up with the rice and stich up the end, take the other sock and stuff the filled one into it stiched end in first and then stich up that sock. You stick it in the microwave for a min and a half and it stays warm and forms to the babys body.) This was the only thing that helped my daughter other than the little help that the baby gas-x did. I hope it all works out. But paitience is the only real cure!

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N.R.

answers from Elkhart on

I see you got a lot of requests. If you already got this advise I apologize I didn't read through them all. My oldest would not take a pacifier and while I was glad not to have to break him of that habit, there was also plenty of times where I was at my wits end. While he would not take a pacifier he would take my pinky and my husbands pinky to suck on. While it could be a little uncomfortable because my hand was turned upside down so that the pad of my finder was at the roof of his mouth, it almost always worked to help him calm down

good luck

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P.R.

answers from Indianapolis on

And why is the refusal to accept a pacifer bad??? I have raised 3 children and none of them used one. I can't see where this is a problem. I see it as a blessing, one less thing to break them of later on.

Colic is colic, a different matter all together. There are several items available now to assist with colic. Check with your pharmacy or physician regarding colic.

Fussing is normal. Holding, rocking, singing, swings, etc. will usually stop that. Had one we had to use a car ride for on occasion, another one that a warm bath would soothe.

PamR

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A.B.

answers from Indianapolis on

Neither my son who is 4 now nor my daughter who is now 6 months ever took a pacifier. My son only took it once and then never again and my daughter always spat it out when I tried. Oh well, one less thing I need to wean her off. My son had colic and GERD and if that baby actually does have colic a pacifier will NOT make her stop crying during her colic spells, nothing will. It will just go away on its own between 3 and 4 months. I wouldn't force a pacifier on any baby. If they don't want it then they will soothe themselves in other ways.

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L.F.

answers from Fort Wayne on

Some babies won't take a pacifier. None of my sons would. Do research on the net to find ways of handling a colicy baby. It does go away after a while. Good luck.

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C.W.

answers from Cincinnati on

Why would she want her to have one? My boys NEVER liked pacifers and NEVER sucked their thumbs either.

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J.H.

answers from Dayton on

M.,
I don't know if it will work for you, but when my daughter (now 3) was a baby, we would bounce on an exercise ball. She wouldn't calm down unless we were walking with her, but she would calm down when we were sitting on an exercise ball and bouncing up and down. It wasn't a hard bounce, but it was a lot easier on our backs and allowed us to rest a bit as well.

As far as the pacifier, I don't have any suggestions. Sometimes children just don't want them, for others it is a learned behavior. I'm sure some people will say that it is better to not use the pacifier, but I completely understand that having a paci is so helpful in helping a baby to become calm.
Good luck!

J. H.

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R.N.

answers from Columbus on

tell her to just work through it.... I have 4 kids one took a pacifier and it was totally difficult to get her off it. the remaining 3 never took one and they and their teeth are better for it.

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K.R.

answers from Dayton on

Neither one of mine would take one either. Actually a blessing down the road. I hate it when I see a 2,3 or even 4 year old with a pacifier and am so grateful I didn't have to deal with weaning. My brother and his wife had such a struggle with their third. I know it can be kind of hard but hang in there. You will actually be thankful later on.

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A.H.

answers from Fort Wayne on

I have a 4 month old daughter, she never was really colicky, but had her evening fussy period at 4-8 weeks. We did a lot of walking as she wasn't interested in a paci either. She never took to it until we introduced a bottle of expressed breastmilk to her. Then when I went back to work at 12 weeks, the sitter was able to use it to help her go to sleep. She liked the green Soothie at first and then switched to a plastic one after we took a long trip down to Savannah, GA to see my brother before he shipped out to Iraq. Let me tell you, having a paci is a lifesaver when traveling. I have also been told it is easier to wean a child off a paci than a thumb. Makes sense, you can't throw a thumb away! But, seriously, we only use it now when she is getting a little hungry and we aren't able to nurse right away or to get her to calm down when in a car seat. She's usually more interested in her musical toys, bouncey seats, or swing. Good luck!

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T.P.

answers from Canton on

Some babies just don't like pacifiers. I wouldn't try to force her to take it. Try rocking her different motions, in mama's arms. Do the bounce, the side to side, the swooping motion. Try bouncy seat or a swing with proper head support. You can try a car ride.

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T.S.

answers from Columbus on

I have a 9 month old who still won't take the paci. She is breastfed, so I think that is part of it. Your friend may want to try different pacis until she finds one that her baby will like. Some just won't take it. I have 6, and 2 would not take a paci at all. If the colic is bad, gripe water was a lifesaver for me.

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K.V.

answers from Terre Haute on

I too had a colicky baby that would not take a pacie. She was nursed exclusively and hated the bottle too. It was the cold rubber she was objecting too. Baby, husband and I were desperate for sleep. It was our pediatrician that suggested she suck my thumb... She would settle down with my thumb, nail side down, in her mouth and go to sleep. I only had to do this a short time.

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L.G.

answers from Lima on

First, have the mother raise the head end of the crib about 3-4 inches.
Anti-gas drops!!!!!! Were a lifesaver for me. The Wal-Mart brand worked better than the expensive brand did. Do NOT be afraid of how much gas drops to give them. My pediatrician said you can give 3 droppers full and it won't hurt them.
IF you have trouble getting the baby to take the drops, put it in the bottle. That way you know for sure they are getting it.

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S.S.

answers from Canton on

Both my children never took a pacifier. Actually I think it was a great deal of relief! If the baby is a little colicky that may be another issue but some babies just aren't interested in that constant sucking on a paci. I used to work in a peds office and we used to always say don't force it because it is 10 times harder to wean them off of it. If the baby if colicky there are diff positions when feeding and after feeding the baby that do help BUT colicky babies are a handful and at times it is a long road of late nights and just a lot of patience. Your friend may want to check the formula too at times that is the case but a 5 weeks it is so hard at to change formulas a lot isnt always good for a babies tummy. Tell her good luck and hope all goes well!

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K.H.

answers from Indianapolis on

None of my 3 kids (8,5 and 3 months) have ever taken a pacifier... no amount of forcing would help! I have found that my kids like blankets (really silky edges). They hold them to their face and just kind of rub them on their cheeks. So cute!

Your friend could try putting the baby in a bouncy seat or car seat on the dryer. She could also try bouncing with her baby instead of rocking. My youngest does not like to be rocked, she likes to be bounced while having her butt patted!

If the baby is colicky, there isn't a whole lot that will help!

Good Luck!

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J.S.

answers from Columbus on

I went throught the exact same thing with my son. I would not push paci if she does not want it. My son was Colik and the doctor swithched is formula from similac to isomil and after that he was just fine .

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K.C.

answers from Columbus on

I, too had colicky babies! Taking a paci didn't always work. What did work at times was turning on the vacuum, turning on running water...the shower, the sink, and sitting the baby in a vibrating bouncy seat. These methods aren't a cure for collic, but they brought a few moments of peace and quiet for me. Colic is just something that the baby has to outgrow, unfortunately.

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L.G.

answers from Cleveland on

hello, if she takes a bottle just try giving her the nipple and ring without the rest of the bottle to suck on. someone told me that colic is no more than the baby knowing that the parents are nervous or anxious, i am not in total agreement on that but if the parents are, it may make the baby fussy??? play some music or hum as they hold the baby close so she can feel the vibration. there is a toy like that on the market that mimics being in the womb....hearing mommas heartbeat ect....horses know when someone is afraid of them?? so baby may know too??? hope that helps... i see a lot of people bashing pacifiers, if it works it works if not it doesn't. it is survival of the parents. later on down the road is another story and if the parents worst battle is a pacifier related one than i say, whoptido.... i can guarantee my daughter wont be in high school with one...or not for long...same with potty training age....ask any pediatrition...there is no magic age they should be trained by....the last bit was for all those who bash pacifiers....
lee ann

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D.K.

answers from Indianapolis on

HONESTLY...if they won't....don't worry about it. Don't try to force them to do something they don't want or from the baby's standpoint....isn't going to solve the problem.

You should get a book on infant massage. WWWWWWWWONDERFUL! I used this when my nieces and nephews were young and I used to nanny. They are in college now. My nephews STILL talk about getting head massages from Aunt D.. Abbie, my roommate's five year old asks me all the time to give her foot massages. AWESOME STUFF. Use it as your FIRST option, rather than the last. You'll be glad you did....AND it's a different type of bonding with the child.

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R.K.

answers from Dayton on

Colic calm (http://www.coliccalm.com/) took the edge off (sometimes) with our baby who was colicky. Also, you might want to check with a chiropractor, like April Dunnington in Centerville, who works with babies who have colic. She was great with our girl. Good luck!

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