5 Year Old and Night Terrors

Updated on January 31, 2011
B.F. asks from Trumbull, CT
15 answers

I am at my wits end! My 5 year old son is waking with Night Terrors every night. It usually occurs between 1 and half to two hours after he falls asleep. It is awful. He's not really awake, but moans, cries, screams, kicks, bangs his head, hands and feet on the walls. He does not want to be touched or comforted, it makes it worse. He scratches at his skin and tears at his clothes. he says he is itching. Occasionally, I am able to lay him back down to sleep, but mostly he will rant for up to 20 minutes! I have to take him out of the room and put on the TV to snap him out of it. It is heartbreaking and exhausting. I am due tomorrow with baby #2 and I can't believe I will have to be dealing with both children in the night.
The terrors can happen multiple times in the night. I took him to the doctor to discuss it, she offered NO advice. She said, it hurts me more than it hurts him as a child is not really aware and he will eventually grow out of it. EVENTUALLY? The boy seems possessed while it's happening and it scares me. I don't know what to do! I have gotton rid of his bed (which he says he hates) I have washed all sheets and clothes with hypoallergenic detergent so to ease any "itching". I give him clariton and oatmeal baths and apply aquaphor to his skin each night before bed to ensure he is comfortable.
Does anyone have any experience with this? Any advice or tips on how to handle it? Jude is a normal, healthy, happy child who lives a very wonderful life. The only two stressors he may have right now is the new baby coming (which he is outwardly ECSTATIC about) and we took him off the pacifier 4 weeks ago. His conscience waking up has decreased since being taken off, but terrors have replaced it. Anyone who can help me has my deepest gratitude!!!

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R.Y.

answers from New York on

As for the itching, when I get very stress or overtired I get itchy skin. Benadryl and Allegra help me but Claratin doesn't.

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D.S.

answers from New York on

Dear B.,

I am not familiar with night terrors to that extreme. My son would occasionally yell out in his sleep but when i would go to him he was sound asleep. I am thinking if he is asleep maybe you should do like to they do with sleepwalkers just stay near him to make sure he doesn't hurt himself but let him be and maybe he will come out of this on his own. Maybe by trying to comfort him you are making it worse. You said he does not want to be touched so maybe it is making him more upset. I would just stay near his bed so he doesn't fall out and hurt himself and see if he can work it through on his own. I would also be careful of what he is watching on tv, sometimes it can be the most innocent thing that is disturbing them and then they go to sleep and dream about it. My son saw a clown once on tv in a show I was watching and he had nightmares all night about the clown. Maybe try a nice calming story before bed and see if it helps. Good luck!!

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A.C.

answers from New York on

you might try working with a homeopathic doctor - very good at treating things like this

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J.V.

answers from Syracuse on

What does he eat before bed? My son will be three in a couple of weeks. He is potty training...well sorta...likes m&m's. If he has too many before bedtime, we noticed he has nightmares...talks, cries, screams, rolls around, hits, etc. We finally figured out that if he has chocolate before bed, he has this reaction. Now he only gets 1 or 2 m&m's if he goes potty, and we haven't had a nightmare since.

Does he watch TV before bed? I've heard that this can cause nightmares too.

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V.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

My daughter is going to be five in three days she has been having the same problem. Although it is not so bad like you described your child hers can be very scary as well she wakes up screaming at night and in a daze as if she is having a very bad nightmare but the scary thing is she is not awake so i start moving her i even put her in the shower...Im new at this but im reading its due to sleep deprived and when this night thing occurs do not try to move them just soothe them and explain that everything is going to be alright...all in all its a very scary situation...Hope this helped a little.

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L.G.

answers from New York on

Hi B.
you have my empathy because I just went through night terrors with my 4 1/2 year old daughter. Although my Emma was not as bad as your Jude with them. My own pediatrician recommended washing her face with a cold washrag. Like ice cold. His reasoning is that it will wake her up. My husband did some research and the istes he found suggested placing the feet in ice water. The washcloth is easier, same effect.

We also learned in our research that they sem to be bought on by stress. Emma started after her brother was born in September. She had also started PreK , witnessed a huge blow up screaming match between my dad and me, dealt with me dealing with depression in addition to the baby coming home.

Does he have a CD player in his room? My daughter listens to soothing music at night and it helps somewhat. Classical, Celtic, New Age, Lullabyes, all are relaxing and soothing. And most CD players have a repeat button so he can have it on all night if you are OK with that. A regular nighttime ritual is good even without night terrors. A bath, (try using lavender products. May help and can't hurt) stories, prayers (If you do that) and a special toy to snuggle with tucked in with him. Also talk with his teachers who may can alert you to any issues at school that he may not be talking about.

Good luck and please let us know what happens

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S.E.

answers from Albany on

I have a new 10 year old who just recently outgrew the night terrors. He, too, woke hysterical after only about 1 hour asleep-we knew if he slept past that magical one hour point we were home free. We found they occurred more often when he was buried in blankets, so cutting him down to very light pajamas or a longish cotton t-shirt with a duvet help immensely. Unfortunately little else did. The severity was lessened when we would ask him what he saw (versus trying to convince him he didn't) and then "help" him to "fight" off whatever it was. He, to this day, is positive we are all making it all up, rememebering absolutely nothing. I must agree with your pediatrician, it is hurting you much more than him. Best of luck.

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J.H.

answers from New York on

Hi B.,

I am so sorry that you have to go through this with you little one. My son had night terrors and it was awful. I felt the same way as you did, comepletely helpless. I took Brendon to the doctors and the doctor that seen him was awesome. He explained what was happening in terms I could understand. He said that their brain wakes up before their eyes and it is a scary thing for them. He told me to give him melatonin at night before be and he never had another night terror again. I hope this helps you and your little guy.
Good luck and Happy Halloween :)
J.

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K.I.

answers from New York on

Hi B.,

Turn the tv off.
If your household is happy and healty and he is being taken care of properly - than it could be the tv.

I was home with my daughter and did not put on the tv for a week and the night terrors went away. I put tv back on for a week and the night terrors came back.
No more tv for her.
Put in positive movies with minimal if any violence and happy endings.

My daughter was having that problem until I stopped her from watching tv and the problem stopped immediatly.
Even now - she is twelve and she can only watch tv on the weekends and for 1hour to 2hours.
And she can only watch does hours after she finish studing on the weekends.

Also many children shows have an underline violence, that causes children anxioty.

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K.R.

answers from New York on

I haven't dealt with it, but was looking it up a while ago when I was wondering if my daughter was having them. Seems two things are MAJOR helpers:

Keeping the feet uncovered - which correlates to what the other poster said about not being too warm.

"Waking" them before it happens. You said it always happens around the same time. Just before the time it generally happens, go in and rub your child's back or belly and whisper things like, "Mommy's here. Everything is ok. Sleep peacefully". Not enough that they wake up eyes open, but enough that they stir a bit and realize you are there. That often helps them get past whatever is scaring them.

Good luck to you!!!!!!!!!!

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C.T.

answers from New York on

Hi B.,

Pray and ask God to help you with your son.

C.

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D.B.

answers from New York on

Hi B.,

We experienced the same thing with our daughter, although "they" say that it is typically seen in boys. While your Pediatrician probably wasn't very helpful, she is right, in that they have no memory of the terror. Stressors precipitate the problem. It sounds like the weaning of his pacifier may be it, essentially it was part of him his whole life, and now he is trying to cope without it. Pacifiers help children to "self soothe". Although this seems very difficult, it will end. I know the fact that you are about to deliver probably is very difficult on you and your body. Take heart, this too shall past!
I hope that the new baby will be a great night sleeper for you : )

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C.R.

answers from Syracuse on

I've been there too! and yes, they will go away...it is usually brought on by stress(and I don't mean that in a negative way...for them CHANGE is stress...and change happens) My 3rd son had terrors for about 2 months right before the birth of our 4th son and as we were moving into a house, they left as quickly as they started and we did have about a 2 week relapse about a month later. Yes, it is scarey and heartbreaking to watch but make yourself feel better and ask him the next day if he remembers "waking up"(I wouldn't tell him what happened)he'll tell you no...so you can release that pain. The one thing in your post that stuck out to me was the allergy medication....some have terrors/nightmares as a side effect....I know my son(not the one w/terrors) was on Singular and so was my friends son and she had to cut his dose in half because it gave him terrors...she ended up taking him off it completely...just keep your son safe and as frustrating as it is, it will pass.

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M.B.

answers from Rochester on

B.,
Did you wean him from the paci or did he just go cold turkey?

This might all be fallout from the paci going - or it may not.

Does he watch TV? Might he have seen something scary that he forgot about but 'remembers'?

Have you also thought about getting a second opinion? Have you looked up anything online?

I'm sure many people will tell you not to go back on the paci, but I think it will be a judgment call on your part. A second opinion and more info on the night terrors will only help you, too.

Good luck!
M.

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K.C.

answers from New York on

Hi B.,
I too have a soon who had the night terrors! I can relate to your feelings of helplessness. IT WILL END! Unfortunately not for a while. My son is now 17. he started with the terrors between 3-4years old and it took us till he was almost 5 to figure it out. He would wake us up by crying and he would be shaking and he was acting as if he was lost. He would be calling out for "MOMMY" and I was holding him. Very scary!! anyway. I would do like you and try to walk him around and usually i would just say come on lets go to the bathroom and usually after that he would calm down and then we would cuddle and he would fall back asleep. I would say they started to decrease around 7-8 years old. But Anthony did not have them every night like Jude. he would at most twice a week but usually once or twice every week or two. He then would get them like once a month then every few months. I think the last one he had was around 12 and it was a good year between. That one took me by surprise and I hoped that he wasnt starting again, and he didnt. There was no rhyme or reason as to when they would happen. I too tried to place life situations together with them but never had anything concrete. No great answers just know that they will stop one day and that he never remembered any of them even when he got older. So that was my saving grace! Also I made sure that if and when he started having sleep overs with family and friends that everyone knew what to expect. It did happen a few times but everyone was a helpful and compassionate parent who handled it very well. and they thanked me because otherwise they said they would not have known what to do. I was greatful because I did not want this to interefere with his childhood memories. So I hope this helps a little cause there is no real solution that I am aware of but know that you are not alone and they should not affect your son. I do wonder though i also have 2 daughters and never had this with them so is this just with boys? I have never met anyone else who experience this? Sorry cant offer more than understanding. Good Luck and congratulations on the new baby.

I am a mother of three wonderful chilren 17 year old son (looking at colleges - gonna miss him!), two daughters 11 & 13 (please help!!) Married to my best friend and husband for 20 years, we have 2 dogs and 2 cats and a rabbit! I also work full time as a veterinary technician. LOVE EVERY MINUTE OF IT!!!

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