5 Year Old and Not Wanting to Go to School

It's sounds like maybe she is still tired in the morning and having a hard time waking up. My daughter was like that as well. Try putting her to bed early and see if that works.

My other suggestion is a very non-traditional approach but what I started doing was just dressing her in what she was going to wear the next day such as leggings, atheletic style clothings, comfy shirts, etc. Not jeans or anything with buttons or zippers or they'll be uncomfortable. Also, nothing that will wrinkle. This way all my DD had to do was get up and brush her teeth. I would do a quick combing of the hair and stick in either a clip, headband, or rubber band. All that was left was socks and shoes which I already had waiting by the door and jackets if it was cold out.

First of all make sure she's getting 10 hours of sleep! put her to bed earlier if she's not. then figure out if it's not liking school (whole 'nother problem...) or not wanting to get ready. then try to make mornings more fun for her. Make a cool chart for her to check off each thing she as she does it, brush teeth, brush hair, get dressed etc. Play beat the timer or beat Mommy "who can get dressed first, brush teeth fastest, etc make a cardboard cut out of her that she pins her outfit to the night before, including socks, hair ties or whatever. Have two cool toothbrushes for her to choose from. On the weekend make some healthy muffins together but call them breakfast cupcakes and frost them with a cream cheese, jam mixture.
Mornings are THE most stressful for moms with kids!!! hope things get better!

Make sure you have her help pick out the clothes the night before. (Less stress for the morning). Maybe set a timer so she know how much time she has to do these things and make it into a game of "beat the timer". She isn't a "bad girl" or "good girl", she just sometimes makes bad choices. Taking away toys isn't always the best if it's not something they really treasure. What does she really enjoy? Bike riding, watching tv, playing video games, going to the park? Figure out what that is and that's what you need to be consistent about taking away. That being said, try to focus on the positive like making a sticker chart for when she does cooperate. Have you asked her why she doesn't want to go to school?

Ok, this is not bad parenting or rebellion. This could be anxiety. I am going through this with my 6 year old. He always loved school and all of the sudden he was refusing to go. I thought to myself what did I do wrong that this kid thinks he has the right to refuse to go! I would literally drag him in the office crying. He would run away from me or hold on to anything he could to keep from being carried in. When I would pick him up he said he had a great day and loves his school. We were punishing him by taking away toys, tv time, putting him in his room, etc. That made the battle worse. Google "school refusal" and "anxiety in children". It was an eye openner for me. We saw a therapist who helped me to react better to the situation. She told me to say, "I know that you are feeling very anxious right now. I know you don't want to feel this way." He is a perfectionist and that causes a lot of anxiety. I also had to get very calm in the mornings (a tough one with 4 kids and myself to get out the door). I do more things at night so there's less to do in the morning. Most importantly I don't show that I am anxious about anything in the morning. If your daughter needs you to stop what you are doing and help her dress, eat, etc. then do it for now. With some research and understanding I was able to turn my son's behavior around really quickly. I hope you can too. I could go on and on, so if you have specific questions send me a message. Good Luck!! :-) P.S. My husband and I thought it was a behavior problem like your husband does. I had to prove to my husband it was an emotional problem and punishment wasn't the answer.

It is normal for children at either age 4 or 5 to start rebelling. HOpefully it is not anything at school. At that age, I had a reward system as a colorful chart. I would have simple jobs: make bed, get dressed, brush teeth, pick up toys at the end of day. (I would help with making bed). At the end of the day, we would put smiley faces or whatever sticker they like in each box of what they did. They also do not get priveldges (watching T.V. or whatever they like to do) unless their jobs are complete. We talk about everything at the end of the day and how they could improve. If she does not get dressed, do not threaten or get upset, just give a postive incentive (time to get dressed and then you will get a happy face sticker on your chart). Give her time and if it does not happen, calmly dress her yourself and at the end of the day, explain how she is becoming a "big girl" and big girls dress themselves and she can get a sticker if she does. If the stickers don't work as an incentive, then you may want to extend the reward - if she gets all happy faces for all of the jobs, she gets to do something special (get icecream, extra playtime with Mom or Dad, T.V. time, etc. She should choose) You can choose something material (toy from the $1 Store) but it doesn't have to be. Kids want attention even if it is negative attention, so always make it a positive incentive. "If you get dressed for school, you will see you friends at school", etc. To get a colorful chart, you can do a search online and print one out, they have free ones to print. Or you can go to a local Teaching supply store and buy one there. They have ones with reusable stickers too. Your daughter is still a good girl. Kids will go through phases and test the waters :)

I would talk to her teacher about it. My son did this same thing in Kindergarten and again this year at the start of 1st grade. This year it was just that he was having a hard time with summer ending (all that play time!). Now that school has been going on a while he has forgotten to complain about school and is enjoying it. Last year was a different story...he was impossible to get ready in the mornings! I started having him sleep in his clothes for the next day. I made him a chart with pictures of the things he had to do each morning. Get up, brush teeth, eat breakfast, get on coat/shoes with no fuss. No distractions (video games or computer or anything) allowed in the mornings. We talked to him about what the consequences would be if he did not do each of these things. If I had to count to 3 and got to the number three then the consequences were put in place. We became really black and white about it and he shaped up. For us it worked to take away riding his scooter or bike for the day - you have to find something your daughter loves to do. This year he still hates getting up in the morning but he is very good about doing what he is supposed to.

Does she have fun at school when she is there ?

I was just talking about this with another friend. I wonder if it is a choice thing. Not giving her enough power to pick her clothes out and putting a lot of the decisions of getting ready for school on her. Maybe the night before to really get it organized prior to the morning. Pick out a new toothbrush she wants that she can't wait to use.....

Another thing that came to mind is......... have her go to school in her pjs. If she is not ready ( with clothes in the car ) and say , Okay it s time to go......... and buckle her up with her pjs. She may throw a fit.......... don't tell her that her clothes are in the car til you have a quick answer that she is going to be corop next time getting dressed and ready ???? Because if she is not, she can go to school with her pjs. :0)

IDK. I guess a reward system is per child if that would work. I think we all have to fight our battles. This is obviously one that you have to fight. Getting up earlier may be needed to get her waking up and modivated. She may need 30 min on the coach watching TV til she goes.

Hope any of this helps.

There could be a bully or something at school bothering her. I had the same problem with my daughter kids are very mean. Talk to her and find out why she doesn't want to go to school. You might be surprised what you find out. I also worked in the schools and I know what goes on!!

I am kind of going through the same thing you are, my son is almost 6yrs old, he likes to go to school, but he takes his time on doing stuff, and I just had my sons parent teacher conference yesterday, and she told me he will try to have people help him, but they make him try to do it himself, and said he will get frustrated and mad. So I do not think it is necessarily that she do not want to go to school, it may be that she used to having mommy and daddy help her do things, i try to help if it really needs to be done, but since the talk with his teacher, been having him do more stuff by himself, they also suggested doing rewards charts as people metioned on here already, good luck

I am not into punishing kids without knowing what's really going on. I value knowing my kid rather than having convenient instant obedience. The parent conference idea is a good one. there may be issues at school with bullying or something else. As an ex-teacher, I would also point out that "good girl" "bad girl" are vocab terms that are best dropped, as young kids do see themselves as much in control ( there are too many variables that create a "good girl"). It is better to describe the actions or choices or descisions as good or bad. Good luck...sorry to be so terse...gotta a little one to tend to!