5 Yo Son Resists SLEEPING!

What about a nice warm bath with epson salts? The magnesium is supposed to have calming qualities, and I find it works with my daughter (ADHD) some. I also have a magnesium cream that I rub on her back when she's really agitated.
B.

I need to hook you up with my other gf. Her son has Asperger's too, as well as his father. She actually used Melatonin drops and they worked like a charm! You can buy them at a health food store that carries it. Feel free to email me offlist and I can hook the 2 of you up. It helps when you can talk to others who deal exactly with what you deal with!
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S.

I can relate to where you are coming from. I teach children at a private residential school and have a student wiht Autism that has sleeping issues as well. What we have found with her is to of course keep the routine, but using a weighted vest or blanket helps to calm and ground her to get to a place where she can actually lay down to sleep. It doesn't work all the time, but it has helped. Have you had any sensory evaluations? you should be receiving some form of services from a school system. You can challange the evaluation, especially since AS is a medical dignosis only a doctor can state weather he has it or not. The school can determine educational needs, sensory is part of an occupational evaluation in some districts. you are welcome to contact me and we can discuss this further.

hi K., when my son was 3 he went thru the same, also with aspergers, and I got some natural melatonin.. opened up the pill and put half into a little applesauce that I gave him in bed... no more problems.. all natural. And in a few months, I didn't have to use it anymore. Good luck! L.

My son is also Aspie (9 years old) and sleep has always been a problem with him. What works best for us is sticking to a routine (and when he was younger that included a visual routine) for bedtime, and big pillows on his bed that he could put on him for some calming/sensory. When he was younger we also did the brushing.
Another thing - because Aspie's tend to think in black/white, we used the rules to our advantage. If he wasn't going to sleep, he still has to stay in bed, keep his voice quiet and no toys on the bed. At least his body is staying in a routine and he's not up stalling, etc. Although he goes to bed around 8:30, it's usually 10 before he goes to sleep, but now that I can count on him at least staying quiet and in bed it helps.

Hello K.,

Do you have a DAN (Defeat Autism Now) doctor?

My son is developmentally delayed and has a lot of sensory issues. Since I got fed up with "conventional" medicine, I did research and found a homeopathic doctor. She's been a great help.

Now, he is in a gluten-free, casein-free, and soy-free diet. Yes...it is hard to feed the child, but he is doing a lot better.

I'll be happy to provide you with more info.

Good luck,
M.

I have a best friend who's son has Asperger's and is borderline autistic. He hates going to bed also. But here are some little things that she has tried that actually have worked for her. As far as the sensory issue, she did some reading and got some advice on using flannel sheets. Something about the material stimulates a calming i guess. Her doctor also recommended this. As for the sleeping part, she to this day, used Melotonan , she gets it at GNC, your body makes this natuarlly when you start to get tired. He takes it a couple of minutes before bed and it helps his body calm down and he does get some sleep. Maybe these little things can help out.. good luck

Does he watch Tv or play video games, that can have a direct effect on how he is feeling and can cause what you are describing. Get him outside to play as much as possible, and in time it will clear up. Also try to limit the sugar intake, these days its in everything, even bread....Hope this helps.

When my son, then 8, was having trouble going to sleep, and staying asleep, his pediatrician suggested stopping all visual stimulation an hour prior to bedtime. We let him take a bath, read, play with his clay or drawing, but no television or video games. Dad would stop rough-housing and we've also tried soft music. Then, silence for at least 30 minutes before bedtime. He could lay in his bed until he fell off to sleep. He wouldn't wake in the middle of the night, and he'd eventually fall off. But, he'd tell us he wouldn't go to bed until midnight, sometimes, so we'd increase his daytime activities (more fitness and playtime), and then he'd have very little trouble going to sleep. Also, make sure your child's diet has little sugar and NO caffeine. If he's AS, I doubt you're giving him chocolate and soda, but check ingredients in other things like sauces and spices. He could be having some trouble with things like Red Dye, wheat, gluten, etc. We also try chamomille lotion or bubble bath for babies (supposed to calm children), multivitamins, reading and prayer. Strangely, he has little trouble sleeping when we travel. Not sure if it's because we're even busier, or if it's because he's so tired from being at home and not sleeping properly. Finally, I'd bring it up with your child's pediatrician if these home remedies do not work.

I would first ask your childs doctor about suggestions on how to get your son to sleep. I knew someone that had a child with Autism and she hung white christmas lights all around the living room and everything so when it was dark out that is what lite the house because they were soft light and calming. You can also try an oil burner with camomile, lavendar, or lilac oil. They are all relaxing and calming fragrances. Also try reading a couple of stories to your child in bed to help him go to sleep. You could also try having him draw what he is seeing as well. You may also try doing some research and see if you maybe able to find some advice on getting your child to sleep with the syndrome that he has. I wish you luck and hope that you find a solution.

Hi K.,

There is a resource person in Maryland that deals with this type of children. Please write to her and tell her your story.

Her name is Dr. Laura Dietzel and her e-mail address is

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Hope she will help you. Good luck. D.

My youngest really REALLY resists sleep too, always has. We haven't had her diagnosed yet, as she is not yet 3, but I am pretty sure she is "on the spectrum." We have only been trying this for a few days now, but a gluten free, casein free diet with no artificial colors, sweeteners, or high fructose corn syrup has been working wonders. She is calmer, happier, talking more, and went to sleep without a peep last night for the first time in almost 2 years. Oh and we also eliminated apples, because she eats them all day long and I have heard that they can over-excite certain children.

It takes a lot of planning and reading, as corn syrup is in EVERYTHING these days. And my little girl loves cheese and crackers and cookies and such, so we have had to find acceptable substitutes. My husband and I are overweight and have sugar cravings so we always bought a lot of foods with artificial sweeteners in an effort to restrict calories, but because our kids were also eating these products we are now switching over to natural, low calorie options like Stevia, Agave nectar, etc.

You may want to try just going off dairy and see if you see an improvement. If not, try removing the other things I mentioned one by one. If you don't see an improvement after a few weeks, then it's clearly not dietary, but in my family it was worth a try to improve her sleep and her behavior, which was out of control.

Good luck!!!

-V.
Mom to two girls in Louisa

I know that kids with Asperger's tend to be highly intelligent, so you are going to have to use that to your advantage. I would suggest taking him to one of those stores that sells sleep masks and letting him pick one out. Maybe something silky would feel good, and that way he doesn't have to keep his eyes shut but can block out things around him with a dark mask. Since he's 5, he can make some choices on him own, like picking out some soothing classical music to "calm his thoughts" when they are flying around. And this last one is a stretch, but if you can find one of those Dreamcatcher things (Native American), you can hang it in his room and tell him that it will catch all his thoughts while he sleeps so they are still there in the morning. Good luck!

You might try a weighted vest or blanket for him. They're weighted with beans sewn into little pockets and it's supposed to ground their senses. If even the smallest light is a problem, try a sleep mask or a blindfold. There is a mask made for contact wearers called a "mindfold" that allows the eyes to be open, but no light gets in.

If you can get a hold of a copy, read "The Out of Synch Child".

This links page has a lot of wonderful resources for dealing with sensory processing/integration disorder http://www.mothersfromhell2.org/links.htm Our son probably would've benefited from these too, but he does well with strict routine, but his diagnosis is autism and SPD. By the time I found these resources, he was already doing well.

Get him evaluated by the ECSE program at the local public school system. The special ed department at the school board should be able to help you get the process started. Having a diagnosis before you walk in the door makes it sooo much easier. We didn't have one and it was not fun to say the least. Even if you homeschool they have to provide speech, and OT if he qualifies. Remember, your child is entitled to a free and appropriate education.

The local community services board may be able to help too. When he turns 6 he may qualify for a Medicaid waiver for Autism. This will cover things like OT and other therapies as well as respite care. If your family qualified for WIC, you should qualify for regular Medicaid since they work on the same income guidelines. (I just found this out last week)

Look up the closest chapter of the ASA. I think the closest one to you in in Richmond, which is quite a haul. We have one close in Norfolk, but the meetings are at an odd time of the month and we always forgot. The times we did go it was very informative and it was good to know we weren't alone.

A decent mom to mom resource is the Mothering forums at www.mothering.com/discussions Check out the Special Needs Parenting forums. Be careful how you word things as they tend to the more radical side when it comes to autism and related disorders. Lurk a little before you post and you'll be ok.

Hope this helps.

Hi K.. I have a 4.5 yr old w/autism. I don't know if he watches any TV or is on the computer anytime before he goes to be. I've learned that no TV, computer or video games for at least an hour before bed makes a huge difference for us. PM baths help as well.

Edit: Seems someone gave the same advice.

K.,
I am a Pediatric Occupational Therapist and when I was back in Oregon I specifically worked with diagnosing children on the spectrum. The developmental pediatrician we worked with FREQUENTLY would recommend melatonin for children if the parents were using a sleep diet and still having problems. A proper sleep diet is to bed at the same time every night, wake up same time and no tv/video games within one hour of bedtime. If you are trying to do this and still having problems I would definately try melatonin. My son has many sensory issues and is a poor sleeper. He has been on Melatonin for more than a year now and it is a God send for us. We frequently are adjusting his dose to see if we can get him off, but 1 mg seems to be where he does best. We were up to 2 mg for a few months when he was having a very difficult time. I hope this helps. There are also multiple resources out there to address his sensory issues. Have you seen an occupational therapist that specifically addresses sensory concerns?? He would benefit from an evaluation and probably services if he is not already getting them. For the sleep a weighted blanket or deep pressure activities before bed are typically calming activities. I just saw your edit, so it is good he is getting SI. Another great book is Your Sensational Child by Lucy Miller. It takes the info in Out of Sync Child to the next level. Feel free to contact me if you have other questions.

Dear K.,
I suggest putting him in his bed same time every night, read him one book and rub his back..
B.
A little about me:
mother of 3 boys, grandma of one girl
worked in field of radiology all my life, but am slowing down now after brain aneursym rupture and started a home biz, check it out at www.BossFree-DebtFree.com

Hi K.!

Does this sound familiar?

Takes hours to fall asleep and when he finally does he wakes up and is AWAKE for hours? Some nights not falling asleep until 2 or even 6am! If by some miracle he does sleep, he wakes way too early like 5 or even 4:30? Some nights waking and coming into your room (or by a sibling's bed) only to stand and watch you sleep for an hour or more?

You have a consistent routine, are diligent about diet and no TV, offer plenty of outdoor time, etc., and still to no avail your child is a vampire??? You have other children so you know you are not CRAZY or "missing" something obvious?

My son had SEVERE sleep issues, too. We eventually had him treated through NAET for a number of things but when they treated him for gluten it was a huge breakthrough! (With NAET you only eliminate the substance for the 25 hours after treatment, then they can have it without effects if they are cleared). We went to (and still go to) www.richmondnaetclinic.com

I feel like this really treated the SOURCE of the problem, instead of just managing the symptoms . . .

Other things that really helped in the meantime:

We bought a celestial canopy that hangs from the ceiling to the floor and hung it over the head of his bed with the sides coming down the front and front sides of the bed. (found here: http://www.magiccabin.com/magiccabin/product.do?section_i...) Then put a "husband" pillow in there, another pillow to support his sleeping pillow, and another pillow by his feet and one on the other side so there is a little space in the middle of like 5 pillows all under the canopy. This creates a little "cocoon" for him. He calls it his boat. We did the celestial sky because he is obsessed with the sky. Always wanting to be in the sky when he is overwhelmed or upset.

When he nestles in his boat, between all the pillows (so pillows touch him on all sides), we cover him with a heavy blanket. All of this helps him to feel "grounded" when he closes his eyes.

Then we also give him melatonin. We give him 1 mg. That is conventionally considered a high dose, however, I have done extensive research and there was a study for children with SEVERE sleep issues who took 5 mg. We experimented with doses to see how much he needed for it to work. We have learned he needs to be IN bed within 20 minutes of taking it or else he becomes unbearably cranky. It has a very different effect in children than adults and if a child takes it for an extended period of time they can come off it with healthy sleep patterns in place (so as not to have sleep issues follow them for their whole lives). An extended period of time could be a year or two.

In contrast a child who is just a little restless can take melatonin (.5mg) for a week and be back on track.

Our little one has been sleeping like a champ!!!!! He still wakes up occasionally, may come in our room or not, may fall back asleep on his own or not, but when he cannot fall back asleep on his own, we give him another dose of melatonin and he is back asleep.

It took about a week for him to get settled into this, but we noticed a change in the first few nights!

Good luck! I feel your pain!!!!!

J.

I know someone who made homemade play doh with lavendar oil. She let here child play with it before bed (after getting ready of course.

I just recently went to a monthly meeting in Leesburg with the Weston Price Foundation. They were talking about a book called GAPS, Gut and Psychology Syndrome. I would recommend it to any parent that is dealing with children with various attention/brain function opportunities.

S.
SAHM of 2

WILL HE FALL ASLEEP WITH THE TV ON OR LIGHTS ON maybe if he is relaxed enough laying in bed watching tv with the lights on his eyes will drift closed and he woont even know it. or maybe he can close his eyes to music and tell him to think of something like a story or somthing mabe if he is thinking of something his pictures in his head wont be running wild they will be focused.

Hi. My son doesn't have Asperger's, but he does have a problem 'shutting off his brain' as he says. He constantly tells me that he just can't go to sleep cuz of all the stuff going on. So I have him lay down and close his eyes, and I have him tell me what he sees. When I hear something interesting like, 'I see a bunch of cars', I have him focus on that. I ask him to count them ,describe them, etc. usually he will calm down enough to fall asleep.
Just a thought.
M.

You've had some excellent responses, K.! I have a 16 yo son with Kabuki syndrome (you can look it up online to see what it is); luckily he never has had sleep problems, thank God!

I didn't read all the responses, so maybe you got this one, but I'm offering this advice anyway: Talk to your pediatrician and see if he/she will refer your son to a sleep study lab. They have one right at Carroll Hospital Center.

Good luck! BTW, does he eventually pass out? Does he take naps at all?

I know if I don't get enough sleep, I cannot even begin to function; I feel for you caring for 3 kids and little to no sleep :(

Have a blessed Easter,
Pam
Westminster, MD

Hi: I have a good friend with an autistic child who has faced every issue in the book, including sleep. She and her former business partner, Dr. Robin Allen, have written several publications and made a video called, "Using Visual and Behavioral Cues in the Home" to teach kids with differences basic life/community skills. You can reach her at www.robinallen.com.

Also, Ivymount School in Rockville has a FABULOUS program for kids with learning differences, including a terrific Asperger's program. They are at http://www.ivymount.org/index.html. It is a remarkable place (I do consulting work for them). There are some great resources and great support out there. Good luck!