Hi Ladies - I have a nearly six month old daughter and a four year old son. We've survived the initial sibling-adjustment period after our daughter's birth and everyone is basically healthy and happy, but seems like we could be doing better in terms of sleep.
The baby, who is breast-fed, sleeps reasonably well at night, from about 11 p.m. to 7 a.m., which is great as she wakes up happy and smiling, and so do I! But her daytime naps are a mess and bedtime is this long exhausting process. She loves to nurse to sleep for her naps - and it is the easiest way for me to sooth her to sleep, but then seems to wake up crying, often with painful gas after 20-40 minutes, which just doesn't seem like enough sleep. If I burp her between nursing and putting her down, she's awake again, and I have to figure out how to get her to sleep - sometimes walking with a gentle bounce works, sometimes nothing works! She sleeps well in the car or stroller, but I hear that this sleep-in-motion is not good quality sleep and I need to figure out how to get her to sleep well in her crib or our bed. She seems to want three naps during the day but just won't stay asleep long enough for it to help and just seems to get over-tired.
She seems drowsy in the early evening and I do the whole bath/ dim the lights/ slowdown for bedtime / nurse / burp, and she's ready for bed by 9. But then she's waking up with BURPS! More soothing/burping, and she's down again at 10, then awake with more burps at 11! Then more burping, soothing and usually the last nursing, and maybe she's down for the night by 11 or 11:30. By this time I am totally exhausted and have not had the chance to even talk with my husband, much less act have any sort of romantic life with him. If I put her down awake she just screams.
So I guess I'm hoping you smart moms can tell me if this seems normal for her age, or if there is something I can adjust to make this easier on all of us. I often don't have tons of time to sooth her during the day for naps because I have my 4 year old to look after. And at night, we don't want to just let her scream because it could wake him up. HELP!!! Thank you in advance for your time and suggestions.
Get the "Babywise" book. Seriously. Five kids, used it with all. I do co-sleep, which the authors don't like, but the scheduling and feeding info is great.
Best wishes and blessings
My first thought is that she's not getting enough sleep at night which can really mess up day time naps. My son goes to bed at 7pm and gets up around 6am. We wake him up to feed him at 11 or so just before we go to bed and he usually wakes up around 3am for a diaper change. Other than that he gets 11 solid hours each night which is what is recommended at 6 months. I haven't dealt with the gas/burping issues you mentioned, you might want to ask your pediatrician. Having a consistent bedtime routine was all he needed at night.
As for naps...I'm in the same situation as you! My little boy will only sleep for 30 mins then wakes up (if he goes down at all). We believe its because he can't transition into the deeper level of sleep that usually happens after about 30 minutes. I've tried everything. He used to nap in his swing which worked like magic but he's too active and I don't think its safe anymore. I had to resort to the CIO method this afternoon. He's sleeping soundly but I don't know for how long...its only been 15 minutes. Thanks for posting I look forward to seeing more answers - and good luck!
I agree with the gas drops. Because if she is having gas pains it would be hard for her to fall asleep. Also around 6 months we started to let my son cry is out. He would only cry for 15-20 minutes and then he was asleep. It taught him to not only sleep longer, but to have the ability to fall back asleep on his own if he woke up. We had a routine for naps and bed time that included books and singing/cuddling, but we always put him down awake, but drowsy so he could fall asleep on his own. Now at 18 months I put him in his crib wide awake (still after books and prayers and songs) and he plays and talks in his crib and then falls asleep on his own.
If you're nervous about the CIO methood try to be positive and let your little girl suprise you, she may do a whole lot better than you think. Also, I felt like it was my job as his Mom to help him learn how to fall asleep, vs. putting him to sleep. Occassionally he cries a little when we put him down, but rarely. He loves his crib, and will play for 30-45 minutes in the morning when he wakes up which also allows us more sleep It's great!
Use infant gas drops. Mylicon drops.
Burping, for some, does not get all the gas out.
My daughter as a baby had bad gas problems... she RARELY farted or burped. Though I tried.
the infant gas drops is the only thing that helped, and helped the gas pains.
And helped her sleep better.
And she may also be teething. Many times, more than one thing can tweak them. It is also a growth-spurt time... and their intake needs increases and feeding frequency. And it is a typical age in which they get "separation anxiety" .
Also... for your 4 year old (my kids are 4 years apart)... you NEED to have a daily consistent routine with him. Just explain to him, he's old enough. Have a daily 'pattern' and that at your baby's nap times, it is quiet time with you and you both do something else. Or he nap too... in the afternoon. For me when my son was a baby and even now, I timed his and my daughter's nap, to be at the SAME time. My older daughter understood... and it worked out.
And, at night, when her baby brother would scream/cry at night... she got used to it... but ONLY after I explained to her... about baby development. Put in age appropriate ways. That a "baby" WILL wake/cry/get hungry/have a hard time sleeping sometimes/that i have to breastfeed etc. BUT that it is MOMMY's "job" to take care of baby and she does not have to "worry." Its okay. Her baby brother is fine. After that, it was fine for her.... and each month as he developed, I would explain to her about what he can/cannot do and how he is 'changing' or going through "phases." It helped my older daughter.
anyway, I would really use the gas drops.
It helps a ton.
all the best,
Susan
