6 Month Old Night Time Feedings and Sleeping All Night

Updated on July 15, 2008
J.S. asks from Sacramento, CA
37 answers

My 6 month old wakes up between 3 and 5 each night. He has just began solids, so his intake is very little. I've managed to eliminate a night time feeding around 1:00 am, but have been feeding him if he wakes up past 4:00. If he wakes up before 4:00 I pat him and he often spends up to an hour crying off and on. I know it sounds strange, but I do feed him if he wakes up past 4:00. I feel he is hungry, but am worried I am confusing him by feeding him sometimes and sometimes not. I feel horrible about him crying and this has gone on for about a month. He falls asleep by himself during the day and at bedtime. He sucks his fingers and I know he can soothe himself. Should I eliminate all feedings during the night or wait until he is eating more solids?

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So What Happened?

Thanks to everyone for their informative responses. I decided to see if my son would settle on his own after waking up. Most of the time he does. After a few weeks of doing this he still consistently wakes around 5:30 so I have chose to feed him.

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A.Z.

answers from San Francisco on

I think that a baby as young as 6 months might actually be hungry (as you said). Especially if he continues to wake after a month of not getting fed, it sounds like more than a habit. Dr. Sears thinks that babies may physiologically need to eat up to twice a night until at least a year. Good luck, I know it is tiring: my 10 month old still wakes up at least twice per night (not just to eat).

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C.F.

answers from San Francisco on

If he's only six months old, he probably still needs to eat at night. That's not very big. Especially if he's not eating a lot of solid foods yet to keep his tummy full till morning. Good luck! You had 3 in a row fast like my sister did, I know you must be very tired. It gets easier as they get older.

Take care, C.

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D.F.

answers from Yuba City on

Personally I don't think you should cut him off his night time feedings. Kids are not going to starve themselves. I say if he wakes up feed him so he will be comfortable. I know a mom who has a child and she is just now sleeping through the night and she is nine months. All kids are different so think you should keep feeding him, you'll both feel better after he has his feeding time.

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J.O.

answers from San Francisco on

Just reading the other replies is stressful for me. I have a baby who will be 6 months this week (and a two year old). I really need more sleep, but I think it is too early to expect my baby to sleep through the night without eating. I know some babies do, and that's great, but I'm not going to go through all the stress and lost sleep of sleep training to get rid of all night feedings now.

I do want to get my baby down to one feeding during the night. He does that some nights, nursing around 3 a.m. and then around 5:30.

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R.S.

answers from Redding on

That sounds really hard. I can't imagine letting my baby screem for food when he is hungry. It must be really tramatic for both of you. My vote is to feed him when he wants to be fed. He will naturally shift into sleeping longer and longer sessions in the night as he grows. He is only 6mts old and he still needs to know that you are there to take care of him.

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T.R.

answers from San Francisco on

i think you need to listen to your child's cues. he is telling you he needs you and by letting him cry you are telling him to not trust you and that you will not take care of his needs. his only way to communicate that something isn't right is to cry and to ignore that you are telling him that he is not to trust you and not loved enough. i know this may seem mean to say, but it's the truth. you also do need to be consistent. i would suggest letting your child tell you what he needs and really listening to that, even if it means not getting a great night's rest for a while for you. expecting a child to self-sooth is sort of silly at this age...they should be dependent on you until they are ready to become independent because if they cannot be dependent now then they will forever be finding unhealthy ways to self-sooth what they lost from you.

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E.E.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi J.,

Nutritionally he has no need for nighttime feedings. You are right on that he may be getting confused. He doesn't know what time it is, whether it is before or after 4. If it is before 4 and he cries off and on for an hour, do you then feed him if he is still crying and 4 o'clock rolls around? That would be even more confusing for him and it would encourage him to stay awake and keep crying until you come in. I know it's hard to hear your precious baby cry especially if you think he is hungry.

When he wakes up in the middle of the night try not to think about how long it has been since he has eaten. Instead, think about how he is probably just going through a light stage of sleep and is in the habit of waking up at that time. When you wake up in the night to use the bathroom do you run to the kitchen thinking "Yikes! I haven't eaten for over 6 hours!" You probably don't even feel hungry because your metabolism slows down when you are sleeping and so does your baby's. Don't go in there right away. Let him work it out on his own. Fussing on and off for an hour is not going to hurt him in any way. He is probably more asleep than awake which is why he can't get a full cry going. If he wakes up and starts screaming like he's in pain then go right in there and make sure everything is alright. But, if he's just being fussy then let him be. It may take a few nights but if you are consistent there will be improvement. It will take him less and less time to settle back to sleep and eventually he wont wake up at all.

Best Wishes,

E.

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J.B.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi Jody,
I am a bit confused - are you asking about weaning your child? He's awfully young for that. Perhaps you mean you feed him solid food at 4 am...if so, it might be better to wait until a bit later in the morning...during the night (sleeping time) he needs his stomach to be not-so-full in order to avoid digestive stress. It is important to establish mealtime rhythms as much as possible, but again he is still quite young. With nursing it is quite a different story since the child receives more than just the milk, which is easily digested -he also receives your warmth and heartbeat - very reassuring!
Best thoughts.
J. Birns
Waldorf Educator/consultant/mother of 2

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E.P.

answers from San Francisco on

My 6 month old also takes a feed around that time of the morning, although it has stretched out so its more like 5am, usually. If he wakes up around 4 I feed him anyway as I assume since he's awake and will be having a feed soon, he is probably already hungry and will not settle without it. I'm not sure what to suggest. I read that solids don't make a different, its more a biological awakening. Maybe just make sure he is getting enough food during the day. Sorry I can't be more helpful but I thought you might like to hear that another baby the same age does the same thing!

E.

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L.O.

answers from Sacramento on

Do what you feel is right... my baby is 6 months old and still wakes in the night for a feeding. My son's doctor said it is still okay at this age to feed him but also did say that if he doesn't wake up on his own, let him sleep because he doesn't NEED the night feeding. If your son is crying for longer than 20min. straight then I would feed him. If you have any doubts talk to your son's doctor, that's what they are there for... good luck!

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J.S.

answers from Sacramento on

You have some good advice here and some not so good. I'll give you mine as a professional in this field:

As a Lactation Consultant, child development specialist and parent of 3 (boys, 22, 13 and 11) I can tell you one thing for sure: Every baby is different. I will also say that if the baby is hungry you should feed him. Period. To make him wait in hunger while you pat his back and he cries...that leaves him confused as to why you are letting him cry and be hungry and you feeling like hell for letting him cry and be hungry. You can NEVER go wrong by meeting a baby's needs. He clearly has a NEED to be fed - feed him. You will both feel better.

Fact: Babies are designed to eat frequently during each 24 hour time period. Research has shown that, while some kids do OK on the scheduled 4 hourly feeds and 10-12 hour sleep at night, they are the less common babies. These children have generally been conditioned to do so. Their bodies are not designed to do this naturally and there is evidence to show this rigid feeding schedule can cause other health issues later in life. There are many reasons parents end up with this type of schedule: Some on purpose because it suits their needs (not the baby's) and some because their Dr (who didn't know any better) told them to.

Fact: It is NORMAL for a baby to wake every 2-3 hours to feed. It is also normal for babies to wake only once a night to feed. Key here is to FEED the BABY when they wake. Most babies will only wake up if they are hungry. I ask my parents how they would feel if they were really hungry (to the point their stomach hurts) but someone spent an hour or more patting them on the back and saying "sorry - you need to soothe yourself, you can't possibly be hungry but if you are it just isn't time to eat - even tho I have your food right here in my hand you have to wait another hour."

Fact: You will NOT confuse your child by feeding him when he is hungry. Rather, you will show him that he can trust you to meet his needs when he has them. Do NOT work to cut out night feeds at 6 months of age. He needs those feeds to get his necessary daily intake of food. He is not on enough solids as of right now to make up for the missed nighttime feedings. And it would not be healthy for him to suddenly increase the amount of solids in order to get rid of night feeds.

You can never go wrong by meeting his needs. Make your life and his easier by simply feeding him when he is hungry. You'll sleep better, he'll sleep better, you and he will both be a lot happier. He will grow to trust that you will always be there when he needs you - this is a really good thing! If someone told you he shouldn't be eating at night anymore then that someone doesn't truly know what babies are all about and how they truly grow and develop. Some need to eat at night so they wake up and ask to be fed. Those who don't need to eat at night don't. Watch the baby - if he needs you - be there. You won't regret it... He will drop the night feeds when he is ready and able to... I know this from personal and professional experience...

Good luck!

J. Simpson, IBCLC, CIIM, MOM

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G.A.

answers from San Francisco on

I would still feed him. I think 6 months is still too young to go all night without food. If you only ate a little bit before bed time, you might wake up hungry too. I don't know if you're breastfeeding or bottle feeding but some milk/formula at that time will probably make him very happy. I breastfed my daughter up until 15m of age and at least 2-3 times in the night up to a point. Yes, I was exhausted but eventually as she ate more solids, like fruit and vegetables and crackers, etc.. she slept longer through the night and the breastfeeding at those times stopped. I heard from all sorts what to do and not to do but its my child and I will respond the way I want to to my baby. People said you're setting up bad habits but I said "oh well, I'll break em later" and she's fine. Do what makes you and you're baby happy and it will all work out fine down the road. Good luck and enjoy your little one!
G. A

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V.M.

answers from San Francisco on

My older daughter slept through the night at 4 1/2 months, AFTER we let her cry it out one night. It lasted 30 minutes, she went back to sleep, and has been good since.

We put her on this feeding schedule:
early morning - 1 8-oz bottle
mid-morning - 1 4-oz bottle, 2-3 tbsp rice cereal with water, fed from a bowl
mid-afternoon - same as mid-morning
night - same as early morning

She ate 4 times daily, and we saw that she was getting up in the middle of the night due to habit, and not due to hunger. This is probably what's happening with your son, that getting up to eat is a habit.

It's tough, but your son is not going to starve by eliminating the night time feeding. He'll increase his amount of food intake soon enough. Sometimes it takes a little while for some kids to get used to solid foods. I had to be tough with my kids like that, and realize that they will be okay. I also realized that I don't normally get up at 4am to eat a sandwich. :)

Hope this helps!

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L.N.

answers from San Francisco on

I would go with your gut and feed him. Crying for more than an hour seems really grim to me, and if you're feeling it's not right, it's probably not. It doesn't make sense to me to stop night feedings this early. It seems perfectly reasonable to me that they'd be hungry at night and need to be fed. He needs to know that you're there for him. Good luck!

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J.S.

answers from San Francisco on

I'm not sure why 4 AM seems to be a cutoff point for you? At that age, I would just feed them whenever they give feeding cues--as I would an adult or anyone who said they were hungry. I know my daughter needed nighttime feedings for at least the first year. She was breastfed, I don't know if you're doing that or if it makes a difference. Nighttime parenting is not fun but unfortunately it is part of parenting...surely nights would be more restful for all without an hour of crying and feeding the babe instead?

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T.G.

answers from San Francisco on

My 7th month old does the same thing... Nurses 3 to 4 times a night. He sleeps next to me so I nurse him on my side and he just falls back asleep. During the day he naps without nursing and can fall asleep pretty easily. Overall, he has a great disposition, hardly ever cries, and I feel that is partly because he feels secure and comforted throughout the day and night. I have decided to allow him to continue to nurse during the night until he doesnt need it any more (hopefully soon....) Probably as he eats more and more solids.

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S.F.

answers from San Francisco on

You may want to try a dream feed. Essentially right before you go to bed yourself you get baby up and feed the baby (either nurse or bottle). Each night or 2 nights you go in 10 minutes earlier and feed. Then after a couple of these nights go back another 10 minutes and so on and so forth until you are at babe's bedtime.

Important thing to note is to keep the room dark and quiet, avoid any talking/singing and don't do a lot of motion (ie don't rock). Only wake baby enough to get the nipple in. Don't change the diaper uless it's soaked thru or poopy of course.

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C.K.

answers from Stockton on

My daughter woke up three to four times every night until I weaned her at 14.5 months. I was like a zombie. Now she does not wake up because she knows she's not getting any. It took me three days to wean her and by that third day she slept through the night. If you can manage on little to no sleep I would just say keep doing it. It's comforting. I work full time, so I felt that night time nursing’s were time for my baby and I to spend together. Maybe the little one wants you time at night since he shares your time during the day with siblings??

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N.C.

answers from Sacramento on

If he normally puts himself back to sleep and has had trouble going back to sleep for a month I would feed him. Technically when you are told a baby should be able to sleep through the night it is only 5 hours, not the 8-12 we think of. I believe that it is very resonable to feed him. Do what you feel comfortable with. It isn't worth him crying on and off for an hour. If he wasn't hungry I think that he wouldn't be waking so consistantly since you don't feed him until after 4. Read the No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley. You can get it for a few dollars on ebay or Amazon. Remember that it's not what the world around you is ok with it is what you are ok with.

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S.C.

answers from Sacramento on

Hi J.,

I would suggest speaking with your son's Dr if you have a concern. Sounds like you are a great mom for even being concerened and trying to figure out what's best for your son. There is sooooo much information out there and every book/fiend/Dr contradicts the next.

I read some of the responses you got back - all I can say is you need to disregard all of the posts that pass judgement - you are asking for advice not anyone's oppinion on your parenting style. In response to the negative posters - I don't care how many books you read, how many kids you have, how long you went to school or what your profession is. The bottom line is every kid is different.

You are the expert on your own child and you sound like you are trying to do what is best for your child.

I don't have any advice for you on this subject because this was not one of the problems I have faced.

Good luck!!!

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J.K.

answers from Redding on

it always felt most intuitive to me to feed my little one as he asked for it until i really knew he was nursing for comfort more than food -- like when he was sitting down and eating a good dinner with us (around 14 mos) i have to say, trying to eliminate some feedings but not all night time feedings could prolong the whole process because it doesnt make as much sense to a liitle one (we used daylight as a cue for when nursing was allowed) also, at the older age i felt so good knowing my kid could understand my simple phrases to explain what was happening. i dont think you will damage your kid by trying to do this feeding schedule, but in my experience it could be a lot of work, whereas if you just nurse him for a few more months and dont stress you will be so much more relaxed about it. it seems like when i struggled against my son with sleep stuff for a few weeks, i would be sad and drained, and end up realizing that he just wasnt ready. then, soon enough he would be there on his own. you must be lucky if your 2 older kids didnt wake up frequently at this age, but i am sure you are tired with them so close in age. good luck and know that this is just one of the many ways you get to show him you are nurturing, so if you just have to cut him off, you can provide closeness so many ways!

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L.M.

answers from San Francisco on

Even Weissbluth (wrote Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child and a CIO advocate) believes that babies may need to night feed even up to 9 months. Please feed you baby at night when he is hungry. A hungry baby is in pain and needs to be fed. It sounds like he is a great sleeper - falling asleep on his own, self-soothing. That is wonderful. Be grateful that your baby is doing so well. 1-2 feedings a night at 6 months for a boy is really not bad at all.

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C.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi J.,
I thought the book The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems was fabulous for dealing with this kind of situation. The book goes into more detail but essentially you would have your son on an eating (every 4 hours?) and sleeping schedule during the day and then do a dream feed at night (like another person suggested). The nanny who wrote the book recommends keeping the dream feed until 7-8 months or until solids are well established. There is also a lot of info in the book to determine if your son is waking out of habit, hunger or some other reason. Both of my kids were sleeping through the night at 3 months using this book, so I'm always recommending it!
Good luck,
C.

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H.A.

answers from San Francisco on

I agree with what a lot of other mothers have written, do what works for you and your child, not what someone says he SHOULD be doing. Our daughter slept through the night early on, but has gone through many phases of waking at night. I attribute the "digressions" to teething, traveling, not getting good naps during the day, or a change in daytime schedule, etc. We often have no idea why she's waking at night but we go to her anyway and feed her if she seems to want to eat.

Good luck!

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A.F.

answers from San Francisco on

My DD is now 1.5 years, but I remember this time well. Our pediatritian said sleep "training" should occur between 4.6 months of age AND once they have doubled their birth weight. As long as his weight is fine, I would let him cry it out. We read "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child". I would suggest doing it on a long weekend, but since he is already 6mos, I wouldnt wait too long. It makes for a hard couple of days, but the parents I know who didnt go through the cry it out method are still dealing with their little ones waking up at nights. If you have a pretty easy baby, it should only be 3 nights where you let them cry. Our daughter cried for about 20 min & then put herself to sleep. Now she sleeps like an angel through the entire night.
Be strong.
Best of luck,
A.

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A.H.

answers from San Francisco on

Dear J.,
I sympathize. I remember when my 19-month old daughter was 6 months and all the changes happening in that first year made my sleep-deprived head spin.
My daughter also dropped that 1 am feeding early on (around 6 months) and I continued to feed her at 4-5 a.m. until she was 10 1/2 months old, at which time it was clear she was no longer hungry but waking out of habit. She slept through the night after that point. Before this point, however, it was clear to me that she was hungry. She at a full meal and wanted to nurse on both sides. I also waited until 6 months to start solids.
Other wakings around 6 months were due to developmental changes i.e. learning to crawl, learning to stand, etc.. She was just excited about these changes and wanted to practice.
We used a co-sleeper by the side of our bed and if she woke in the night before eating time, I would lean over and hug her for a long time then lay her down again telling her over and over it's time to sleep, it's sleepy time, etc... Sometimes it was agonizing, going on for an hour or more, but she eventually figured it out and I felt good knowing she wasn't crying it out.
Good luck!!! Try to keep yourself rested if that's possible.
A book that helped me a lot was "The No-Cry Sleep Solution" and Dr. Sear's "Sleep Book." I just took what information I needed from each book rather than follow their prescriptions strictly.
~A.

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A.K.

answers from San Francisco on

I did the same thing with my daughter and now (9 mo) she has a very regular schedule where she wakes at 5:15 nurses for 15 min and goes back down for a 1 hour nap. I think it took her body about 2 weeks to develop that sleep pattern

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A.C.

answers from San Francisco on

At 6 months, he should be fine sleeping through the night - 10 to 12 hours without feeling hungry. But if you've been feeding him during those early morning hours, he will be hungry b/c his body is used to getting food at that time. For my kids, I had them on a 4 hour schedule with 3 meals (solids) and a last bottle before bedtime (1-1.5 hours before sleeping).

Sample schedule if he's on solids:

8am - rice cereal with pureed fruit and bottle
10am - naptime
12pm - rice cereal with pureed vegetables and bottle
2pm - naptime
4pm - rice cereal with pureed vegetables and pureed fruit and bottle
extended wake time - no nap
7pm - last bottle
8-9pm - down for the night

He may be teething if he just started waking up in the middle of the night if he wasn't doing that before. Check his gums and if he is teething, I would give him motrin (lasts up to 8 hrs.) before bedtime to see if that would help. Best not to feed him if possible. That way his body won't expect food after the teething is over. And if he's had too much sleep during the day, that might make him wake up early in the morning as well.

Hope this helps! Good luck!!

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S.R.

answers from Sacramento on

You have to do what feels right to you. I eliminated feedings for my son at 4 1/2 months ( we didn't start solids until 6 months) so your son certainly can do with out them but only if you feel comfortable about it.

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J.S.

answers from San Francisco on

You've already expressed that it must be confusing to him. I agree. If you are going to feed him after 4 only I think you and he will both suffer. I say feed him when he awakens, help him get back to sleep, and go back to sleep yourself.

Good luck.

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J.W.

answers from Stockton on

did your doctor tell you to stop feeding your son at night? I know when my son woke up if he didnt go right back to sleep he was hungry. When he started solids he would have days he ate a lot and others he would hardley eat. Me personally think it sounds super cruel to not feed your child when he wakes up. he falls asleep about what time 7 or 8pm at night? When I read what you typed it comes across like you have your son on a diet and he can only eat after he has slept 8 hours plus but if it is 7 hours no food. just my opinion but my doctor never said to feed my son less when he went to solids it just meant less bottles in the day time when he was eating his fruits and veggies.

good luck with everything and again just my opinion but when i read your posting sounds like you are starving your child

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L.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Are you breast feeding or formula feeding? Remember, breast milk is easily digested so perhaps he is very hungry at the times he wakes. If you are breast feeding make sure he gets to the rich "hind" milk in his last feeding before bedtime.

I would always feed a hungry baby... he may be going though a growth spurt that requires more food. Again, I would always feed a hungry baby, he won't be doing this forever.

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A.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi J.-!

I think every child is different - all of my four kids when they were babies had very high metabolisms, were small and on the thin side - they needed to eat at night until they were at least 9 or 10 months old. Other babies might be able to eliminate a night feeding a lot sooner.
Only you know what is right for your baby - ignore the averages, the 'shoulds' and the 'normals' - they have very little to do with the individual - and usually just stress parents out and make them second guess themselves. If you are uncomfortable letting your baby cry at night because you think he is hungry, feed him :) It is better for the baby and better for you -

Some things that helped me was to make sure the baby nursed both sides (or taken a certain amount from a bottle) before they went to bed for the night - often they would fall asleep before they finished eating, and I would have to wake them up to make sure they finished - this would lengthen the time they would sleep.
Also a special blanket or toy was useful - I made it available only at bedtime to sleep with and it was associated with sleep - this made it easier for the kids to comfort themselves when they woke up -

Good luck with this-! You sound busy with three small kids - it is hard to not get enough sleep and deal with those demands during the day-!

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J.C.

answers from Sacramento on

Mine did the same for about 2 years. I breast fed and felt she was hungry around 4 or 5 after not eating all night. I did not have the heart to let her cry when I knew she was hungry. I say do what YOUR child needs and what feels RIGHT to you and forget about what age a child SHOULD sleep all night without eating. I believe every child is different and has different needs. Also, every mom is unique and I was not one who could ignore my child's needs or let her cry for hours. I say feed the poor hungry little thing. Good luck.... Jane

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C.L.

answers from Fresno on

A 6 month old should (unless underweight) be able to sleep all night (10-12 hours)without feeding at all. Feeding him just makes him more likey to wake up in the future. I think him waking up may just be a habit you have to break. The only real way to do it is let him cry it out (checking on him ever so ofter)My daughter didn't eat in the middle of the night starting at 3-4 months. Him waking in the night doesn't mean he is hungry. He could be hot, cold, teething or just wants a little attention. I think going in and patting him is a good idea when needed, but let him fuss in his crib for 10-15 minutes when he wakes up and see if he can put himself back to sleep. My daughter will cry out in the night sometimes and within 2 minutes she is back to sleep and we never even got out of our bed. Has your son always had the same sleep pattern? What time does he go to bed? How long are his naps? He is 6 months old, so you can definitely start giving him more solids and that should help. Once he starts crawling he will be more tired and hopefully sleep longer or enroll him in swim lessons (that really tires my daughter out).

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A.K.

answers from San Francisco on

I had almost the exact same situation with my daughter. At 6 months she had stopped the "night" nursing, but was still waking in the early morning. At her 6 mo appointment I talked to her Dr. about it and he told me she no longer needed to eat, and as long as I was feeding her at all during the hours she was sleeping she would continue to wake for it. He suggested giving some cereal after her last nursing and then stop all nugth feedings. We went cold turkey. The first night she cried for about an hour and went back to sleep. The next night she cried for about 20 min. By night 3 she was going from about 8:00pm to 9:00am with no feeding. So I would just stop going in the room. After several days he will adjust and learn that he needs to go back to sleep, because no one is coming in.
Good luck.

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K.J.

answers from San Francisco on

I do a lot of post partum work with families, often with older babies still not sleeping through the night. It is not uncommon for a 6 month old to still need to eat at least once at night. You know your baby best, if he's really hungry, let him eat! Hang in there, it's not forever, he will sleep.

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