6 Year Old Daughter as a Flower Girl at a Wedding

Maybe watch a wedding story on TLC and tape a few..(and the ones that show flower girls you can sit down with her and explain her job and how inportant it is to the bride...I think IF you have her help pick out a salon where she can go and get her hair done and what does she want to wear in her hear that will help...hmmmm...(Three is a hard age..but a fun one) I think I would get the little sis a T shirt that says "I'm with the flower girl" or something like that so she feels like she has a task just as important tooo

My four year old was a flower girl recently. She sounds just like your daughter. She hates having her hair fixed, in fact if I put it in a pony tail she takes it out, a barette, any thing it is out as fast as I get it in. What I did was told my daughter about the wedding and the dress months in advance then didn't bring it up again until I got the flower girl dress. When I got the dress she was EXTREMELY excited. She got to try it on, and then I put it away until the week before the wedding. I brought it out and she tried it on. Then we got online and we looked at other girls wearing dresses and their hair. After all of that she couldn't wait to wear it and get her hair fixed. The isle was the only thing I didn't mention until the day. She was so excited to know that her dress was just as pretty as her Aunts and she was going to walk down the isle in front of her because she wanted everyone to see her first. Thats my story, I was nervous she wasn't. I was completely surprised because she is a very shy and quiet girl. Good Luck!

We "bribed" our sons when they were ring bearers with some treats and Pokemon cards. We had things waiting for them in their seats so they weren't too fidgety during the wedding. Is there something special that could be a little gift for her role in the wedding? I know it's up to the bride and groom, but my brother and his wife had both of our boys in their wedding--they were just 7 and almost 4 at the time. They had one flower girl and two ring bearers ("pillow boys") and that way no one felt left out. My son who was almost 7 was the oldest of the three so he was kind of the leader of the group. The flower girl walked down the aisle first and both boys walked together behind her and they each had their own little pillow. Having kids in a wedding is very unpredictable, but they can be so adorable that they almost steal the show! If she can't be a 2nd flower girl is there some other special job for your younger daughter so she doesn't feel left out? Have fun at the wedding!

My daughter has been a flowergirl three times - One when she was three, next when she was four and one when she was five. The hardest one was when she was three because she didn't know the groom and he is a very large person. She did great going down the isle but I guess I forgot to tell her the rest of the directions to stand there with the bridesmaids because after she got to the end of the isle she turned around and picked up all the petals she had just dropped! I guess my suggestion is to make sure that she knows the groom or at least meets him before the wedding (if that's not her cousin). I would watch a wedding on TV and just make sure that they take the time at the rehearsal to instruct her well - tell her this is her getting to be a princess for the day. On the sister issue - I would get her a frilly dress too so she doesn't feel left out. Maybe you could be in charge of the flowergirl and dad could be in charge of the three year old so that she doesn't feel left out...Don't know if this helped or not...have fun at the wedding!

My daughter is 4 and will be in her 3rd wedding this summer. Does she know the little boy she will be walking down with? Sometimes that helps. We have also had something special for her (a stuffed animal, doll, etc) in the front pew to motivate her to come down the aisle. If possible have her involved as much as possible - maybe getting her hair done with the girls. That day she may surprise you when she sees everyone else getting ready in their pretty dresses and she may want to be like the older girls. Good luck and hope all goes well!!

I like to go to the library when there is something big coming up in my children's lives. They have a bunch of books about being a flower girl. My daughter is going to be a flower girl also, but is the complete opposite. She loves the dresses and all things girly. She was given a book by Kevin Henkes called Lilly's Big Day. It is really cute and humerous!

J.,
Is there some way she can take some ownership in the planning and practicing of her doing her part? Role playing and responsibility go a long way. Does she maybe want to learn how the tradition came along for a flower girl, or what she represents, etc?
You can always assign your younger to take pics or something of her sister before the ceremony, or after, etc. She could be the flower girl's attendant and perhaps carry a special purse with last minute things the flower girl might need.
Hope those ideas spark something.

Let her have as much say in things as possible
When my daughter was in my brother's wedding his wife let her pick the dress (and color)and the accessories. She also took her out the morning of the wedding for an up do. My daughters hair is normally extremely straight and thin so they did lots of curls held in place with clips shaped like butterflies and glitter in her hair. She normally hated having her hair done but she liked this. It took me 1/2 hour to get all the clips out and probably 3 days for the glitter to come out (not to mention the hairspray which she'd never got to wear before.) but it was well worth it because she let them dress her all up and she's not a girly girl.
She was also allowed to invite a friend to the wedding so she had someone to hang out with after the ceremony.

Are they having a rehearsal? Make sure she goes to that so she can see the venue and practice walking down the aisle. Have her meet the rest of the bridal party.

It's not the worst idea to have an adult or older child escort her down, or at least walk behind her. Maybe she can walk right in front of the maid of honor and best man, or an usher can escort her, for instance. Bring a pants outfit with, so she can change right after the ceremony.

Lastly, if she doesn't want to do it, I wouldn't force her. Her cousin can always ask someone else if she really wants a flower girl. It's not worth the anxiety if she doesn't want to do it, or if she might make a scene.

Hi J.,

Just because I would have loved to do this myself at your daughter's age, I recommend taking her to a salon to have her all dolled up for the wedding. Do it once several weeks, or months, before the wedding so she can see how her hair will look and how pretty she will look no matter what dress she wears. That will certainly give her something to be excited about. As far as the 3 year old goes, maybe she could sit at the guestbook table with a much older child (teenager) or adult (whoever will be attending the table). This will also depend on how well behaved she is. If she won't do well there, at least make sure she gets the same amount of pampering as your older daughter. That will make her feel special too.

B.

I just got married on the 17th and my Granddaughters who are 7 and almost 2 were both my Flower girls. The older one was less nervous as she was asked to help her little sis as they both walked down the aisl. They share the attention and it is even more precious. Also while we were standing at the alter we allowed the younger one to move about and did what she wanted, my Son in law kept a watchful eye on her as her Mother was one of my Bridesmaids. It worked and my Wedding was even more special. The cost of another dress was not a problem and everyone was happy.
Good Luck
52 year Old Mom and Grandmom
K.