O.H.
I have 3/3 spec needs kids. My 12 yo is ADHD, my 15 yo is ADD/Asperger's and my SD is 19, lives with her mom full time and is moderately retarded. So I get it.
As far as mornings go, my kids have always been pretty good. I just have to keep prompting them when they were younger, but now they get up and do everything on their own. But I think it helps that they are natural early birds. Not one single time have I had to fight to get them out of bed. That being said, my son, the 12 yo is NOT good in the morning. My husband would always be on him about something and it was a daily fight. I hated it. So I finally had to say to my husband, just don't talk to him! Literally say NOTHING except good morning! Before my son's meds would kick in, it just isn't worth it. Now I'm the only one that deals with him in the morning. I is much easier.
As far as 'friends' go, its hard for these kids to make and keep friends. I have talked to them and said that if they have one really good friend, that's all they need. Luckily, they have that at school. We recently switched churches and my son right away found a friend that he hangs with, my 15 yo is still struggling with that.
All of my kids have IEP's in school. They go to public and a charter school. We have learned that you just can't assume the teachers know everything they need to by reading the IEP. We have had to fight, fight, fight, every year when the kids get new teachers, for their rights and for the teachers to understand the kids issues and how to handle them. I do have to say that the public schools have done MUCH better than the private ones with following the IEPs. But again, we are on them constantly. And meds have really helped our son with the ADHD. But like someone else said, every time he has a growth spurt we have to adjust his meds and doses. It's an ongoing battle.
All of us have our "issues". I don't want to say it never gets better or easier, it does as they get older because they understand themselves better and that they have issues. But as they get older, it's new issues, if that makes sense. But we all grow and change, some of us just need more adjustments than others. Hang in there. Our kids will always need us no matter how old they get. Good luck.