8 Month Old Without Day Sleeping Schedule and Poor Night Sleep, 5 Am Getting Up

Hi there, I am trying to relate your story to my own when my son was that age. First off my son still had naps every 2 hours at that age, and they lasted 30-40 mins. I should mention that he showed tired signs and that is why he napped so frequently. His naps did not consolidate until 9 mos old. He also woke up very early until about 11mos old.

Is this behavior over several months? Or is there a growth spurt in progress? Could he have a milk allergy or food reaction going on? I think you are doing a lot of things right and it may be time to talk to your Dr as he/she may ask the right questions to get to the bottom of your situation.

I perhaps he is hungry and that is leading to his repeated attempts to rouse you? Is he eating well during the day?

As far as falling asleep on his own, maybe start with getting him to sleep on his own at the beginning of his night. Start with that and then proceed to naps. Maybe the way you are placing him in the crib is waking him up at naptime. Is he cozy and warm and then the crib is chilly? Are you watching your baby for cues that he is ready to nap, maybe you are waitiing too long and missing his sleepy window ( ie , moving into the over tired state)?

Concerning his early wake up--have you been pushing back in 15 minute increments to see if you can get a later wake up.? (ie, have the increments been small?) At his age, you might not get more than so many hours at night

I know you are sooo tired, hope something I said helps you sort out your situation.

You need to teach your son how to put himself to sleep. It sounds like he has no self-soothing skills, so he wakes after each sleep cycle and cries out for you. So, you need to do two things: (1) teach self-soothing skills and (2) break him of his waking habits.

He should have TWO naps, going down for the first 2 hours after waking, then 3 hours for the second, and then 4 hours for bed. This is a basic pattern that most babies develop by 6 months.

He doesn't settle at 3 am because he knows he can come into your bed. So if you want him to settle, stop taking him into your bed.

He is waking up at 5:30 because you are putting him to bed too late. Try putting him to bed at 15 minute intervals early every night until you hit the "12" hour zone. My son goes to bed at 6 and wakes at 6 (He's 9 months). He still nurses at 4am, but by next week, I hope to have him broken of this habit. ( I use lessening nurse time and startling to reset sleep cycle methods)

In any case, if I was you, this is what I would do: Since you already sooth from outside the crib, continue to do so, but shorten the time and try to get to the point where you can just say, "it's time for bed, go to sleep." Second, you need to learn to 'listen" to his sleep ready signs, that way you can teach him how to put himself to bed. Ideally, you put them in the crib before they are truly ready for sleep, because if they get over-tired, they won't sleep! Signs of readiness include a giant yawn. When you see that yawn, get him in the crib. From now on, he needs to go in the crib WIDE awake. It will take some time, but you need to teach him how to fall asleep on his own. Also, you need to put him on a real schedule. The schedule is great because you then don't have to watch the baby. You can in fact watch the clock. My little guy goes down for naps and bed within 10 minutes of a set time every day, and he falls asleep within 5 minutes. It's all about cultivating a habit.

Two books that might be of help, both of which will be at the library: Baby Whisperer and Healthy Sleep Habits.

The book Healthy Sleep Habits Healthy Child by Dr. Marc Weissbluth is really helpful. I followed the doctor's advice for both my kids -- my first was a great sleeper, my second wasn't. But his advice worked for both of them -- it just took a lot more time and patience with my second. I think kids are just different -- some start sleeping through the night and taking regular naps more easily and at an earlier age than others -- but they all need to get there at some point in order to be healthy. And as parents we need our sleep too! I think by 8 months your baby is old enough to be sleeping for longer stretches at night and to start napping for 1 or 2 hours twice a day. He'll be much better off for it. Get the book and follow the advice. You'll be glad you did!

Your son might be a natural co-sleeper. My daughter was like that. She could not be sleep trained and defied the instructions in books. Our pediatrician says that not every child can be sleep trained, and those children usually sleep better with someone than alone. After all, that IS how nature designed babies and small children to sleep: tucked up safely against someone. So we put her in our bed, and she started sleeping much better, much longer. We found this much easier for everybody involved. We all get a lot more sleep now.

if he is growing happy and healthy i wouldnt worry. he just isnt big sleeper. Id try to move his naps to 2 a day at this age. that may help. This is also teething phase so hard to tell if its just teething. i wouldnt bother trying to make much sense of his sleep until hes got all his teeth

If he is up at 5:00 or 5:30, he should not lay down for a morning nap until 8:30 or 9:00. He should be tired enough by this point to sleep at least an hour if not more. Once he wakes up from the morning nap play with him, feed him, and play some more! By the time 1:00pm comes around he should be good and ready for another nap. Do not allow the little cat naps during the day! Once you get him on a good nap schedule he will sleep at night. Another idea, he is old enough to move into his own room(if possible). By moving him to his own room, most likely when he wakes up he will put himself back to sleep. I'm not saying this will happen in one night, but it will happen. Lots of patience momma, it will happen once you have him on a normal nap schedule. Best of luck to you!

I am probably chimming in late, but he should be in his own room if possible, and not in your bed, unless you are OK with him being there for the next several years! Set 2 or 3 day naps-even if they are only 30 minutes, and then to bed for the night early--when he shows signs of being tired and crabby---even if that is 6:30 in the evening. Unfortunately 5 am is not that crazy for an 8 month old, but he will probably go down for a nap by 8am. Kids not sleeping well at night are most likely Overtired from other bad habits during the day. Your social life might be non-existant for a while, but having a healthy kid on a good schedule will bring you many benefits later! Anyway, babies' habits are like the weather in Chicago--wait ten minutes and it will change. He is growing so fast, soon enough he will be down to fewer naps, sleeping better at night, and doing all kinds of new things! Get the book Healthy Sleep, Happy Child by Dr. Marc Weisbluth. Invaluable! Do what he says, even if it doesn't seem logical to you. Also, talk to your Pediatritian to make sure nothing else might be wrong. Good Luck! Our boy is 17 and turned out just fine even with all the stuff like this we worried about!