I have asked this question again, but I thought I would throw it out there again.
My husband is a little stressed again at work. He is a teacher in a bad area and so he is losing motivation to continue with his job, but he knows that we have no choice but for both of us to work. We don't have a lot of money so some presents are really possible. He is picky with his friends and only has a couple that he will hang out with on a regular basis and we have two little ones so our time is precious.
I was just trying to think of ways to keep him motivate and happy (other than the obvious ladies!). He is teaching and in class two nights a week and with all that plus the stresses of his job and our crazy family stuff right now, it seems like any plans we make either spend $ we don't want to spend or seem like a good plan until we take the time to do it and then it is just expending energy we don't have (going out of town for the weekend etc).
What kind of things can you think of to help lift his spirits a little?
A massage! Even if it is by you. Buy some massage oil. You can find some nice oil at Bath and Body Works. Light some candles (just the unscented candles because some men arent fond of the smelly ones), dim the lights, and give him a wonderful massage.
OR
You can get him a gift card to a really nice spa for a hot stone massage. These are not very expensive, depending on where you go. And they feel so good!
Aw, come on--go with the obvious! LOL
(And it's FREE!)
Sexting works for us (well, not at SCHOOL obviously!)
:)
Stick with the obvious!!
The "obvious" answer sounds good.
The other obvious one seems to be spending some time and really babying him. Like having a couple of his absolute favorite meals for dinner and making enough to have it be lunches too. When my husband is stressed I like to really get detailed. Instead of making our usual breakfast: eggs, coffee, maybe cereal, for example, I'll get up a few minutes earlier - really, this only takes an extra few minutes!!! - and make biscuits from scratch, gravy, eggs, coffee, and juice and set it all up for him on the table.
Sometimes we get so wrapped up in the day to day crazy that we forget that the special stuff isn't really that special, we just forget to do it. The other night, my hubby didn't protest when I wanted to head right in to bed after the babies went down and I woke up to a completely straightened house. It only took him a little extra effort (he did it during commercial breaks...) and I got to start my day in a much less stressed place.
So I would say look around and see what little things you can do that make his routine easier. Even just setting his keys next to his wallet on the table instead of him needing to grab them from two different places can make a day better.
Is it possible for you to set something up so that he can come home to a night by himself? Like could you get him some dinner, snacks, beer, etc., maybe rent him a movie and then take the kids somewhere by yourself for the evening? Maybe they could even spend the night at a relative's house or something? If it's on a weeknight, you could maybe hit the local mall, grab some dinner, run around, window shop, etc. One of my favorite things to do is take the kids to the community center pool (even if you don't belong it's not terribly expensive to use it for the night). We swim for an hour to two hours and then I bathe them in the family locker room and put their PJs on. I bring snacks and sandwiches, they eat and then they go right home and go to bed. If you could do something like that then you two would even have a little while to spend relaxing together!
Maybe buy a book on "how to give a massage" and wrap it up for him open. Maybe put it in his car after he goes to bed, so it's waiting on him when he gets in his car to go to work. Make a coupon book to go with it that says "1 hour of reading the book together time" and another coupon for "15 minute massage from me" and another for "30 minute massage from me."
If you don't want to spend the money on buying a book, maybe check one out at the library and wrap it. Just be sure to let him know that the book is due back on ______ date, so the coupons have to be redeemed by that date.
Other thought: invite his couple of friends over for a BBQ one evening. You could even make it a surprise. Ask them to BYOB. You provide the rest, plus a 6 pack for him. All it would cost is a couple of lbs of hamburger meat, some buns, chips, an extra 6-pack. PLAN that the guys will stay up late and have a couple too many. Now of course you either have to provide a place for the friends to sleep at your house, or you have to pre-plan for you to be their DD, and willing to pick them up in the morning to come back to your house to retrieve their vehicles.
We are in the same boat. And to top it off, our whole family got ringworm from an adopted kitten and so having to go through that hassle, and out car just broken down for the 10th time, he's been working on it for 3 days $1000 later and he's hauling it to a lot right now to try and trade it in for parts, plus, he's stressed at work and family stuff too.
So, in two weeks, we are going camping and visiting friends/family we haven't seen in a long time over a weekend. Take a few days off, rejuvenate, look for solutions to problems. There's go to be something cheap and in the area that you can do to get away.
As for during the week, we bake cookies, and watch a family movie, have family scripture time and prayer. Then we stay up late talking and hanging out. Somehow, it helps us decompress a little. We also make stuff, like we like to make puppets together or work in the garden. Just try and do something every few days for a couple of hours that you all enjoy. One thing we did a few months back, is we went to a concert. It wasn't a huge expensive one, but it was so fun.
