Advice - Daughter Problems in School Because She Takes Too Long to Do Her Work??

Wait, is she 4 or 5, was there a typo?
Why would she have sheets, homework, assignments and writing in preschool?
A little more info would be helpful :)

My son was like that. In first and second grade I asked his teachers to keep him inside from recess in third grade it got worse and his grades started to go down hill, he started medication and is back on track. I would say talk to the school and pediatrician maybe she would qualify for an iep (for at least the writing my son sees the ot) and kep an eye on it. My pediatrician says kids usually are diagnosed in kindergarten those are the off the wall kids then around third/forth grade the kids that have difficulty focusing are usually diagnosed because grades start to decline.

Lots of 5yo's don't focus well over long periods of time. Some thoughtful educators argue that children that young shouldn't be given lots of sit-down, written work. Those who have less aptitude for this sort of work will become discouraged or sour about school. That's a sad thing in a young child, especially because they tend to catch up a few years later if allowed to learn at their own optimal speed.

I encourage you to do some research of your own so you can advocate for your child's normal and real needs. Here's a good starting place by educator Alfie Kohn: http://www.alfiekohn.org/index.php .

Also, google Learning Styles. There are lots of things you can to to encourage your daughter once you have a sense of how she learns best. Most elementary schools (and kindergartens) take learning styles into account.

I would wonder about a school or a teacher that made 4 year-olds sit and do multiple work sheets. For an hour?! That's not how children that age learn. They learn by doing and playing!

My daughter is going into 4th grade this year. She is in accelerated Math, a G&T enrichment program, scored between the 97th and 99th percentile on her end-of-year tests, and she has what her 3rd grade teacher described as a "possible learning disability" in writing. She writes slowly and with a lot of difficulty and her spelling is not good at all. This has been a frustration for her, but I am not overly concerned. She also was way behind "grade level" for reading, too, up until the end of 2nd grade, and now she excels in reading.

Children's brains, and abilities, develop at different rates. You won't know until about 3rd grade which areas your daughter truly excels in or has difficulty with. I recommend reading "NurtureShock: New Thinking About Children" by Po Bronson and Ashley Merryman for the latest research in child development. This may help you not stress about your child, and also stand up for her with her teachers.

Why would 4 or 5 year olds be working on writing for a full hour?
That is too long. Are they in kindergarten?

I can see them doing maybe half an hour, but even then that is a stretch if it is just them writing on their own.

If they are following the teachers directions, then maybe 30 minutes would be ok, because the children would not be expected to actually write for that length of time..

She would have to have amazing hand strength and the children would have to be pretty experienced to be expected to do this.. Was this the end of the school year?

Maybe your child was too young at the time. Maturity is needed for concentration and sitting and doing solitary work. She sounds too young for this. Maybe this year she could handle it since she will know what is expected..

She could have a rare form of dyslexia. I read very well and in 5th grade I tested at a 10th grade level in History and Geography but Alegbra looks like hieroglyphics to me, Geometry I get. I have difficulty spelling and if I don't write down or print out directions I get lost easily, making left turns for right for example. I will also easily transpose numbers if I have to rattle off a phone number or address. It is a form of dyslexia but not as common as the reading form.

She may also have difficulty with small muscle control. Try exercises that include stringing beads and other games that require her to use her fine muscle control. If she has the dificulty with small or fine muscle control it's just a matter of her learning to control the muscles in her hands and that will take time. (Uncontrolled coloring -- outside the lines for instance, shows a lack of small muscle control.)

You could also help her by breaking down her assignments at home. Get her some workbooks and coloring books from a toy store based on learning. Have her do 2-3 pages in a day, watch her to see how long she can hold her attention on each page. Let her take a break at the end of her attention span the first week, then start setting the timer adding 2-3 minutes each week, when the timer goes off she gets a break. By adding time she will learn to focus for just a little bit longer each week.

You can also look into Tae Kwon Do for her. The forms help to teach focus and consentration. And the repetitious right/left punching and kicking helps to connect the right/left brain energies. I can't explain how it works but it really does. After I started training in TKD I noticed a huge difference in my left/right disorientation, it's just easier now.

I've been subbing at the same school for 10 yrs. We do have some very slow workers in part by, easily distracted, loves to socialize, etc.

When someone chooses to waste time... they do the work at recess. NOTE: I said "chooses". There are children who believe school is playtime all day.

When it is realized that maybe a child is having true difficulty completing work, rewards are put in place... (EX: if you finish that sheet in this amount of time, you get a sticker for the treasure box , etc)

Some children are just not interested and refuse to do the work.

Most of the time, a closer look is needed from the resource department to make sure there are no issues,,, ex, dyslexia, etc. When it is deemed that a child is simply wasting time due to distraction, etc... they lose priviliges. This usually works.

She is young and kudos to you for being on top of things and working with her. I wouldn't put too much pressure on her.. Get a feel for how she does this year.. It could simply be a personality conflict with a teacher... that happens!!

I assume this was Kindergarten (if it was preschool they were very inappropriate and she was just acting her age) Either way do a lot of fun activities at home to increase her fine motor coordination and her stamina in her hands. Lots of coloring, play dough, crafts, games like operation and Perfection. Give her Omega 3 to try to help her focus and concentration. Where I teach we do not give the Kindergartners erasors because they will spend too much time erasing imperfect letters and they do not have the hand strength to erase well. We tell them to cross out mistakes. We do not expect anything close to perfect from Kindergartners! Dont panic yet, its prob just maturity. If the problem continues ask to talk to the OT at her school.

I always suggested this idea to parents: Get an egg timer or set the kitchen timer for a short period of time. Have your daughter complete short tasks. For example, tell her you will set the timer for 1 minute and have her write her name on her paper. You can practice this with all sorts of things such as household chores too. Kids are usually drawn to this kind of fun challenge and it helps make them more punctual with completing tasks. If it doesn't, it can be a good indicator of attention deficit disorder. Does she tend to daydream a lot? Can she stay focused on an activity that she is interested in? It might be a good idea to talk to your pediatrician just to get their perspective as well.
Writing is a tough skill and kids frustrate because it is something they want to master quickly and easily,but it just takes time. It is the first foray into fine motor skills. I would let her write on her own for as much as she is able, but if she starts to frustrate take over the writing for her before she has a meltdown. Hope this helps!
A.

My first reaction was: "she is 5, why do they have to do so much class work?" Even in Kindergarten my kids did not have a lot of class work, and only 1 sheet of "fill in the blank" type homework. But indeed, if there is an issue it is best to catch it early. My 11 year old is finally on an IEP after 2.5 years of struggling and us fighting with the district. In 3rd grade her grades started slipping and we worked with teachers and "reading recovery" to try to get her on track. It was not a glaring problem since she is very bright and was able to work around a lot of her deficit. But by 5th grade she was miserable and hated going to school and cried every single morning. It took a legal advocate for the school to accept the finding of dyslexia and inattentive ADD from our neuro psychologist. Our daughter has a high IQ and learns easily, but has a slow processing speed and the dyslexia/ADD is making focusing and reading very difficult. However, my daughter can focus and gets lots done if she enjoys the topic or chose what to do herself. It cannot hurt to ask for a baseline testing to be done, by requesting in writing from the public school principal that you are concerned about learning issues with your daughter. Be as specific as you can in your letter. Very legally defined time lines go into effect as soon as you request your daughter to be tested - a local advocate would be able to advise you. Good luck.

I've been told that I was the same way so my parents delayed starting me in kindergarten by a year - worked out great!

My son was pokey, too, in K. And, yes, Kindergarteners do a LOT of worksheets.
Stress to her that it doesn't have to be "perfect" all the time.
Discuss with her teachers this year strategies and ways t keep her "on task". K is hard--they get the hang of it eventually, though.

Talk to her pediatrician. It may be normal but what if she has a learning or behavioral disability like dyslexia or ADHD-inattentive type? It's worth at least investigating so you can help her thrive this next school year.

Also put in a written request with the school district to have her evaluated for an IEP or 504 plan. These can help her with special accommodations that will allow her to finish her work and not be penalized if she needs more time than others. The district psychologist may also give you a sense of whether her challenges are normal or not.

Don't brush off the concerns. The earlier you can get help for your child, the better, if she does have a medical challenge causing the problems.

Good luck!

Contact the school. Maybe have a conference w/ the teacher and the case manager. See if you can have her tested now for any help she may qualify for.

These were some of the early signs w/ my son that the school missed and even though I pointed things out they dismissed my concerns. He ended up not getting help until the END of his 6th grade and school was always a struggle. He was/is very bright but he struggled with a few key steps early on. For a long time, his "brightness" hid the gaps so until he reached middle school they kept missing it. Thinking back, these were thing we struggled w/ at home too.

They may be able to get her extra time to complete assignments (as long as she is actively working), extra time focused on writing or whatever her weak points are.

What many don't realize that special education services does not mean a kid is not smart or is lacking in all aspects but rather for many, there may be a discrepancy between math vs language or ability and performance.

Hi, I'm unclear if she is in preschool or kindergarten last year? At her age, it could be age/maturity, or it could be something else. Both of mine have always worked very slowly and were diagnosed with a processing disorder. This would require a diagnosis from a psychiatrist. If that is what it is, it's not something that can be fixed, but accommodated - setting a timer to help them pace themselves. If it's a detriment to her learning, she can be evaluated for an IEP or 504.

One of my girls was a majoy perfectionist in pre-k, K and 1st grade. One time in K, she tore up her worksheet because it was "not good enough", that is what she told the teacher. The teacher did tell me though that is can be very common for the youngest to be this way, especially girls. She is still somewhat a perfectionist and gets very frustrated if she does not get her work right away. She is entering 7th grade this year and is in some advanced level classes. I would check to see if she understands everything and if just a matter of needing to be perfect, help her through that . It does not mean she has some learning disability which is what one mom suggested to me after she helped out for a week when my kids were in K. It takes a lot of patience and stressing that her work is good, awesome, fantastic.

My daughter was and is the same way. It drives everyone crazy.
I think it's ADD.
I have never had my daughter tested for ADD but I'm sure that, that is what it is.

When my daughter does her work, she understands it. She knows what to do. She just takes her time. It's like she is in her own little world. I call it LALA LAND.
My daughter is getting a lot better than what she used to be like. But we need her to get faster.

I homeschool all my kids now, but when they were in public school I had to have her teacher send home her unfinished work so that it could be worked on at home and sent back to be graded.

My daughter is very smart but she takes too long to do her work.

Don't worry, she'll out grow it.

I would go to the school now and talk to the school guidance counselor and explain to them that you and your daughter really need an extra sweet teacher who is understanding and who won't be easily frustrated with her.

When school starts talk to her new teacher RIGHT AWAY, that way she has heads up.
Tell the new teacher that you would appreciate it if she doesn't get mad and frustrated with your daughter about this. Explain to her that your daughter needs kindness and understanding. Tell the new teacher that you will continue to work with your daughter and help encourage her to work faster. Tell her that any ideas that she has that can help encourage your daughter would be welcome.

I wish you all the best with this.

Talk to BOTH her pediatrician and the school. Sounds like she may need an IEP.. She may benefit from occupational therapy.