Am I Being Unreasonable? - Deep Gap,NC

I'm wondering if she's eating so much because she's not eating enough at home? Does she seem like that could be the issue? If it is, considering documenting everything and calling CPS. It sounds to me like this child is being neglected.

Any childcare I've heard of, the food is provided UNLESS the child is on a special diet and this is discussed ahead of time. If you are running it as a business, and logging business expenses as a tax write-off, you can deduct a certain amount per day for food expenses.

I think at that great daily rate, she should be supplying at least the milk and two snacks. I would provide the meals (breakfast and lunch) so that all of the kids would be eating the same thing. The child is lucky that she's brought to daycare every day so she is being well cared for at least part of the time!

Every daycare provider I've ever had let me know when I hired them whether they provided food or I needed too. Did you let her know when you took her on that she needed to send food?

And if she eats so much at your house I'm wondering how much she gets fed at home and whether or not you need to call CPS!

Um...you need to increase the price or ask the mother to bring her some food. That's a hellofa deal she is getting!

Well, I agree you are wildly underpaid. Since it's unlikely she could find 11 hours of daily childcare anywhere else for that price, I think it's ok to raise your rates.

I am glad the child has so much time with you though, you'll make a positive influence on her life she might not otherwise have.

So yeah, be GOOD, but don't be a martyr, you know?

:)

I charge $25 a day for 4 year olds and that does NOT include early morning hours!
If you think she's being seriously neglected, you need to alert cps. If she's just not upkempt, you could word it like this:
"I really don't mind dressing (insert name) in the morning, but with our busy schedule, I don't have to time to bathe her as well. Can you please make sure that she's bathed the night before and bring along some breakfast? She seems to be going through a growth spurt!"

Usually, the sitter provides the food, but most parents will still include a snack and a sippy with a drink in it. But really, to cover your costs including the crazy early am time, you need to up your prices, which is reasonable. A lot of providers have contracts that covers the cost of food, in addition to the cost of you needing to provide diapers/wipes as well. The daycare lady has some forms that you can look through if you need to go back and make a contract.
http://thedaycarelady.com/form.htm

As for the neglect issues, I like what Bethyskids says about speaking with her mom about it. In the case of blisters or anything like that or neglect, then take pictures, document, call cps if the neglect seems more than just lazy parenting. I wonder if this child is being fed at home due to her eating so much at your house.

You are getting ROBBED. I am so sorry! Please work out a different plan with the parents. You should be charging at least 40 bucks a day and the parents need to provide food and properly clean/clothe their daughter. You should report them to CPS for neglect---what they are doing is hurting their child! The mom should absolutely be providing her food and milk and paying you more as well. Please talk to her asap. If she isn't willing to budge, find a new job.

M

T.:

Sounds like you need to have a talk with the mom. Get a contract in place and tell her what you expect to be paid starting 1 Jan 2012, etc. If you don't have a contract in place - people can walk all over you.

I don't know what the going rate in your area is - but $20 a day for 13 hours work - in my opinion? UNDER PAID...that is like $1.50 per HOUR!!!

Charge a flat rate by the week - more like $150 to $175. Sorry - the 0530 drop off? I would charge extra just for that alone. Call me rude - but that's just way to freaking early.

As to food? When my kids went to day care - food was provided. However, it was included in the charge per week. This was something that was discussed PRIOR to my children attending the day care.

The kid probably eats because she doesn't get food at home or at least not a lot.

As to the other problems? Document and take pictures. Keep a log of how she comes to you...dirty, same clothes as day before, bruises, blisters, etc.
If it becomes a habit - you have your documentation and can report her to CPS. As a day care provider (if you are licensed, etc.) aren't you required to report? I know here in VA we are. Blisters from sunburn once? Okay - stuff happens - but 3 times? That sounds like neglect to me.

Bottom line?
Get a contract in place with the parent(s).
State food must be provided - either daily or weekly.
State when payment is due.
State how much she is to pay you. (truly - aren't you worth more than $1.50 per hour?)

If she was in child care she would be paying just a bit more, like $25 per day and the care giver would provide all food and drinks. They are also professional care givers with hours and hours of training.

If you cannot afford to feed her then tell the parents to bring food but be prepared to not like it because I bet it's not good nutritious food. She probably only gets good food at your home.

No you are not even getting paid enough to watch her much less feed her. It's time to renegotiate your rates. Since these seem like the type of parents that would either not send the food, or send junk food, increase your rates to include food.

Also, it appears that you should consider reporting them to CPS. Start documenting incidents by writing down dates and times and what happened. When appropriate, take a photo.

I pay a friend to watch my girls from 7:30-3:30 and pay her $35. She makes the kids breakfast and lunch. $20 seems way too low- that is not even $2 an hour and food costs a couple of bucks a day.

You should absolutely be paid more, but that's not the thing that concerns me the most. The blisters from the sunburns and the blisters from not being changed are serious things and need to be addressed.

If a child came into my care with severe sunburns, I would be very firm with the mom that she is always to protect her baby from sunburn. If I were you, I would also tell the mom that she needs to keep the baby clean and her diaper changed. Sometimes people just don't know how to care properly for their children and they need to be showed how to do it.

So, my advice is:
1. Up your rates
2. Be a mentor of sorts to the mom about how to care for her child's hygiene needs.
3. Call CPS if things don't change and you continue to see signs of neglect.

there will always be that problem with parents and sitters. the boundaries etc etc. I read an article about this not to long ago about how difficult it is sometimes for the sitters to care differently for the child and how hard it is for the sitter to look at the things the parents do, etc etc. but to answer your question, no you're not getting paid enough, at least ask to pay u more for the food u are supplying . best of luck. keep doing a good job

man this sounds like a tough one from the way you talk about how she is taken care of she may not eat at home if you can afford it please keep feeding her with out saying anything. but you need to call cps as a child care provider you are a mandated reporter

I would up it. I pay 15 dollars an hour foe child care for my 3 kids and I provide food for the babysitter as well as my kids!

First of all photograph the things that happen to her and keep a journal. That is if you want to go on babysitting her. The child is very hungry because they are not feeding her. She's a child of neglect. I would tell the parents to bring her clean and washed up with a sandwich to tide her over until breakfast.
Twenty dollars a day is what dog sitters get to keep the dog overnight and walk it. You bring your own feed. How much does daycare cost per month for such a young child? Do you need a license to be a daycare provider in NC. If so get one so that you can charge the going rate. Call around and ask other daycare providers as if you wanted to bring a child similar to their daycare. Call in the surrounding area where you live.
Classes of daycare kids each pay $150 per week where I am.
And, if you feel that the parents are endangering the child's health and well being call children's services.

Because of her age alone, I'd raise your rates. Probably should ask a little more for food too. That's just my opinion.

The mom should either pay you more or provide you food. This is her child and she needs to have responsibility with her. The other stuff makes me worry about neglect. Sunburns can get so bad with babies and its so painful and sad. You are not being unreasonable at all! You have the right to report if you are worried about the baby and you can do it anonymously. Some may think this is harsh, but after seeing so many babies be injured from stuff like this in my adult life time i don't play with that.

NO, you are not getting paid enough to provide food. That's low pay! I live in a very cheap area, and that is low pay. The cheapest daycare around here that includes food is $30/day. The norm is about $36 a day even when parents have to send lunch in this area, again, CHEAP area. Sitters are $8-$12 per hour. When I have a sitter, I provide all my own food on top of that rate.

You cannot provide her food from $20, ESPECIALLY if it's not in your guidelines. Daycares here are very clear on whether they provide lunches and snack, or parents have to send it. Sitters don't provide food beyond some light snacks (cheerios) if they have the kids to their house.

I would tell them they need to either send x amount of food, OR pay $5 more per day for you to provide it.
Now obviously, if these losers don't comply, you still need to feed this child A LOT, and I would dig into my own pocket and find state resources etc to do so, but do try to get the parents to step up. Tell them exactly what she ate on a day when you fed her a lot, and let them know from now on they need to provide it.
And I'm so sorry you are witnessing neglect. I'm so glad their baby is with you all day. Keep up the great work and keep an eye out for this child.

I would do it like this: On your own, figure out how much per day what the child NEEDS to eat costs, and let the parents know starting in January, your new daily rate "with food included" is X. That way you're not asking them to be personally involved with budgeting or sending food. They seem incapable. If they grumble, pull out your list of WHAT the baby eats, so they SEE the clear daily cost to you. Say, "When I deduct food from $20, that leaves $15. My rate is not $15, and I never said food was included." (If you have a signed contract stating you provide food, that's another issue)

I provide all food and get paid 25 per day. I don't know your area going rate. But I can tell you that you can deduct a little more than 3 dollars per day from your taxes, as well as many other deductible expenses. It's your job to set your rates. I care for multiple children on multiple shifts. Some eat more and some eat less. I don't adjust my rates per their appetite.

i always fed the kids i watched. i usually had pbj on hand quesadilla etc easy foods

If you are asking this question here, then you aren't being paid enough. Tell them that you are doubling the rates. They will either pay it, or find someone else.

I really think you should do this - it is not worth spending all your time sitting others' children for this little bit of money.

Dawn

Most places around her are 35 a day (some (not all) include one lunch and two snacks) and they also are 7:30am to 6pm. Granted they are not at a uge professional daycare with teachers...BUT there are bennefits to a smaller place and with the early drop off you should be charging way more. I would think a flat fee per week of 150 atleast.

That's pitiful. I am not sure I could watch her without always being upset and wanting to call DHS on the mother. So sad.

As far as being paid enough, no, you are not. I used to do it 7:30am to 5pm and got $35 a day and she supplied all food, diapers, drinks, and even wipes. That was not enough at the time so I know $20 is not enough. That's like $2 an hour isn't it?? Wow, no way. That mom won't find anyone else to do it for that much so I would tell her the next time she comes to pick up her daughter that you will need to discuss more money and that she will need to start supplying the food for her daily. Tell her that it is costing you to watch her. Stay strong, this mom is not only taking advantage of you but she is abusing her child so dont' back down. What a ....????

Based on how unhappy you sound with the parenting provided by her parents, I would suggest considering whether you want to do this at all. Money seems less the issue than your underlying irritation. Despite the fact that your irritation is not with the child, the child is likely to pick up on it - which will not help her, and will make your job more difficult