I just found out I was pregnant today via a home pregnancy test. While it was not 100% planned, it isn't that much of a surprise and I am really excited. However, I can't help but be consumed with worry! I worried throughout my entire first pregnancy and I had nothing to worry about because I had a dream pregnancy! I don't know why I feel the need to torture myself by reading "stuff" on the internet. It seems all I read are stories about miscarriages, and it's gotten me so worried. Both of my sister-in-laws had miscarriages after a healthy first baby. And one of those sister-in-laws had an ectopic pregnancy. So it is very fresh in my mind and I feel like everyone has at least one miscarriage. I'm so worried because I honestly am not strong enough to handle something that devastating, I would fall apart!
I'm only maybe 3 weeks pregnant but I'm concerned that the embryo is in my fallopian tube because I have a bit of sensitivity on my left side. The sensitivity is similar to ovulation pains, but not as strong or as constant. Could this be all in my head?
Could someone please send me some good news and tell me they didn't have a miscarriage? Give me some hope.
Wow, I am so overwhelmed with the many responses and support! You all are right, I can not change anything by worrying but I can change my attitude. Having a toddler to chase after is indeed a good distraction. Lots of prayer and scripture reading helped me through my first pregnancy and I will do it again this time around! There is no reason for me to worry and I will stop reading all the sad stories on the internet, it does me no good! Thanks for all of your encouraging words, I am going to try my hardest to think positively every day. With that said, I am so excited for this new adventure!
Hi K.-
Relax, everything will be fine. I've had 3 pregnancies and no miscarriages. My sister had two pregnancies and no miscarriages and my sister in law has had two pregnancies with no miscarriages. It definitely happens!
Good luck with everything,
K.
K., the pain you feel is could very well be ligament pain or an ovarian fluid filled cyst that was created due to you ovulating (very normal and they disappear later on in the pregnancy). I had these; I thought I had an ectopic pregnancy too until an U/S showed this gigantic cyst (that did disappear eventually). While the chances of a miscarriage are 20%, you will most likely have a very smooth pregnancy. My advice to you is to stay off the computer and try to think positive. If you were to miscarry, by some chance, you have to remember that something didn't work correctly during conception. It's nothing anyone is at fault for, it just happens. I think we all worry about miscarriage in that first trimester (I know I was a nervous wreck with my second pregnancy, in particular). It's because we know so much more than we did with our first. I'm sure it doesn't help that you know a couple of people who just experienced this. Throw yourself into your 14 month old and try to get through these next couple of months. Not everyone has a miscarriage.
My parents always told me, "Can you change the outcome by worrying about it? If you CAN, go ahead and worry, if it's not going to change anything - DON'T". I can't think of one thing you can change by worrying about it and there's so much bad that you do to your mental state and your body by worrying. Are you a Christian? Read Paul's letters - start with Philipians. Do Not Fear and Do not be afraid were words spoken often by God and Christ. God IS in control and you can rest in HIS arms. Tell Him your concerns and then let them go......
Definitely relax. I am ready to go any day with my second and have had no miscarriages. The most helpful thing you can do for that little one is to just set a dr appt, get rest, eat right and be happy! Sometimes it so hard not to worry as a mom, but I think we just have to make a choice to let go and enjoy every moment we have with our children. I know lots of people who have had miscarriages, some in my own family. I have started each of my pregnancies by telling people I am having a baby rather than that I am pregnant. It is my own little way of declaring that I am more than pregnant, I am in the process of producing a baby, just a personal thing I have done because the second I get prego I believe that I will have my child. I guess because life can be so unpredictable it makes me fell extra confident to say I am having a baby. I wish you all the best and don't worry!! Things will work out great:)
I think when we are pregnant, we react to the tiniest little twitches and wonder something might be wrong. Thats normal. Try to relax and read uplifting things. Don't let yourself look up all the bad stuff. It may happen, as it does to many women, but think do things to keep your mind off of it--whatever that may be. Hugs to you.
I only know 1 person who had miscarriages. There is really not much you can do to prevent one so worrying really doesn't do you any good. Just try to forget about it and just think that you will deal with it if it happens rather than dealing with it everyday of your pregnancy! Your doctor will be able to fill you in on the likeliness of you having a miscarriage
Hi K.,
I had a miscarriage first, and then two healthy babies. When I was miscarrying, I spent a lot of time on the web trying to figure out whether or not I was miscarrying. You know what? It didn't change the outcome one bit. If you are going to miscarry, you are going to miscarry, period. If you are not going to miscarry, then you are not going to miscarry, period. So, stop worrying about things you have no control over and enjoy your pregnancy!
Congratulations and I wish you the best!!
L.
You should not worry because it could be bad for you and the baby. Happy thoughts!! I have 3 children and all healthy. Never had a miscarriage or any other problems except they were all late coming out. LOL Take it easy and enjoy your pregnancy.
First of all, congratulations!!! What an exciting time for you. Secondly, yes, I believe you are over-reacting. From what I know about ectopic pregnancies (my best friend had one before she had three children), they usually occur before you even suspect that you're pregnant. The pain you are experiencing could be implantation of the fertilized egg in your uterus. I understand that there can be some pain associated with that. However, I'm no doctor, so you need to consult one if your pain continues.
I never had a miscarriage, and I have two grown children. There are many, many of my friends who never had one, either. You need to relax and get involved with something that will take your mind off of what you fear. (I should think running after a toddler would that care of that!) How about learning a new skill such as crocheting or scrapbooking or even getting involved with Facebook? Anything that will challenge your mind and keep you occupied.
I hope these suggestions help a little.
Hi K.,
You sound like a worry wart like me. I have learned it doesn't do you any good to worry about something that hasn't even happened. For me when I do that I have realized that is like my protection tool in preparing me for the worst that could happen. Stop and enjoy the blessing you have been given again. Worry is worthless, it doesn't do any good for you, and it does not accomplish anything for you. Also, I would stop reading the internet, only read positive pregnancy information, once you see that it is negative close out of it. The internet can drive you nuts if you let it.
Give all your worries to the Man up above!
God Bless,
L.
CALM DOWN!! That little baby growing inside you is a blessing! Quit worrying so much you are only going to harm yourself and the baby. Your state of mind does effect the baby you know. So you have to be conscious of your thoughts. When you start to have bad thoughts STOP yourself and think of something positive. It's only natural to worry about all those things but you have to be concerned with what you can control...and what you can control is your thoughts. It is a big job being pregnant, don't think it's not, the hard part is not the labor it's the 9 months you are carrying the baby. Eat right, take your vitamins and get some exercise, take the other one for walks. Take care and I wish you the best.
K.-
Congratulations! As for your concerns, some women do have miscarriages, many do not. The sensitivity in your side is probably quite normal. I had pains down there for my entire third pregnancy! Your body stretches, the hormones cause your body to change etc. Any number of good things could be causing your sensitivities. Be easy on yourself and remind yourself that your hormones are likely to make you feel completely off-balance the first trimester...and see a doctor so that he/she can ease your mind about medical questions. :)
For goodness sake! You are going to worry yourself so much you are going to make yourself or the baby sick. I have had 2 babies and not one miscarriage. I know hordes of women that have never had a miscarriage. Calm down and have some fun. Not to mention if the worst does happen you no longer have the right to fall apart as you have a child here already. It would be sad but you must go on for the one that is here. Good luck to you and I hope you can calm yourself. Praying is good, maybe some preggo yoga classes?
You should not worry, if this is meant to happen it will, you have one child that you had no problems with, what makes you think that you will have them this time..The other women you talked about are not from the same parents, and they most likely had some problems that caused their miscarrages. It is hard to loose a child been there but why worry about something that you have no control over. See the Dr. take care of yourself and have fun planning for a new addition to your family. Think about names, colors for the room, new baby smells etc. This is a time to be happy and excited for you and your husband...
Hi K.,
You'll be fine. Enjoy your pregnancy. Focus on the miracle your body is capable of producing. If you think about the process and developement it is truely amazing. I had 4 beautiful children. Your a stronger person than you are giving your self credit for. Hope this helps lol.
