Baby Shower Months After Birth?

Once the baby is born, it's really not a shower anymore. Some parents have a meet the baby party, but usually they host it themselves, and usually within a month after the birth. If you wait a few months, and most people have already met the baby and brought/sent a gift, there really is no need for a shower or party.

I think it can be weird or great...it is ALL in the attitude. There are people who find enthusiasm and excitement in life and those who are caged by doing the traditional expected thing. Those who are comfortable speaking frankly about a situation, and those who find discussing it embarrassing. So my advice is to talk to the mommy. Be very specific and have a few options ready. As some suggested it could just be a nice little gathering where folks get to meet the baby. Aske her if she truly has everything she needs, or is she open to some folks giving gifts? Be specific on the invite " your presence is present enough" or "we are having a diaper raffle, if you would like to enter bring size two pampers". The bottom line is a new life came into the world. Do you want to help your friend celebrate that? I am sure you do :) so just relax and work with her to find whatever meets the comfort zone you and she are in. Have fun!

I have been in that place before. I was a teacher due with my first child in mid-March. Because of Christmas break and semester change, my shower was scheduled a lot closer to my due date than my other showers were. I went out on bed-rest at 36 weeks and my school shower was scheduled for 37 weeks. Needless to say, the shower was rescheduled. It was about 6 weeks after my son was born.
It felt weird to have a shower for my son while he was already here. Also, there were a good number of people who bought clothes that he had already outgrown by the time the shower got there.
I also felt like the attendance at the shower was much lower than it would have been if it were held on the original date.

3 months after is very awkward, in my opinion, UNLESS it was a multiple birth and the mother expected to deliver early all along. In that case, if the babies are still in the hospital, I think it's fine to have a shower once they come home so everyone can meet them.

I've been to showers after the baby was born (all planned to be before but the babies came early). All the guests and new parents treated it just like a standard shower except the new baby was in attendance. They were held on the planned date (within a week or two of the birth) so I'm not sure about one so late.

My office threw me a shower when my son was almost 4 months old. The shower wasn't planned until late, but I had my son before the shower, then I was on maternity leave, and then was traveling out of the country with my son for a month, so that was the earliest they could have it! It all depends on the comfort level of the mom and the people who will be coming.

I think its a great idea. I had my baby shower a few months after mine was born. I hate that people have it before the baby comes lol. Isnt the shower for the baby?? Therefore shouldnt the baby be there? Haha.

Anyways maybe you should just make it into a small lunch party with a few decorations, a little cake, finger foods. Nothing fancy just some girls getting together to talk, catch up and see how the baby is growing.
I think it would be fun.

If you dont want to host then you could always tell your friend just that, and offer to help, instead.

I think it would be great to have a party! I like KansasMom's suggestion to call it something else. Calling it by another name might make the idea more comfortable. A "shower" is generally thought of as "pre-event" (pre-wedding or pre-baby); maybe there needs to be an official name for this sort of get-together.

However, a friend of mine and her husband adopted two little boys a couple of years ago, and her friends threw a party for her and brought things toddler boys would need, since their other children were older. So in a sense it was a shower, and the real recipients were right there to take part in it.

I can understand the new mama's wanting to wait for a while. She's up with the baby every night and she's probably exhausted. Give the gal a chance to get back on a more even keel.

I don't like the idea of showers (it's the one way I'm supersticious), so we had "baby welcomings" for both of our kids. The first one we did accept gifts, because we didn't have a shower. The second one we wrote "no gifts" and some people brought something little like bibs or stuffed animals, but I don't think that people spent more than $10, which, in my mind, is about the equivalent of a bottle of wine that I would bring to a holiday party or something. Not a big deal.

Honestly, I'd ask the mom what she wants to do. If she didn't get to have the shower but still needs the stuff that she would have gotten, then I think it would be lovely to host. If she already got that stuff, ask if she'd like to have a party, maybe mentioning "no gifts" or "donation to such and such" instead. It's possible that people haven't come by with gifts at all, and she's really hoping that someone will get her a high chair and a stroller.

Finally, if you really don't want to host no matter what, beg off with some personal excuse: really too busy with XY or Z, Bad date for you, etc. There might be some hard feelings, though. You just have to decide what's more important to you.

Good luck.

My dd was born early. But we had already made the choice to have the shower after bc I was on bed rest and just miserable. My dd was born in May and I had my shower (meet the baby shower) in Aug. It was wonderful bc it was mostly friends and family I didnt even know yet and i could let the baby get all the attention while I sat in a corner and took pictures. I wanted a traditional shower (with silly games and all my girlfriends) but we just moved and I am now 400 miles away from them all. My MIL lives in the town we moved to and she had the shower for me. So it was uncomfortable but would have been so much worse with out dd beign there to get all the attention. But if i were to ever have another shower I would wait again. It's great to get gifts for baby when he/she is bigger too. I know you said your friend doesnt want gifts. But Im sure in this economy later she will appriciate the things. Too bad you couldnt do like a girls night out or something. Sorry for the ramble..not sure if I even helped.

Change it to a "sip-n-see" where everyone can meet the new baby!

Ask the mom if it is okay to do it with *no gift.* Since people will feel obligated to bring something, do a charity gift: find a women's shelter or crisis pregnancy resource center, and find out what they need. There is one around here that is usually in need of diapers. Have the information of the shelter you are working with in the invitation, as well as what the needs are (preemie, newborn, and size one diapers are usually in need around here). Everyone will feel like thay are contributing and the charity will be so pleased and thankful!

If you don't want to host or attend, wait for the invitation and let the host(ess) know you cannot attend. No explanation necessary.

PS You might be the only one that remembers or cares that you didn't bring a second gift. Whoever keeps score is petty, anyway!! Babies need love and care, not STUFF!!

If you don't want to do something, then just decline.
I personally see nothing at all wrong with having a celebration after the baby is born and things have settled down a bit. It's not meant to be a "traditional" shower at that point.
Also, once you've already given gifts, the person the event is held for usually doesn't expect more gifts. It's more about the gathering.
If you don't want to be involved, then you don't have to be. Things happen and time goes by. Hosting a gathering with tea and cake after a baby is born is not that weird to me. That's just my opinion having friends with premies where things didn't happened as planned.

It's up to you.

Why not have a "come meet the new little one" get together...no mention of a shower...say something like
Suzy came a little early , so we couldnt celebrate until now.
Please come and spend a little time getting to know her...

Add "no gifts" at the bottom of the invitation..if they bring something...that is up to them.

I think that you should ask the mom. She can let you know what she wants and what she dosent want. Can be something small where people come to meet the baby.
My mom once attended a baby shower where the baby was around three months and the new mommy was so excited because she revived gifts that she needed like diapers, wipes, baby food, formula, and things for the new mommy like gift cards to a restaurant or to a local grocery store and to a place to get pampered. Saved the family many many dollars. Oh and other people opted to pick a day or two of the week and bring a dinner dish, fresh or frozen in order to help out the mom, since things can always get so hectic and dinner isn't even started. Hope this helps.