Baby Sleep Pattern Changing.. for the Worse :(

I've noticed that the tireder they are (or I am, for that matter!) the harder it is for them to go to sleep.

Hi B.
I have 2 sons (one is 10 months, the other is 2+) and I had major sleep problems with my eldest. The book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" was the best sleep book I read (and I read many!!) I am still reading "Healthy Sleep" today and I recommend it to every new parent I meet. I am also a fan of "The Baby Whisperer". I found these to be much more helpful than the "No Cry" book.

I would not wake your baby in the morning - he is probably sleeping late because he isn't getting enough sleep during the day/night (or he might just be a late sleeper).

What you might want to try in the middle of the night is soothing him without a bottle by stroking him, giving him a pacifier, or, you can let him cry for a little while and see if he falls back asleep. It's good to pick a method and then stick with it. (I am not sure how old your son is now, but it's pretty normal for them to wake for a night feeding until about 9 months or so.) Then, he will hopefully stop waking in the middle of the night and wake naturally around 6/7am, You can then give him a bottle, and he might want to fall back asleep for a little nap before starting his day - which is a nice break for the parents in the morning!

It also sounds like you are now putting him to bed too late at night - babies should really be sleeping by 7pm - some even 6pm - or they get overtired and then it's a real challenge to get them down.

Lastly - make sure you get him on a good nap schedule - write down what times he seems to get sleepy/falls asleep during the day and help him out by putting him down at the same time every day. Don't go to him the minute you hear him - give him a few minutes as he just might go back to dreamland on his own.

Good Luck!

B.,

I would try to put him down earlier! I know with my 1yo daughter- if she is not in bed (meaning routine already done) by 7-7:15, we are almost guaranteed that it will take over an hour to get her down. i f we are on the earlier sched- she goes down with no problem and sleep til 6:30 7 the next morning (has since she was 6 mos). The problem with the later bedtime is that he may be getting over tired- especially if he is not getting his full naps in. we dropped the 5 pm due to the earlier bedtime.....

M.

I have an eight month old who has, fortunately, always been great about going to sleep. This was especially nice when she was having major reflux issues that kept waking her up!

A few suggestions:

I love the "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" book by Weissbluth.

I would try an earlier bedtime if I were you. My daughter's bedtime is 6:30. She generally wakes to nurse somewhere between 10:30 and 1, and then again between 4:30 and 6. If it's been less than four hours I don't go to her when she cries. That did mean a few nights of a very unhappy baby, but in the long run it's meant that she can get herself back to sleep most of the time. She has partial awakenings between bedtime and the first feeding, but these are usually just one or two squawks on the monitor and then nothing. If I went to her for these I'd be messing up her sleep bigtime!

I also installed a red light bulb in a lamp in her room. From when we start her night time routine until it's time for her to wake up fully the next morning I only use the red light. This helps emphasize to her that it's night time and she should be sleeping. It's also much easier on our eyes. Even though she still nurses at least once and usually twice, she generally settles right back down after I feed and change her. I do not talk to her or interact with her, other than cuddling while nursing and then changing her - minimal smiling, no talking, keeping my face neutral. I believe this has also helped to make it clear to her that night time is for sleeping. She does wake up all the way and some of her most entertaining babbles have been in the wee hours of the night, but I do my best to minimize my response to them so that she doesn't get the idea that I'm there to play with her then. It seems to work since she has almost always settled right back down to sleep after feeding/changing.

Sometimes she used to wake between six and seven AM but I would not go to her since she'd nursed within four hours. She would generally babble happily to herself in her crib until we went to her at seven. Now that she's sleeping for longer times, if she wakes before seven I'll go to her and nurse her and then put her back into her crib. She is continuing to happily hang out awake and chatter to herself in her crib, and actually usually drifts off to sleep again at some point and then wakes up again after eight or so. For a while I was worried about her not being able to have a morning nap if she slept that late, but just shifting it a bit later (to around nine thirty or ten) has worked well.

Good luck!

H

My baby was up at 7am, fed, 1st nap: back down at 8:30 sleeps till 9:30 or 10.00. Wakes and eats again, back down for 2nd nap: at 11:30 and sleeps to 1pm. eats again, then back down for 3rd nap: at 2:30-sleeps to 3:30. Up to eat again. 4th nap down at 5pm and sleeps to 6pm. She take another small bottle when waking. Then a bath and another bottle before bed between 7:30 - 9pm. My baby slept through the night typically. She also had some solids on two to three of her feedings.

I have realized recently with my baby that she is now teething her molars and that seems to be much harder on her than the front teeth. This makes sense its closer to the ears and much bigger teeth. Maybe he's getting molars and is really in a lot of pain? Well you will definitely know because they usually show signs of congestion or something.

I haven't read any books per say but i've read peoples advice online and I let my daughter dictate her own schedule. She is pretty consistent. I feed her every night at 7, bath at 8 and by then she plays for a few minutes and is READY for bed. She sleeps through the night but wakes at different times every morning anywhere between 5:30-7:30...generally 90% of the time it's 6:30am. Funny she gets up earlier on weekends as if she KNOWS mommy is going to stick around to play with her and not rush her out the door. Maybe just take a day to see what his natural rythms are? I definitely have her on a nightly schedule though that signals to her its time to go to bed. I dim the lights, turn the volumn down if dad is watching TV and hold her while giving her the nightly bottle...otherwise she holds it herself while she eats. Every once in a while she MAY wake up in the middle of the night but i'll give her a bottle and she's back down within 30 mins flat. She is pretty easy I think? I do let her cry it out during the day for her naps though, never did i at night but she always went right down because I walked and rocked her..it was bonding time for us since i work full time.

NOt sure any of this helps but the moral of this long post is to say, "Maybe your son has a different idea of a schedule and maybe check out what that is?"

For my son sleep induces sleep. If I am able to let him sleep until he wakes up on his own in the AM and nap time it is always easier to get him down at night. I also tried to regulate his schedule and he was laying in bed for almost two hours before he would fall asleep. I gave up and that's when I realized he slept better when he was able to sleep until his body told him to wake i
up. Good luck. Every child is different.

B.,
I totally understand where you are coming from. I am on my 3rd and they all start not sleeping well when they teethe and then when all the teeth come in it takes a little while for them to get back to sleeping well. I was lucky with my boys they got their teeth early and fast. My third is 10 1/2 months right now and just cut her third tooth 3 days ago, so I have a long way to go with her. She used to be the best sleeper of the 3 and now she is the worst of the 3. Last night she woke up just about every hour (I think she is getting multiple teeth at once).

I don't believe in Cry it out, I believe they were given the cry to communicate with you that something is wrong and of course they are going to wake up crying more during the teething time period because it hurts, they don't understand why, and they want you to comfort them. That is my view but everyone must do what is right for them.

At night I don't feed her everytime she gets up only if she acts hungry and I try to put her in her crib when she falls back asleep but sometimes I end up falling asleep on the couch while I am nursing/or holding her. I have noticed that sometimes they need to be more upright to be comfortable to help with the pressure from the teeth coming in. Good luck it does get better eventually but it does take a few months.

My boys are now 3 and 5 and they go to sleep by 7:30 and wake up at 7:30 and have been doing that for a while, in fact when I got pregnant with my 3rd this was the exact, and only, thing that I was dreading because we had just been getting such good sleep.
Hang in there,
C.

Oh dear. I guess it would have been better to leave it as it was. He could be teething in which case Hylands teething tablets are great for the mild times then Infant Tylenol when it gets closer to cutting through. That helped my baby. Also, is your wife breast feeding? I would go back to your original plan of putting him down later s he will last longer and one last feed a little before bedtime.

Greetings B.: I was surprized because I have just had this conversation with my own son about his little one. So as the motherof 5, grandmother of several and having had foster care and day care over the years I will share what I told him.
Your little one has within itself its own time need clock.
Just as with teens that seem off the scale so will a baby as its life needs change. If the child was content before you started makeing all the drastic changes at once; you have set off a explosion that the child being a child doesn't understand. Kind of like when they get their days and nights mixed up because you change things for them once again.
What I have found works for us - and I say that loosely because the Grandchildren will prove me wrong everytime!! We have a basic routine with those under 4yo. that starts at about 4 months( til then I am so excited all I wanted to do was it and watch my baby)--- TV off an hour before we start, and music goes on as a signal that change is happening-- make it jazz, classic whatever is soothing to everyone. We do bath time (for the girls we call it mermaid time), and have fun and don't rush it. then when it is bedtime we read and rock. I don't do more than 3 children's stories after age 2 becasue I tend to act out the story or change in my voice the characters-- so I will read what ever I am reading Victoria Holt, Scriptures, school books. The point being I am sitting in the room and reading while they still need to see me and the voice is what counts. I have been know to read over a baby monitor as I had more than one child to talke care of or one sick in another room.
This does take alot of time but you didn't really expect anything worthwhile to come right now and be any diferent. Change takes time. Please know that children are very reslient and they manage to get the sleep needed .A power nap for the baby could out do lighting up PG&E electric for CAlif.
The only other thing I can say is pick up the baby, hold him close to your heart and know that this stage will end in time, or just pat him on the back andtell him you love him til he settles down. My son put a music system in so that his little onehears soft music and keeps a fan going for light noise becasue they found their little one just doesn't like being alone. WHEN in doubt just put the baby in bed with you-- no one may sleep- but the baby, but the sweet sounds make it worth it. Good Luck, Nana G

Hi B.,

I received three pieces of advice that I found indispensable during the lack-of-sleep years:

1. Never wake a sleeping baby.
2. Remember that this is the hardest part, when they don't sleep through the night.
3. Always park next to the shopping cart return.

If your old pattern worked, go back to that. Also, speak with your pediatrician. By six months, mine were not fed at night anymore, even if they woke up. Unless he needs to go to daycare, don't wake him in the morning. Sleep in for all the rest of us who can't!

My daughter was not a napper. She'd nap twenty minutes here and there. My son was a great napper and an early riser. This spring he finally began to sleep until 6am.

Finally, my kids are four and six. It is only in this past year that my husband and I are getting enough sleep and it's amazing how much better we feel!

Hang in there - this is the hardest part!

Hi B.,

Statistics say 1 out of 3 children have sleep deprevation.

Most of us do not get to the 5 stages of REM and stay there long enough.

That is when the immune system rebuilds itself.

There is going to be a Children's Wellness Expo on Sept
12th in Alameda with a panel of medical doctors educating natural solutions to help with the challenges we are faced with today's toxic environment.

Sleep will be one of the tophics.

If this is something that interest you let me know and I will send you more info.

Have a great day.

N. Marie

B., I would speak with your pediatrician. If your infant is bigge than 12-14 opounds in weight, he no longer needs any night time feeds. His stomach is large enough to accomodate all of the milk requirements in the daytime schedule. He will adjust to eating more at each feeding and sleep throught the night. Solids are mostly carbohydrates and do not increase the night time sleeping as most parents claim. Carbohydrates are digested more quickly than protien, ie milk.
best wishes to a solution.

6 month old babies should be getting about 15-16 hours of sleep per night. He is probably over tired, which is why it is hard to get him to go to sleep. The only method that really works if you want sleep is the Cry it Out method. A lot of people think it is cruel, but if you do a modified method it will work in a few days. I have a 5 month old that sleeps from 7:30-6:30 since she was 5 weeks old (no night feeding) and takes a 9:OO, 1:00 and 5:00 nap (we just recently got this schedule down). Is he nursing or formula fed? Unless he is underweight he shouldn't need to eat at all at night. Some babies just eat to soothe themselves back to sleep. The only way to get your baby to sleep all night and not wake you up is to teach him to self soothe.