Bedtime Gating in Room

We used a gate when my son was about that age. We had moved him into a toddler bed and I was worried that he would get up and wander at night. I usually put the gate up when we were going to bed. I thought it worked fine though we had to learn to go without it once potty training started!

I learned early on not to close the bedroom door on my children for a variety of reasons. The biggest one being they feel shut off from everyone, with the door open they feel they are still part of the family and can hear the comforting noises and sounds letting them know they aren't alone.
Yes, I did use gates for the stairwells.
I have a friend who used a gate for the bedrooms and it worked well until the children learned to climb over it and then to open it on their own.
I would go with the gate idea.

One of my friends had an awesome idea that has worked wonders with her 2 boys. She bought old cheap doors and her husband cut them in half. He put a finished edge where he had cut. Then they could have the boys in their rooms at night but still hear them down the hall. The doors were cut higher than a gate would be to keep the boys in. A little safer solution. We are going to be doing the same thing when we get our bedrooms remodeled.

Good Luck!!

Hello K.. My youngest will be 2 in FOURTEEN DAYS and she recently moved into a twin size bed with a bed gate thing on the side. For me, I can't always get her to sleep for nap time, when I can't get her to sleep, I just let her nap in my bed, but I don't suggest that. However, at night time she sleeps in her own bed and if she wakes up during the night, she comes down stairs and crawls in bed with my hubby and me. I don't have a door gate, because I didn't have the money for one when she moved into her bed. At nap time I shut the door completly, but at night time I don't latch the door so she can get out. When I put her to bed I do the Nanny 911 thing, she gets up, I walk her back. Sometimes it might take close to an hour to get her to sleep, other nights a matter of min. She has a 'fishy light' that I turn on, and one of those Frogs that plays music for 6 min that I turn on and that is that. I must have my sleep too ya know. It will take awhile to get your little one use to the new routine, I have only been doing it for a few weeks and you just have to stick with the plan and be consistant. I agree that he will scream and such for awhile because he doesn't want to sleep by himslem...but eventually you will have to go through this. Either when he is two or when he is in school and it will be easier when he is younger vrs older. Best of luck and just be consistant focusing on the end goal to pull you through on those long nights.

I have a 23 month old boy and he is in a regular bed. I do put a gate up to ensure he stays in his room at night. I only use the gate at night. My bedroom is within a step of his and I can easily see if he gets up. The gate ensures he does not get out and hurt himself by going into the kitchen, down the stairs etc.

I usually lay with him in his bed with his favorite book. I also buy him fun sheets for his bed. Whenever possible, play in his room, let him sit on his bed and take "ownership" of his pillow and bed.

Ever since I put him in a regular bed, he actually sleeps longer. Just keep working on it...good luck!

I did this with my children and it was very helpful. If you think about it, how different is it for him to be in a crib than in a child proofed room with a gate on the door. It's a little bit bigger space, but he's "contained" either way. I felt better knowing that my children weren't sneaking around the house, especially if there were to be a fire - I'd prefer to know where to find them then for them to be hiding under the couch in the living room or something. And remember, part of being a good mom is taking care of yourself.

The gate works alot better, I think, than the door knob covers that are supposed to prevent the child from escaping. My kids were always better at operating those than I ever was/ am. The only thing that I have done, and do we are back to this since we have let one more out of the crib :). I make sure everything is very toddler proof and we clean the room before bedtime. But once the door is closed they know they don't get out or up to play until the next am. All 4 of my girls used to sleep in the same bed with us, our last one stopped a few weeks ago because we had #5, but it has been nice to have the bed with no little ones in it! The little sleep I do get is MUCH more sound than before! I forgot what I had been missing out on!
Goodluck and know that you will be doing yourself and son a big favor by putting a gate up and letting him sleep in his bed at night!

Yes, we started gating the room as soon as the first one was out of the crib. We couldn't sleep at night without the piece of mind that they were safe in their room. What if they got up in the middle of the night and wandered over to the stairs, or played in the bathroom, or came in our room and played with stuff we thought was safe from toddler hands, or many other senerios... It taught them that bedtime was for sleeping, not socializing, or playing, or exploring. If they had a problem in the middle of the night, we could hear them - anything that breaks the silence in the middle of the night sounds 10x lounder, but for our first few, we also used baby monitors to keep right next to the bed just too be sure! There will be an adjustment period if you haven't used this from the start, but as with anything with kids, they get used to it and learn new routines easier than we give them credit for - - you just have to be consistant. Good luck!

Hi K.,

Since his night waking has gone on for a long time, do you think there could be a medical reason? The reason I'm asking is my 16 month old son kept night waking for months every 2-3 hours long after he should be capable of sleeping through the night. I felt like something was hurting him somewhere and asked the doctor to refer us to a specialist. Sure enough, his ears weren't draining properly and he had tubes put in. After that, he sleeps great and so do we. My brother had a similar problem going on for 2 years also with his son.
Good luck! I hope you can all get more sleep - I know I"m a huge crab/disfunctional when I don't get enough rest.

I also put up a baby gate in front of my 2yr old daughter's door at night. I works nicely because I don't like having her door closed all the way (& she doesn't either) but I know that she can't get into anything is she should wake up early & get out of her bed. It allows me to get the sleep that I need so I can be the best mom possible for her.
Good Luck with everything! It will take a little adjustment time but I'm sure it will work out

Hi K.

I believe I have written you before, I don't know if you remember, but I also agree with the gating, I did that with my children as well. I believe that it is best for children to sleep in their own beds, and is necessary for you to get proper sleep. If your son learns how to climb the gates, I have some other suggestions for you.

The best of luck!

When we moved to our new house, my daughter had the worst time sleeping. She's still in a crib, but the unfamiliarity kinda freaked her out. So, I spent one whole afternoo playing with her in her room. It seemed to reorient her. She knew that that was her room now. I don't think a gate at the door is a bad idea at all. You can still see in, and he can still see out. As long as he doesn't know how to operate the gate, you should be fine. But, be prepared for a few really long nights. It may take him awhile to break the habit of sleeping with mommy. And, if you try it and it doesn't work, there's nothing wrong with co-sleeping.

I gate my 20 months old in at bed time and nap time. I've found that they can scream loud enough to wake you if they need too. Also, I love that book! I'm still working on potty training his way, but hopefully it will work.

we had to cut my sons door in half like a barn door. and put the lock on the outside. (because he could climb over the gate) but i love it we do it for nap and night time. and the door helped me because you can add an alarm on the door in case he gets out to ease your nerves.

I have used gates at night time to keep my daughter in her room. I usually have to use 2 gates because she knows how to take them down but I take one of them down after she goes to sleep and I go to bed. It's worked well for me. I don't like the thought of her being trapped in there while I'm asleep so I make sure I take 1 if not both down before I go to bed. Good luck!

It's ok to admit that you sleep better knowing he is next to you. I would just sleep with him and enjoy the security of knowing he's safe. I would worry about a fire or him being hurt in there all by himself. Some of these books seem to make a lot of sense, but when you stop and listen to your intuition, they go against it. Listen to your mother's heart!

I use to do that with my older two children....It was rough at first but once they got use to it it did work.....I haven't had to do that with my youngest yet but I know I eventually will have to....It does work and it does take an adjustment for the child but it will help both of you get better sleep and it will give you a bit of time to yourself....

I did it nap and bedtime...I had to at bedtime because my kids were sleep walkers and I was afraid of them hurting themselves getting out of bed and not knowing what they were doing....

I would honestly recomend the idea because I know how hard it is to keep some sanity in your life...and when your wipped out it's even harder.

Hey - I'm 42, and have a 4 year old and a 20 month old, and am right there with ya!

We had our oldest sleeping with us until recently because when she was 7 months old she had a fibral seizure (her temperature spiked causing a seizure). I had a hard time putting her in her own room for a long time, and then we had #2. Recently (within the last month), we finally put them in their own "special" room. The oldest sleeps in her bed and the youngest sleeps in a crib. They've done remarkably well. It's taken the younger a bit longer to get used to it, but we're still doing pretty well.

We don't gate the room because we figure the 4 year old is old enough to not fall down the stairs, and can perhaps let us know if the younger one wakes up and/or come get us when/if she needs help.

We only really use the gate on rare occasions anymore...when she starts sleeping in a big girl bed, we'll probably use it at the top of the stairs. But the last time we really used the gate was to keep Megan out of the mudroom while the furnace repair guy was there.

I'd say whether or not to use the gate depends on how Nolan takes to being in his own bedroom for naps and/or bedtime.

One very important thing for us, particularly in getting our girls in their own beds without any hassle was having a consistant bedtime routine. Both of my girls can get "out of sorts" if the routine changes at all. Once we were finally ready to move them into the room, we gave them "advanced warning" (like on Thursday morning) that they'd be sleeping in their SPECIAL ROOM (on Friday night). BUT the routine was still the same. Went like a charm.

Good luck!

Welcome to MOTHERHOOD where from now on you'll get NO SLEEP until he's out on his own!

I never had problems with my girls and not staying in their rooms for bedtime so I'm not quite sure how to help.

He's waking you up crying because you've got him used to sleeping with you in your bed. Now you're wanting to change his routine and have him sleep by himself. I'm sure it's just a "comfort" thing for him. Put some music on and give him a few toys to play with, maybe he will fall asleep on his own, in his own room.

Good Luck! Oh, and i was serious about not getting ANY sleep until he's out on his own. My girls are 17 and 13 and I STILL don't get ne sleep!

We put a gate on our daughter's room at nap time and bed time as soon as we put her in a big girl bed. It worked great. We left the door open and had a baby monitor in our room/downstairs. She was not "cut off" from the rest of us with the door open as she could see and hear outside of her room. The baby monitor was there to let us know if she needed us. She is now almost four, and we no longer use the gate. She knows she is to stay in her room at bed time, and she does.

I think the tougher issue for you will be getting your son to sleep in his bed since he is used to sleeping with you. I can't help here since my kids always slept in their rooms, but I bet some of the other moms on here have some good advice. I do know that our pediatrician recommended the Ferber book (Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems) for sleep training when our oldest went through a rough spot regarding sleeping when she turned two. Good luck!

K.,

When my son was a toddler, he would scream at naptime and keep climbing out. I didn't want to shut the door and not be able to see him, so I gated the door way. He would play and then fall asleep peacefully on the floor. I'd then go in and cover him up with a blanket and let him sleep on the floor. It made life a lot more enjoyable for everyone, and it was only a short-lived phase for a few months, so it didn't ruin him for life for sleeping in a bed. If I remember correctly, we transitioned to a regular bed after that. If you already have a regular bed, you might find that eventually he will climb back into bed by himself to sleep. But don't worry if it takes several months or even a year. And if he prefers the floor, make up a cozy spot with blankets and pillow and see if he goes there to sleep. Expect that he will probably just fall asleep in his tracks at first.

Just make sure the room is safe and after a few days you will know what he does and if you can sleep in a nearby room without constant supervision. Good luck!

I am sure that most people won't agree with the way that I do things, but this is what has worked best for me. When my son first goes to bed I shut his door, then when I know he is asleep(the monitor is on) I go upstairs and open his door. He will be 2 in Sept and has been in a big bed for several months. He would not stop climbing out of his crib. That made me concerned about putting a gate at his door. This way if he does wake up and need me in the middle of the night which he does on occassion he knows he can get to me. I close the bathroom door and there is a gate at the top of the strairs that he cannot climb. It is one of the extra tall ones with the slates that go up and down, it also has a slide button and needs to be lifted to open it.
He is fine with me shutting the door and most nights tells me to shut the door. It is the routine that he has gotten used to. I lay with him for a short amount of time and we read books before I shut the door and go downstairs. I hope this helps. You may have it a little harder if he is used to sleeping with you so maybe you might want to try to start a new special routine to help him adjust.
Good luck
A.

When I put my son in his big boy bed, I placed a doorknob lock on his side of the door and I use a baby monitor. That way he stays in his room until I go to get him out. As long as his room is a safe place for him, it should work out fine. Now my son just knocks on the door when he gets up. Hope this helps.