My 11 year old son has been invited to a sleepover bday party. The problem is - it is not at a home, but at a bouncey place (Pump It Up). There are 30 kids invited and they spend the night. The parents are only staying until 10pm, then they have a college student and a recent college grad staying with the kids overnight. I'm not overprotective - my son goes away to camp for two weeks every year, goes camping with scouts and has been on more sleepovers than I can count. I just don't like the idea of a wild night with no parent that I trust witih them. Am I being too overprotective? He's really not happy that I'm leaning towards no, but I can't help it. I told him I can pick him up at 10 when the parents leave. What would you do?
Thanks moms! The only two people staying are the grad and college student, both of whom I don't know. I started thinking of my nephews at that same age and although I love them dearly, can't imagine them having control over that many kids. In fact, they'd probably encourage a little wild running around. I'm going to let him stay until 11. Luckily, his best friends' mom also said no so they are going to sleepover at his house after the party. The mom of the birthday boy said they did it last year with no problems. Still sticking with my gut though. :)
didn't even read the other responses:
NOPE, I wouldn't let him spend the night with 2 complete strangers!
& I don't think you're being paranoid....
I would pick him up at 10 when the parents leave. He will probably not be the only kid who has to leave at that time.
No way I let him stay after all of the parents have left. What planet are these people from?
Is it ok to say, ahhhhh hell no!? lol Let him go and pick him up at 10. Whos to say those college kids wont taunt them or do anything else to them. I would NOT be ok with that and as the parent doing the inviting I would stay there to lend some reassurance. I can almost guarantee with that many kids invited there will be plenty that dont go or get picked up. Give him the choice, he can go and get picked up or not go at all.
No way. Too many kids and the recent college grad is the oldest supervising adult, someone who you probably don't know? What experience does he/she have with that many kids under his charge? What about worst case scenario, could he handle it? If I was a parent there I would take my child home at the 10pm hour or not go at all. This just sounds crazy.
I don't think you're being overprotective. There are just too many red flags in this situation, that a good parent should not ignore. Who are these are adults? Friends of the bday boy's family? Employees? Why aren't the parent(s) staying overnight?
IMO if the parents are staying until 10:00, then your child can stay until 10:00.
the same thing. i have worked with young people who do all sorts of stupid things in the name of fun. i would never allow my child to stay unless a parent i know was there. even the high school kids who stayed all night had adult chaperones.
If you are really against it, you need to go with that.....I understand your point completely.
Here's a thought though, if you want to let him go and worry less: Why not ask the bounce place for their employees' references or qualifications as well as if the employees have all had a background checks? This may ease your mind. You might also want to talk with the employees while you are there and get a feel for how capable they will be in caring for all of the children and providing a safe/fun environment. If you feel cautious after all of this, go with your gut and keep him home overnight.
He'll be a bit upset with you, but he'll get over it......Trust me....I had a VERY overprotective mother who didn't allow me to go to the mall for the 14th birthday of a friend because no parents would be there.....My friend's mom ended up staying in the mall with us just so I could go, which was so "uncool", lol.....It was a huge deal at the time and I was so mad at my mom....I got over it pretty quick once I realized she was only doing what she felt was safe for me. She's one of my best friends and I think she is an AWESOME mother. I have a lot of respect for her and how she cared for my sister and I.....my point is, life will go on for you both and he'll eventually understand should you choose to keep him home.
Take care!
Twice a year the local gym has Twilight Tumble and kids from Kindergarten age and up go and spend the night. They have to be there by 7 and then the doors are locked. We pick the kids up by 9am the next morning. I trust the people who the kids will be with. They are both high school students, college students, and the owner. The kids do gymnastics for a while then have several different TV's where they can watch age appropriate movies. They do more gymnastics and tumbling later and then again in the morning. I trust the people who are holding the sleep over. If you trust the people there should be no question if they are safe or not. If you don't know them surely you can call the better business in your area and find out if there are any complaints or ask other parents.
If I knew the business and people then I would have no problem at all.
I definitely wouldn't let my children stay over night with the situation you described. Even if I trusted and knew the two older kids watching them, there are so many things that could go wrong with this scenario. Frankly, I'm surprised that Pump it Up allows overnighters with the potential liabilities involved.
I'd say, go to the party, but you're coming home at ten.
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30 11 year olds with only 2 adults? i wouldnt care if the parents left but to only have 2 adults would bother me i would say no esp if their will be boys and girls there
I would tell the parent how I feel and encourage other parents to speak up if they agree and maybe the parents will change their mind and stay
Follow your instinct. You're doing the right thing. He can stay until the parents take their leave. This party is a very STRANGE concept. Do those parents actually expect that anyone in their right mind would leave their children with complete strangers?!? Really? You are not being overprotective at all. It's common sense. Anyone that tells you otherwise doesn't put their child's safety first.
All you have to tell the parents of the birthday child is that you don't feel comfortable leaving him overnight with people you don't know. Hopefully, they will understand.
I think that atleast one parent should be there. I wouldn't leave my kids like that either. Talk with the other parents. Maybe someone will volunteer if not maybe you should so that you child can be involved and not be left out. Just a thought.
Does the bouncy place not have adults/managers there also? I mean, they have a liability I'm sure, with a whole bunch of tweens staying the night there. I would bet that there's another adult or two there to monitor the boys.
I only have a toddler, so don't know what I'd do. I'd probably call another mom of one of the boys and see what she thinks of it. Or call the mom hosting the party and voice your concerns and see what she has to say about it. She may decide that a couple of dads need to stay the night too.
I say, if youre not comfortable with it, dont let him do it. Doesnt matter what other parents are doing! You dont know the students who are watching them.
Isn't the bday child's parents staying overnight? I find it odd that no parents are staying. If it were me, I would pick him up at 10:00 when the parents leave and tell him that you want him to go but withouth parents, you just can't let him spend the night. UNLESS you are friends with many of the other parents and they seem to think it is ok and you trust them and their judgement. But in all honesty, there are enough things that go on without parental supervision that if you can avoid, you should. I would pick him up.
i agree, maybe you could modify it though. Have you thought about letting him stay till like 11 or 12? that way he could still feel cool? but definately dont let him stay all night...
No parent, no way. WAY too risky!
