Okay, perhaps I am being a little petty, but I would like to hear from other moms regarding invitations to birthday parties. In my street, there are about 4 families with children of various ages (1-6 y.o). When one of the children turned 4, every child in the neighborhood was invited but mine to the birthday party. I tried to take it in stride thinking that this was because my son is not in the same age group. This was last year when my son was under 2. When this same mom had a party last month for another one of her children who is only 6 months older than mine, she once again excluded my son. When we had a party for our son, we included invites to all of the neighbors.
The only reason this really gets to me is that we live across the street from this family. I of course have said nothing to this mom as I really don't want friction with my neighbor.
I realize that this is really minor in the whole grand scheme of things. However, I would like to hear form other moms about this situation. Am I getting my panties in a wad over nothing?
If this is something that is bothering you, it would be wise to talk to the mom and see what her reasoning is. At least you will know the truth and not have to wild thoughts running through your head why she would do this. If your not ready to approach her, just forgive her, and give her the benefit of the doubt, perhaps she forgot again?
I love Karen S's advice -- this way the child is recognized for their special day (which is the whole point, really), and you might get a hint from the mom-in-question why your child was excluded. Also, bringing a gift by could be an olive branch if there is any tension that she might be imagining. Sometimes this can happen with neighbors.
Good luck, and please keep us posted.
If I were in your situation, I think my panties would be bunching up a bit, too!
Being a pretty direct person by nature, I think in your situation I would have taken over a small gift a day or two after the party and said something like: "We saw that you guys were having a birthday party for . . . and just wanted to drop off a little present for him and say Happy Birthday."
What can your neighbor say, except "thank you"? She might get a little embarassed and may give you an explanation about why your child was excluded.
I'm curious. Did your neighbor come to your child's birthday party?
Do you have regular contact with this other family that didn't invite your son to either party? Do their kids and your son play together at all? If they don't, it's quite possible that this mom did not think to invite your son because you don't really know each other and little kids can have a stressful time having someone unfamilar at their party.
When you invited the children of this neighbor to your son's party, did they come? If they did then I'd say you have a reason to be slightly miffed that your son was excluded from theirs, however, if they didn't, I wouldn't worry about any of this at all. Even though your children are similar in ages, you can't force friendships (especially among aquaintences, if this is the case here) among children (and their parents) just because you live on the same street.
If you'd like to make friends with this neighbor, bring over a coffee cake and ask if you two can talk while your son and her kids have some playtime together. Or invite her over to your place for cake, conversation and playtime. If she's not interested, don't fret, she may just be too busy, too stressed or, to be blunt, someone you may be wasting your time on getting to know.
If your kids have played together before and do play together now, but your son was still excluded, be direct and let that mom know that you're disappointed that your son was excluded and were wondering if there was a specific reason why he was left out. Depending on her response you can take it from there.
D. L.
I would probably feel a little hurt as well but what can you do except go on and be the better neighbor & keep the peace. Don't let it ruin your day!!!!
Take care.
Well you sound like you're pretty busy. I don't maybe you don't have regular contact with her and she doesn't know you that well.
Who knows what it is. Did she go to your party when you invited them and all the other neighbors? There could be several reason why your son is not included. They probably don't know you that well or not on a regular basis. Who knows.
