Birthday Party Invite with a Wish List

Updated on August 18, 2010
E.B. asks from Miami, FL
26 answers

Do you find it kacky to include a wish list for a kids birthday party? Not something i have done but what i have received. Although i see the persons point of view but do people really do this a lot?

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R.D.

answers from Washington DC on

I do not think it is tacky. It gives the person attending the party at least an IDEA of what the kid likes. So the kid gets what they want. Yes, you can always exchange it, but then that is more work on the parents part and the kid doesn't get toys he/she loves at the party. Depends on who you are inviting too. My good friend does it every year, but only her good friends get the wish list. I would never send an invite to school that way. You can always do a themed party too...like baking, trucks, make-up, dolls, arts and crafts, sports, Wii, etc...so people know what things the kid likes at least.

3 moms found this helpful
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K.H.

answers from Washington DC on

I have never had a "wish list" in any invite my kids have recieved , and I think it is rude to do so. When my kids have had invitations I have asked the parents if there is anything in particular that the child likes , for example if they are crazy about anything spiderman. But no I don't think it is right to include a wish list.

3 moms found this helpful
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B.A.

answers from Tampa on

Yes, very tacky. I do, however, keep one handy for friends and family that request one (like my grandma who only sees the kids once a year).

1 mom found this helpful

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T.F.

answers from Dallas on

I personally find it offensive and extremely tacky.

If I received something like that, I would decline to attend. In reality, that would not be an invitation...I would consider it an invoice.

5 moms found this helpful

D.K.

answers from Sioux City on

I find this offensive I hope this isn't what people do. It's rude! You don't invite people to come to a party to get the gift. You invite them so that you can enjoy their company on a special day. I would prefer no gifts from people on my kid's birthdays. People are more important than things.

2 moms found this helpful
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K.

answers from Tampa on

I dont think its tacky - I think its helpful. What is the difference between asking someone what they want and looking at a registry. Personally I have never done it - but certainly have seen it done and found it helpful. But thats just my opinion.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

very very tacky. the only time you should even consider giving gift ideas is if someone calls and asks what to get. then you should just give the ideas of things he likes "my son loves ninja turtles or my son is just starting to read so magic tree house books are good" things like that .

1 mom found this helpful
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J.C.

answers from Anchorage on

Very tacky! What was that person thinking? If your child does not like a gift it can always be exchanged.

1 mom found this helpful
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J.M.

answers from Boston on

No, I don't like it. I keep a mental list of general categories of things my kids might like (art stuff, trucks, dress up clothes, etc) so if people ASK I can give them an idea. I do understand the impulse, and I don't think people mean to be rude, but it's always in poor taste to include any kind of gift information on an invitation, unless it's "No Gifts, Please."

1 mom found this helpful
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M.P.

answers from Sarasota on

Personally, I would not do one but I don't think its tacky. When i do a bday party i get tons of emails/text/calls with questions on what my daughter or son would like- and if i say "whatever you want" people get upset so its not too bad of an idea. I dont think the host is forcing a gift on a person but i personally dont go to a birthday party/shower/wedding without a gift- now THAT's tacky!

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T.B.

answers from Miami on

Very tacky indeed. I would disregard it or not attend at all.

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J.D.

answers from New York on

While i've never done it, I do not find it tacky. Let's face it, people are going to ask and mom is going to have to come up with answers. It can be a time saver for everyone! People don't have to use it, its just suggestions....

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I have not received a wish list with any of the invitations my son has received. And if I did, I would think it was very RUDE!

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T.F.

answers from Miami on

That's kind of a tough one because I do think that on one hand it's tacky to do that. However, on the other hand, it pretty much is a given that a present will be bought for a kids birthday party and it could be nice to know what the birthday boy or girl likes. If we get invited to a kids birthday and I don't feel I know them well enough to know what to buy, I'll usually ask the mom for gift ideas. Perhaps this mom was trying to avoid the barage of phone calls asking what to get...so, it's kind of a good idea, but a little tacky at the same time...

Perhaps a better way of doing it, rather than a wish list is to just say something like "Johnny is very much into Thomas the Train and all things automobiles and transportation right now." That wouldn't be tacky and could avoid the calls to the mom asking what to get. Hmmm...I just might do that for my daughter's upcoming birthday party!

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H.C.

answers from Orlando on

I received an invite with a general list of gift ideas (clothing size, etc.), and I was totally put off by it. To me, it's assuming that a gift will be given & saying, "Instead of you buying me something you put thought into, buy me THIS." Now, if I RSVP & ASK for gift ideas, that's one thing. But it's totally tacky to receive them in advance, on any type of invite, whether it's birthday, wedding, shower, etc.

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T.O.

answers from Jacksonville on

I did a wish list for my family both in state and out and got raves. Its hard to buy stuff for kids and a wish list was great for them to get ideas. It also made it less likely to have duplicates. Even though i may know some of my girls friends, i still need ideas. Sometimes also, if there is a big item on the list, guest will give gift cards to help buy it.

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R.L.

answers from Tampa on

This is the first time I have ever heard of it, but What a Great Idea!
This way there is no going to the store and wondering what to buy...I will be doing that the next time I plan a birthday party for one of my girls.

K.C.

answers from Orlando on

I know a lot of people that have done "wish lists" they look just like baby registries. This I think is a little tacky. Something a good friend of mine did, that I thought was a good idea, on the back of the invite they had a little sticker that said "Child loves Elmo and baby dolls, she is currently wearing 2T top and bottoms."

I thought it was a great idea, especially since it was a good friend from work and our children didn't know each other well at the time. I really had no idea what to get her so this made it much easier.

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A.F.

answers from Burlington on

I agree with Dana. It's not about the presents. I wish more people would realize that. It's the people in your life, not the stuff, that's important.

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K.B.

answers from Jacksonville on

Actually, it can get very tiring telling your whole list of guests what the birthday boy would like. I get overwhelmed with people asking me!

I love it when there is an idea list of what to bring so that i do not feel rude asking, and I am not overwhelming the parent with "what would he/she like?"

It's a birthday party--and yes, presents for the child is the proper thing to do...If you are bringing a gift anyways, why not already have an idea of what that child would like?

J.G.

answers from San Antonio on

I've never seen it done, but sounds very tacky. I guess I can see a mom wanting to not get a whole bunch more junk toys for her kids, so wanting to let people know what the kid actually wants/needs. But like others said, she should wait till someone calls to RSVP and tell them only if they ask. Let the kiddo write grandma or grandpa a letter requesting something they want - not friends or other invitees to a party.

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D.W.

answers from Gainesville on

People might do it a lot but it's extremely rude and tacky. While it is a given that one would be polite and bring a gift if they attend a birthday party, it is rude on the part of host to ask for specific gifts. What the birthday boy or girl might like could be discussed if the invitee calls and asks. A polite host never, ever asks for specific gifts in the invite.

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B.P.

answers from New York on

I recently got an invite with a "wishlist". As long as its viewed as a way to make suggestions and in no way seen as obligitory I think its ok. I personally would not write it on the invite but rather mention it when people ask what my child would like. But I don't think its a huge deal. I think its much more tacky to register again for a second shower when you have a children close in age and put that on the invitation.

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S.S.

answers from Daytona Beach on

I wish more people would do this!!! It's hard enough to think of something to buy my kids for an occasion, let alone some child I don't know!!! Some people might find it offensive, but I think it's great.

C.R.

answers from Dallas on

I've never received one though our circle of friends is very small. I think it's yucky. Might help breed the "entitlement" issues that seems to be the growing trend among children.
C.

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D.B.

answers from Tampa on

Very tacky, IMHO. Invitations should be just that & by including a list, you are asking for presents. I understand that presents will be given, of course, but you should provide suggestions only when asked. Same thing with any invitation, you do not ask for present, you ask for them to celebrate with you.

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