Birthing Styles

My thoughts on birthing plans is they are nice to have, but be prepared for it to change LOL!
I think when talking about "methods" or "styles" the are just guides for you to find some tecniques to incorporate into what will be your style. My midwives, when talking about a plan, told me to write out my perfect scenario and what needed to be done to help that happen, then look at each of those steps and think through "what if this didn't happen this way, how would I feel?"
It was a good exercise and when things did or didn't go according to plan, I didn't freak out (which I guarantee you had I not thought through this, I would have) and was able to enjoy the process and be in the moment.
that is my advice to you, too:)
Good luck!

I've given birth 5 times in 5 different ways. My favorite was the last time when I received my epidural right away and was able to sleep through the night while my body labored. I delivered my son at 7am after a good night's sleep. With the epidural I was still able to push my son out and feel when he was coming, but I didn't suffer the excruciating pain of contractions all night nor was I drowsy and "out of it" from Demerol.

You don't say how far along you are, but you should read more about some of the techniques to reduce the pain/discomfort of contractions, and plan to start practicing them, if you want to go without pain meds. It can be done, but planning and practice is necessary to achieve the goal. The Bradley method is one of those methods, but there are others. The help of a good doula (whichever way you go) can also be really, really helpful.

A birth plan is more about your thought-out wishes and desires for the birth. It's a guide. However, I think a lot of women get really hung up on the birth plan and want it to go exactly as they planned....but birth is not like that. It's an organic process and one you cannot predict 100%. So, educating yourself about your options for pain relief, both medical and non-medical, will give you a good idea what your true options are. Having a doula present can give access to some of the options (she can provide pressure to your back, massage, etc.) and she can help give you the space you need to make decisions without the docs/nurses pushing you into something you're not willing to do.

Whatever birth plan you come up with, you should definitely run it past the doc(s) who will be providing your care. Talk about various scenarios, and see if they really are willing to follow your desires. A lot of docs will say yes, and not really go over it, but when it comes down to it, a lot of them want to go the standard pitocin-to-induce-and/or-augment-labor-&-epidural route.

Good luck and safe birth to you.

Talk to your OB/GYN at your next visit about decisions you can make ahead of time.
And you know what they say about the best laid plans.....lol
My plan for Lamaze labor quickly translated into not being able to breathe with a horrible cold, having my water break at home with a coughing fit, my husband trying to get back from out of town and basically alternating writhing on the bed and walking laps around the hallway until I could receive an epidural.
All I'm saying is be prepared to be a bit flexible!
Congratulations!

Feel free to have your own style! Do you like hats? Me either...I think that they went out a long time ago.

Honestly, you don't need a plan and you could be setting yourself up for disapointment because how birth happens is not really within your control, no matter what anybody else has happen to them any more than they control any other body function. I planned on being 5' 10'. but my body did not do what I planned. You are not sick, you are going to go through an unpredictable process that may have no side road called "prefrence."

You don't know how you are going to feel in this labor, and if you really want an epidural you can change your mind and not feel guilty because someone else thinks that theirs is a better way, they did not get a medal for being able to stand it, and their expeirence was no better than yours will be if you make a different choice (if you have one) even if you don't bother to waste your time in a plan that you may not get to follow, nor find that you have no interest in following once you get there anyway.

You won't stunt your child by not following through with a Christmas letter worhty planned birth. Let yourself be part of the expeience without setting yourself up for any disapointment and plan on taking care of yourself today and following your doctors suggestions for your health right now. Imperfect is the new perfect, and always was, and will be, so don't beat yourself up about how great any child's future will be based on what his Mommy planned for his birth while he grew fingers and toes.

Those of us who gave birth without plans had healthy babies and felt just as much love for them as you will yours, no matter what you do or how popular it is today. Nobody will be able to detect a child born sans plan, so let this one go if you want to.

Enjoy being pregnant, and sleep now. Google nothing that you don't plan on (or have the time) to worry about.

M.

I have not read all the responses but I will share what happened to me. I apologize if it scares you, because I hated it when I was pregnant and people told me horror stories. It's not a horror story, just a lesson in how sometimes you can have all the best plans in the world and in the end all that matters is that the baby comes out alive and well.

I had a fabulous pregnancy, no complications whatsoever. I had been to birthing classes and I had an idea in mind that I would opt for an epidural because I can't stand being in pain for any reason and it's not like they hand out trophies to the moms that go natural. Don't get me wrong, I'm not against going natural, just that everyone has to do what is right for them.

At my childbirth classes, they talked to us about the remote possibility that in "extreme emergency circumstances" it might be necessary to be put under general anesthesia for a c-section if the baby's life was at risk and there was no time for an eipdural. They reassured us though that such a thing was quite rare but still wanted us to be aware of it. Well, guess what happened to me! One week from my due date, I am home for the day and I notice I had not felt my daughter move in several hours. I get concerned and call the hospital. Nurse says probably nothing to worry about, start doing kick counts, maybe you are getting close to going into labor because they start to move less. Two more hours goes by, still no movements. I call back again and they say to come straight in. Get to the hospital, baby monitor shows she has a heartbeat but they can't explain why she's not moving so much. They decide to start an IV with dextrose and all of a sudden her heart rate plummets. Next thing I know there are a dozen nurses and doctors rushing around the room and then zipping me straight into the OR. Doctor tells me baby is in distress and we have to get her out NOW. Fastest way to do this is put me under and do a c-section (I was not in labor so I did not have any kind of epidural on board and it would have taken 30 minutes to get set up for one and have it kick in).

Next thing I know I am waking up and the nurses tell me that everything went fine and my baby girl is doing great. Turns out she had the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck twice. They think that the dextrose in the IV caused her to move in such a way that it caught tighter and caused her heart rate to drop. If I had not been paying attention, had not gone in when I did, and had not allowed the doctor to do what he needed to do, my beautiful daughter would not be here today. She is now 3 years old and she is perfectly normal - no issues stemming from being deprived of oxygen or anything of that nature.

Again, I am sorry if this has scared the bejeezus out of you, and that it is somewhat lengthy. I just always feel the need to share my cautionary tale with anyone that is mulling over birth plans. It's always good to have a plan but to still realize that sometimes we have to let go of our ideas about how something "should" go in order for it to turn out well. A good friend of mine ended up needing a c-section to have her son - he was not positioned well and was also huge and in spite of all her effort, it became apparent that the baby had other ideas. She told me she could not help but feel disappointed because she wanted to be able to feel like she actually "gave birth". I reminded her of what happened to me and that she still has a healthy happy baby and that's is all that matters.

I am sorry too if it sounds like I am being disrespectful of those who want to go with very specific birth plans - that's not my intention. It's just that because of what happened to me, I tend to have a different perspective on things.

Good luck, I wish you all the best! :)

Even if I had a birthing plan, I delievered too fast to be able to follow it! I delievered in less then an hour with almost no pain, and no pain medicine. Just be aware that what you want, may not happen. Make your own style, do it how you want. Take Care!

I never took classes and had no "plan" beyond seeing how things went, trusting my body and my doctor, and hoping I could handle it without an epidural. I was induced with both of my kids and opted for an epidural both times. I was very fortunate to have fast, easy deliveries and fast, easy recoveries. I am totally indifferent to childbirth emotionally as long as the job gets done and everyone ends up okay. On the other hand, I had family upset with me that I didn't take classes or have more interest in the experience than that, but that is just me. I adore my kids but will have the same indifferent attitude about delivery with our third. :) The only thing I was adamant about was that I did not want an episiotomy and I wanted some privacy to nurse the first time, but that was it.

I have given birth twice and both of my children were induced. I "lived" through the pains of labor for about 90 minutes and jumped at the chance to have an epidural. You have to do what you feel is best for you. We (friends and family) can all give you advice but in the end you have to be comfortable . . . some women can handle the pain of labor, I could not. I was much happier and much more comfortable with an epidural and if I were to have a third I would do it again. For me, the birthing of my children was relaxed, I was calm, I enjoyed it. Again, this is just my experience and again, you really have to go with your gut and how you feel you want to experience this. Good luck to you!

I agree totally with Julie H. I would just like to stress the importance of a doula. Even if you are planning all sorts of medical interventions, having a constant support person there - one who is not keeping the hospital's best interests in mind - can be extremely helpful. Suppose you are interested in avoiding a C-section (which is a good idea). It is very hard to know if a C-section is being pushed on you in your best interest, or in the doctor's best interest. A doula will help you know if a C-section is actually necessary.

I also wanted to make a quick comment about epidurals. Some responders wrote things like "you don't get a medal for doing it naturally" and "you don't love your kids more if you do it naturally." As Julie H. suggested, research the risks and benefits of every intervention. There is an extremely slight risk with an epidural of paralysis. I personally didn't want to risk it if at all possible. A friend of mine, a labor and delivery nurse, had an epidural with her first. She was unable to hold her child after the birth because her arms didn't work. That lasted only a short time, but she successfully gave birth naturally after that. Epidurals aren't bad, but they aren't without risk.

It seems that you've gotten a lot of "make not plan because it might not go your way" comments, so I will say my piece. I made a birth plan mostly my first and third time (the second time I think I did make one but didn't even bother showing it to my midwive because I trusted where I was delivering so much). Most of the things were the same, but a few I learned more about by the third child. I think that the more you are informed the more likely birth is to go your way. Look at the research. There is a lot done for the ease of the doctors/hospital, not for your benefit. The United States has a terrible Maternal dealth rate and infant death rate and very poor maternity care when compared to the rest of the industrialized world. I found a doula very helpful as well as natural birthing classes. I do recommend a natural birth. I had three, and when talking to women I find that many women who planned on and had a natural birth really LOVED their birth experiences, but most women who had epidurals say "well, I got a healthy baby in the end and that's all that counts." It is important to have a healthy baby in the end, and I would not put my kids at risk, but it's nice to enjoy the trip there more and there is a lot of information about the health of the mother and baby when it comes to any sort of medical pain relief. None of my births went as planned exactly, there were little things that weren't perfect, that I would change next time, and if it were necessary I certainly would do what was needed for a healthy baby, but with it all even, I would take my emotion ride natural birth over sleeping through the contractions any day! I have a real love for my body that I never had before, and I am so happy to get to share that with my kids.

If you have any questions, feel free to ask. I love to talk about birth!

K.

You are smart to keep your options open. It is also smart to educate yourself. There are risks and benefits to every labor intervention. Find out what they are and when it is to your advantage to use the intervention. I can't really suggest a plan but here are my thoughts on it.

In terms of "attempting no epidural", know that most hospitals are not set up for unmedicated low intervention births. Plenty of L&D nurses will attest to this. It is not the norm for them. Know that if you get a nurse that you don't click with you can ask for another nurse. If you want an unmedicated birth request a nurse who believes in this philosophy. Nurses are extremely important. During labor you will see them more than your doctor (unless you choose a midwife).

If you are considering going unmedicated, hire a doula. Doulas can help with pain management and getting your baby in a good position to be birthed. They also have the experience to help reassure you that your labor is normal. A lot of dads and some moms think that a doula is there to take a husband's place. I don't know about your husband but mine had never witnessed a birth before. Doulas are an extra set of hands, eyes, and ears when your family members get tired.

Choose a provider carefully. Look at the risks and benefits of an OB vs. a midwife vs. a family practice doctor. OBs have the highest cesarean rates. They are trained to look for abnormalities. Most have never seen a "normal" unmedicated birth from start to finish. They don't know what it looks like. Check out the midwifery model of care. See if this fits what you would like in a care provider. Midwifes following the midwifery model will be more holistic and much more hands on. Know that all midwives don't practice the midwifery model. Choose accordingly. In some areas, there are still a few family doctors attending births. Their practice style is probably between the OBs and the midwives.

When you interview a provider - what are each provider's cesarean rates? Their induction rates? Some providers have over a 50% cesarean rate. If you are into gambling the odds aren't really in your favor with these OBs.

If there is a birthing center around you check into that. Some moms also choose homebirth. Even if you don't feel comfortable with any of this explore all your possibilities and talk to moms who have.

A good plan is to try to avoid an induction unless it is medically necessary. Inductions and cesareans for "big babies" are not a medical necessity. Current research has shown that inductions increase the risk of a cesarean section. Inductions can be harder on the baby sometimes leading to abnormal heart patterns and "fetal distress." Many moms find that induced labors mean harder and more painful contractions thus increasing the need for epidurals and other pain meds.

Currently, the cesarean rate is 32%. The World Health Organization suggests that countries should not exceed 15%. Obviously, some cesareans are necessary. Many are not. The first cesarean is not so risky. It is the subsequent ones that are risky for you - it is major surgery. If you think you might want to have a larger family avoiding a first cesarean is important. Although vaginal births after cesarean have been deemed safe (even after multiple cesareans), it is sometimes harder to find a care provider. Placental abnormalities, injuries to bowels and bladders are much more common after multiple cesareans.

During labor, you always have the option to ask what the risks and benefits are for intervention vs waiting. If the baby and you are doing all right, chances are than you are fine laboring. You can always ask for a second opinion. If you feel uncomfortable with what your provider is telling you during prenatal visits you can also switch providers.

Find out what common interventions hospitals do to babies in the postpartum period. If you want to avoid eye ointment etc. you have to explicitly say that. It helps if you do it in a written document. Know that in the event that you have a cesarean, some hospitals routinely separate moms from babies for hours. Find out the policy of the hospital that you are going to. You have the right of informed consent and refusal to any procedures done to you or your baby.

Read lots of positive birth stories. It is important to believe in yourself and your ability to birth. There is also nothing wrong with you choosing an epidural if you have educated yourself and it is what you feel you need at the time.

Another great resource is your local ICAN chapter. There is one in the Kansas City area.

I know a lot of moms like Bradley. I also know moms who plan an unmedicated birth and take hypnobirthing. Most of the childbirth education classes offered in hospitals are watered down. I think they are finding that couples aren't really taking the time to go to classes so they have to plan for their consumers. Bradley will be much more comprehensive. If you are considering Bradley - look into it now. There are many weeks of sessions and it won't be offered all the time.

Good luck,

My birth plan covered things like "no eye ointment, no Vitamin K shot, no vaccinations, let me birth naturally ie do not offer pain medication, allow me to push the baby out in the best way possible (I gave birth on hands and knees for two of them and squatting for one), no additional medical personnel allowed ie no student doctors, allow me to hold the baby and offer the breast right after the birth." But I also prepared my self for something to go wrong, I wasn't clueless, yk?

I used the Bradley Method because it taught me and my husband exactly what was happening with my body during each phase of the labor, how to identify transition, and how to breath correctly. I'm a good visualizer, so I liked the "focusing inward" method of Bradley rather than the "focus on a point on the wall" method of Lamaze. I especially liked how the Bradley Method totally involves the husband/birth partner and educates them as much as the mother.

I was lucky, I had no complications and was allowed to birth the way I wanted to. However, I was also aware of the signs of complications and planned for those, too, so that the stress of making those decisions was done BEFORE the birth, not in the midst of a contraction. I do strongly suggest the Bradley Method, it will help you avoid pain medication, but even if you end up with a c-section or epidural, it won't feel like a failure, it will help you have the best and least traumatic birth possible. I also suggest birthing with a midwife, if possible, they are far better trained than OB/GYNs in the birthing process, INMSHO.

When I met with my doctor and went over a birthing plan, I told him it would be NICE not to have a C-section, but the goal here was to have as healthy a baby as possible and if an emergency came up, then I was good with what ever he had to do.
My labor was 36 hrs long. The epidural was wonderful relief from the pain after 16 hrs with no pain relief and dilated to only 3 cm. I had a chance to get some rest, and when it was time to push it only took 1.5 hrs.
Our son was 9 lbs 1.5 oz and I was very happy with the whole experience.

I agree with everyone that a birth plan is NOT absolute...it's more of a wish list..."in a perfect world I would like"....but you have to be flexible....you may give birth in 4 hours like all my friends and not have time to think about anything, or you may be in labor for 65 hours like I was and be totally exhausted and out of coping strategies. I do think a birth plan will give you things to think about. I took the six week class at the hospital, and it answered most of the questions I had when I looked at a birth plan form. I wish I had done the Bradley classes last time when we didn't have a kid at home to make scheduling classes difficult. Next time, I'll have a doula--even if I use an epidural. I also went into the experience thinking "maybe I won't get an epidural...we'll see how it goes" and the nurses laughed at me..."you'll take it"...I did, on day three, but I don't know what I would have done in a shorter labor. My epidural stopped working and then I was in constant pain, so when they topped it off, then I couldn't feel a thing, so my doc had me flat on my back to push, which was my biggest gripe with my birth, and the one thing on my birth plan that definitely wasn't followed. I was pushing for 2.5 hours, trying to convince the doc to let me sit up a little the whole time. The best thing to do is be informed of all the possible interventions and their risks and benefits, so you know beforehand what to expect and what your wishes are...the more you know the less stressful the experience will be. Good luck!