Breastfeeding Question - Milwaukee, WI

I personally would stay away from the pacifier :) I never gave my kids the option and I feel it saved a fight I've seen with many parents and their kids. I used to watch my kids start to fall asleep and then I'd take them to the crib. They always woke up and cried. I let them cry until they fell asleep. My 18 month old still cries himself to sleep some nights, he was done breast feeding at 9 months. It is better than having a dependancy on a pacifier, a bottle, or some one holding them to sleep.
My cousin used to use the same blanket for every nap and bedtime for her kids. She would swaddle them up and that was a routine for them to sleep. Her 3 year old still sleeps with the same blanket. Some people have put soft music on in the room and that helps their kids to sleep. No matter what you choose to try it will probably take about a week or two to get her into a routine, so be patient.
Good luck !
A.

My daughter did this too, except when I would try and lay her in her crib, she'd wake up knowing she wasn't on the nipple anymore. Then, we'd be back to square one and my being afraid to try it again and waking her up. I was also not fond of Nuks. Try to have her get comforted to sleep some other way. It's a hard balance...but do something else cuddley with her before she falls asleep. When she's nursing, as soon as you see her getting sleepy and not sucking hard...then you know it's for the comfort of falling asleep, and not for eating. Pull her off and cuddle her a bit instead, or put her in her crib and rock her a bit until she falls asleep. During the rest of your feedings, try not to let her fall asleep nursing...and then she'll be less dependant on the breast for a sleeping comfort. Good luck. :)

I have an 8 month old baby girl, who loves to nurse. When my daughter was around 3 or 4 months old I noticed that she needed to suckle in order to fall asleep. I made the mistake of letting her always fall asleep at the nipple so now at 8 months she depends on it. I would suggest trying to keep her awake while nursing and then if you notice her drifting off, take her off your nipple and lay her down. If she is anything like my daughter I'm sure she will wake right up and start screaming until I pick her up again. Sooner or later she should get used to the idea that she can fall asleep on her own. Just don't wait as long as I have. I fall asleep with my daughter nursing in our bed and then a few times in the night she wakes up just to suck, for comfort. I am trying to transition her to her crib but it is really hard. She is kinda set in her ways. Good Luck!!-K.

i have 4 children 4,7,21 and 24. if you keep nursing her anytime she wants it, you have formed a habit. for bed i would nurse them to sleep. if she is not accually sucking milk and she is sleeping, gentle stop the suction by gentle press on the side of your nipple to release, and put them to bed. i hate pacifiers. the demand will decrease as the child gets older. my children learned to suck on there hands.

Both my boys nursed to sleep until ove ra year old, my youngset is 17 months and still nursing to sleep! Its not a problem, as long as its not causing any problems at night, doln't worry about it. :)

Hi V.

I have a 6 month old son who used to do exactly what your daughter is doing, needing the breast to fall asleep. he used to never take a pacifier always spitting it out. We tried different pacifiers until we found one that he liked and it is the only one he will take so babies definetly have a preference. The one we use is platex brand for 3+ months that was reccomended by dentists because it doesn't mess up their mouth compared to the thumb. Our son loves it and it has been great for car rides, stores, and sleeping through the night. Instead of using me as his human pacifier he has his own.

I would try and put her down in her crib when she starts to get tired and learn how to self soothe and fall asleep without depending on anything.
Not to scare you but a friend of mine breastfed til her daughter was 2. Anytime the little girl whined, cried or needed to nap she was on the boob. Now she is 2.5 and not breastfeeding but this little girl is a mess she doesn't know how to self soothe, go to sleep on her own and is very whiney and crys ALOT there are other problems going on too but she still asks to be breastfed.

Hi, V.!

I breastfed both of my children (3 years and 1 year). I never used a pacifier for either one. I don't believe in them. I also had and still have two awesome sleepers. What I found worked best was a bedtime routine. Because your daughter is already four months old, it might take a little while to get used to, but it works like a charm. I always did "nurse, then bath, then book, then song and bed". When they were small like yours, I always rocked them completely to sleep. I didn't put them down awake until they were a little older. But not getting into the habit of nursing to sleep seemed to avoid the whole issue. At your daughter's age, I definitely don't encourage using a pacifier. She's getting beyond the point of "needing" to suck and is starting to develop habits at this point.

As for wanting to nurse all the time, I believe in doing it during the waking hours as much as needed. They go through growth spurts and they build up your milk supply by nursing frequently.

Hope this helps. Let me know if you have more questions.

My son was over a year old before I stopped breastfeeding him before bed. How I did it was by having him feed for a shorter and shorter time each night until I was just cuddling him to bed. Then I started just cuddling him for a little bit and putting him to bed awake. Things take time so don't expect your child to get used to it right away. I would stay away from pacifiers if you can help it. My son used a pacifier but we started taking it away when he was 9 months old and he didn't miss it at all.

I've noticed if the pacifier is to small it will pop out. You might just try a differnt size or shape to see what she feels comfortable with. Both my girls took a pacy and there teeth where fine...if that is the concern. Plus, my youngest sucked her thumb too! The dentist said she was fine.
The other suggestion is putting your pinky finger (palm facing upward) into her mouth towards the roof of her mouth near her front teeth and let her suck on that. My girls would do that if I happened to not have their pacy with me. Just don't get to far from the front teeth or it will trigger a gag reflex. Hope it helps.

You don't really say in your question why this is a problem for you, so I'll first comment that I think this is normal behavior for such a young baby and you don't really NEED to do anything about it. Some babies will never take a pacifier - they know what is the real thing!

That said, around this age (or really a little older, like 6 months), we started having my husband rock or pace both my babies to sleep at bedtime. I really needed the break and I did want to feel like they would know they COULD go to sleep without the breast. They still both mostly get nursed to sleep, but I can leave it to my husband now if I need to.

I also want to highly recommend the breastfeeding message boards at mothering.com Lots of experienced mamas there happy to answer questions and offer encouragement.

Good for you! Breastfeeding is one of the best things you can to to give your little girl a healthy start in life.

ETA, I also wanted to recommend Elizabeth Pantley's book, The No Cry Sleep Solution. She has lots of suggestions for helping a baby go to sleep without nursing.

ARghh.. Breastmilk does not cause tooth decay. Ignore anyone who tells you this!!

I breastfed both of my boys exclusively for just over a year each, and I had the same problem with mine. THe only thing I worried about was baby bottle tooth decay...my dentist says it's just like putting them to bed with a bottle, and once they have teeth, it can cause tooth decay. So once she starts to get teeth, I would make sure to try and put her down without feeding her (of course, once in a while, I had to nurse mine to bed anyway), but my dentist also recommended that I try to wipe their teeth with a wet washcloth before sending them off to bed. I just feel that most babies at age 4 months don't have the ability to self-soothe...that will come later, but right now, just keep nursing. It's so important.

**Please ignore those who tell you that breast milk cannot cause tooth decay, because it can. I used to work for a dentist and have seen its effects. Breastmilk (as well as formula) has sugar in it. Although it is not as harmful as formula, it can cause decay after repeated exposures of being left on the teeth all night long.

You might try passing your daughter on to someone else after she's nursed at night. My son is now 5 mos. old. He still needs to eat right before bed, but he went through a stretch of time when he wanted to use me as his human pacifier, lol. When my husband would hold him, he'd fuss a little but then settle in and fall asleep. I've definitely noticed that when I'm around, he thinks he's hungry, but when it's Daddy, then he just wants a little comfort and he's fine. I'd skip the pacifier if she hasn't taken to it yet. Oh, one more suggestion -- if you pop her off your nipple when she's started to fall asleep, she may just lie there for a while. I wouldn't hurry to put her in her crib, lol. If I let my son stay right next to my bare breast for a bit, he's much more likely to fall asleep and stay asleep. Good luck! She's probably going through a growth spurt and it WILL get better. I've been there!