Breastfeeding Question Regarding Soothing a Newborn

Updated on February 20, 2016
J.W. asks from Springfield, PA
25 answers

My daughter is 5 weeks old and I just want some advice on whether this is normal. I feel like she's either breastfeeding, sleeping or fussy. And the fussiness is only soothed by breastfeeding...so I'm not sure if she needs all the breastfeeding or if she's just a fussier baby than my son. I'm not used to this b/c my son was just the most laid back, low maintenance baby...so I don't have anything to compare her behavior to. When he was little I don't think I hardly ever remembering him fussing much at all about anything. I guess I just feel like I'm constantly breastfeeding her and if that's what she needs to feel safe and comforted, I'm fine with that...I just wanted any other Mom's experiences with whether this is the right thing to do. Because if she was bottle fed, I wouldn't just stick a bottle in her mouth every time she fussed...and I know breastfeeding is more than just nourishment so my gut instinct tells me to just put her to breast b/c whenever she's fussy that seems to be the only thing that calms her down and soothes her. Any advice or thoughts would be appreciated. Thanx in advance!

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

More Answers

K.C.

answers from Barnstable on

Great gut instinct! Boobies, as you may have noticed, are not see-through. So we never truly know how much a baby gets in one feeding. By putting her to the breast whenever she asks, you are doing what nature intended - you are "ramping up" milk production to meet her needs. Absolutely, you are doing a PERFECT job (I counsel so many moms that try to "space" out feedings and it just causes such production and latch problems). And remember - she is really little. So many feedings a day - nearly non-stop little snacks is normally for such a tiny tummy.

A frantic baby often will put their tongue to the roof of their mouth. Then, when mom finally goes to nurse them, they can't latch on right and get really frustrated.

So stick with what you are doing!! My son and daughter were both the type of child that needed to be held - non-stop. I found wearing them really freed up my arms, so I could go about my day with happy, boobie fed babies strapped to me. I wore them when they were young (under 10 months) in a MOBY wrap and also a BabyHawk (which is still adored and used ALOT).

My only question to you would be: does she seem to be latching fine? Since you are a "seasoned boob" as we call them, does she feel like she is latching on right to you? My son was basically a barnacle attached to my boobs for the first 4 months and he nursed fine (he was a TANK). He just loved the tatas :)

Great job!!! AWESOME!

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

P.M.

answers from Portland on

Nursing is automatically soothing for infants (except for those who arch away from the breast, struggle and cry – now there's a distressing dynamic for both mother and child). She will probably outgrow her constant need for this gentle distraction by the end of her third month.

She's still adapting to being outside of you. Her vision and nervous system have a ways to go before she'll really start relating to the outside world, so physical contact, sound and cuddling are essential to her sense of security.

I hope you'll read Dr. Harvey Karp's book, the happiest baby on the block, to learn how and why swinging and jiggling your baby, stomach-to-skin contact, a loud swooshing sound (hair dryer, vacuum cleaner, noise machine), snug swaddling can all help soothe her, too. Lots of moms find that wearing their baby in a sling for the first few months works like magic, and allows the moms to have hands free for other tasks.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.B.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

Yep my oldest was a comfort nurser big time. In some ways I actually prefer this because she wouldn't take a soother and didn't suck her thumb, she used me! That was absolutely perfect and exactly the way it should be. Not only is it awesome for your milk production it also makes for an absolutely wonderful mother and baby bond.
Now I have a three month old who nurses to eat and sometimes nurses to sleep, but much prefers to chew on his fist/suck his thumb. I'd rather he used me, but he's considerably more independent, even as a baby, than my oldest ever was.
Enjoy this while it lasts and congratulations!

1 mom found this helpful

M.R.

answers from Rochester on

My second was more of a comfort nurser than my first. I found wearing him in a sling was great--sometimes they just want to cuddle and be close. She's so young--nurse her anytime she'll latch on. Once they were a bit older (still babies) my boys would just want to pacify themselves and would get so mad when they started getting milk, so I knew they just wanted a pacifier at that point. If you don't have a sling, give it a shot--she might love it frees you up to keep from always being in a state of undress if she really doesn't want to nurse. :)

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.P.

answers from Boston on

If breastfeeding is the only thing to calm him, just do it and don't stress about it. I know it can be a strain on you when you feel like its all you're doing all day, but he might be going through a growth spurt too and needing to nurse more often. My son is 5 months now and definitely goes through periods where he is nursing constantly. It usually only lasts a few days then he is back to normal. I also nurse him whenever he is fussy, sometimes he calms down and sometimes he doesn't (now I think its teething). The greatest thing about it is that you don't waste any time or money making bottles that he doesn't eat because you thought he was hungry. Just go with your gut. My son also nurses for comfort sometimes because he takes a few sips then just sits happily in my lap staring at me.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.C.

answers from Fort Wayne on

She's so little right now. If giving her the breast calms her down, then give her the breast. Both my girls were boobaholics until they hit about 2 months old. My youngest is 9 months and I can't even take off my shirt in front of her unless I'm going to nurse! LOL! You are doing a PERFECT job!
Congrats on your new baby :D

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.C.

answers from Chicago on

I think breastfeeding to soothe a fussy baby is a wonderful thing to do. My son was a very laid back baby. My daughter, on the other hand (now 18 mo.) was very fussy...borderline colicky. After a few months I eliminated milk from my diet (she was exclusively breastfed) and she was a different, happy, cheerful baby. My ped. disagreed, but I truly think she had a sensitivity to either dairy or lactose. She seems to have outgrown it now. Look at your diet & see if there is a correlation b/t any foods you eat & your baby's fussiness. She may be fussy for a reason...though I know it's very hard to figure it out & by the time you do (if you can), there may be a new issue at hand. Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful

C.C.

answers from Fresno on

My younger daughter seemed to enjoy nursing for comfort, too. Because my husband was away on business for an extended period of time, and I had a 2 year old to take care of, breastfeeding all the time wasn't feasible for me. As such, I gave her a binky and she loved that. It made her as happy as she could be, and she had no kind of nipple confusion when it came time to eat. She was still a champion eater! So, if you are okay with it, you might try giving her a binky every now and then as well. =)

S.Y.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Absolutely! Good job Momma!
Remember that if your baby just needs comfort, she will do what is called a "flutter suck" and not get ton of milk. So go ahead and offer her the breast.
NOW this is a hot topic, and LLL may warn you against it, but you can try a pacifier. I have FIVE years of breastfeeding under my belt, and believe me when I say I have been through the "human pacifier" thing with my first two children. With my baby (now 8 months) I started giving him a binky and NO my supply didn't dwindle and NO he didn't wean. I just became more SANE. For what it is worth. :)

A.G.

answers from Pocatello on

I have had two daughters and it sounds totally normal to me. My mom always told me to do whatever makes them happy at this age. They are too little to develop bad habits and if she is fussy and BF is what calms her down then she is either hungry (which is so normal for little ones to eat every hour and 1/2 to 2 hours) or she needs the comfort which is fine too. If nursing gives her that comfort I say go for it. I always just nursed my babies on demand or would offer my breast if they were every really fussy for no reason. It always made them happy and help me stay stress free knowing I could relax and just let her nurse.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.S.

answers from New York on

Give her babies magic tea to soothe from any tummy issue. This tea is organic and has no preservatives at all.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

H.S.

answers from Philadelphia on

Hi, J.,

Just went through this myself! Weeks 5 to 7 with my newborn were the WORST!!! And he wasn't even so bad compared to other stories I have heard. :-) I spent many nights from 5pm to 9pm, nursing, jiggling, and running a hairdryer (set to cool) next to my fussy guy's head (not blowing at him, blowing away from him so he could listen to the really loud white noise). Crazy, right? Then week 8, he turned back into a lovely baby who napped well and didn't melt down from 5 to 9 every night. Now he's 12 weeks old and the naps are going badly again - it never ends!!! :-)

He is also my second, although I had a fairly challenging baby the first time round. I'm not sure if he is a little easier or if I'm just more relaxed this time. But either way, your experience is totally normal and there are many theories as to why newborns' fussiness peaks at 6 weeks.

Best book ever for coping if you don't know it already: "The Happiest Baby on the Block." Gives really effective tools for soothing your fussy newborn.

Good luck to you - this too shall pass, as I keep trying to remind myself,
H. S.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.C.

answers from Allentown on

I had the same issue with my 3rd son. It was like he was constantly nursing. And when he wasn't nursing he was complaining. I talked to Le leche because I thought maybe he was reacting to me drinking a lot of milk. (my husband is lactose intolerant) What it ended up being is that I had forceful let down coupled with over supply. So what was happening is he was getting a lot of pre-milk which has a lot of lactose in it. That would give him gas and make him super fussy. The solution was to lay down on my back and nurse him like that. This slowed down the let down as well as the milk production slowed a little and it allowed him to get more hind milk. In just a day or so he was acting MUCH better. That coupled with watching "The Happiest Baby on the Block" DVD really helped. This DVD shows you how to properly swaddling as well as apply the other "S's" to soothe your baby. Check with your local Le Leche League and see what they have to say. Good Luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.B.

answers from Philadelphia on

I haven't read the answers so if I repeat, I';m sorry. I'm so glad you asked this question. When my son was this age I asked people and never got the correct answer. So I'm giving it to you - your child is going through a point where she needs to eat more to get your milk supply up. I forget the term for this. My doctor never told me about it. This usually happens around week 6 but can be earlier. it also happens for some around week 12. Nurse her as much as she wants. It can take up to a week of this but she needs it to grow. I didn't know this and think my son wasn't getting enough food b/c I didn't feed him on command at this point. I really regret not knowing the facts back then. Hope this helps. If you need any other info feel free to email me! good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.C.

answers from Johnstown on

Just a thought... Maybe you had more milk supply with your son. Have you tried pumping? Perhaps if you were to pump and see what you're producing you could be a little more aware of what she's getting. I speak from experience. There is no way to know how much they're getting when they nurse (unlike the measured bottles you can see if they finish.) My daughter was similar to what you are describing, and I found that I was not producing much milk - so I would let her nurse, then suppliment with formula (she drank it off of a spoon as young as two weeks old - so as not to confuse her desire to nurse.) I eventually started making more milk with the help of blessed thistle, and funugreek (and she was a much happier baby ever after.) Good luck.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

E.F.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I would check that she is gaining weight appropriately. She might be hungry. You can have low milk supply with one kid and not the others. The other thing is that if she's on-and-off all the time, she may be getting lots of foremilk (high in sugar) and not enough hindmilk (high in fat). That can cause her to be a.) fussy and b.) not getting enough calories. If she's gaining in weight enough (and remember, there is a big growth spurt at about 6 weeks), they I'd try introducing a pacifier for the times when she wants you and you aren't available. It's great to nurse on demand if that's what you want to do, but you have an older child and other things, and if you don't want to be available to nurse 24/7 that's ok too. I also think that swaddling might help for when she's fussy. Do you know Harvey Karp's 5 'S's? If not, look them up... it really does work!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.C.

answers from Pittsburgh on

This is likely totally normal cluster feeding because she's going through a growth spurt - very typical at that age.

However, I want to throw out one other option - does she spit up a lot (ie, after pretty much every feeding)? If so, she might have reflux. One of my sons had this, and because breastmilk is a natural antacid, he wanted to nurse all the time because it made him feel so much better. It creates a bit of a vicious cycle - more eating makes the stomach make more acid, and more acid means more pain for the baby when he spits up, so then the baby wants to eat again to get the antacid affect, which triggers the acid again... My pediatrician said this was very typical behavior for a reflux baby (also see http://www.kellymom.com/babyconcerns/reflux.html#refluxsy.... We ended up going to an antacid medicine for him. The medicine doesn't stop the spitup, but it cuts down on the amount of acid so it doesn't hurt. If you this sounds like your baby (with the spitup, etc), please talk to your pediatrician.

Again, there can be lots of reasons for a baby to want to nurse constantly, and most are totally normal.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.O.

answers from Philadelphia on

I would highly recommend NOT using a pacifier. This could cause early weaning. Instead, I'd do exactly what you are doing. Sounds like you are trusting your instincts. There's a lot of myths out there regarding milk supply. I can tell you that if you use a pacifier, there's a higher chance that your milk supply will go down and the baby will have a shorter duration of breastfeeding.

What you are doing is perfect. Keep it going, mama!!!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

H.A.

answers from Dallas on

You might try getting some generic Mylicon drops. Gas can cause extra fussiness and it's very common in babies. Sucking helps soothe upset stomachs. Does her stomach feel tight? Does she have "frog belly" (it looks round on the sides like a frog)? Those are signs of some pretty noticeable gas. Mylicon is perfectly safe and a measured amount in the back corner of her cheek before feedings might help her feel better.

Other then that - don't feel bad about nursing her. Nursing babies nurse often before growth spurts, and early on to build your milk supply up. Nursing for comfort won't hurt her at all.

Congrats on your newborn.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.O.

answers from Detroit on

yup normal.. my duagher was the same way.. fuss cry nurse fuss cry...nap.

you can try a pacifier and see if she just needs to suck.

I wouldnt put her on the breast unless it had been 1-2 hours since her last nursing- try swaddling rocking swaying pacifiers.. she might just be tired..

newborns shouldnt be awake more than 2 hours or they get overstimulated.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.C.

answers from Houston on

I truly believe that breastfeeding can help you keep your sanity with a baby. I nursed on demand for a year and at nap/night time until 18 months.

My biggest regret? That I couldn't whip out my boob when she was having a meltdown at two years old! LOL.

It could soothe almost any hurt, discomfort, or pain...real or imagined. As a new mom, it was comforting to know that I always had at least ONE right answer.

Every baby has different needs and a baby can suckle without drinking. A lot of people will talk about "not letting your baby use you for a pacifier"...but we give them a pacifier?!?!?! Why not teach them to seek their mother for comfort?

For the record...I am not opposed to pacifiers but I used it sparingly (in the car and during sleeping times)...mostly because I had to go back to work and it required that I travel. It was important that she had another way to comfort herself. It is your choice, she is certainly old enough that you shouldn't have a problem with nipple confusion, but I definitely used the breast when available.

She was also quite gassy, so I eliminated the enormous amount of milk I was drinking for about four months. Then I introduced it back in slowly. Breastmilk also has lactose, it is the protein casein that is the culprit for most sensitivities and allergies in babies and children.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.P.

answers from Allentown on

Sounds like a normal newborn to me! ;-)
It's possible that she's hitting her 6 wk growth spurt, so she may be nursing more frequently b/c of that.
It's also possible (and from what it sounds like, probable) that she's a High Need baby (www.askdrsears.com has some great info on them!).

Do you have a good baby sling? If not, GET ONE! It will save your sanity! You can hold her & even nurse her hands-free so that you can still easily meet your sons needs & so that he doesn't feel neglected.

In the Mamapedia Marketplace, THING-A-MA-SLING offers a 15% discount for Mamapedia members if you're interested.

Just keep in mind that as mentally exhausting as this phase is, it won't last forever. It sounds like you're doing everything "right" & that everything is perfectly normal. I think you just ended up w/ a High Need baby this time around.

"The Fussy Baby Book" or "Attachment Parenting" (both by Dr. Sears) would be great reads for you (when you have the time! lol).
Good luck & hang in there!!!!!! Keep up the awesome work,mama!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

E.N.

answers from Philadelphia on

When you had your first child, you may have been more relaxed. Now that you have a second child, you realize that you have a lot more to do. In order to make sure that you are doing the right thing, nursing her "on demand" is almost expected, and she's probably getting ready for another growth spiirt and that "demands" nursing, almost constantly. Good luck with your new "precious" member of your family.
E.

D.S.

answers from Allentown on

Hi, J.:

Consult your local breast feeding consultant at La Leche League.
www.llli.org
Hope this helps. Good luck. D.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.G.

answers from Columbus on

Babies have different personalities for sure! My first 2 were calm, nurse, sleep, nurse, sleep but my 3rd who is 6mos is totally different, he was fussy, wanted to nurse more.

Has this been consistent? Have you talk to the DR - is she doing anything else funny, like spitting up or pulling away, arching back - could be Gastric reflux or something else causing fussiness. but some babies are just fussier than others~!

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions