Brushing Toddlers Teeth (Or "How to Not Want to Drink at 8:30 Every Morning")

Updated on July 18, 2013
K.L. asks from Northfield, OH
14 answers

I am going nuts. I know, I should have pushed this issue long ago. But I didn't, and now I'm paying, and so is my kid.

My son just turned two. He didn't even get any teeth until right before his first birthday. I used to wipe his teeth off with a wash cloth whenever I would wash his face, but never got him used to a toothbrush. I have been trying for months to get him used to brushing, but I am failing miserably. Every morning and evening it's a fight.

He LOOOVES to hold his toothbrush in his mouth when I let him take a turn. He will put it in his mouth and suck all the water or baby toothpaste off. I try to let him play with it in his mouth for a minute and then tell him it's my turn. This usually results in a screamfest with him biting down on the toothbrush so I can't remove it from his mouth, or him clenching his teeth so bad I can't get in there (at least when he does that I can brush the outside of his teeth!)

What do I do? Have you dealt with your kids putting up a fight with brushing? Short of straddling him and propping his jaw open, how do I get him to not hate this thing he will have to do twice a day for the rest of his life?

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So What Happened?

I should mention too, that he is a very young two years old. He just turned two last week, and is behind in some areas due to his severe prematurity (born at 27 weeks). So as much as I would love to sit down and have a conversation with him about why he needs to brush and consequences, he just doesn't get it yet.

He does watch us and his big sister brush every day. We talk to him and show him what he should do when it's his turn to play. I keep hoping that he'll start to mimic what we do.

I did try the toothbrush that goes on my finger. He bites HARD.

A battery operated one is a great idea! I will try that! Serious "duh" moment here. My 5 year old has one of them and loves it. I can't believe I didn't think of that.

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A.H.

answers from San Francisco on

Have you tried a fun battery operated toothbrush?
Personally, I was fortunate to not have that problem. I think most kids love the battery operated toothbrushes though. It kind of tickles and makes it fun! I also recommend finding a good childrens dentist. In my opinion, it is so worth the little extra you spend. My daughter LOVES her dentist and asks me all the time when she gets to go back.

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A.L.

answers from Austin on

Kids get so few choices - I agree with giving him a little control - with "parent approved" conditions. Buy TWO fun toothbrushes. Brushing teeth is NOT an option - choosing which toothbrush (or toothpaste) to use, IS. (The cost of a second toothbrush is way less than I would pay for peace at bedtime!)

We had some luck with singing a song while the kids were brushing. The same song, every time. When the song was over, the kids knew their turn was over, and it was Mom's or Dad's turn to brush. And while we did it, we sang the same song. This way they knew there was an end in sight.

Toothbrushing is always done in the bathroom. With both kids, there were some fights early on, but eventually, the kids knew this was a battle they were not going to win. They learned the difference between 'the hard way' and 'the fun way' - we made sure to define that.

There is still some hesitance for toothbrushing, since both kids know it is the start of the bedtime routine. We threaten them with zerberts (raspberries), or tickling, or 'race' them to the bathroom. Goes back to trying to make it fun.

Good luck!

3 moms found this helpful

J.C.

answers from Columbus on

I just want to add that your headline made me laugh. I went through it too when my 8 year old was that age. We even did the straddling her and forcing her (not one of our better moments as parents).

Trust me, they get over it.

Another suggestion, let HIM pick out the spinbrush. Or get two, thus he has a choice of which toothbrushes, but not whether or not to brush.

Good luck!

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E.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

My girls always hated ME brushing their teeth, so we compromised. They could brush solo in the morning, but *I* got to do it at night. When they did it, I would try and offer instructions "all the way to the back" "do little circles" etc. I know they didn't do a stellar job, but they got better in time. By giving them some control, it helped to make the process smoother.

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M.H.

answers from Washington DC on

Don't beat yourself up too much. There were many times when we literally had to hold our daughter down to brush her teeth. It was miserable! We tried all the suggestions. A couple of things that seemed to help were (1) taking her to the dentist and having her hear from them that we needed to brush her teeth twice a day, and (2) putting on a youtube video with a cartoon cat demonstrating how to brush your teeth. I wish I could remember the name of it. We would play it while we brushed her teeth. I'm not going to kid you though, she's 4.5 years old now and it still is a dreaded task.

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K.W.

answers from Seattle on

Apparently, you really only need to brush them once every 24-hours (according to our ped dentist). So, I suggest you let him play with the toothbrush in the morning and let him practice using the brush. At night, you'll need to do a thorough brushing. I've strong-armed and threatened mine a couple of times but not much. With our second, I had to sing songs while brushing, and she had to start and then let me finish. The songs were generally nonsensical made up songs, often about tooth brushing.

Fun times. We also started flossing early (around 2yo). If it's a tough night, though, we'll forgo the flossing.

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L.A.

answers from Austin on

You are doing good, letting him have his turn.. Consider letting him brush your teeth and then you brush his.

Does he watch you and dad brush your teeth? Do you know any kids that are a little bit older that sometime he could see them brushing their teeth.

Toddlers love mimicking what the big kids and parents do.

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Don't expect him to be self sufficient in this till he's roughly 8 yrs old.
You brush and floss his teeth every morning and every night.
If he wants to, he can practice brushing either before or after you brush them but you're still doing it so you know they are clean.
When he gets to a point where he's brushing (5 or 6 yrs old) - he's always subject to inspection and if he didn't do a good job, then you do it or he does it again till he gets it right.
It takes some manual dexterity (even with a battery tooth brush) and he's a long way from having that kind of control to be adequately cleaning his own teeth.
Being vigilant about it will pay off when you don't have a lot of cavities to fill when visiting the dentist.

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S.L.

answers from New York on

great ideas here, the key is to give him some choices, but stop fighting!
He probably isnt eating a lot of candy, drinking a lot of soda, right? You don't let him fall asleep with a bottle of juice or milk right? Give him a raw apple slice four times a day and know his teeth are pretty healthy, this is just his time to play with a toothbrush and get used to it. Continue using the soft washcloth, if that is working, while you introduce the toothbrush, that way there is no stress, no worries about cleaning his teeth! have two toothbrushes, there are some that light up, some that play music, etc Ask him does he want mommy or daddy to help him? does he want to use the upstairs bathroom or the downstairs bathroom? The Elmo toothbrush or the Superman toothbrush? For the few seconds you have, try to concentrate on the upper teeth in the AM and the lower teeth in the PM, right side on even days, left side on odd days, so you know you're hitting all areas equally, if you always start in the same spot, that is the spot getting clean! We all go thru this!

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M.C.

answers from Chattanooga on

You could try getting an infants finger brush. It fits over your fingers, and has little bristles meant to clean their gums and budding teeth. Not ideal... But better than nothing.

You might let him brush your teeth while you brush his, or give him a doll and let him brush it's teeth instead.

My DD and I have brushed our teeth together ever since she was old enough to sit up on her own. She gets to brush around in her mouth while I do mine, then when I'm done I have her open wide (like an alligator! Or whatever animal she is in love with at the time...) and I chase ALLLLL the yucky germs out. I do the same with flossing. "Open up, so I can get those yucky germs! They will eat holes in your teeth if you let them stay in there!"

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T.P.

answers from Indianapolis on

We made a game of it. I would tell my daughter that I was getting the yuckys off of her teeth. When she would start to fuss I was say oh no there's a yucky let me get him before he gets in your teeth. She would say get him Mommy so I would brush more. After I would brush her teeth I would let her do it. I would find more yuckys and tell her to get them. This worked for us. Good luck.

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A.A.

answers from Tulsa on

My 2 year old insists on "helping" me brush his teeth. It's the only way he will cooperate, he has to hold the brush but lets me put my hand over his and do the actual brushing. He gets to brush his tongue all by himself (hey, he started it and I figure it can't hurt) when we are done with teeth. I think the electric toothbrush would freak him out, but who knows!

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V.S.

answers from Reading on

Singing songs, playing games, etc. I used to pretend that the toothbrush was chasing various animals (giraffe, lion, puppy) around their mouths and they would giggle and I'd get the job done.

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

That's how kids learn to brush their teeth. They chew on it, bite it, it is doing good for them even when they do that.

If you have a pediatric dentist you can visit with them during the next appointment and ask them to show little guy how to brush his teeth.

I'd ask the office manager if there is an additional charge for this because if there is then your insurance may not cover it and you'll have to pay out of pocket.

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