Can a Child Be Too Orderly?

I think it's an issue IF the child/person can't function or looses it if something isn't done or isn't done right. Being orderly and a little bit obsessive can be ok. But when it gets in the way of life, then it may need to be addressed - when it crosses from "i like it this way" to "it HAS TO BE this way."

I think I would throw a party . . . wow that must be nice. :P

All kidding aside, I wouldn't worry about it yet.

It's a lovely time right now: some toddlers love having a sense of order about things. For kids this age (and older, too) it is really all about routines. Some kids love routines, love having everything in its place, predictable.

So, in answer to your question, keep modeling the behaviors you want to see and as another poster has suggested, if your growing child becomes inflexible about changing routines (toddlers are often VERY inflexible, so this isn't a time to worry about OCD :) ) and you are starting to see this as a challenge at four, five or six, well, then you have a good reason to talk to the pediatrician. However, at this age, I don't think an evaluation would be appropriate, given the inflexibility many very young children exhibit.

The very, very short answer is yes. An obsessive interest in order can be a symptom of larger issues. BUT, you would have to be seeing a lot of other problems for this to be a red flag. All by itself, it's a good thing.

Does your son make eye contact? Does he play interactively (within reason for his age)? Is his need for orderliness consistent, or does it increase as he becomes upset/hungry/tired?

If the answer to the first three questions is yes, you have nothing to worry about at all.

I wouldn't worry about it unless he gets to the point that he has a meltdown because he has to do these things first rather than do something you are directing him to do, like go out the door to leave the house.

I had neighbors whose house was always neat as a pin and clean as if the housekeeper had just left. I mean, all the time. The woman had a new baby and a 4 year old. One day I came over for a Discovery Toy party and the little boy kind of freaked out because someone left their shoes in the floor (she took off her child's shoes). He said that Daddy would see them. He actually looked frightened, and it was unsettling to me. I knew that the husband was pretty tightly wound, but after that, I actually wondered (and still do) if perhaps he was abusive to his wife if the house wasn't perfect.

I know that this is not your household, Mom, so please don't think that I'm making that kind of assumption with you. However, it is good for you to think about your child's perception of expectations. Perhaps you might want to leave some things in your house "askew" and if he acts worried, just say "Oh, well, let's worry about that later." Then change the subject instead of running over there and fixing it. That might help.

Dawn

I'm pretty sure some people are born organized. It comforts them to know where things are, and that things are tidy.

My husband's mom said he was born organized. To this day he keeps his things very organized and tidy. I am NOT tidy, and he's okay with it. He doesn't freak out or anything when I have yarn all over the living room! My husband can't STAND leaving something unfinished. He's always been that way.

I'm sure your son is just fine. He probably derives comfort from knowing things are finished before moving on. :)

He is 2 years old LOL
Let's not jump off the diagnosis cliff just yet.

You keep a tidy and orderly home.
He sees you and his father closing doors, turning off lights, putting your toys away.
So of course he does the same thing. Children emulate what they see.

Heck at 2 my son would fold laundry, pick up toys, sweep, etc. ....no worries, now at 16, his laundry lives in a series of hampers, his things are strewn across his room and he has forgotten what a broom looks like.

Please don't worry over your son's ways right now. I predict he too will lose his interest in neatness at about the onset of the tween years.

Hmmm, but until then, maybe he could come to my house and teach my teen how to put things away again?

Hugs

My husband and I are extremely neat. My oldest son was extremely organized and neat from the time he was born. I worried that he was OCD, so I took him to the pediatrician and asked about it when he was about 2.5 years old. At the time, he wouldn't go to sleep unless every book on his bookcase was in exactly the right spot, and he was very particular about where all of his toys went. The doctor told me that as long as he was willing to make a mess when he played, that I should just be grateful that I have a neat child. Throughout his childhood, he would take out something to play with, have a great time with it, and put it away before getting out anything else. He is now almost 15, and he is still extremely tidy. :)

Our youngest son is not so neat. ;)

I think it is unusual. He's probably Type A. And as my type A niece in medical school says of all the other type A's in medical school, "there are Capital A's and lowercase A's. He might be a capital A.

Good to be orderly and turn off lights but when it becomes an issue to living life and enjoying things if those routines are off then it's a problem.

He's young.
It is most likely a phase.
At a certain age, usually during Toddlerhood, children developmentally go through stages of categorizing or grouping things or by type or function etc. and get sort of into, routines.
I would not worry about him being compulsive.
But if as he gets older, it THEN interferes with everyday functioning or impairs regular normal activity handicapping it, then, that is when to worry.

I think also, your son probably likes to be cooperative or obedient because it makes you and he, feel happy. It is like a positive reinforcement.

I can definitely relate. my son who is 10, does not like any cabinet to be slightly opened or IF our hallway closet door is not latched, he must close and latch it.. I asked him about this and he said that when the doors are not closed properly, he feels that they are mocking him.

He isn't as stern about other things such as in being clean. It would seem that taking baths doesn't hold as much importance .. :)

Also, he is very specific when it comes to making maps (which he loves to do) and they must be accurate.. Same goes with naming cities. For example, if we go out for a drive, he will know all the cities in between from the starting point and finish. Often, he will also know if it's a Republican or Democratic city...... I guess every kid has different interests.. Your child sounds normal to me :)

Okay... enjoy it while you can. Kids do the most oddest things sometimes and being tidy is one of them! haha! It is normal for a child to go through that stage. My oldest did when he was a young tot. Just be thankful for the here and now and just know that is will NOT last forever!!

I think many kids go through a similar phase of behavior at that age. My older son when through a phase where he couldn't stand to see a door standing open - any door. Unfortunately, it didn't last, and now he's as messy and disorganized as any other 6 year old.

I would celebrate! Around that age my son went through a phase where he would insist on dumping things back out after I had put them away. It's a miracle he lived past toddlerhood!

Oh boy your head would explode at my house LOL! I am not tidy and married a guy who leaves a wake of destruction in his path.

However, my middle son had a bit of a control freak thing at around your son's age. From his spot at the dinner table he could see down the hallway where are bedrooms and bathroom are. He could not sit down to eat unless all of those lights were off and the doors were closed. And for a while, he used to go around the house shutting everyone's dresser drawers and any open cabinets. He would also berate everyone else (picture a 3 year old telling his 9 year old brother "what is wrong with you that you can't close your drawers? Why is everything out all the time, it looks like your room threw up!" while pushing things closed) for failing to do this.

For my son, it was a phase that he eventually grew out of. Now he's a sloppy as the rest of us. At that age, they are learning where things go and putting things in their places gives them a sense of accomplishment and control. As long as it doesn't interfere with anything else, I'd welcome this trait!

I quickly read through some responses and am surprised that people think this is a problem. Well technically it could be, I highly doubt it is at all. He's 2 and kids at this age love order and routine routine routine. I think it's how they get better at things. Both of my kids are like this, the older one especially. At age 4, it seems he's started to let go of some so called "obsessive compulsive" behaviors while I'm reliving it all over again with the 2 year old. He has to turn off the lights, he has to get me his diaper, he has to open and close any door we come to where ever we are, he has to count all the letters in his car seat before he climbs in to it EVERYTIME, otherwise he has to do it over. It can be very trying on your patience at times, but it's just a stage.

I have watched friends kids of the same age and noticed similar type behaviors. I wouldn't worry too much, especially if he's developing normally otherwise... but go ahead and mention it to your pediatrician if you're worried.

When our daughter was 3 years old I rearranged her room to change things up. When I went back in her room a few hours later many of her things had been moved back. She looked at me and said, "Mom you put this is the wrong place". I chuckled and told her I was just rearranging her room and making some changes. She told me that she liked certain things in certain places. I thought it was cute. She was also tidy but I never thought it was overly tidy. Fast forward to 15 years old and she is diagnosed with OCD. Sometimes the signs are there. I never thought twice about it. She is now in college and doing awesome!

My mom told me starting around age 4, I used to empty my dresser drawers out and fold every thing back up and place it back in my drawers a couple of times per week. I don't remember doing this and I can assure you I do not do this today:).
I have always been pretty neat and it sounds like your son has your "neat" gene:). Do not worry.

Can we borrow him for a few days?

I have not taught my kids to be as tidy as your son and am regretting it. But I blame my husband for the 17 moves with kids we've endured.

Don't pre-label your little guy. He's mimicking what he's learned. Does he enjoy regular play and getting dirty still?

At 25 months, it's probably nothing. Just a phase.

However, because OCD behaviors can be so hard to eradicate once they become ingrained, if this goes on much longer, I would try to direct him away from this behavior, just in case.

Great that you have tought him to be organized and clean at a young age. Just keep on loving him, having fun, and teaching him right.

I glanced through some of the responses and someone did write about a "Type A personality" This is not something to just toss around- if one reads about personality types and speaks with a good doctor I am sure they would assure you that your little one is NOT a "Type A"
Most of the time children and adults have mixed personality types and these can change.

Talk to the primary care doc. and ask them if you are a little concerned or if this stops DS from doing normal everyday activities.
Otherwise, celebrate! My child went through that phase and it is now gone! Toys everwhere ;)

My son won't leave the house everyday without his gate closed at the top of the stairs lol urs is fine