Can an 18 Month Old Be OCD?

Updated on March 01, 2008
A.E. asks from Las Vegas, NV
25 answers

Ok, so maybe I should be happy, but I am concerned about my 18 month old son. Over the last month or so, he has obsessively requested to brush his teeth and wash his hands.
Of course he wants to brush his teeth when he sees either my husband or myself doing it, but he will also ask at random times during the day. This will happen maybe 6-10 times a day (I havent tried counting). One second he will be playing or doing something, and then he starts pointing to his mouth and trying to take me to the bathroom. If I tell him no, he gets really upset, but will eventually drop it if I dont give in.
He doesnt ask to wash his hands as much as brushing his teeth, but it is the same type of deal. I had started teaching him how to wash his hands when he started learning to feed himself and would get all messy. I would only take him to the sink to wash after eating, but now he will ask at random times.
I have OCD/anal retentive tendencies, and I dont want my son to be like me in that respect. Ironically, I am hardly OCD about washing hands, brushing teeth or anything hygiene related. I believe in 5 sec rules and "God made dirt..." mentalities.
I try to limit his brushing and washing to times when it is relevant, but I dont know if that is helping or hurting. Can an 18 month old have OCD? If I dont give in to his requests, can I break the obsessive cycle or am I only making it worse?
OMG he is asking to brush his teeth right now! HELP!
Thanks moms,
A.

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So What Happened?

I just want to thank all the moms for your encouraging words. It makes sense that he could just be excited about this new thing he can do. I like the comparison to a child who watches his favorite movie over and over. He does, actually, have a couple of teeth coming in right now, so the brushing very well could be soothing to his gums. The brushing and washing is not harmful and y'all are right, it's a good habit to have! Thank you so much, you all made me feel so much better. :)

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L.S.

answers from Houston on

What I have learned from my 16 month old is that she isn't OCD, its her own way of feeling in control. By being able to brush his teeth he is doing things himself without help. the same thing with feeding, opening and closing things. heis learning to manipulate things and LOVES that he can do it ALL BY HIMSELF!! I hope this helps!!

L. S.
www.MyFamilyB4Work.com

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L.C.

answers from Killeen on

He may see you having these traits and see it as normal. I know some kids get stuck on one thing and just love doing it over and over and over...
One thing to think about, is he always doing the same thing or playing with the same toy? If he refuses to move on to anything else, then I would consult a doctor. I don't want to scare you but these are signs of autism.
My guess by what you have said is he is just imitating you.

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K.B.

answers from San Antonio on

Developmentallly at 18 mos old he probably just loves the whole water thing and because the feel of brushing teeth is good and the water is fun that is his focus right now. This too shall pass.

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J.G.

answers from San Antonio on

Ok, here is my opinion, i dont know your son or what you deal with all day long, my first guess would be to say that it is his age, but at the same time i have a 3 1/2 year old that i learned when he was 2 has ADHD and OCD, and has had it for a while, so i would say he could have it since it runs in the family, because like my son the ADHD runs on both sides (not me, but my sisters, and my husband), however the OCD he did get from me and my mom, we are all very very picky about where things are kept, how they are done, ect. Ill give you an example yesterday i went to help my son clean up the toys in his room, he has a lot of trains and they were all dumped out of the drawers, anyway i sat on the floor with him picking them up but i was just throwing them in the drawer (as i was tired and just wanted to get things over with), he got very upset with me and told me to just sit there and dont move he would do it, now what he got upset about is that i was putting the tracks in with the trains and he wants them seperate trains in one drawer and tracks in the other, then the little buildings ect in another. Even the toys in his other toy boxes have their place. As far as keeping clean he cannot stand to be dirty, if his hands get the smallest smudge he has to wash them with soap and water, if he gets dirty he has to change his clothes, even if he spills a little water on himself he has to change, i have to take a change of clothes with me every where i go, because if he can not change he goes crazy. Anyway i hope this helps you, and honestly i can not say if what you are doing would break it or make it worse.

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K.H.

answers from Austin on

Hey A.!
IMHO your son is in the 'normal' realm of kiddos :-)
My dd was particular about things like that. For us, it was the doors (cabinets/room doors/fridge), tops on bottles (milk/water/ketchup), hand washing, or if things were put up somewhere they didn't "live". For dd the phase has, for the most part, passed. She still likes doors closed and tops on, but the hand washing ended up being a desire to play with bubbles. What worked for me was letting her hand wash a few plastic dishes. I stood her on a chair in front of the kitchen sink while I loaded the dishwasher - that helped us :-) Her need for toys to be where they belong has long since passed :-) She no longer cares too much where things are :-)

I think the idea that he may enjoy the taste of the toothpaste is a good one - if you're using toothpaste. Our dentist actually said that in his opinion kids don't need toothpaste, but if it helps them *want* to brush it's not harmful. Just a thought.

hth

K., mama to
Catherine, 4yrs
Samuel, 1yr

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J.R.

answers from Austin on

I think it is possible for it to be OCD, but whether it is or isn't (aside from your anguish over wondering), you should probably handle it the same. Children, OCD or not (I have two out of my six), will tend to absorb our attitudes towards things. If you go along with the brushing teeth and hand washing, he may begin to think it necessary even if it only started out because he liked the taste of the toothpaste. And if he really is OCD, then he will eventually give up on these things, and of course find other things as he grows. I learned with my first OCD child to be compassionate about her feelings while not giving in to unreasonable demands that will limit her enjoyment of life if allowed to take over. She is 25 today and manages it well without medication. When she finds a compulsion taking over, she will make herself work on it or avoid it or whatever. We're still working with the 11-yr-old...
Blessings to you and him

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H.F.

answers from San Angelo on

I agree with other responses that say children can seem obsessive, when they really just enjoy an activity. I wouldn't be worried about the teeth brushing and I would encourage that activity. As for the hand washing, my husband had OCD with that but not until he was seven and he actually grew out of it. Because he can get raw, sore hands from washing, I would not let him use any kind of soap when he "washes." If he pitches a fit, have a softsoap pump filled with water for him to use because control is very important to kids 18 mos to 2 years. It is possible that he just likes water. Consider getting him one of those sand/water tables (we never filled ours with sand after the first time because my son poured the water in the sand and then got up in it.) It comes with boats and all. Just make sure to be right there with him at all times and dump out the water after each use.

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J.R.

answers from San Antonio on

A.,
I have teen son with OCD. All I can tell you is to relax. You could be putting your own fears onto him. Childeren at that age repeat things all the time. OCD can show itself early but doing slight behaivor modification is good enough for this age and of course watch the diet. As you know suger and caffine can enhance these behaviors. IT also takes 12 weeks to make or brake a habbit. ( on avg.)
Good Luck! Always see a doctor when you feel the need and medication isnt always the answer for childeren.

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S.M.

answers from San Antonio on

He might be just enjoying the Praise that you give him for learning this new thing and we should always praise our children for trying to do a good job. If you did not have ocd, would you even be worried or asking this question? probably not! Relax, there are much worse things that he could be doing several times a day! Don't always assume the worst and don't live in fear. Negativity WILL rub off on him. Just tell him no, and explain that we only brush our teeth at (such n' such) times. exp. after breakfast, lunch and before bed? good luck

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A.K.

answers from Austin on

i think it's normal also. maybe just don't make a big deal about it. just give him the toothbrush and see if he takes it and goes to play instead of going through the whole routine of brushing his teeth. if you're really worried then maybe try explaining (it will probably be a while before he gets it though) that he gets to brush teeth in the am and pm and if he wants to play with is toothbrush he can, but toothpaste won't be used. he may be teething still and likes how it feels. that is how my daughter was. she loved to chew on toothbrushes and gum stimulator/massage things especially when teething.
good luck!

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S.T.

answers from Houston on

often OCD isn't about germs but the ritual itself. I think that the 'germ' excuse may even become a rationale for the behavior one obsesses over. I have OCD tendancies. They seem to be better with a particular diet (limit sugar, no wheat or gluten, limited artificial stuff.) In fact, I'm hardly OCD at all. You certainly don't want to give him meds at this age for it. My husband's OCD started at about that age. He thinks he outgrew it but I think it comes back sometimes for a little while.

I think discouraging him from these activities and setting rules (you only brush your teeth after breakfast lunch and dinner) may help. If you indulge him, he may get worse. My aunt had mild OCD but by the time I married she was so bad that she never even met my husband, or later my children. She is now dead and as sad as it is, my uncle is relieved and feels free. This is worst case scenario, but you are a good mama it looks like and you're looking after him.

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R.J.

answers from Houston on

This is something that is very normal for all kids. They get obsessed with one activity or another because to them it is fun, and they want to do as much fun things as they can. Your son doesn't know that he should only brush his teeth twice a day. As far as he knows, you've just introduced him to a new activity that he likes to do, like building a block tower or reading a book. Kids will do the things they like over and over because they have no concept of the fun being worn off with overdoing. I'm telling you this because this kind of thing will happen often in your son's childhood. If he focuses on one thing for awhile it is just a phase. You know, like how some kids will watch the same video over and over again. It's normal childhood development.

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C.G.

answers from Austin on

Hi A. -

If you are truly worried you should speak with your pediatrician. My son, now 3 1/3, went through similar things at that age... I think it is normal, and just a phase. However, if you are really concerned the best bet would be to call your doctors office and talk w/them.

On another note, they are SO SMART at that age that if you show signs of his behavior bothering you it may increase the behavior. Kids are masters at reverse psychology! ;)

BEST OF LUCK! And think of it as reducing his chances of getting the flu... they say washing your hands frequently is the best, first defence against childhood illnesses. :-)

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B.K.

answers from Killeen on

One of my kids has multiple disabilities and we use picture charts with him. Try making a sticker chart with pictures of him doing the things you do in the morning. Then as each thing is done you can place a sticker beside it. Then if he asks to brush his teeth you can show him the chart and remind him he already brushed, he's all done, and leave it at that. Then see if he is better or worse after about a week.

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B.S.

answers from Houston on

I have two boys and both of them have gone through the time in there lives where brushing there teeth and washing hands is fun. How often does your son play in water? My boys loved if for the water play and because it is something that they could do by themselves. At this age nothing is set in stone. There are many reasons that kids want to do what they do, and OCD isn't catching. Yes, they may pick up on some of our quirks, but if you don't show them then it could be that they are just having a good time. Now, I worry when my 2 year old sees a dust bunny and gets out the broom to clean it up, but if he is OCD about cleaning I think, there could be worse things. I don't know if I would stop him from washing his hands or brushing his teeth because one day you will be yelling at him to brush his teeth before he goes to bed and he is telling you that he will do it in the morning because now isn't a good time. (That is my 5 year old)

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K.R.

answers from San Antonio on

I have two boys, now ages 8 and 4. They both continue to have favorite activities they obsess normally over. Each one lasts about a week and then they are obsessing over the next new thing. When kids learn something new, they do it OVER and OVER and OVER, no matter what age. My oldest son spent nearly two months blowing raspberries from dawn till dusk - his poor face was chapped constantly from all the drool... :)

Little kids learn with their mouth. They put stuff in their mouth to figure it out. And when they LIKE something, they want more and more of it. Perhaps your son just really LIKES the sensation of brushing his teeth. And since when is brushing teeth all the time bad? I have the opposite battle to fight - twice a day is like pulling teeth for my boys (no pun intended :) :)

It's hard to know how much to control our children's behavior. And it's hard to find that balance of teaching that their is an appropriate time for certain things (a schedule) and freedom to explore the world and discover all of its wonders. I'd suggest that you let him brush his teeth and wash his hands and practice any other healthy adult skill WHENEVER he wants. And save your parenting battles for something that is truly going to harm him. (i.e. not getting a nap, eating healthy foods, dangerous items) His future classroom teachers and his friends' parents will be grateful that he enjoys getting clean! :)

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D.L.

answers from Houston on

At about 14 months my son started using an actual toothbrush. He would carry it around for a long time, he loved it. I think he loved it more because it was soothing to his teeth that were comming in. Your son might have a few teeth comming in and the toothbrush feels really good to those sore gums.

Plus, like the other moms said, since when is it bad to have good hygine?

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S.O.

answers from San Antonio on

All of my 3 kids have done this to some extent. It's new and fun for them. I wouldn't discourage it too much. There will be a time when they don't want to do either. He probably isn't brushing too hard either, especially if you have a kid's soft toothbrush. Brushing too hard could cause problems, but I don't think you can brush too often. My 2 1/2 year old hates brushing his teeth, but loves to wash his hands and will do so every chance he sees fit. It's messy, but I don't dare discourage good habits. My husband has OCD. If my kids have it, then they have it. I will still not discourage good habits. It's when it becomes disruptive that balance needs to be established. Just focus on balance and practicality.

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M.F.

answers from El Paso on

I'm not sure if OCD is hereditary or not. My first thought for you to try is doing a daily chart and putting up stickers each time your child brushes teeth and washes hands - that way is all 3 spots are filled in for tooth brushing that day, maybe he will understand better - visuals and hands-on activities seem to help most kids. Good luck
Janie

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A.C.

answers from Houston on

Before labeling him, I would rule out other sources. Maybe he is teething or something and needs to rub his gums. He is not too young to get him to a pediatric dentist to be sure there is no other source of irritation. My daughter had a great dentist who knew how to get her to cooperate with the exam, giving her sunglasses and a mirror to hold and watch the exam and giving her a toothbrush, etc.
Linda C

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S.S.

answers from San Antonio on

It's normal for toddlers to be very enthusiastic about something, to the point that adults might call it obsessive. Kids that age are very much into repetitive activity - they find comfort and security in routines.

I can't speak for the environment in your home, but toddlers learn to perform if they know they will get a lot of praise for doing something.

Try slowly eliminating the hygiene episodes from his routine. Can you anticipate trigger points in his day when he's more likely to want to get up and wash his hands? If so, you can try altering your routine slightly to be busy with another activity that could distract him from feeling the urge.

You can also try simple re-directs, as in "let's play with trucks now, and we will wash your hands before we leave for the park." If he gets upset, give him a few minutes to compose himself; during that time, you start playing with the trucks.

Give each elimination at least several days -- longer if he's having trouble adjusting -- before taking another one away, and alternate between eliminating the hand-washing and teeth-brushing, so you're not taking too much away at once. If this is still an issue when he's a little older, you can explain that he only needs to brush his teeth after a meal.

Our pedi's philosophy is pretty simple: Does the behavior physically harm him in any way? If it starts to hurt him, he'll probably stop doing it. If it hurts him and he keeps doing it anyway, that's the time to bring it up with his doc.

Behavioral disorders are usually hereditary, sometimes environmental, but it's difficult and rare to diagnose much earlier than 5 y.o.

Good luck!

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C.C.

answers from San Antonio on

Yes, they can....I have a family full of people with OCD which manifested quite early. After years of working with the children and therapists, etc., going through meds with the kids, I decided just to go the natural route with the last child. She's 9 now, so it's getting easier as she can communicate her anxiety better. 'Just say no' and 'divert the attention'are our only means of dealing with this-----and it's working! It's been slow and very emotional, but I use lots of hugs and comfort time to let her know I understand and appreciate her efforts to control her thinking and actions.

I've worked with my dd on 'thought stopping', a component of rational behavior therapy, and that is very useful. Of course, your little one isn't old enough for that quite yet, but it's something to investigate and use later.

Best of luck!

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L.H.

answers from San Antonio on

omg!! my son 18 months old is the same exact way!! we have at least a dozen tooth brushes lying around the house so he can brush when he wants to. every time someone goes into the bathroom he thinks it's time to brush and wash. sometimes he will stand at the bathroom door and scream "brush teeth!" so i know what you're going through. my theory is if the kid wants to brush his teeth or wash his hands let him. because by the time he is a teenager he'll already be into good hygene and hopefully will continue to wash and brush. cause we all know how yucky boys can be!

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C.G.

answers from College Station on

I believe it is possible, though haven't heard of a lot of cases. when children are that young they seem to get "obsessed with any new idea, and that is probably all it is. Often with OCD, the obsession does not fit the compulsion, and the action is the compulsion. It is an anxiety driven disorder, and I find it hard to believe that an 18 mo old would be that anxious about anything, but my son who is now 15, was only 3 when they diagnosed him with bi-polar and OCD, so as I say I think it is possible. I think setting limits on the behavior might help unless it truly is upsetting him to not be able to do it. Often compulsions that are safe I would let my son go ahead with, hoping they wouldn't be replaced with others maybe not so safe. There are some wonderful child therapists in our area who do deal with issues like this. You might want to give them a call. I would be happy to give you the names of a couple that I know personally to be great. Good luck
C.

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A.L.

answers from Beaumont on

Does he use toddler toothpaste? My daughter LOVES the toddler toothpaste and just wants to eat it off the toothbrush! Maybe he wants a snack? And kids love to play in the sink with water too. My two year old acts kind of OCD too, like she has to have doors and cabinets shut- you can't leave them open! She doesn't care who is coming through, she'll shut the door! LOL But really, it may be a phase, or it may be serious. I saw the MTV "True Life" about OCD and the therapist recommended to the parents of this girl to NOT support her OCD. Don't give in to the toothbrushing and hand washing. Tell him you brush teeth 2 times a day and wash hands when dirty and that's it. I think if it is an obsession, you can break it. You definitely don't want to support it- and that's what you do when you give in. Good luck!

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