Can I Get on His Insurance Before We Wed?

Updated on October 09, 2011
T.L. asks from Phoenix, AZ
17 answers

Hey ladies, I'm engaged, and we've recently learned we are expecting our 1st child together...I have insurance through my job, but he believes his insurance is better coverage, and will cover the prenatal pkg, and birthing/hospital expenses at a lesser cost...

The problem is, the wedding isn't until Oct 2012; baby is due in May... I battled with negative feelings about baby being born out of wedlock, but came to the realization, that we love each other, we're grown, and we'll be married anyway... Not to mention, I really don't want to rush the planning of wedding, just because baby is on the way. This is my fiancee' first marriage, and he's got lots of family that has long awaited the possibility of his getting married. Since this is his 1st time down the isle, I think an initial courthouse wedding would dull the main event... You know, not be as special. I'm curious if anyone knows if I can get on his insurance before we Wed, or if we have to get married, before the wedding, in order for me to be covered on his insurance. Your thoughts, examples, experiences are appreciated.

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C.W.

answers from Santa Barbara on

The large companies I have worked for in the past 15 years have offered benefits to domestic partners, even same sex. Have him talk with HR.

2 moms found this helpful

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D.B.

answers from Charlotte on

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6 moms found this helpful
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M.R.

answers from Chicago on

Many companies will cover domestic partners. You have to prove that you are living together, and sign forms indicating you are, in fact, domestic partners. Many progressive companies cover this now. Have him check with his HR or Benefits department.

Some of the other posters have given a very conservative answer, it seems without much knowledge of the subject. I've worked in HR and in Benefits and I've never worked for a company or consulted for a company who did NOT offier domestic partnerships to be covered on their insurance plans. Granted, the companies I worked for were Fortune 500, not sure if your partners company is in a position to cover DP.

The fact is, there are many types of families out there, gay, straight, who choose not to be married for many reasons. Don't rush into marriage for the sole purpose of benefits coverage without first checking if his company will cover you.

3 moms found this helpful

M.B.

answers from Orlando on

No you can't get on his insurance til your married. And even then his insurance might not cover the pregnancy anyways, because some you have to be married a year before the cover pre-natal. I would contact the insurance and see how it works and if it's better insurance then you have then I would do a courthouse marriage to get on his insurance and have your real wedding when you planned. And for what it's worth I was with my husband 6 years before we got married and we have a 5 year old, so kids out of wedlock aren't anything terrible :)

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S.B.

answers from Redding on

This is a question for his HR department.
Many insurance carriers will cover a "domestic partner", but you have to follow the guidelines to qualify and have an affidavit notarized.
Also, there has to be a "qualifying event" to add new dependents onto a policy outside of open enrollment or the anniversary month of the employer group policy. For instance, the baby can be added effective the 1st of the month following birth provided you notify the insurance carrier.
Again, this is something that the HR department would be able to advise you on.

Best wishes.

3 moms found this helpful
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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I think we always had to show our marriage certificate when hubby started a new job and was filling out insurance papers. You have to be family to get coverage through someone else as far as I know.

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L.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

It depends on if his company allows domestic partners to be covered on insurance. If you are living together but unmarried you would be considered a domestic partner. My company covers domestic partners, however they have to pay the full insurance premium, it is not subsidized by the company the way the premiums for employees and their spouses/children are. He should check with his company to his what their policies are on insurance.

3 moms found this helpful

M.L.

answers from Houston on

I would just get married now to get on his insurance. You can still do something quick and special. I planned my weeding in two months and it was not just a courthouse ceremony. And no, you cannot get on insurance unwed, though some more progressive companies may offer it if you are living together and have proof. But in my experience, my husband's company always required a marriage certificate or we wouldn't be covered. The baby can be on his insurance when he/she born regardless if you are married. If you want further confirmation to be absolutely certain, then he can call his hr department or insurance agency directly and ask.

2 moms found this helpful

N.P.

answers from San Francisco on

When I turned 24 I fell off my father's health insurance and was uninsured for the first time in my life. I'd been living with my boyfriend for the past five years and we had always had intentions of getting married but always put it off because the thought of spending so much money on a wedding was distasteful to us both. We tried every which way to get me on his insurance but it was a no go. Only a marriage certificate would do it, so we both stayed home from work that Thursday and got hitched at city hall. It cost us $111 for the licence and I was able to be covered the next day.

EDIT: Tried the domestic partner thing. The "common law marriage" thing. We were not a same sex couple and the company didn't recognize common law marriages so for our situation it was marriage or nothing. Not that I'm against marriage. We just kept putting it off because we didn't want to spend the cash. When we realized we could just elope and forget about the expensive wedding ceremony and reception the decision was very easy.

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M.M.

answers from Washington DC on

Most insurances will want to see the marriage certificate. So to get on his insurance you would have to do the quickie wedding in a courthouse before the main event.
But I could be wrong so call his insurance company.

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S.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

He should talk with his HR person to get the details. I doubt that you would be able to get on before the wedding. Domestic partnership allowances usually only apply to people who can't get married (gay couples). You would be able to get on as of the date of the wedding, though, you don't have to wait until his next enrollment period.

I've known people that got married quickly, or did the courthouse marriage way ahead of their planned ceremony, just for insurance coverage. (And some people still insist we don't need health insurance reform...jeez...)

I planned my wedding in two months. Much less hassle and less time for family battles and stuff with a quickly planned wedding.

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T.V.

answers from San Francisco on

I'm curious why you have NOT asked your potential husband, why he has not asked his employer.

When anyone says, "We're Grown", it always gives me pause....Are you really grown?????

Is the new life that the two of you have created together more important than a splashy wedding?

Bottom line, some states have benefits for partners that cohabitate...this is mostly due to same sex couples in some states.

My wonder is...what are your and your potential partner's priorties?

Blessings...

1 mom found this helpful
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K.B.

answers from St. Louis on

yea you need to ask his company benefits person to know for sure, but at both of the jobs I've had in the past year, I've had the option of putting my "domestic partner" (either same sex or not) on my insurance. The insurance premium has to come out after tax, which kind of sucks. There are some stipulations like you have to be living together for a certain amount of time and able to prove it (i.e. lease or shared mortgage paperwork) or you have to have filed with the city/court that you live in as domestic partners, which is a process in itself. I think this is becoming fairly common, but I will tell you that it is not easy AND you might want to make sure they will even allow for your name to go on his insurance if you already have insurance through another employer. Both of my jobs only allowed it if you were to have lost your insurance coverage. Oh and if it's not his open enrollment period, be ready for some hefty charges on his end to cover the addition of you.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.L.

answers from San Diego on

I'm in Pharmaceuticals not HR. Our plan only allows for "same sex" domestic partners...otherwise you MUST be married.

I doubt his insurance will cover your pregnancy because it will be considered a "pre-existing condition". You need to talk to both HR departments to find out which avenue is the best for you.

1 mom found this helpful

L.B.

answers from Biloxi on

Call the HR department first thing Monday morning. Insurance varies from employer to employer. But, many will not cover an existing pregnancy - so it is something to check on first.

If they will cover an existing pregnancy, have a small Justice of the Peace ceremony then your wedding next year.

1 mom found this helpful

J.P.

answers from Lakeland on

Most insurance companies now have coverage for a domestic partner. I was on my hubby’s insurance before we got married. I kept my own insurance while I was pregnant (we weren't married yet either), it was just easier at the time.
I would also ask your man what kind of wedding he wants. This is my first marriage and second for my hubby and we agreed the court house was just fine. I am not one that likes to be the center of attention. My family (just my mom and sister) were upset, but I had to remind them that it was our day not theirs.

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☆.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

You will be covered as of your wedding date--no sooner. That's just life.
Stay on your insurance until his next open enrollment after the wedding.

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