I just wanted to add: put yourself in your cat's position. She's one-years-old. A housecat. From the sounds of it, she's never been out of the house before. She escapes out the patio door. Freedom! Exhilarating! Scary! With all the new sights and smells and sounds, yes, having daddy pounce on her from behind would frighten the bejeezus out of her. It would frighten the bejeezus out of me, too!
Not so very different from our wussy cat, Blue. He's three-years-old and totally a housecat. Hates to go outside. I finally, this spring, opened the patio door and just let the dog go in and out onto the patio(no mosquitoes or flies at the moment, so this works). Lo and behold, the cat actually slunk outside! I was so stunned, I had to take a picture of him standing on the patio! However, any little noise, whether from outside or inside the house, has him racing back inside the house like there's a lobster clawing his tail.
Our cat doesn't like to be startled or surprised, and holding has to be his idea, or there's no deal. I have a 9-year-old daughter and I'm constantly reminding her to watch the dog's and cat's languages. Their talking, their body postures, their facial expressions--all of it will convey how they feel and if they'll be open to interaction with you, the human. I remind her, almost continuously, that the cat is from a wild cat (the cervin, I think) and the dog is from the wild wolf; they may be domesticated, but they are never, ever, fully 100% "tame." We like to think so, but they're not.
I'm glad your husband will be okay. As long as you teach your daughters to respect the cat and its limits and preferences, you shouldn't have anymore problems with her.