Chores for an 8 and 9 Yr Old

I have a great friend who got her 6 and 5 year olds to do chores. It's explained here:

http://aboneill.blogspot.com/2008/07/ive-just-discovered-...

This way, allowance is tied to how often they do their chores, but it's still fair to the kids.

Hope that helps.

You know, you may want to consider paying more. I have heard that $1/year is a good place and if you're paying nearly $10/week per kid, you could expect even more. And with more money, they may complain less and do more. And with more money, it will be very easy to start teaching them about saving, spending and giving without confiscating all their hard-earned cash.

I have a 10 year old A 8 YEAR OLD AND A 7 YEAR OLD AND ANYTIME I ASK TO DO ANYTHING ALL THEY DO IS COMPLAIN AND A GET AN ATTITUDE. THE CHORES YOU HAVE DO SOUNDS ABOUT RIHGT FOR THERE AGES.

Here is a website that is great that shows what chores are appropriate at what age. I believe your girls are doing what is appropriate for their age. I have 6 kiddos, ages 8-2 years. And my 8 and 7 year old are doing the same thing your girls are doing...and yes, they complain...a lot! And you are way nicer than I, you give an allowance. My belief is chores are done as a family to keep the family organized and happy, money isn't needed. Money awards are for those times when they go above and beyond what I have asked. Like putting away the laudry without me asking them, or helping their sibling with a chore without me asking or them complaining. But everyone is different!
HEre's the website.

http://housekeeping.about.com/od/chorechart1/a/ageapprcho...

M.,

What you are asking your kids to do for chores is very reasonable. It is actually what I am asking mine to do at 9, and 7 yrs. old. My 5 yr. old has chores as well, but his are a little less involved. My children complain as well. But, that is what kids do. I just tell them that we are all a part of this family and that we all have to pitch in around the house. We are a team. We all make messes in the house, therefore, we will all do our part to help keep it in order. If they continue to complain, then I will give them an example of one of my chores, such as laundry. Doing laundry is not my favorite, but I do it because I love my family. I could easily not wash "that particular child's" clothing if they do not want to help around the house. Or I guess I could not fix dinner that night because I don't want to. When I say things like that, they seem to catch on and get moving.

Another thing that we do is we give the kids "commission", not "allowances". In the Bible, we are taught that if you work, you eat. If you do not work, you do not eat. This is in Proverbs. We always go back to the Bible when they are complaining. Therefore, our kids receive their commission based on the work that they do. If they do not do all of their chores that week, then they do not get paid all of their money. Just as if Daddy went to work and did not do his job, and just wanted to sit around and do nothing, then he would not get paid. And, if Daddy does not work, then Daddy does not get paid, then we do not eat. My children do not eat dinner until their chores are finished. It is a hard rule to learn, but it really drives the point home. They have only missed dinner one time. If the kids continue to have a bad attitude, then they will do their chore without pay.

If you would like to learn more about this, I recommend going to www.daveramsey.com. Look up the "Financial Peace Jr." Workbook. That is where we took our ideas from. It is great! We have also created a working spreadsheet for their chores for each child. Everyday, after they finish their homework, they will check their chore sheet and do that day's chores. We only give about 2 chores per day for the older two kids, and then 1 chore per day for the 5 year old. Making their bed and keeping their room clean must be done everyday. If you would like to see our spreadsheet, I would be happy to email it to you.

Also, we pay our kids $5 a week (if they complete all of their chores). They have 3 envelopes where they put their commission. $1 must go to giving (they give theirs to the church), $2 goes to savings (they save towards something specific that they want), and $2 goes towards spending on whatever they want. Sometimes they give more to the church on their own. Sometimes they save more. It is neat to see how their little hearts and minds work.

Don't get me wrong, they do complain sometimes, but in the long run, it will be worth it. You are teaching them valuable skills.

$3 is, in my opinion, too little. i have a 5 year old - we are starting her on $5/week and subtracting $0.25 for disobeying/talking back/etc. at the end of the month we are paying her and she is to divide it in thirds - save, donate, spend. we just started so we will see...

I have a 15, 10, 7 & 3 yo. ALL of them have chores - even the 3 yo. I have the chores split up by days Mondays = Kitchen. 15yo = unload, counters, sweep, mop, baseboards; 10 yo = load, sink, fridge, stove, oven, trash, 7yo = table (set & clear), windows, microwave, door. 3yo helps with table, dishes & counters. Tuesdays = Bathrooms/Foyer. Wednesday = Living Room/Back patio, Thursday = Formal Dining & Living, Friday = Game & Toy room. They also have Daily Chores; Make Beds, clean bedroom, come kitchen chores (dishes/trash/table), Pets. The older 3 also do their own laundry (the 3 yo helps sort socks).
They do complain somedays but on average it takes less than 1 hour for them to do their chores.
There is a book that I read called 401 ways to get your kids to work at home by Bonnie Runyan McCullough. There is a section in the book that breaks down what your kids should be able to do at each age as well as ideas to get your kiddos to work.
For the past year we have also used the "Goblet of Choice" (an idea I read about in a Family Fun Magazine). We decorated a plastic Margarita cup with fake jewels and the child who behaves/helps out throughout the week wins the Goblet of Choice. They earn points by being respectful of eachother & eachothers belongings, being polite, getting their chores & schoolwork done on time, etc. (Kinda like the House Points they earned at Hogwarts in Harry Potter). Points can also be taken away. Whoever wins the Goblet of Choice, gets to choose the menu for the meal on Saturday, and the family activity (make sure you set up guidelines for this or they might end up saying they want to go to Disney... lol). We usually play boardgames, go on bike rides, go out for ice cream or a movie...
Another thing we have used is the "Allowance Checks" I picked up a packet at mardels. You can write the chores (like on a chore chart) and check them off when their done. At the end of the week I give my kids the check. (We seldom have cash around the house). The kids keep their check and turn them in when they want to buy something. My kids can earn $10/week ($2/day/M-F) <Daily chores are required - therefore do not earn allowance.>
K.
mansfield

No you arent asking too much- I would make a list- visible for all - If they do the chores they get the money if not- fine just dont give them their money and when they want to go somewhere or want something special ck and see what money that have of their own- lol they will change their mind quickly- But a visible list and leaving it up to them usually works. However my kids always had a hard time with mop and vaccum - that might be a bit much- I would leave that chore to their room exclusively-also let them put away their own clothes and have them down by the laundry for you. Also- when you do see your son eveyr other weekend- he needs ot have jobs as well or they will get resentful of him.
D. S

Sounds like they are doing the housework for you. IT is too much for their age. To take turns helping with the dishes, and setting the table when you eat is great, and taking care of their own animals also. But the rest could be a family effort of once a week house cleaning where you all pitch in.

My husband and I adapted an idea from Dave Ramsey (great speaker on becoming debt free, google him). Ramsey calls it commission. My three year old misunderstood and says he wants, "to do his 'missions." Cute, but I'll get back to the point. Instead of an all or nothing $3 a week. You break that down by chore. Remember to keep in mind how many times a week they should do it. Say you expect them to clean their room every weekday so that's worth a quarter each (potential $1.25/wk). Setting the table (maybe $0.50 a time because they split the responsibility and don't each do it every day). Etc. Make it add up to about $3 a week each. This means if one does all the chores they could make more than the other that week. A little healthy competition never hurt anybody. We made up a chart on the computer and got it laminated. I can email it to you if you want, I did it in Microsoft Word. It's set up for two because I didn't want to redo it when my daughter gets older. My son gets paid every day because he's three, but you could tally everything and pay once a week.

Then, if they ask for an extra toy or snack at the store, you ask where their commission money is. You start letting them buy the extras. If they want that extra hair thing at the mall, they buy it. You get the necessities and the birthdays and let them earn all the rest. If one has done more chores, they may be able to afford something and the other may not. Let them learn that if you want to keep up with the Jonses you've got to work for it. No loans from the "Bank of Mom." It's a great life lesson for the future. Dave Ramsey even suggests when they get older, letting them have more commission (enough to cover clothing purchases that they will need that season), then let them budget and purchase what they need. This requires some coaching about need vs. want. However, you may see them choose different stores and racks to shop off of if they have to budget for themselves.

PS. Here is a list of chores for different ages I got years ago at a conference. My three year old can do half of the things in the 4-6 range and most of the things in the 2-3 range. Each kid is different.

Helpful tips for teaching your children home management at any age: From "Neat Moms, Messie Kids":

“Kid power is the largest untapped source of energy in the world today”

Ages 2-3:

Carry things for you; run errands around the house
Pick up toys
Get out and put away diapers
Put soiled clothes in the dirty clothes hamper
Help unload dishwasher
Help set the table
Feed and water pets
Help put groceries away
Play house “sweeping and vacuuming”
Take off bed sheets
Get out and put away shoes

Ages 4-6:

Wipe tables and counters
Help make beds
Put away clothes
Carry things to and from car
Take clothes out of the dryer
Clear some dishes from the table
Fold towels and wash cloths
Help in simple cooking skills
Water plants
Put clothes in proper light or dark clothes hamper
Help with vacuuming, sweeping, and dusting
Help with younger children in the family
Work in yard and garden
Wash the floors with help
Put dishes away in dishwasher
Help wash and dry dishes by hand
Measure soap and start dishwasher
Empty dishwasher and stack dishes on counter
Hang up towels and washcloths after baths
Fix self simple lunch

Ages 7-10:

Keep room neat
Put clean laundry away
Help wash and vacuum car
Wash dishes
Read and follow simple recipes
Do simple meal preparation tasks
Run washer and dryer
Help change sheets on bed
Help with projects around the house
Take out trash
Establish personal hygiene habits, (bathing, brushing teeth, hair, etc.)

Ages 11-15:

Clean bathrooms once a week
Clean closet and drawers
Baby-sit
Plan menu
Buy groceries for menu with help
Cook simple meal plans
Begin baking
Wash and wax the car
Mow lawn

Age 16-18 (plus all of the above jobs J):

Run errands (by car if have license)
Manage cash flow, banking
Shop for groceries and clothes
Maintain the car
Be able to manage house, car, and yard by delegation when needed
Offer good advice in family discussions and problem solving
Organize his/her move to college

One thing to think about...have you trained them in these chores? It is so easy for a mom to say, "Clean your room!" and then the kids go in the room and don't really know exactly what to do.

Make it fun! Clean their rooms with them for a certain period of time. Have "cleaning music" that you play loudly during chore time. Run around and dance while you are doing it. Make it a race...."We have to make our beds. I am going to make mine faster then you! 1-2-3-GO!" Have a starting point and run like crazy.

Do not nit-pick. Compliment and teach. Do not allow complaining. When they complain, explain to them that you will have to add another chore or give them one of yours. That will nip that in the bud, especially once you carry through. Have rewards for doing things cheerfully.

Sometimes, just to be silly, I give my boys a "magic pill" that is really a jelly bean or a gummy bear. I yell, "Chore time!" and line them up and explain that their magic pill will help them work faster. They open their mouths like little birds, I put it in, and we run start our chores.

Sing songs while working together. Train-train-train. Then have a fun time. "We finished faster than yesterday! Yippee! We have time to play jenga." Or something along those lines.

As for the difficulty level of your chores, my 8 year old does much, much more. We live on a farm and he does all his household chores plus hard labor outdoor chores. The key is that you have to add enthusiasm and fun to it, and you have to TRAIN it and not expect them to know how.

Here is an example. When my middle son was 2&1/2, we decided he needed to start setting the table. I took manila paper, drew a plate, fork, knife, spoon, and cup in the correct size and laminated them. I would put them on the table, then get out what he needed and put it down low. He would carry each thing to the table and put it on the right spot. By the time he was 3&1/2, he just needed one sheet on the table as a reminder. By the time he was 4, he made the table perfectly with nothing to show him how. Now he is 7 and is helping to train his little brother.

Good luck!
V.

My son who is 7 years old feeds & waters our rabbit (our 4 yr old does the same thing in the morning). He also puts away silverware from the dishwasher, he vaccums his own room, he cleans his own room, he makes his own bed, and he puts his own clothes away. Although he does complain about doing them, he does not complain when he earns his tokens at the end of every week and turns them in for computer time, phone calls, toys, & money. FYI, he also has a special chore on his chart about helping around the house every day in any way he can, it can be as simple as putting away the chairs or helping set the table, as long as he helps in some way, he gets to mark it off. You are not asking to much, keep up the good work!

M. Please!!

Girl my 5 year old cleans her room, helps vacuum and when we had a dog she would feed and water her.

You are the mother and you need to put your foot down. Tell them they can do it and get $3.00 or do it and get NOTHING!!! LOL but I'm serious.

My oldest who is now 16 was washing her clothes at 9.

One thing that helps is whenever my youngest does something good I tell her she's the best helper in the whole wide world. Or when she cleans her room I tell her she cleaned it the best in the whole wide world.

I think the chores you picked are more than fine.

Since 3rd grade is when the TEKS test starts, homework increases, and extra-curriculars are big, we opted for simple chores and a reward system as follows (b/c the sweeping, mopping, and vacuuming are a little much, in my opinion).

1. Make bed.
2. Brush teeth (AM and PM).
3. Brush hair (AM and PM).
4. Clear stairs (means picking up whatever we put there, including folded clothes, toys, shoes -- and then putting them where they belong).
5. Read for 30 minutes with an adult.

If she does them every day for a week (and we have a chart on the fridge where she can check each one), then she gets to pick her reward for the weekend -- between taking a bath in our jacuzzi tub or playing a board game alone with Mom/Dad (without her two little sisters). They're simple rewards that we can control - versus something like the ice cream truck that doesn't always come by our house when we need him to. They're also free, and they happen to be things that she really wants to do - so they've become privileges, not just something we do whenever she wants. (She earns them.)

And if she does everything for a month, then she gets to pick between having a friend sleepover the next month, or a "surprise." Our surprise will vary but may be any one of the following (approx. $15 gifts):

Webkinz
jump rope
CD of her choice (from Target, our favorite shopping place)
DVD of her choice (from Target)
manicure/pedicure (ok - this one would be a little more costly and saved for much later in the year as a little something extra special for the momentum she's built up in doing her chores over a long time).

Also, we call these responsibilities "jobs" instead of "chores." And... we have to set the example by making our own bed each day, etc.

Hope this helps!
C. B

They are old enough to do the chores that you are requesting, especially the ones that pertain to them, feeding their animals, cleaning their rooms, bathroom, dishes, etc. They can also help with the sweeping,mopping,etc, as long as they are not doing all the housecleaning and you are just "supervising" and not doing anything yourself. Be sure to try to make it fun, ask them which chores they prefer, some may like vaccuuming (which i hate), but not mind mopping or sweeping. Turn up the music, have a cleaning party! Be sure and have some free time too, though, so they don't feel they are cleaning all the time!

My 8 year old earns $5-8/per week... depending on how many times we have to tell him to do things and how much he actually does... I've been told a good standard is around $1 per year of age.

3$ is not too little. And you are not giving them too much chores. They are old enough to learn resposibility and that hard work pays off. Between my two brothers and I we had a chore chart. Chores for weekdays and special chores on the weekend. Every week we switched chores. There was vaccuming, dishes, sweeping, feeding the animals, cleaning the bathrooms, clear the table, regular house chores. If they complain then you should give them more chores or deduct from their allowance. Have optinonal chores like washing and vaccuming the cars, mowing the lawn, laundry, etc. for extra money. You will soon see that they will want to do these extra chores for money for the things they want, but you wont pay for. And as they get older you can add to their allowance, every year give them a 50cent raise or something.

BTW Back then that is why couples would have 6-10 children, so they could do all the work ;)

M.-
We have chores assigned to weekdays and do not give allowance. The girls know what days to do which chore. Many times I will politely remind them of what is expected after school. The key to our success has been including them in the discussion to assign and schedule the household chores. We tell the girls what time the tasks should be completed. With this little bit of empowerment, the girls rarely complain because they feel they have some control, they understand that everyone contributes to the household, and I am not harping on them to get things done.
My girls do have automated banks with ATM cards purchased from Target. When they have money from gifts, the girls are expected to spend their money first. They often choose to save their money for summer vacation or camp. So I receive few requests for additional "wants".
When we started this plan we did have some complaints because no one wants to do chores. But the girls quickly learned "resistance is futile". Parents always win.
PS Depending on the size of your vacuum, this chore may be too difficult for their size.
Good luck.

I do not think you are asking too much, I grew up not having chores and not having to clean at all, I was the youngest of 5. I did not learn how to clean or cook, a problem for later in life. I would keep on them and stay strong.

I have 10 year old twins and they have been doing chores like that for several years. They also help sort clothes and start the laundry, fold clothes and put them away. They also help keep their bathroom clean. At our house we have a motto of if we work as a team everyone benifits. I don't give them an alowance but if we are shopping and they ask for something reasonable they usually get it.

Good Luck

What 8 and 9 year old wouldn't complain? You are doing a good thing in teaching them life skills and how to respect and care for their space. The money probably isn't the incentive that you expect, yet, because they may not yet see the value in it. Once they realize they can buy things they can enjoy, the incentive might be there. That being said, once they do learn the value, you are again teaching them a good life lesson. How to earn what you have. The only thing I would make sure of is that they are not only doing chores and they have time to play also. Other than that, you seem to be on the right track. Kids need to realize that in life you do have to do things that you may not always enjoy.

for an 8 and 9 year old I do not feel those or asking too much. My 4yr old makes her own bed, cleans her room, and helps to set the table. She also dries dishes while her older brother (18) washes. FYI, my two oldest (now 19 and 18) were doing their own laundry by the 4th grade. They would take turns. One week he would do the laundry while she cleaned their bathroom, and the next week they would switch.

Denie

hi M.,
i remember when i was that age, i had just about the same chores. I also played the piano so i wasn't allowed to go play with friends until i had my 30 min practice done. I had to vaccum,clean bathroom,sweep,mop,dishes,clean up after dogs outside,clean room. I had 2 brothers and we usually did all these on rotation with a chore chart. My friend has a chore chart as well for her 3 girls and they collect stars...at the end of the week they get to go to their fav store and get a toy or something of their choice depending on the amount of stars they've collected. So, i don't think its too much to ask of your kids...i firmly believe that kids these days are getting lazy and its our responsability to teach our kids to take care of themselves so when the time comes for them to be on their own, they can do it!! :) Hope you get it worked out...we didn't get an allowance so i guess you're already ahead the game!! :)
S.

Way to go for teaching your kids to be responsible and help around the house! They will be strong independent adults. The complaining is some what normal. However, I would deal with it. Kids aren't used to working and we all know how "fun" it is at times! What you are having them do is perfectly reasonable for their ages. Encourage them to make it more enjoyable by listening to music or a book on tape while they work or plan something fun afterwards. This helps, but sometimes you just have to get it done! Keep up the good work!

G. V.

My 7 yr old son has no problem doing those things. He makes his bed, vacuums, gathers the trash from the rooms, clears and sets the table, and cleans his room. He doesn't get any money for doing these things. If I give him money it's because I want to. I have a Dr. that told me kids should do their personal chores for free and do extra things that you do but are easy for a set amount. Sort laundry, unload the dishwasher, water plants, dust, clean mirrors, fold simple things like towels, pick up all loose things in the living room and put them away, put up their laundry that you've folded, things like that. Kids are smart and if they can do less for more they will.

You are not asking too much. Check out Dr. Phil's website. At one time, he had a list of compatible chores for particular ages.

Your children are probably saying none of their friends do chores. My response would be you are preparing them for their future. And do not back down. Three dollars a week for that age is great. Tell them you also supply them with electricty, food, chauffering, clothing, videos/dvds, etc.

If they do not want to tend the animals, get rid of the animals. I know these are part of the family but if the children want to eliminate animal chores, get rid of the pets.

Heck, I would make them start doing their own laundry! Then at around 10 years of age, have them start ironing their own clothes/changing the sheets on their beds.

Hang in there. If they call you a meany or whatever, say thank you and do not give into their wails of whoa.

Your list is definitely not too much. Kids will complain. There are a couple of things you can try to lessen that. First, I would make sure they understand what is expected. This may take you working with them. Show them how to scrub a tub or mop the floor. Some jobs may need to be broken down into several steps. (Instead of "clean your room", "let's pick up your toys first and then we can take care of the books.")
Teach them that there are consequences for not finishing. ("You want to go to the store with me? I'd like that but, I noticed you hadn't finished your chores. Maybe next time.")
We've not always had an allowance tied to chores. Kids should make a contribution to the family just because they belong to the family. On the other hand, a reward system is valuable. Right now, we are using www.handipoints.com. It's a customizable, online chore chart. My kids work harder for time than money. (Mom and Dad time or video game time)

Honestly, I think your girls are just complaining. My 3 & 4 yr old do most of those things(not vacuuming). They love to try to help vacuum, sweep, & mop too. Stick to it, they need to learn responsiblity!

At 9 my daughter started loading the dishwasher, helping fold clothes, sorting clothes, feed her dogs, and clean her room with help from us showing how to do it the right way. She is almost 11 and does it all on her own now. She vaccums and helps with her brother as well. I don't think it is too much what you are asking them to do.

I remember doing chores as a child, so I called my Mom to see how old we were when we started and she said 5. They made a list of things to be done, laminated it and once we completed the task we were to check it off. She said that as more chores were added there were certain chores to be done daily and certain ones were to be done on say Monday and Friday. Again these items were checked off. The only way we could receive an allowance was if all things were done and done on time with no complaining. If the chores were not all complete then we missed out on something. It seemed to work for me and my two older brothers.

Our chores were: dishes, vaccuum, sweep, empty trash cans, dust, make beds, feed dogs, and pick up our room.

The only thing I would think that may be hard out of the chores you are asking is mopping. Other than that I think you are right on!

Best of Luck.

Hey there M.!! I have 2 kids and they are 10 and 7. I try to make the most of their capabilities, and use it to teach them independence which is what you seem to be doing as well! GOOD FOR US! Well my 7yr old doesnt "like" doing the dishes. Especially when she is told to do so while she is in the middle of her play time. That is the same reaction I get from my 10 yr old son when i tell him the trash needs to be thrown. Every kid who can do it once should be able to carry on that responsibility. My kids have asked why THEY have to do this or that.. and i simply say, "because we have to take care of our family. Being apart of the family means taking care of eachother in any way we can." I went down the list of things I do just around the house in order to get dinner ready and they dont argue that they have too much to do any more.. lol.. I always thank them and let them know their help is appreciated when i tuck them in. But before, every day it was still kind of a battle. However, now when i remind them, they just gimme the *sigh* and shuffle over to get it done. So what! We mothers dont jump up to the idea of chores..right? i believe you are doing your motherly duty of teaching your children responsibility and independence.
Kudos to you!

wow i have a 9 yr old boy that i can not get to do very much

They will complain no matter what. My 5 year old will set the table, and clean his room way better than the 7 year old. But the 7 year old will sweep, mop or vacuum like a crazy person. I think you have asked for reasonable chores to be done.

My 9 year old daughter and 6 year old son and daughter, make their own beds (when I remind them) and pick up there rooms every day. This includes the game room. On the weekends, they all help w/ laundry. I have them empty the dryer and place the clothes on the sofa. I started by teaching them to fold wash clothes and now they fold all the towels. They also sort the clothes and put them away after they are folded. The youngest can not work the hangers well yet, so they sort the socks and underware while my oldest hangs up the clothes. I am in the room the entire time helping and supervising. They all vaccum their own rooms and take turns in the living room/game room. They also take turns helping me to unload and load the dishwasher. I do not have them fully set the table, but they do help to get the plates, cups and silverware out. I placed the plastic plates and cups in a bottom cabinet that they could reach. They also take their dirty dishes to the sink. This is all done w/out an allowance.

Hang in there, they are just being kids. My 9 year olds list is Her Bathroom, bedroom, her laundry, vacumming and dusting, loading the dishwasher. We still have to "nag" about getting it done. When her Older Brothers are home we still have to "nag" at them also. There is always something more important or fun to be done! When my 22 year old comes home on leave from the Marine Corps my house turns upside down as sea bags, back packs and duffel bags explode everywhere. There is no telling him I'll pay you $5.00 to clean up your mess. *L*
Hang in there. They will get it!

I don't thinking asking them to do chores is too much, but you may be asking them to do chores that are too big for them.

First, make it easy for them part of the process. Tell them we all have to do chores, show them the list, break things down. Maybe cleaning their room is too big of a description... try something like, empty all trash cans in your room, bring down your laundry on Friday, toys off the floor... as a starter. Something they can handle so they can succeed and not feel overwhelmed or confused by the result you want.

Same with the table, tell them forks, plates, cups on the table by 6 when it's your night and I may ask you to help me (emphasize 'help me') put more things on the table.

Whatever you ask them to do, you need a big chore chart in the kitchen where they can see it and you will probably need to remind them to look at it. They are kind of young, still. Make it fun and cheerful. They're helping you have more time for them. Not painful.

They need chores, but not too much or they'll get overwhelmed and just despise chores, which will make it harder.

i have an 8 yr old girl and a nine yr old son and they switch the laundry and fold and put away their own clothes and the towels. they also feed and water our 2 dogs and clean their bathroom and their rooms.... if they dont do it they dont get their tv and video game time.

I am planning to try and do what my mother did. She would have a list of chores on a piece of paper or card stock with amounts next to them. Anytime I needed money, she would tell me that I would need to earn it. I would go to the wall and pick out some chores. Those were more like dusting, washing windows, etc. Then I would have a base alowance of $5.00 a week (this was back in the 80's). I would get this for keeping my room clean, taking care of our dog, doing dishes, and anything else that my mom would consider day-to-day upkeep that I needed to help with. I even remember folding laundry. My dad had a lot of mismatched socks! Good luck!

This summer I sat my daughters (12 & 6) down and asked them to make a list of things they would be willing to do for $5.00 a week. ($3.00 is a great amount too) Then I took the lists and made a chart that had each item that was on their list. My oldest daughter's list looks like this-- Morning: brush hair and teeth, make bed, clean bathroom, sweep one room of the house (different room/rooms each day), help with laundry. Evening: brush teeth, straighten living room and dining room, clean room.
My youngest daughter's list is this-- Morning: brush teeth and hair, make bed, straighten living room (including vac.) and dining room, mop the room that sister swept, help with laundry. Evening: brush teeth and hair, straighten bathroom, clean room.
The catch is they had to do it all summer to show me they would be willing to do it for free before I started paying them an allowance. Also they have to check it off when they are done. Anything they don't do and I have to do for them, they have to pay me for. So when they get their allowance, they have to turn around and pay me for doing their work.

This may seem like a lot of house work for my little one, but she loves doing it. (Remember they had a say in the chores because they made that list) I also have to remember they are only kids and may not do them perfectly, but they are learning. I am very confident that when they move out on their own, they will already have more skills than some of their friends. Also, because they are doing it daily, it only takes about 15 minutes and they are done. Before this system, it would take me 2-3 hours to clean the house, because no one was helping clean the mess that everyone was helping make; but now they don't leave stuff in the floor as often because they are the ones helping clean it up.

You might want to check out flylady.net - she has some interesting things for cleaning and kids. Might help make it less "painful" for the kiddos, but heck, that's life. they're going to have to take care of themselves when they get older. They need to start now :)

I think the chores sound reasonable and maybe the allowance is too low. I pay my 8 year old $8/week minus $1 for tithing at church and $1 for his savings account. The rest is his to spend or save as he sees fit. If he fails (refuses) to do one of his chores and I have to do it, I make him pay me an ever-increasing amount for each time it happens. Once my price got to an uncomfortable level for him, he stopped complaining about doing his chores.

Good luck!

M.
"My son eats all his veggie now. Even the green ones!"
Visit my Mamasource profile to find out how we did it

I have a 9 year old and he helps with all of those same chores. They are not too difficult. Trust me.

My dtr is 7 now and we agreed to let her have a cat if she were to take FULL care of it. She has been doing OK.
I have cut slips of paper that has all of her morning and nightly routines on it. Of those, seven items are her 'real' chores.
Because they are simple chores like vacuum her own room and clean her own bathroom counter and feed & water her own cat she only gets $ 0.25 a chore.
So, she has the potential to get $1.75 a day and up to $12.25 a week. Her week starts on Saturday morning and ends Friday evening so she can get paid.
I know that sounds like a lot of $$ for a 7yo but she has yet to make half that!
She doesn't get paid if we have to constantly remind her and she doesn't get paid if she doesn't bring me her slip of paper before she goes to bed for the night. Last week she did most chores w/o being told but never brought me her papers. It's a simple way to get her to learn 'light' responsibility.

I give you this long story because maybe you could try this with your dtrs. More $$ is more of an incentive. Then they can see a goal for a future purchase.
The ball is in your court b/c you could play this several ways to get stuff done:
1) Divide tasks evenly and make it a competition to see who can make the most $$ daily (maybe an extra bit of change for doing better than the other). If your dtrs are competitive this will be good for them.
2) Make one big large list and whoever does the chore can initial it and that is who gets paid. So, if #9 only does 3 chores but #8 does 5, then #8 gets more money.

The work will get done. The girls will learn good competion as well as responsibility.
You could also throw in Reprimand chores like cleaning toilets or picking up dog poo or washing you car!

Feed & water the animals, clean their rooms, set the table & help with the dishes...sweep & mop??? Definitely not too difficult. Kids are always gonna complain about chores - even if their allowance is tied to the chores. I honestly don't think you're asking too much and those are definitely appropriate for the ages. And, as they get older, the chores should grow with them. By the time they're 18, a child should be able to wash clothes, run the dishwasher, cook - basically be self-sufficient. Be sure and include money sense chores, too - 10% tithe, 10% to savings. Just be consistant with the chores AND discipline. And, don't do their chores for them. After raising two kids - one very responsible, the other not so much - I wish I had been more consistant and insistant with the chores & discipline.

Good luck and God Bless,
Frances

You are not at all asking to much :) My 10 and 14 year old ,take out trash, Feed the cat, clean the litter box, help cook, do their laundry, clean their room, help with the little kids, basically we are family and we all help around the house, they are perfectly capable of helping out. You know what your daughters can do. They are big girls that are becoming more independent. This responsibility will be great for them. I don't give allowance but I do give plenty of thank yous and let them know how much I appreciate their help. I will occasionally treat them out to a movie and dinner.

You're not asking too much at all! My best friend just had this great idea for her family. She wrote out chores for each person on a pretty piece of paper and at the top she entitled it Kirstyn's Chores for her daughter and then listed out what they were to do each day. Then she framed them and has them sitting all together in her breakfast nook. She broke them down for each person. So, instead of thinking that she has to set the table every night for dinner, clean table off after dinner, mop, clean her room and keep her clothes organized....she knows that for Monday she only has to set and clean the table. Then Tuesday the same sort of thing. This has worked wonderfully for her family after YEARS of fighting with both of her kids. Let me know what you decide to do. Good luck and God Bless!

Haven't read the other post, but my son (turns 4 at the end of the month has to keep his room clean, he helps set the table, takes his dishes to the sink after meals (and other things as asked, like clearing some of the food - ketchup, mustard, things that won't break). He helps with laundry and helps vaccuum (I redo it if it needs more than just a random pattern vaccuumed into the carpet) and he helps clean his bathroom, including mopping up messes he makes - bathroom or kitchen. I don't think you're asking too much (we don't have pets, but he helps with his little sister), and if they get an allowance, dock from their allowance your pay for doing their chores (if they won't do them) and they will learn quickly that it's better to do them themeselves. We never got an allowance as kids, so it sounds to me like they are pretty lucky.

I dont think you are asking too much at all. Only thing I was not clear of is whether they have all of the chores everyday? That may be too much, but if not I think you are fine! My 9 yr old complains daily and I remember doing the same when I was younger. But they need to learn! Raise 'em right...as parents we're doing our best to raise them so they have all the knowledge and know-how to survive on their own!

This is what my son does. He is 9. I would have him vacuum, but we have wood floors that I keep up with. He gets paid $5/week
Daily:
Put up his clean laundry- I do a load daily-
Wipe down table after meals
Take recycling to garage
Clean room before bed

Sunday:
help daddy Mow yard
Monday:
change his sheets
Tuesday:
Sweep dining room/table area
Wednesday:
pick up toys in loft/on stairs
Thursday:
pick up dog doo in backyard
Friday :
clean his bathroom
Saturday:
clean downstairs bathroom

I can't tell you if that is too much for your girls, but I have a 9 year old boy. His chores are to clean his room and bathroom. I made a check off list for him so he will not be confused on what to do. Ex: make bed, pick up toys, put dirty clothes in laundry, stack shoes on shoe rack in closet, etc. I explained that this is his contribution to keeping our
household running smoothly and he is not paid for it. He vacuums and helps his little brother with his room, and empties the trash to earn $3 a week. Hope this helps.

i give 20.00 dollars a month and it keeps my son happy

At that age, mine had to help with laundry also. I grew up with maids, so I never learned the value of keeping clean. MY kids know! I have mine participating better by having them complete chores before the fun stuff and then I STICK TO IT (hardest the first time!)

I had chores when I was younger. I was not rewarded for helping around the house. My daughter is 9 and she has chores. She does not always do them without being told. She is supposed to pick up the living room, empty the trash in the bathroom, and keep her room clean. I do not give her an allowance but she usually gets what she wants. I just want to show her that mom cannot do it all by herself. I work full time, go to school part time, and have her and her almost 2 yr old brother to look after. So, in the long run I hope she sees that she helped her mother so when she becomes a mother than she can remember everything we did together.

You are not asking too much of your kids. Keep in mind if kids don't like something they complain. Your daughters are just being normal kids, stand strong. Remember when you were a kid and you did your chores.

I have 3 10 yr olds. I can tell you this is less than I asked my kids to do at that age. Kids are natural complainers. I do ont know any child or adult for that matter that likes chores. You will also find they do some chores better than others. I decided that my children do all the chores in rotation. This makes sure that they will know how to do them all once they grow up and move out. They get mad but it is all for a good reason. I don't pay allowance. We have sticks that the kids pull their daily chores. On some of teh sticks I have added fun stuff like get a soda today, get an ice cream cone, pick the movie tonight, and more stuff. This keeps them motivated.

My children are 2,4,10 and a 11 year old stepdaughter and they all have their own choir they do every week plus chores they always do together. With my 10 and 11 year old I have the do dishes, vacuum, clean up around the house. Chores are great for children to learn because you want to teach them values of keeping their house in order when they are on their own. They will complain here and there but they have to learn these things. I tell my kids when they grip " you think I enjoy cleaning? I do it because I have to and I want to keep our home nice". They actually changed their attitude because knew I am human too. My 10 year old loves helping me clean and does things without being asked all the time now. She sees me trying hard keeping everything up. You are doing fine! =) The only thing I wouldnt do is pay them unless it was off the wall chores like washing the car, cleaning garage, mowibg ect. I had to do different house chores when I was that age and and having my own family now I want my house to be clean and my children to do the same. I am cleaning through the whole day and considering that most of its their mess, the help is very much needed. You are being a great mom because you are showing your children responsibilities so try not to feel bad. They need this structure. I hope this helped:) Have a great day!

I love it! I have 2 boys ages almost 8 and 6. They are given no chores during the week, however they are to make their beds, hang up their pajamas, and put their dirty clothes away. On weekends they have 2 chores each. Such chores could be watering the plants, cleaning the bathtub, sweeping the floor, taking out the recycling, weeding, raking leaves,matching socks and simple folding. During the summer they have 2 chores daily and 1 on the weekend. There is certain behavior that will result in additional chores. To balance it out a little, I also assign worksheets which are tallied up one day and done the next. That way, how much work they have to do depends on them. I help them a lot with whatever, but don't let them slide either.
Make sure your boy does something. It's part of being in a family.
Life is hard, taking responsibility for your actions is lost value. Learing to balance school, chores, activities and playtime are good skills to learn.
By the way my boys do not get an allowance. They understand that we all pitch in to make a home we can be proud of. B.

When I first read this post, I had to recheck the ages to make sure..First, at this age children are going to complain about having to do chores. You are good in that you are laying the foundation for getting paid for the work you do. Having your girls help with "their" pets and around "their" home should not be difficult for them if you lay the law down. My children and my nieces and nephew started doing chores at age 3. Depending upon their age was the chore that they were assigned. It has worked so much so that they now race to see who can get done first. Not only do they do chores in their own home but they are more than willing to help when they are visiting.

What I did when my children complained about chores and how hard they were, was to take away .05 to .10 from any money that they earned. It took twice of them complaining before they caught on and decided that it was easier to do the chore and keep their allowance versus lose it.

Remember your 8 and 9 year old will be teens and if they are not taught that chores around the house are a part of life now then it will only be harder.

I don't have any children of my own (yet), but I can tell you that my mom had my little sister and I doing chores from the time we were about three. At that age it was a simple task of bringing mom the various small trash cans from around the house and helping her dump them into the big kitchen trash, and also picking up our toys. She made a daily/weekly chart and we got to mark off each accomplished task (probably where my love of lists stems from - lol!) Each year, we got to add a new, more age appropriate chore. We had a set allowance that had nothing to do with our chores. We were taught that we helped out around the house because that's people and families do to take care of themselves and each other. I've heard that some families like to pay for chores to teach that money is earned by diligence and hard work. I see both points. I think it just depends on what you decide is best for your household.

The task list you outlined for your 8 and 9 year old's sounds reasonable for me. I was doing those same things by that age as well. I also remember not liking it too much on some days, when I'd rather be doing my own thing. I'm suspicious that there's nothing too demanding or wrong about what you're requiring of them, and rather that they are just normal human beings that don't like to do what they know they're supposed to do some days like even us adults from time to time. ;c)

I personally do not think that those chores are hard. I think the kids just dont want to do them. My 12yr old has been doing the same chores since he was their age. His include, taking out the trash; make his bed; clean his room; vac his room every other week; clean the bathroom every other week; dry dishes. My 5 yr old has chores as well. He is responsible for feeding the dog; setting the dinner table; gathering trash from bathrooms. My oldest gets paid 5.00 a week if he completes chores with no problem. (we tell him that if we have to remind him, he will not get paid but will still be expected to complete the chores. My younger son gets 2.00 a week with the same rule. ALthough we remind him from time to time, because we did the same to the older one until he hit a certain age.

Kids are going to complain no matter what you ask them to do, because its not what they want to do. Mine complain all of the time, and it is a constant battle. We have a chore chart that I got from a teacher store and you use the wipeable marker on it(forgot the name). So therefore, they have no excuse to say to me what chore do i have today. Good luck!

My son is 11 and my daughter 9. They are responsible for their pets, 1 dog and 2 cats. They take weekly turns in feeding and watering them. My son is responsible for mowing and weeding the yard. My daugther has poop duty for all the animals. One sets the table, the other clears the table both load the dishwasher and empty it. They are reponsible for bringing their laundry down to be washed and they are to help with rotating, folding, and putting away. My son will even get the dinner started if I leave out the instructions. I started this when they were your childrens age and I don't pay them, I don't get paid for being their mom. At first they needed more supervision but now they are very self resilient and they love "bragging" to others how grown up they are. My son has even started to mow neighbors yards and he loves the cash he makes.

Hi M., I don't think you're asking too much at all. I also don't agree with paying or bribing your kids to do chores. My kids started doing chores from a chore chart in kindergarten. They don't get paid or get allowance (unless they do a big extra job such as cleaning out the car or raking dog pen). I have always told them that it takes a whole family to live in a house and a whole family to help take care of the house. One suggestion I do have is switching up the chores some so they don't get bored with the same ones over and over. I have a white board divided into 2 collumns with 6 rows down. Each day I write 6 chores down one side and the kids place their picture magnets one at a time (alternating kids) down the other as they pick chores. One kid picks first Mon Wed Fri, the other picks first Tue Thur Sat and Sundays we all take the day off. They don't pick all 3 chores at once, the kid that picks first picks one then the other kid picks one, etc. This allows me to only list chores that really need done that day and allows them to have some say in what they do and also to do different things each day. Also, I save the big, longer chores such as cleaning their room, picking up the yard, or watering the outside dogs for Saturdays when we all have more time. Some of their daily chores include feeding dogs, dusting living room, put away clean dishes, wipe down bathroom sink and counter, sweep bathroom or kitchen, wipe table and chairs, etc. I also buy things to make these jobs easier for them such as a swiffer that they can use between my mop days, dust rags that they can use then throw in the hamper, a small hand broom with dust pan to use to pick up the dirt pile easily after sweeping with the big broom.

Keep up the good work of requiring chores. Also, show them that with everyone pitching in the work gets done faster and then you can all play a game or go somewhere together. Don't let them manipulate you either, if they whine try ignoring it, if the whining gets too bad assign them an extra chore...that punishment usually only happens once before they learn to shut the mouth and just do the work!

M.,
Check out www.handipoints.com It kind of reminds me of the famous webkinz website but it is for chores. I give .5 cents per mommy point and when they have reached 100 points...I pay up. It's really fun! I have a 7 year old and I thought this would eventually "die off" but she is constantly on the computer looking up what chores she is to do next....best of all? It's FREE!

Good luck, you are doing her a favor (and their future families)!!!
M.