Circumcise

Listen to H C! If at some point it becomes medically necessary, that is one thing. Otherwise, let him join the ranks of the majority of men in the world who are not circumcised. We have a daughter, but if we had, or if we end up having a boy, we will allow his genitals to remain intact--in spite of the fact that my husband is circumcised.

If he hasn't had any issues at this point, he will probably be fine.

Good luck with this decision.

Dad here so understand that in terms of my opinions...

First of all, WAY TO GO on choosing adoption!

I am circumcised, our son--whom we adopted and at birth--is not. At least you're not using that ludicrous "he won't looks like dad/brother/uncle Tim" argument. (Soap box alert--if dad only had one arm does that mean Junior has to have his arm lopped off?)

No, circumcision is not *medically* necessary at birth unless there is some sort of penile/foreskin defect. Our first pediatrician (in New Mexico) said that if a boy doesn't have *chronic* UTIs by age 2 then he'll be fine. Soap box again: one of my favorite things to recount is that the UK decided to remove circumcision from the list of payable procedures covered under the country's national health plan. So doctors would still perform the surgery--and make no mistake, it IS surgery--BUT the parents would have to pay the bill! Yeah, the rate of circumcision plummeted to single-digit percentages the following year.

As for the hygine issue, the USA, Isreal and Arab countries are the only ones that circumcise on a wholesale routine basis. Penises are not falling off men and boys the rest of the world over! Besides, as I tell my friends...I've had to clean out fecal matter from our 4 month old daughter's vaginal folds just about every day compare with never when it comes to our son's foreskin. BTW you *do* know that you shouldn't even try to retract his foreskin at that age, yes?

You need not be concerned about him looking different than other boys. Many school lockerrooms have private stalls nowadays and even in the communal ones at school or the Y, boys are going to me more concerned about whose is bigger or who is growing more pubic hair etc. (Trust me on this) There will be less emphasis on who is cut and who isn't.

Parents Magazine, June 2008 issue, page 38
"Fifty-six percent of boys in the U.S. get circumcised, according to a new survey. But there are vast regional differences: Midwesterners and Northeaterners are more than twice as likely to circumcize their sons as Westerners." (The West includes Utah)
Circumcision rate by region:
Midwest 75%
Northeast 65%
South 56%
West 31%

My final soap box moment...as far as I can tell, he's perfectly healthy? No frequent (ie more than 7) UTIs last year? Well then why even consider the surgey? Better yet...are you also considering having his tonsils removed? How about his appendix? Unlike the foreskin, medical science hasn't fully understood the purpose and function of those organs.

Off my soap box. Be prepared for arguments both for and against circumcision. But really, IMHO the only argument for that I can see as valid is if it's medically necessary *right now* or for religous purposes.

I am a mother to two, healthy, happy, clean, intact boys. After reading up on information on all sides of the issue, my husband and I chose not to consent to circumcision for our sons. They are now 6 and almost 3, and we have had no issues with cleanliness, phimosis (overtight foreskin) or difficulty toileting. We do not regret our decision at all, and many other parents I've met have made the same decision for their sons.
I learned there is no special care required for an intact penis, and the boy himself should be the first person to retract the foreskin to prevent tearing of the tiny frenulums that attach the foreskin to the glans( kind of like the frenulum under your tongue.) As the foreskin gradually loosens it will retract easily by age four or five. Some parents worry about the little pearly white pieces that are revealed during the loosening process, but I learned it's not dirt, it's just the skin cells that are shed and they wash away, no big deal.
I also suggest reading the information at www.mothering.com, but there are also some other sites. Admittedly, they offer a case against circumcision, at www.intact,org and www.nocirc.org, I believe, so maybe they will seem biased to you. But honestly, afte reading everythihg I could get my hands on while pregnant with my first son, I started to see circumcision as a strange and painful cultural custom with roots in ideas I was not comfortable with. For example, my family isn't Jewish, so I have no religious reasons for circumcising. And since it was started in the U.S. in the 1920's as a way to stop masturbation (and was touted as a cure-all for everything from hair loss to eczema) I felt like it never has been a legitimate medical issue. Now we're cultural obsessed with cleanliness, so that's the reason we hear about most, even though being intact is probably cleaner. You might be interested to know that the American Academy of Pediatrics (which is typically a very conservative organization) no longer recommends routine infant circumcision. My own pediatrician's sons are intact, and he does not perform circumcision. He says for him, it violates the Hippocratic oath ("first do no harm") and removing healthy, functional tissue is not an appropriate surgery to him. It was also interesting for me to learn about the fuction of the foreskin--I'd always been taught it was merely "extra," but I've since learned that the glans of the penis is actually a mucus membrane and is not intended to be constantly exposed. It's like removing your eyelids and leaving the eyeballs exposed to constant germs, etc. I actually think having some covering over the glans is cleaner and healthier, especially in infancy with diapers and early childhood with sandboxes, frogs snail, puppy dog tails--you name it. It also preserves additional sexual function, as you will read about.
The procedure of circumcision is traumatic--a board with velcro straps called a "circumstraint" is used. I think a three-year-old is much too old to be subjected to that sort of trauma, even if he were under general anesthesia. Because it's important to build trust with your kids--especially your children who come to you through adoption--it seems to me like your son is too old for your to consent for him on this issue. It's his body; he could choose later, but if you celebrate his normalcy and wholeness, I doubt it will ever be an issue. The numbers in the U.S. for circumcision are dropping radically--ten years ago it was about 50 percent, but now it's even lower as more parents are questioning tradition for tradition's sake. Also--my first son was at a children's hospital for a couple weeks after he was born and all the pediatric urologists there recommended against circumcision. One of them has a son who is ciscumcised and a younger son who is intact, and the younger boy asked his older brother "what happened to you?!" So it's not the issue we might think it is. ;) That doctor said he told his boys that he was always learning as a doctor, and he always tried to do the right thing for his boys, and when he learned better, he chose better.
I'm sure you'll do what's right for your family. Good for you for wanting to learn more. Good luck!

You know, he's three and there is no medical need, why make him go through a surgery that is not everwhelmingly benefical?

America is the only country that routinely circumcised babies without religious persuation.

When you read your research, pay close attention to where the fact are coming from. Is there motivation to say one thing or another? You wouldn't expect an in-house study of Nissan to come back saying Nissan is substandard to other cars--it'll obviously come back saying Nissan is better and safer.

Circumcision, by itself, with only 3 a week brings in enough money to provide over $40,000 a year. How much do you make in a year? Consider this when looking at England's standard of circumcision; prior to socialized medicine when physicians were paid based on individual services approx 98% of male babies were circumcised for medical necessity, yet, by miraculous intervention, after the switch to socialized medicine, the rate fell to less than half of one percent. How could that be? All off a sudden the need for circumcision practically disappeared?! Yet we find no outburst of cancers, we find no concerning or alarming rates of infections for which the World Health Organization has intervened.

And just for perspective on infections: the average female baby is FOUR times as likely to contract a urinary tract infection than a male child with his foreskin...but nobody freaks out over little girls.

In the end, you need to trust your motherly instinct...it doesn't matter one wit what any of us say...for it or against it. What matters is your little boy. Does he have the right to choose to give up a piece of him or is it posing such an imminent danger that it must be removed for the safety of his health?

There is no medical reason to do it, I know you have a lot of response, but this is a hot topic and a decision and in the end it has to be your decision. I have 4 boys and 3 girls, and circumsion was never an option for me, doesn't matter that daddy wasn't done. Here are my reasons why (both sides)...

1. They will look like daddy....how many boys walk around looking at their dads penis?
2. It is better for hygiene.....so long as they bathe every few days what hygiene issue is there?
3. It is cleaner......once again a bath will take care of that.
4. Less infections.....statistically not true both sides have about equal issue chances, once again a bath every few days take care of it there is only a 1.8% difference.
5. Will be embarrassed as he gets older.... about, but not quite 50% of the population isn't circumcised.
6. Girls will find it gross...as you can see many woman don't have an issue with it, and if they did it is going to be a lot harder to pick a man who isn't and they could be missing out on the man of there dreams.
7. They won't remember something that happened at three or younger.....there may be no lasting scares, on the outside, but many people can remember that far back, especially if it is traumatic. Lots of molestation victims remember from that early on, even if it isn't a physical memory they are still traumatized none the less.

Here is a good sight to take a look at.....

http://blogs.webmd.com/all-ears/2006/08/circumcision-unki...

Whatever decision you make good luck!!

Oh, please don't do that. He is just fine and it will be extremely traumatic for him to go thru that type of pain at his age. Circumcision is not necessary at all- it's cultural. You can find people with opinions on both sides, but there really is not scientific evidence that it's hygienically better or worse (unless he has generally bad habits like not bathing for weeks). It's such a sensitive issue and he's not any more likely to have a problem than your other son. I say let him be and just love him!

Don't do it! I have a friend who was circumcised as an older child, and he was totally traumatized by the experience. If your son hasn't had any problems so far with infection, etc., I would say that it isn't a necessity. My son was circumcised at birth, and it was a difficult healing process...I would not have done it if I had known how much trouble it would be for him (and us). He is fine now, but it took until he was about 13 months old before the skin finally stopped trying to re-adhere. Save your son the pain and suffering and let him remain intact...especially because at age 3, he is used to his body being that way. You can teach him the propper cleaning techniques, and he will get used to bathing. Most other countries don't circumcise their boys. It is mostly done for cultural reasons in the U.S.

I have 2 sons, neither of which are circumsized. It has never been a hygene issue and my kids only bathe about twice a week, unless they are really dirty (like in the summer it's more often). There are glands that naturally clean out the penis when children are young and the skin should never be forced to retract. Sometimes it takes up to 10 yrs for the skin to be retractable, other times it can be done at 2, but you can cause major damage by trying to retract it. This day in age, alot of boys are not circumsized, i don't think he will have self esteem issues. We now know that circumsision is totally unneccesary and to put him through that at his age for image purposes is not worth it in my opinion.

I have three boys and none of them or my husband are circumcised. My middle boy- now 7 years old had a problem with chronic infections on his penis when he was about three. The urologist treated it for months, stressing that a young child does not need to undergo circumcision unless absolutely necessary. He said that there are more risks with have the circumcision done that is worth it and the boys are fine without this procedure. After several months of treatment, he was fine and the doctor said it was good he never had to undergo the surgery. My oldest is 12 and has never had a problem as far as "looking different" or having other problems. There are a lot of boys that are not circumcised these days, so I don't believe that will be a problem. They just need to be taught how to clean themselves properly and they will be fine. I don't recommend putting your son through the pain and possible side effects of the surgery if it is not absolutely neccessary. Hope this helps!

Listen to HC! He is right on. I don't even believe infants should be circumcised. To do so to a 3-year-old seems cruel and unnecessary. There are many good resources online and elsewhere that can guide you and your husband in caring for and teaching your son to care for his intact penis. Glad you asked this important question!

Hi K.,

My son is almost 18. We opted NOT to circumcised because God thought it should be there. Plus, my husband (I know he was kidding) said that he felt a lot of pain when he was circumcised as a infant.) LOL.
My boy has had no problems. Also, I think it is a help for a young man to keep himself pure. Not that it makes them self conscience but that they are special.
My hubby also says that he had wished that his mom and dad had not done that to him, as he would have more to have fun with. Men, I tell ya.

Hope that helps you to decide.
Cath

Circumcision is genital mutilation - your son will remember this for the rest of his life. If he chooses to do it for himself when he's older - great. I would not do this to him now or be prepared to face serious psychological issues.

My feelings are only my feelings and I know you will go with whatever you feel is right for your situation. I think you would damage this poor little guy by having the surgery. It is very painful and the older he is the worse it is. The extra skin is there for their protection. It is very common in all the other countries and all is well there. I decided to not have my last son circumcised and he is 7 now and all the fears I was told have not come true. He is different from his other 4 brothers and his father but when I found out how uncalled for this proceedure was I was not going to put another male through this process. I have not and will not regret this decision. I do regret going with the flow with my others and having them circumcised. What pain they had to go through and for what? Good luck!!

HC is right. My husband (US born) is not circumsized. The foreskin is there for a reason, as are your eyelashes and tonsils. Unless something is wrong why chop off something that was put there for a reason. As for Hygene, I'm sure women who are circumsized have a much easier time cleaning their vagina. The folds just get in the way, and trap all kinds of icky bacteria, right?! Yes, an uncircumsized penis take a little more care and cleaning. Yes, the foreskin can hold bacteria and make your son more likely to get an STD (but the rate is under 2%), but instead of mutilating is perfect penis, teach him safe sex practices and how to choose women. Afterall, circumsized men get STD's too.
When men walked around with their penis' out in the sandy, dusty climate of the eastern asia there was a necesity to circumcision, since there was not consistant access to cleaning facilities, it was is issue then. Do you have a bathtub in your house? Then he will be fine, and so will his penis.

We did not circumcise our baby boy. After reading up on both sides of this issue, it did not feel right to us. And we started to wonder if this was even our decision - to permanently change his anatomy. I guess I'm telling you this because as more people choose not to circumcise, the less parents will have to worry about the whole "looking different" thing. Kids are going to get made fun of no matter what body parts we consider removing. I've read some good tips on how to handle it when boys in the same family look different from one another. www.mothering.com is helpful for the argument against circumcision. It can be a tough thing to consider. Good luck with your thoughts.

A.

hi K..

my son is 15 and was never circumcised. my fam is jewish and I never even knew I had a choice about it until my midwife asked me if I was planning on it. in fact I thought penises just 'looked' like that, see how naive I was. anyway, when he was 2ish, he got an infection and we got that cleared up pretty fast. when it had passed I taught him how to wash himself. with all the bath play he did I can tell you he stayed very clean!! when he lapsed, I just had to say, 'remember how sore you were that time when you were a tod, you really need to wash your body' and we have had no problems since. like I said, he is 15 now and I asked him your questions. he said feeling different will depend on his personality. as for his esteem and looking different, he said nothing like that has ever been an issue for him or his friends. in fact now most newborns are not circumcised and so intact boys in the locker room are the majority anymore. he said its just not an issue and no body looks or cares really. he did say though that circumcision looks really traumatic and painful and he is glad he did not get put through that.

You have received a lot of info about circumcision. We chose not to do it with our now 2.5 yr old son and have had no problems (my husband is circumcised). I have a friend whose son had a problem with the circumcision where the penis would retract and get stuck. It was sort-of like it never healed. He is now 6.5 yrs and has had to have several painful doctor visits to have his penis extracted--pulled back out. (This included slight ripping of the skin each time!) Talk about traumatic! My opinion--DON'T DO IT!

As for bathing... children do not need to be bathed every night. If it is such a battle, make life a little easier on you both and do it every other night. My 2.5 yr old started liking bathing even more when we started taking swim lessons. Now he practices swimming in the bathtub. Or... let him/help him take showers. At three, there should be no pulling back of the foreskin for cleaning (that happens later and he should be the first to retract because he will stop if there is any discomfort) so really he just needs a once-over with soap and a head scrub.

Good luck with your decision!

My husband is circumcised but after we did some research when we were expecting our son we chose not to circumcise him.

After making the decision my husband has become more and more angry about the fact that his parents made such a big decision for him as a baby.

The reality is that in most of the world is not the "norm" to circumcise, and it is becoming much less common in the USA. In some states, your son would have more friends who 'look like him' (as if any of us really all look alike, anyway), than friends who have had the surgery.

Besides, at three, he could be traumatised. At least wait until he is old enough to make the decision for himself.

K.,

Very important topic. I am adamately opposed to circumcision- my reasons are; 1. it is not necessary, (Do you think your son is need of this cosmetic surgery? Since he has had no issues it doesn't sound like this would be medically necessary.) 2. it IS tramatizing to the baby (have you ever seen a baby being circumsized? It should be required that parents see the procedure at least once before making this decision, 3. I feel that it is not my decision to make. It is not my body and thus, IMO, not my place to make this decision on behalf of my son. If he chooses to get circumsized when he is old enough to understand, then it is his choice and I would support him. Just like I don't think it is my place to choose to have my daughters ears pierced- it is hers, her body her choice. I know that circumcision cannot be realistically compared to ear piercing, I am just trying to illustrate that it is a matter of principle and respect.
I would encourage you to quiet your heart and listen to your instincts. I don't think it is best to justify this procedure based on what someone else did or how someone else looks- your son is his own individual- we all have our differences, celebrate his individuality and when he is old enough to understand you can explain to him why you chose what you did.

This is a big deal and lots of questions should be asked before doing this elective surgery. IMO, the doctor should not be the only source of information, remember, they get paid to perform these procedures. I greatly respect those that choose to not perform this surgery unless it is medically necessary. Anyways, I could go on, but some information that I have found helpful in my research is: http://www.babyboy.info/birth_care.html & www.nocirc.org Also, mothering was mentioned a few times- this is an indispensible resource!
Good luck,
H.

Wow LOL! I almost feel silly responding there has already been so much posted I could only read half of them, however it is an important decision and I thought I would pass on what I know :) My son is not circumcised, and like one of the others said I didnt even realize it was something that was done lol. Anyway, both my midwife and my pediatrician were not recommending circumcision although they gave us the info to make the decision. My husband is circumcised and we were afraid he would think its wired being different from Dad, but he has never said a word about it and is now 9, also never had any problems with not being circumcised. When he was in head start (I worked there) for safety reasons the kids bathrooms didnt have lock doors and alot of times the boys would all go in together to use the bathroom and there was a mix of boy who were and boys who weren't circumcised ~ I dont think it fazed them in the least. I think in this age range it will be like 50/50 so he wont be odd or anything. Just learn how to take care of it and let him know. (send me a message if you want me to go in more detail, but your pediatrician can help too) I do feel it may be hard having it done now that he is three. I'm not sure how you can let him know its ok, and why its happening could be traumatic. Anyway, best wishes ~ hope it works out no matter what you decide.
S. :)

Please do not circumcise your 3yo. A good friend of mine had to have her son circumcised at the age of 2 for medical reasons, and it was extremely traumatic for him. He just didn't understand why his penis suddenly looked different and hurt so much. My son is circumcised, so I am not anti-circ, but it was done when he was a newborn. Neither of my younger brothers is circumcised, and they are perfectly normal, happy people, and it certainly hasn't negatively affected them. They never had any hygiene issues with not being circumcised. The only thing I would suggest would be perhaps having your pediatrician show your son how to properly clean under his foreskin. Good luck with your decision.

Hi, I have a 2 year old boy who is not circumsized. We talked to many people when making that decision, including our midwife at the time (we lived in Missoula, MT) who has an uncircumsized teenage boy. Apparently it is not as big a hygiene issue as the medical profession sometimes makes it out to be. Also, it is becoming more and more common these days for boys to not be circumsized, so it is not so different or uncommon as it once was...I figure if it becomes a big issue to him when he's older, he can have it done then. Hope that helps, and good luck making the decision.

Just my two cents...
We have adopted three kids, two are boys, both are circumcised (for some of the reasons mentioned here). Many opinions here, and it is up to you but I just wanted to add that one of my boys was circumsized at three years old and the very next day he was playing like he usually did. He did'nt notice it was different, he did know he had an ouchie there so he was a little more careful, but it certanily was not traumatic. He healed quickly and was not traumatized by it. He doesnt even mention it - he is now six.

K.,
We are from the US but live in the UK right now. My husband is circumsized, and so are our fathers, brothers, etc. We did not circumsize our 3-month-old son at my husbands insistenc. It is true that in the UK less than 10% of males are circumsided at birth. It's really a cosmetic thing, unless some kind of infection develops. Good luck with your decision.

My choice to circumcise at birth was directly effected by having several bad experiences with uncircumcised boys. The boy I nannied had one infection after another even though his mother was super careful and ended up needing one at 11 months. My roommates son had horrible infections and constantly smelled bad at only 2 years old even though he had a bath every night, a 17 year old friend had to have one when I was in high school and it was horribly painful for him. As an adult a friend's 6 year old had to have one due to infections and lastly my dad at age 65 had to have one due to diabeties. It was horrible for him. It just seemed a better idea to have it done when they wouldn't remember. I have never had a bad experience with a circumcised male although when I researched it I did read about some men with problems. As for the arguement that it causes loss of sensation, my husband says that getting a vasectomy affected him alot more than being circumcised.

I'm sure you've gotten more responses than you expected, but thought I would remark as well.
I have a coworker who has 2 boys who are now young adults. Neither were circumsized. One is okay with it and the other was not and he went in for a circumsision. All it had to do with was differences in personalities. Dad says if they did it all over again, they would make the very same decision.
As to the care for them when they are elderly - do you think in 70-plus years that elderly care will be anything like it is today? What was it like 70 years ago?
Like you, we wrestled with whether or not to circumsize our son, but we ended up deciding that it was his body and he should be the one to make the decision when he is able to.
Whatever you decide, it won't be wrong. It's all just a matter of preference.

Just a little note for those of you out there. My husband was not circumcised and we went for years and everything was fine then all of a sudden the forskin began to close up or shrink in on itself. It was very painful. He could not pull it back or clean it or have sex. He ended up getting circumcised at I think it was 45 but a side effect was erectial dysfunction. GREAT! who knew. Just so you know there are some medical issues other than cleanliness. Since we have been through this we have found it is quite common. So in a way better to do it now than much later!

Wow you got tons of advice. Just adding in my two cents here. Both of our boys were circumsised at birth(and Daddy too). We wanted them to look like daddy, but also there's the biblical sense to it if you're a religious person. We also asked a urologist about it and he said there is still medical problems associated with not being circumsised, that generally don't come along until they're older men. Personally, I just think it looks better. Whatever decision you choose is perfectly okay, but I would either do it now or never, I think once they get past about this age they would definitely remember it. I seriously doubt it will do any psychological damage.... people underestimate how well children bounce back from things.

My husband and his brother are both uncircumcised and turned out just fine. This is a personal preference, sometimes dictated by the wallet. It's up to you.

HI K.,
That same question was a debate when my son was born. We decided to do it because he was very little and would be a fairly easy procedure. And his father was. If you were to have it done now, it would involve alot more and be very uncomfortable for him. In my family it is mixed, my sister opted not to have her son circumcised. If you can teach him good hygene, he should never have a problem. I know one gal who waited until her soon was 3mo old and it was an ordeal, bandaging, anti-biotics and the works.
Hope that helps.

we decided to not circumcise because it is not medically necessary. it will help with hygiene later, if that makes sense, because he will need to clean it himself to avoid pain of there being buildup. It is of course, up to you, but doing it now that he is already a little older, i would say don't. How do you explain to a 3yr old why you're hurting his most vulnerable part? Most of the world is not circumcised, it is still relatively a high percentage in the US, but overall, he is not that much different than the other boys.... and if that is all the boys have to say to him in the locker room, that's a good thing! (jk)

Think ahead 20 years from now, do you think that HE would be wishing that he had been circumcised? I would definitely have him circumcised.

I don't have any direct experience with this...my son was circumcised right after birth. But my good friend told me her son was not circumcised at birth, and when he was in high school they decided to do it because he was feeling awkward about it as compared to most other boys. She said it was a very difficult experience and very painful for him...so I think it depends on the culture of where you live, and other family members. I think if he is the only one, or one of very few boys, who are not circumcised, he may feel left out or odd. If he's one of many, then he may not feel that way at all. And as he gets older, it will probably matter less and less (when he goes to college, he will probably meet many more who are uncircumcised, for example). I hope this helps...if you are going to do it, I probably wouldn't wait too long, as they become more and more aware as they get older. But don't worry--he won't remember any of the experience at all at this age.

My son was circumcised at birth and if I had to do it over again I would not have elected to have it done. In addition to all the problems we had (and things DO sometimes go wrong) I learned that it acutally desensitizes boys. Why would we want to do that to them?

whatever your choice is will be fine. people heal from surgeries. the doctor will help you know how to care for your son if you circumcise. ask for what type of pain reliever you could give him if you decide to do that too.

I am a mother of four and the two oldest are boys. I had my oldest son done at birth. My second son is my step son and his mother made three different appointments to have it done and didn't bother going to any of them. When we got custody of him I noticed that there is a very good reason to have it done!!! If it doesn't get cleaned every day it gets sore and has problems with yeast infections. The exwife didn't bother cleaning him correctly when he was with her.

I know what all the professionals say and I don't agree with them having seen both sides. The only downfall is that sex may not be as good when they are older, but really when have you met a male who needs to enjoy sex more??? The upside is that the problems of hygiene go away and you don't have to worry about yeast infections.

My son did really good in the surgery and the after care wasn't that bad. We had this done at three as well. If you choose to do this I have a couple pointers. Don't have him wear anything form fitting as much as possible. The ointment that needs to be put on works best if you get a tube that goes out fairly easily and put it on directly with the tube from a small distance. By not using pressure to put it on allows it not to hurt as bad. If your son is in diapers, buy a bigger size for the week.

It isn't that bad of an ordeal and truthfully my son is much happier having had it done. He looks like his older brother and father which makes him feel less different. He was fully aware of the hygiene problems and is very happy NOT to have to deal with them and the humiliation of his mother having to clean him so personally anymore. He instantly was a big boy who could take a bath and clean HIMSELF!!!

I would highly recommend this to anyone who is remotely considering it. My husband and brothers have mentioned that those who didn't have it done in school were very often teased.

Good Luck!!!

I have 4 brothers--3 circumcised, 1 not (more open-minded doc that time?) That one brother says he did not feel weird growing up with that difference from his brothers. He says there were other boys at school who were uncircumcised and it was a non-issue.

My husband is, my son (nearly 7) is not. We have not had any trouble teaching him proper hygiene. He knows how to wash himself, and does.

If his uncircumcised state develops into a problem, it can be dealt with at that time. Why put the boy through certain trauma in order to avoid vague possibilities of some future trouble?

Good luck with your decision.

K.,
If it were my decision to make, I wouldn't do it. In fact, according to what I've read, there is even no real issue with hygiene. Many men are uncircumsised and it is becoming more and more common in the US, to the point where it's something like half of US men are not circumsised. Good luck.

K.:

We adopted our special needs son at four years old, he was uncircumcised. He was pulling a lot on his private area and complaining about pain. He was having difficulty with potty training and wetting his pant a lot. I had him checked for infections several times and the tests kept coming back negative and still he continued to complain. The Urologist we spoke with was hesitant to perform this type of surgery on an older child and we had to really insist. No regrets, my son no longer complains about pain.

Ok, I have to chime in here. I have a nephew and he was circumcised at 2 years old. Due to his mother not being able to provide for him, the adoptive parents decided to have it done because of infection issues. You have received many responsed from - do it because it could cause problems later in life (like at 40) and don't do it because your son will have phycological issues (which I 100% do not agree with). Come on he is 3 and who remembers what their life was like at 3. Give me a break. This is my opinion, it is really up to you. It is more painful if they run into issues later in life. You have two other males in the family which have theirs done, so I think he will have a problem with looking different with his father and brother. If it was me, I would have it done. Once it is done, there are no what if's any more. This is a very contraversal issue so as you can see I do not agree with some of the responses you have received at all, but it really is up to you. He may never have issues for the rest of his life or it may cause him all kinds of problems. If you have it done, it is never mentioned again. Hope that helps! Good Luck and welcome!

It is really a personal choice- we chose not to with our son and through the years just practice good hygeine. We have had no problems at all. I couldn't see putting him through the pain if there was no medical reason to have it done.

Hope that helps.
C.
www.AHomeCareer.com

My sister adopted a sweet boy from Ethiopia and they decided to have him circumcised so he would look like Daddy. That can be an area where boys are sensitive about looks later on, locker rooms and all that. It can help if he knows he looks like his father and brother.

Hi K....
I wanted to share - I have twin boys who are 6 1/2 and are not circumcised. My husband is not- so he felt best that we didn't. His brother - who is 2 yrs older was circumcised.
It was not big deal that they had differences. His mom said that when my husband was born, they weren't strongly encouraging it - like they did when his brother was born.
Personally- if my husband was circumcised, I would still feel strongly about not having it done. Honestly, the hygiene issue is a personal one. They both get the same about of baths and showers. One of my sons does not have ANY issues at all. The other one has had some issues w/UTIs. The issues come more though with his chronic issues w/ constipation and with that comes the issues of backing up the plumbing in his urinary tract- which thus creates the UTIs. We are working to encourage him to drink more water and go potty more frequently.
SO...perhaps, if your son hasn't had any issues to date-it may be likely that he won't. Continue to encourage him to take responsibility of his body and educate why it is important to wash all areas of his body, drink plenty of water and go potty frequently!
I hope you can come to a peaceful decision on what to do...
J. - SAHM w/ a home based business and twin 6 1/2 yr old boys!

I am pregnant with my 2nd boy and I just asked a friend of mine, who is a very prominent MD, director of medicine St. Josephs hospital. He says do it for sure! He said because of the hygeine issues around it, etc. Men and the women they sleep with that are not circumsized are more likely to get sexually transmitted diseases. Not that our babies are going to ever have sex of course! good luck.

My husband is from another country where circumcision is not the norm. He has never had any health problems because of it. We had no religious reasons for it and the doctors said it wasn't medically necessary, so we didn't see any reason why we should have our sons circumcised. And frankly, I prefer the uncircumcised look. My boys have never had any problems because of not being circumcised.

Hi K.,
My mother in law is a urologist and when we were debating whether or not to circumcise our son she recommended it highly saying that it becomes a real problem when men get old. She's circumcised 70 yr old men before! Also there is a rare penile cancer that only effects uncircumcised men. With is dad and brother both being circumcised I think that it would be a good idea for health reasons and to not create confusion wondering why he is different. I hope this helps and good luck!!

K.,

Honestly, I have no issue with circumcision (my son was cirq'd at birth), but I think because he is advanced in age that I would just wait until it becomes medically necessary, which it won't necessarily.

K.-
My cousin was not circumsized until he was over 18 because his mother thought that it should be his choice whether or not he should be circumsized, and he HATED not being circumsized. He hated undressing in front of his peers, had lower self-esteem when it came towards girls, and he just hated it, and as soon as he turned 18 he had it done. She ended up having 2 more boys and needless to say she had them circumsized. I also had a friend whose insurance didn't cover circumsicion, and so she didn't have her son done until he was 3, and he didn't act like it bothered him at all. He had to have in wrapped just like you would an infant, but he didn't really seem like it bothered him at all. Now, I'm not saying that you have to do it, as it is becoming more common in the US to not be, but it just seems much more socially acceptable that you are, for some reason...

I have 2 boys, almost 3 and almost 5 yrs. Before the first was born, the doctor told us that it is not medically necessary, and from what he was seeing, about 50% of baby boys were having it done at that time. I also have a 9 year old nephew who is not circumcised. So, we chose not to have it done. If the doctor was right about the 50%, he shouldn't be seen as "different".

I opted to have my son circumcised. He did fine and has never had a problem. My husband was circumcised as an infant but it wasn't done properly so he didn't look circumcised. When he went in for his vasectomy he had the doctor do the circumcision correctly. He said that he actually has more sensation now than before the circumcision. I just think you need to do what you think is right, but if you decide to you should do it now before later.

Look at the post on 4/11/2008 about circumsition. There were lots of comments. Mine was one of those so I won't bother repeating it.
Good Luck,
Tam