When my 7 year old goes to school, sometimes she'll freak out during class when its time to do work. She gets very anxious, wiggly, bites her lip, tugs at her hair, and whines. She won't reply when asked a question or she will wait a long time before saying "I don't know" or "I can't do it". The teacher is almost at her wit's end with what to do with my girl. She can't take the extra time all the time to walk my daughter through her work and even with the one-on-one attention my daughter will still freak out.
I get so annoyed by it when it happens at home. She'll know the answer to something easy (like $2 plus $4) but when she's in her "freaked out" mode, she'll purposely give every answer but the correct one... she'll even dance around the right answer! (like nervously answering "$5?" and then "$7?"). Its obvious its not a learning problem since she will purposely give incorrect answers. Could it be an attention problem?
I'm keenly reminded that bi-polar, ADD, and anxiety are big problems in my family. My biggest fear is that she's showing signs of an inherited disorder. About half of my nephews and nieces all started having problems around this age. Her teacher had me sign her up for an after school reading group (reading and math she gets the most upset about). She is in a buddy program where basically an adult spends time with her during lunch time and some recesses. She says they just talk, so I'm wondering if its some kind of counseling.
Has anyone ever had this kind of problem with their kid?
My daughter is signed up for some during-school group counciling and she also has after school tutoring for reading. Its really halping and there's an improvement in her mood, the girls next door even ask to play more often.
I just wanted to give you some support. I really can only suggest that you speak to the school counselor -maybe they can point you in the right direction. We recently discovered that our daughter has OCD behaviors. I understand how hard it is to feel helpless, frustrated, and like there is something wrong with your baby.
Hang in there! H.
I have a 13 year old daughter who is very similar. She has both an anxiety disorder and ADHD. The most helpful thing we did was learn all we could about her, in order to understand how to help her. I would recommend an evaluation called "Neuropsychological Testing". We had ours done at Primary Children's Medical Center. It gave us not only diagnostic information, but pages and pages of suggestions for helping my daughter at home, school and out in public. I would say your daughter might benefit from some medication to help her manage her anxiety. She would probably also benefit from working with a therapist who can teach her very specific actions she can take when she starts to become upset, in order to manage her feelings. Seventh grade and puberty have been a whole new problem for us, so don't wait to find some professional helpers.
Hi R.-
Have you thought about taking her to some counseling? Can it be that the step-family is an issue for her? I have a blended family and I know its difficult. He has 3 older (21,20,19 yr old) kids, but my children have trouble with the mommy issues. They don't understand why they have the same dad but not the same mom.
Also my daughter has shown some signs of autism- ADD. We are not sure yet. We are going through testing, with the 2yr old.
And it is very frustrating....
L.
Bi-polar, ADD, and anxiety are big problems in my family as well. Your daughter sounds alot like mine. Check out the book "the out of sync child" and the following website.
http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/
She may have sensory processing disorder. My Advice is to go through the checklists in the book and website. You can also have her evaluated by a certified Occupational Thearpist. But that is not covered by most insuance companies. Also if she does have this disorder and with the famly back ground I would also have her see a child thearpist as this condition can be devesting to her selfesteem. (Mom's too) My daughter has been going for 6 months and now has stopped saying "I'm stupid" or calling her self fat.
The school can also test her for this.
Good luck
Is it possible that she is doing this for attention? Oh wait I just read were you mentioned that....duh!
It really does sound like it is more of an attention grabber, my little brother who is 14 is bi-polar, add/adhd and really a lot of what your suggesting is not quite the same symptons. I would suggest that when she is in one of her moods to ignore it completely, let her know that you will come back and talk to her when she is done, and ignore whatever becomes of your reaction to her, if you ask her a question and she slides around the answer do the samething, "I will come back to you when you are ready to give me the answer I know you know and thats the correct one" something like that.
I would also suggest finding some activities that would help boost her confidence, because she does sound like she is lacking in that area, maybe a basic dance class or something in an area she likes, and when she does do it right let her know how well she did, don't over praise cause that can lead to other problems but just let her know she did real well.
My oldest does have some learning disabilities, and acts a lot like your daughter, these are just some thing I did with him, and they do help, it takes a little patience in the beginning but by not giving into him helped move us past it.
I hope I helped a little.
Hi R..
I am new to this website.
Read your post. My daughter has similar issues. She is 6 (almost 7) and has been diagnosed w/ bi-polar and sensory processing disorder.
Unfortunately mood disorders do tend to run in families and have a genetic component. It wouldnt hurt to have your daughter evaluated by a doctor.
R.-
If I was you, I would talk to the psychologist at your daughter's school about having her screened. I work part-time as a diagnostic teacher, so I know a little bit about special ed and the referral process. It never hurts to have a child tested, and if everything comes back normal, at least you'll have some peace of mind. Early intervention is best when it comes to kids and learning problems, so I would at least look into it. Hope this helps.
-L.
I agree with one of the other posts. Have her checked by the school. The teacher can suggest her to the early intervention team (that's what I did). I have two children with problems in school. Like she said in her post, it never hurts to check. You do not want to be "blaming her" or thinking she is acting out intentionally if she really has a problem. Good Luck I know how frusterating it can be.
